Some leftover drama from yesterday.....should I be mad?

[npmommie]

I was fuming about this yesterday, but managed to let it go and get over it, but now for some reason it is bugging me again and I am mad all over again.
Tell me disers, should I be mad about this:

dh went for an exercise walk yesterday and took our dd with him. she is 10 yo. my rule is to stay in the neighborhood, not to walk out on the 2 lane ( 50 mph) roadway.
so yes you guessed it. ..........he went out on the roadway with her, about 2/10 of a mile, to loop around and come home.
I specifically told him not to go out there since she was with him.
it makes me nervous, but he did it anyway.

I did talk to him yesterday,and of course it turned into an argument.
he said the road wasn't even busy. and it normally is not, its a country road, but still, when cars come along they are going FAST.

and I am still fuming inside.

would you be mad? so talk me back to sanity about this, or do you agree with me?

 

[NewCrew42]

I was fuming about this yesterday, but managed to let it go and get over it, but now for some reason it is bugging me again and I am mad all over again.
Tell me disers, should I be mad about this:

dh went for an exercise walk yesterday and took dd with him. she is 10 yo. my rule is to stay in the neighborhood, not to walk out on the 2 lane ( 50 mph) roadway.
so yes you guessed it. ..........he went out on the roadway with her, about 2/10 of a mile, to loop around and come home.
I specifically told him not to go out there since she was with him.
it makes me nervous, but he did it anyway.

I did talk to him yesterday,and of course it turned into an argument.
he said the road wasn't even busy. and it normally is not, its a country road, but still, when cars come along they are going FAST.

and I am still fuming inside.

would you be mad? so talk me back to sanity about this, or do you agree with me?

Is he her father or step-father?

 

[npmommie]

Is he her father or step-father?

He is her father. why?

 

[TangaroaTiki]

No, I would not be mad. I would not have told DH where he is allowed to walk with his own child either.

 

[npmommie]

No, I would not be mad. I would not have told DH where he is allowed to walk with his own child either.

even if you thought it was not the safest place to walk?

 

[ols386]

I can understand your not wanting/allowing her to go to that busy street by herself, but if she is with her dad, I don't see it as a problem. She's his daughter too. I don't think he would do anything to put her in danger.

 

[mickeyboat]

Unfortunately, I don't agree with you. I assume your DH is your daughter's father and generally uses good judgement to keep her safe. You two might not always agree on different issues with regard to her safety, but I don't think this is a big deal. It's not like he threw her out of an airplane. Let it go (but make sure your DD understands that she is never to go on that road alone).

 

[goofy!]

I would not be mad. He is her father and is just as entitled to make parenting decisions for his own child.

He obviously thought it was a safe decision.

DH is much more daring than I am. It is good for the kids to experience some stuff that may make me bite my nails. We balance each other out in a good way.

 

[LuvLDM]

No, you shouldn't be mad. Your Dh is a grown man and IMO you had no business telling him where he could walk...w/ or w/out Dd.

 

[npmommie]

I can understand your not wanting/allowing her to go to that busy street by herself, but if she is with her dad, I don't see it as a problem. She's his daughter too. I don't think he would do anything to put her in danger.

you are right. he would not put her in danger, and I am sure he looked out for her. but..........I worry about things like a driver not paying attention, texting, talking, drunk, etc.
I see people walking and jogging on the road all the time though, and my SIL who lives up the road walks out there with her dog all the time.

 

[kacaju]

I was fuming about this yesterday, but managed to let it go and get over it, but now for some reason it is bugging me again and I am mad all over again.
Tell me disers, should I be mad about this:

dh went for an exercise walk yesterday and took dd with him. she is 10 yo. my rule is to stay in the neighborhood, not to walk out on the 2 lane ( 50 mph) roadway.
so yes you guessed it. ..........he went out on the roadway with her, about 2/10 of a mile, to loop around and come home.
I specifically told him not to go out there since she was with him.
it makes me nervous, but he did it anyway.

I did talk to him yesterday,and of course it turned into an argument.
he said the road wasn't even busy. and it normally is not, its a country road, but still, when cars come along they are going FAST.

and I am still fuming inside.

would you be mad? so talk me back to sanity about this, or do you agree with me?

no, I would not be mad....but then again I would never tell my dh he could not take our 10 year old out for a walk on a busy street.
Now when our 10 year old was...say...about 1-6 years of age...no I would not want him walking her out on a busy road, but by 10...unless your 10 year old is very immature...I would expect my child to be able to follow road safety precautions.
Yes, I do realize a car could come up out of no where...but I try not to live my life with those thoughts... Would I allow my 10 year to go by herself...no way..but with her Dad..yes.

 

[doxdogy]

What difference does it make? Also, no I would not be upset.

Is he her father or step-father?

 

[WDWorBUST]

LOL....I thought this was about turkey and potatoes - you know "leftovers"

Now to your question, although I wouldn't tell DH he couldn't take dd on a certain road I would have let him know I wasn't as comfortable with it and then if he did I would be angry that he didn't respect my feelings. I am completely confident in my DH's abilities, but I can understand that you cannot control the cars driving down the road and they go fast enough to warrant discomfort with them taking that road.

 

[mdsoccermom]

No, I would not be mad. I trust my husband's judgement when taking our children out. He is an adult and I wouldn't dream of telling him where to walk with the kids.

 

[npmommie]

I would be angry that he didn't respect my feelings. I am completely confident in my DH's abilities, but I can understand that you cannot control the cars driving down the road and they go fast enough to warrant discomfort with them taking that road.

this is how I feel

 

[kacaju]

you are right. he would not put her in danger, and I am sure he looked out for her. but..........I worry about things like a driver not paying attention, texting, talking, drunk, etc.
I see people walking and jogging on the road all the time though, and my SIL who lives up the road walks out there with her dog all the time.

But that could also happen when you take her out in your own car.

 

[shortbun]

I'm with the others who say that a father should be able to make the safety decision when he's the supervisor. Does he make rules that you have to follow with your daughter?

 

[ols386]

you are right. he would not put her in danger, and I am sure he looked out for her. but..........I worry about things like a driver not paying attention, texting, talking, drunk, etc.
I see people walking and jogging on the road all the time though, and my SIL who lives up the road walks out there with her dog all the time.

I understand where you are coming from. I was like that when my kids were young.

 

[TangaroaTiki]

even if you thought it was not the safest place to walk?

Yes, even if I thought it was unsafe. I think you *might* be more upset that your DH ignored your request that he not walk there.

 

[tw1nsmom]

It would have to be really black and white when it comes to a judgment about safety before I would get mad at my DH. It would have to be something so dangerous that a stranger would call the police (this would never happen)

He is as much my children's parent as I am and he would never put them in a situation where he knew they would be harmed.

I might want to talk about my preferences, but if he said that the road wasn't busy I would trust his judgment.