Actually ADR's are not reservations. Your table is not really being held until you show up. At least that is how I understand the system to work. I think it gives the CMs a better understanding of traffic and crowd control. They also have a better idea of how many walk ups they can seat.
I am not saying people should not try to call if they are going to be late or have to cancel, but things do happen. And I am SURE Disney expects that to happen. Which is why I am sure they have x amount of tables as "buffers" for no-shows, walk ups, people running late, etc.
We already have to be so ruled by our ADRs the way the current system is set up I think Disney would really be shooting themselves in the foot if they charged for missed ADR's.
Trust me, when you have a REALLY late night, the night before, it is totally possible to sleep through any alarm. Life happens. You are almost coming across as though you lead this perfect life, never make any mistakes or ever have any oversights. Sorry, but I am just not buying it. I am a very prepared person, and I still tend to overlook things from time to time. It happens.... and then I move on.