short story--what do you think of my little piece of fiction?(long post)

Briar Rose 7457

Proud of my Princesses
Joined
Apr 9, 2002
Messages
4,944
This is the sad, strange tale of Young Wife, Young Husband, Old Wife and her husband, Old Man.

On a lush green island in the northern seas, Young Wife and her mate, Young Husband, made their home in the king's own city. Young Wife and Young Husband had been raised in small country villages on the island, not far from the great city. But when they married they wanted excitement and adventure, and decided to make their new home in the great city itself. Although they found their life in the city to be joyful and fulfilling, they often travelled back to the country to visit their parents, kinfolk and friends who had stayed behind.

Young Wife's days were filled with fun and adventure. she loved her life in the great city, but equally loved her journeys home to her own village, where she was surrounded by loving family and friends.

Young Wife's one regret was her relationship with her mother-in-law. Although she was always courteous and respectful to the elder woman, Old Wife disapproved of her daughter-in-law and was often unkind to the young woman.

Not long after their marriage, Young Wife learned that she was expecting a child. She calculated that the child would be born late in the fall, after the leaves fell from the trees but before the bitter snows buried the island in a blanket of winter white. With this news she felt her happiness was complete. Would this child be a strong and handsome boy, like his father? Or would it be a daughter, to keep Young Wife company? It mattered not, so long as the child was happy and healthy. And perhaps, when Old Wife learned she was to be a grandmother, Old Wife would soften, and Young Wife's lifrelationship with her would nto be so bitter and unforgiving. After all, Old Wife had no other grandchild upon which to lavish attention.

When Young Wife told Young Husband of their impending parenthood, he became upset and fearful. "Our home is too small," he cried. "I have not established myself in my trade, and cannot support a family." Then: "You used witchcraft and trickery to get yourself with child." He made Young Wife's life miserable for weeks, though eventually he softened, and actually began to look forward to the impending birth of their child.

In the heat of the summer, Old Wife and Old Man announced that when the leaves began to turn, they would sell all their goods and begin a journey south, to make their home in the land of the palm trees. The old couple had been planning this journey for many years, and it would finally come to fruition. They would not be on the lush green island in the northern seas when Young Wife's child was born. Though she was glad that Old Wife would be making the journey south, Young Wife was disappointed that her child would know know its grandparents.

Just before the seasons changed, however, Old Wife fell gravely ill. She spent many days in the medicine man's hut, consuming potions and hoping for a cure. The journey south would have to be delayed. The first frosts had come before the medicine man said Old Wife could make the journey south. Old Wife and Old Man began to sell their goods and pack for the journey.

It was then that young wife's child was born. A girl, a beautiful princess whose very appearance delighted onlookers. At last Young wife and Young Husband felt their lives were complete. The medicine man kept Young Wife in his hut for several days after the birth, but allowed her friends and family to visit. Young Wife's parents and sisters travelled from their small country village to see the child. Other family and friends ventured forth. Young Wife thought: "It was unfortunate that Old Wife became ill. But she is well again. Perhaps it is just as well that she did not travel south as planned, for now she and Old Man can see thier only grandchild before they begin their journey."

But Old Wife and Old Man did not come. Young Wife thought: "Old Wife was ill for so long. Perhaps she could not bring herself to come to the medicine man's hut, even for a short but happy visit."

Young Husband brought his wife and child to their humble home, and invited all of their friends and relatives to see the child. Everyone came, and the house was filled with happy sounds.

Old Wife and Old Man did not come. Young Wife thought: "Our house was so crowded. Perhaps Old Wife was afraid that being with so many people would make her ill again."

The friends and relatives went home to their own villages. All but Young Wife's mother, who stayed to help her with the baby.

Old Wife and Old Man did not come. Young Wife thought: "Old Wife does not get along with my mother. Perhaps she felt it would be awkward and uncomfortable if she came to visit while my mother is here."

Eventually Young Wife's mother returned to her own village, and Young Wife and Young Husband were left alone with their young child.

Old Wife and Old Man did not come. Young Wife thought: "Perhaps they are so busy preparing for their journey that they have no time to visit."

At last, word came that Old Wife and Old man were ready to being their journey. They would travel overland, past many cities and villages, across rivers and plains, to get to the land of the palm trees. Their journey would take them right through the city where Young Wife and Young Man made their home. Young Wife thought: "We live right near the main road. They will have to travel right past our home on their way to the land of the palm trees. Of course they will pause in their journey to see their only grandchild!"


But Old Wife and Old Man did not come. After many days, word reached Young Husband that his parents had completed their journey, and were now in the land of the palm trees.

Young wife did not know what to think.
 














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