Scared & need your thoughts -DD is getting notes

[bengalbelle]

backpack is being kept behind the teacher desk now.

I'm sure you're feeling very overwhelmed by the responses here in addition to the worry and fear you already have. I think what has so many people concerned is that the principal and teacher were supposedly monitoring the situation but 2 notes still found their way into your daughter's booksack. That is what I find so frightening. I don't think the principal and teacher are equipped to handle this and your daughter is too young to ensure her own safety. I don't understand the reluctance to involve the police. From what you've posted it sounds like this person is very close to her. Is the teacher going to go with your daughter every time she goes to the bathroom? Is she able to give your daughter undivided attention during recess? I am a former teacher and I know that I would not be able to give your daughter undivided attention during school hours, and I would hope the parents would turn it over to someone trained to handle this sort of situation. I don't know how common school violence is in Canada, but we're seeing more and more of it here in the US. It's very frightening for any parent who has a schoolage child.

 

[Keli]

Until the note showed up saying "you will die" I wasn't taking this too seriously (as another poster said), it sounded like some kid trying to scare your dd. But making threats like that, a kid or not, is something very serious. I'm sorry this is going on and I hope the person responsible is caught quickly.

 

[Tuffcookie]

Moving the backpack was a DUMB idea. Who thought of that????

I would have left it where it was and had a surveillance camera mounted in the room.

Then you would have found out who was doing this.

BTW, after that last note I would NOT be sending my child to school!

TC

 

[jcsbama]

Couple of questions regarding the updated information...#1 what did the second note say? #2 I'm assuming she received the notes before administrators had a chance to talk to the classes about this kind of behavior (if it is a kid)? #3 what is her schedule like? (i.e. Does she change classes? How often does she access her backpack throughout the day? Does she ever leave the classroom for lunch, recess, etc and her backpack stay in the room?) #4 Is it wise to have the teacher single her out and her backpack stay behind the teacher's desk? It may alert the other kids that something is up, unfortunately, give them a reason to tease her for being frightened, or worse, change the behavior of the person responsible. You want to be able to catch this person. Right now, his form of contact has been the backpack. If you take that away, a new form of contact may be created, one that could be dangerous for your daughter. I am really praying this is just a kid, maybe a boy that has a crush on your daughter and trying to get her attention. Be strong!

 

[dturner]

Personally at this point, with that last note....I would keep my child home. Call the police liason & if he/she doesn't already know about that note, they should & yes, I would also go to the police immediately.

I also would keep my child at home and with me 24/7 until this is resolved.

How scary for you and your family

We are all praying for you!!

 

[mum4jenn]

Please don't take this the wrong way, but is there any chance that your daughter is doing this herself for some attention? I know I did some crazy stuff as a child just to get my mom's attention.

I was thinking the same thing but was afraid to be the first to write anything. I sure hope that is not the case but when the poster said something was not adding up and more notes showed up even though the backpack is being watched sent off the alert for me. I hope it is not what has happened but then again at least then it is not a crazy person looking to hurt your dd if that is the case.

 

[Tantor]

I can see waiting until tomorrow as she will be with you from now until then. This sounds so scary and you seem pretty calm which I am sure will help your DD be able to feel better. Hugs to you and her!

I am trying to keep calm and not lose it. It won't do my DD any good if I do that.
The police have been informed. Believe me we WILL be demanding. I would rather meet them in the school setting and have the kids and teachers see what is happening and how seroius this has become. If they don't meet up to our demands we are going to the police station.
I have been trying to keep Chloe calm. She is already stressed out over this. I will be in the school tomorrow and all the teachers and lunchroom staff are very aware of what is happening.

 

[Tantor]

We did talk to her about if she wrote the notes but she said she didn't and I believe her. I can tell by the look on her face. And she would have fessed up by now with the police getting involved.

 

[tarmand]

We did talk to her about if she wrote the notes but she said she didn't and I believe her. I can tell by the look on her face. And she would have fessed up by now with the police getting involved.

Well, in a way, I'm sad to hear that it's not her. At least then you would know that there's no threat. Does she have any friends that seem to be in need of attention. Maybe it's a girl and not a boy at all. Are there any girls that are jealous of your daughter?

 

[Patty3]

I am so sorry that you are dealing with this. Hugs to all of you.

 

[Rajah]

No question, I'd be keeping my daughter *at home* until this was resolved.

 

[bengalbelle]

The police have been informed.

By you or the school? Do they know your daughter received a note telling her she would die?

I will be in the school tomorrow and all the teachers and lunchroom staff are very aware of what is happening.

Being aware and being able to do anything about it are two different things. I just hope one of these people you're entrusting your daughter's safety to is not the person doing the threatening.

to your daughter. I feel bad for her.

 

[LisaR]

I just can't imagine that this is a child that is doing this. Maybe it is denial on my part. However, the wording just doesn't seem like something a child would write or take the time to put it in a plastic bag. I would be VERY suspicious of the adults your dd is in contact with. The person you feel may be protecting her could very well be the person she should be avoiding the most.

Lisa

 

[Tantor]

By you or the school? Do they know your daughter received a note telling her she would die?


Being aware and being able to do anything about it are two different things. I just hope one of these people you're entrusting your daughter's safety to is not the person doing the threatening.

to your daughter. I'm sure she needs them.

Yes she had called in the morning to have the Police school liason come to the school and then when the 2 other notes came the school called them again right away. The principals husband is the director of police services for this area so that certainly helped.
I truly believe it is a child in the school. The printing is very child like. Something a gr3 , 4 or 5 might do. I'm just appaled at the weirdness of the notes. This child is sick and needs to be out of the school.
All of Chloe's classmates know she has been targeted and some of them are being *bodyguards* She is staying around adults at recess and lunch and is being very aware. Karate has taught her that.
I will update after the meeting with the police. I am so done right now I need to go and relax.
Thanks for all your prayers and hugs.

 

[crazee4mickey]

It was really disturbing before, but when there is a threat of death "You will die" that is something I would not tempt fate on. I would be keeping my child with me at all times----
I wonder as well if it could it be an adult within the school or someone who doesn't raise suspicions when they are in the school? This is way too unsettling---interesting how she received two more notes---was it after a break(recess, noon hour)or when there may be traffic in the school where the staff may not have been paying attention?
The wording just seems to "mature" for a child---even if they did find it in a book, game, video, etc. Like I said I can't think of a child age 9 or 10 saying such evil things---yes I know they are quite capable but it just seems like way too much thought has been put into these notes to be a child.
I feel so bad for your daughter and what you guys are going through----keep safe

 

[Aidensmom]

I would not have her go to school tomorrow. That last note is a real threat. I am so sorry you and she are going through this.

 

[julia & nicks mom]

I truly believe it is a child in the school. The printing is very child like. Something a gr3 , 4 or 5 might do. I'm just appaled at the weirdness of the notes. This child is sick and needs to be out of the school.
All of Chloe's classmates know she has been targeted and some of them are being *bodyguards* She is staying around adults at recess and lunch and is being very aware. Karate has taught her that.
I will update after the meeting with the police. I am so done right now I need to go and relax.
Thanks for all your prayers and hugs.

Okay - you all can flame away but I have to say this -

so you have not personally spoken with the police? You realize the school will try to downplay the matter with them don't you? They do not want any bad publicity that might come with this

also - if this person is careful enough to put it in a plastic bag and get it into a watched backpack unnoticed - then they are probably being clever enough to use handwriting that will throw anyone off their path - I pray to God you are right and it is a student -

but school personnel is not equipped to handle the situation - I was the school personnel in a situation like this and you know what - I refused to go to work on the day the person was threatening to blow it up - and when we saw that person on school grounds several months later - you want to know how I handled it - I kept walking to my car - left school grounds and called the principal inside so he could deal with it- b/c MY safety came #1 to me - that may sound selfish - but I was not being paid enough nor did I have the proper training to deal with the situation

I really don't understand your reluctance to go to the police now - so the kids at school can see it? you should have patrols on your street already - this person is watching your DD outside of school - you KNOW this - please take the steps to protect her AND your family NOW!!!!!

if I was your daughter - I would wonder why you had not already gone to the police - I would wonder why you weren't taking every ridiculous step to protect my life -

as a parent - I would much rather blow this WAY out of proportion than be wrong

I am sure you are worn out from this - but you can't be done with it - I am begging you to go to the police station tonight -

 

[drgnfly30]

I'm so sorry your family is going through this

I know you are doing your very best to deal with this but having been through a couple of scary situations myself, I wouldn't be relying on the school to act as a liasion with the police.. you are her guardian you should be filing the report, at the police station, immediately - they're open 24/7!!!

Also, I know you want her looked after but telling the entire staff may not have been the best idea... if it is a staff member, alerting them to the fact that it is being investigated, they may stop & may never be caught. I would NOT remove the backpack.. I agree with some other posters that this is the persons way of communicating & once removed, the contact could either escalate OR stop.. again potentially causing the person to not be caught.

I'm keeping you in my prayers... hang in there & keep us updated! Child or Adult this person needs help...

 

[gemmasmomma]

i don't know why ppl are automatically assuming this has anything to do with a video game... there is a lot more damaging content on tv than there is in most games, and a lot of ppl leave their kids to rot in front of teletoon for hours on end. playing a video game requires a concious decision on the part of the parent to go to the store, pick up the box (hopefully look at the rating) and purchase it. and just as an FYI most parents aren't going to shell out the cost of the game plus monthly subscription fees for their 4th grader to play world of warcraft online. it's a pricey game with a recurring monthly fee and not meant for kids. and further world of warcraft - along with halo, guild wars and lots of other games - doesn't take place on earth, as mentioned in a note.

and whatever the cause it doesn't matter, whoever is leaving these messages is obviously derranged, it doesn't matter what they're quoting. you need to get the school and/or the police involved.

 

[bumcat]

I noticed on your public profile it says you volunteer at the school. Is it possible that an adult volunteer or staff is really upset with you and this is their sick way to get back at you? Do you talk around any of the adults about your family activities?
Also it could still be an adult making it look like child like handwriting.