Opinions on this school lunch matter

[disykat]

I spent A LOT of time at my kid's school, however I wouldn't step foot in their lunchroom during lunch unless I absolutely had to for work (I substitute teach) or to get into the PTA closet for something. Frankly, I always feel sorry for those kids whose moms come in just for lunch. I think it's weird and from what I've seen, most of the kids do too. My kids know they're loved, they don't need me bringing them lunch or sending them flowers or balloons at school. At home, they're MY special person, at school, they're just one of the bunch.

I also think it's very rude to single out your child's friends for a treat.

 

[Hannathy]

I just wanted to add that i don't care about the McD's or whatever for your child but I don't like the pizza for a couple of kids only. I'm tired and don't think I said that.

I would never bring in pizza for an exclusive few but don't tell me not to for my own child or what to feed him.

I would have had a fit if they checked my childs luch for content like one poster's. It would not have been pretty. next time put all the pieces for the sandwich into seperate bags gee now it is 3 things-how idiotic.

 

[Aimeedyan]

In elem school, I was always so jealous of kids that got to buy their lunch. My parents couldn't afford it so we had to take sandwiches. Everyone who bought lunch ended up at the end of the table because you had to sit according to where you were in line. Sack lunch kids sat at the head of the table. Believe me, cool kids don't bring their lunch (at least not at my school) so I sat with the "uncool" kids everyday.

I promise I'm not scarred for life. I still made friends and learned that life isn't always fair. Same as when Lunchables became popular and my mom refused to buy them for me because they were $ but the kids around me had them. Or the kids allowed to have 2 desserts and a Coke in their sacklunch.

Just part of life. Unless you make a uniform lunch that every child has to eat, there will ALWAYS be differences in what kids are getting to eat. Funny that is often the same argument used for school uniforms

(I will add that bringing pizza for a few kids isn't cool but bringing a special lunch for YOUR kid and eating with YOUR kid isn't a big deal, IMO)

 

[Cool-Beans]

I've never heard of this practice before so it must not be common here. I do know that if a child forgets his/her lunch at home the parent can bring it in but it must be left in the office and the child has to pick it up. Parents aren't allowed in the cafeteria to eat with their kids or bring them a special lunch. I wonder who makes the policy, is it by individual school, district, state??

Our school needed moms to come in and do lunch duty. There are what the kids call "PTA Moms" who just can't enough of being around the school and they do a LOT of it, but they still asked for volunteers to help out.

You stand around while the kids eat. Then you go outside and stand around while the kids play. Once in a while, a tattle-tale comes up to *******..otherwise, the kids ignore you and you just stand around talking to other mom recruits. Extraordinarily boring. I did it one week out of the year, as many moms did. On the day I'd do it, I'd bring one of my kids McDonalds.

It seriously wasn't a big deal at all...except to the kid who got it. They'll remember their McDonalds at school for the rest of their lives.

 

[southernbohemian]

I think it is okay if it was a kid's birthday, but doing it more than once a year, especially once a week, sound like a parent showing off, not a treat. Are they doing it because it's what the kid wants? Well, your kid would also be really happy if you did their homework for them, but you don't do that. No, they are doing it because it seems cool and they want that for their child. No one wants their child to be unpopular, but these moms who are obsessed with making their kids cool are just ridiculous - live your own life. And trying to make your kid popular does involve making them "better" than other kids - that's what you're teaching your child by bringing them fast food once a week - that they are "better" than the kids who don't have it. If it was just a treat they would save it for the weekend of after school. Showing off, plain and simple.

 

[DISUNC]

I never heard of any of this!

I just KNOW I would have been MORTIFIED if my Mom showed up at school to bring me lunch!!!!

 

[Cool-Beans]

I never heard of any of this!

I just KNOW I would have been MORTIFIED if my Mom showed up at school to bring me lunch!!!!

Noooo! Not if everyone's mom had to show up and do Lunch Duty one week out of the year. And not if she just brought it over and gave it to you and walked away. Then you'd just be happy to have it.

I'd never mortify my kids...unless it was for a purpose. Off Topic: DS with dangerous, deadly allergies started "forgetting" his Epi-pen ("Bee Sting Kit") in his teens. Didn't want to be embarrassed by carrying it around. We had many fights about it and finally he just said he wouldn't do it.

Puhleeze. Who is the queen?! Try to out-stubborn me. HA!

I showed up at football practice once and went up to him, right in front of the football players and with a really high, sing-song voice said, "Sweeeeetie Poo, you forgot you Epi-pen! Here you gooo. You look so CUTE in your little football outfit! OK, now, go get a homerun!!! Bye, sweetie!...Aren't you going to say 'goodbye' and give me a kiss? Oh, I know. You're being Mr. Football Guy, all rouuuugh and touuuuugh. OK, Ill see you later. Bye, honey!" Oh, was he mad. I think it was 2 or 3 days before he even spoke to me again. But he never "forgot" that thing on purpose again, either!!

The coach thought I was very funny.

 

[DISUNC]

Noooo! Not if everyone's mom had to show up and do Lunch Duty one week out of the year. And not if she just brought it over and gave it to you and walked away. Then you'd just be happy to have it..

When I went to school ...way back in the dark ages...this wasn't even allowed! But really I dont know of anyone who has done this in our grammer schools!

I'd never mortify my kids...unless it was for a purpose. Off Topic: DS with dangerous, deadly allergies started "forgetting" his Epi-pen ("Bee Sting Kit") in his teens. Didn't want to be embarrassed by carrying it around. We had many fights about it and finally he just said he wouldn't do it.

Puhleeze. Who is the queen?! Try to out-stubborn me. HA!

I showed up at football practice once and went up to him, right in front of the football players and with a really high, sing-song voice said, "Sweeeeetie Poo, you forgot you Epi-pen! Here you gooo. You look so CUTE in your little football outfit! OK, now, go get a homerun!!! Bye, sweetie!...Aren't you going to say 'goodbye' and give me a kiss? Oh, I know. You're being Mr. Football Guy, all rouuuugh and touuuuugh. OK, Ill see you later. Bye, honey!" Oh, was he mad. I think it was 2 or 3 days before he even spoke to me again. But he never "forgot" that thing on purpose again, either!!

The coach thought I was very funny.

So do I...AND I AM SURE HIS TEAMMATES GOT A REAL BIG Over it!

 

[shortbun]

no big deal

 

[meandtheguys2]

I think it is nice. Cliques exist, whether there is pizza involved or not. A clique is just a group of friends with similar interests.

Kids are under so much pressure, that some good natured fun isn't a bad thing. Now, if that parent came in every day, i'd probably feel that there were some issues.

 

[daisyduck123]

1st grade teacher here

We just discussed this at a faculty meeting last week because we watched 2 1st grade moms show up with 5 Happy Meals for their kids & their friends.
We teachers wanted to have something put in the school newsletter stating "No fast food allowed to be brought in" & my principal said she is not allowed to state that.

But my owns son's school just down the road from us stated the very same thing back in their September newsletter.

I feel for you...we've got the same thing going on at my school.

 

[aprilgail2]

I think it has a lot less to do with economical issues than social ones. Honestly, can't these parents wait until 3 o'clock to see their kids? School is for school, not a happy little lunch with a helicopter mom that can't stay away from Junior. Save the lunch for Saturday and let your kid have a whole day on his or her own.

I agree! Can't they just leave their child in school the 6 hours without helicoptering over them for part of the day?? I am so glad at my daughters school parents are not even allowed in the cafeteria. We pay aides to do lunch and playground duty, same people every day, parents don't do those jobs-the union would have a fit if parents started that stuff!!! There are no parent volunteers in the classrooms and I SO prefer i that way-no hearing "hey little jonny can't read " and "Sally is SO bad-I swear that kid has ADHD" "Cindys hair is always unkept" like I hear when I visit a friend in another state from her and her group of classroom helper moms....I think its an invasion of the kids privacy to have moms of kids in their class working in the classrooms.

 

[SandraVB79]

I think it has a lot less to do with economical issues than social ones. Honestly, can't these parents wait until 3 o'clock to see their kids? School is for school, not a happy little lunch with a helicopter mom that can't stay away from Junior. Save the lunch for Saturday and let your kid have a whole day on his or her own.

I don't think I would have wanted my mom to come to school to have lunch with me. It's actually pretty sad, that you can't go without junior/ parent for a whole day...

They do have one weird (IMO) rule - which is that children who bring their lunch have to have at least four different things in their lunchbox. If they don't, the kid has to take a school lunch and his account is charged. I found this out when I sent my son to school with a ham sandwich, pretzels, and lemonade and he had to take full lunch tray (which he did not touch). Normally, I would have thrown in a dessert, but we were out of chocolate chip cookies, and he didn't like any of the other types of desserts I did have.

I did it amusing that adding cookies to his lunchbox would have made the school consider his lunch more appropriate.

Actually it's sad... those people, with their great logic, have to teach your children...

 

[ugadog99]

If your cafeteria food is as GROSS as ours, perhaps you'd bring your child something different. Honestly, I'd PAY the parents to bring me a lunch every now and then. When my own children were at school with me, I'd manage to bring in some decent food every now and then for the three of us.

 

[CEDmom]

I'll have to ask my DD if anyone does stuff like this. I've never heard of parents doing this. I don't think her school allows parents in at lunch time. They get very little time to eat so I think parents would just be a distraction. I pack her lunch everyday and she always gets a little treat and sometimes a note.

I'm up at her school at least 2 times a week and haven't seen parents come in with McDonalds or anything else for that matter. I know there's no sharing of food in the lunch room so bringing for a group is out.

BTW, if parents are doing this because the cafeteria food is bad can't they just pack their child a lunch. Personally if parents are routinely doing this I think it's more about needing to see their child or for their own ego - "oh look what a great mom little Johnny has" .

 

[cccm]

Remember this is my opinion, I am sure I am going to get flamed for a comment below. Maybe its me, maybe its the schools I went to, part of me thinks it could be a thing up here in MA. I've never heard of this. This is just wrong in many ways. It is not sending the right message. School and particularly little girls are difficutlt enough without a parent or school allowing the cliques to be introduced in this manner.

This is the time for children to be independent, grow and learn to socialize. Not have Mommy running in with McDonalds.

DDs school is on lockdown it seems, principal is a prison guard. Unless you have a Parent Teacher Meeting or a specific reason to be there (book fair, class presentation) you are not to be there. If you do come in for one of those reasons you must sign in, wear a badge and sign out. There is always someone at the entrance to the school. If you volunteer you must have a CORI (Criminal background check). So I can understand why she is doing it in some ways, security. We have all seen the scary things in the news over the years. Whether it be a madman or just a pervert.

Now if you are there to deliver cupcakes because it is DDs Birthday, you cannot bring them down to the class, you must leave them at the front.

Message is clear, unless you volunteer you do not belong in school.

Well today is Teacher Appreciation Day, so I get to figure out how to get what they asked me to bring into school.

 

[stargrazer]

It happends here; I don't do it but don't care if others do. Some parents come and eat the school lunch with their kids everyday, too. None of it is my business.

But for you nice folks yelling 'clique' and 'anti-community fosterng'...well YEAH. It's going to happen regardless of whether it's over food, clothes, grades, after-school activities, whatever. We are all created equal, yes, but we're not all the same and we're going to assimilate ourselves to those that are most like us.

Little Jane and Johnny might as well start figuring out now the truth - that life is NOT fair in the least bit. I think we sheild our kids too much from reality, IMO.

 

[LindsayDunn228]

I think it has a lot less to do with economical issues than social ones. Honestly, can't these parents wait until 3 o'clock to see their kids? School is for school, not a happy little lunch with a helicopter mom that can't stay away from Junior. Save the lunch for Saturday and let your kid have a whole day on his or her own.

What she said.

 

[MichelleVW]

I don't think I would have wanted my mom to come to school to have lunch with me. It's actually pretty sad, that you can't go without junior/ parent for a whole day...



...

I wouldn't have wanted it either, but when my girls were in elementary school they wanted me to bring them lunch occasionally. It wasn't a big deal, they liked it...I hated it, but it wasn't for me....Just because you bring a Happy Meal to school once or twice a year that you can't go without your kids or vice versa....mine have been going to daycare since birth...we do ok separated.

I get tired of the "it's not fair that you get McDonalds and I don't" crap if someone's child has a meltdown because my kid got McDonalds for lunch once or twice a year, that really isn't my problem and they need to learn that life really isn't fair and not everything is equal...

 

[castleview]

It happends here; I don't do it but don't care if others do. Some parents come and eat the school lunch with their kids everyday, too. None of it is my business.

But for you nice folks yelling 'clique' and 'anti-community fosterng'...well YEAH. It's going to happen regardless of whether it's over food, clothes, grades, after-school activities, whatever. We are all created equal, yes, but we're not all the same and we're going to assimilate ourselves to those that are most like us.

Little Jane and Johnny might as well start figuring out now the truth - that life is NOT fair in the least bit. I think we sheild our kids too much from reality, IMO.

I'm going to get smacked down for this and I realize this is JMO. But isn't school supposed to be a place to work and learn independence? Is having your mom bring you (and sometimes your friends) cooler food, sit with you through lunch and ensure your popularity preparing you for reality?