"Open Casket" when it should have been "Closed Casket"

[Disney.Ears]

I've never been to a viewing or anything so I don't have any stories.
But to anyone who's had to make that decision or has witnessed something that has, hurt them when seeing the body. I'm sorry for your lossesa

 

[AmazingGrace]

Thought of two more.

Back in the early 1900s my great-grandfather helped dig the graves at our church. This lady had died and the family buried her. Well her parents made it into community a few days later and the mother demanded to see her daughter. So my grandfather and a few others dug the women's casket back up. Now remember we are talking rural Alabama around 1915. Well when they dug her up and opened the casket, it seems that the women hadn't really died. Because their was claw marks where she had used her nails to claw the wood above her. She had also pulled out all of her hair. He said the look of death on her face, was something he would never forget.

Also back in the 40s, the viewing was still done at home (it's still done ever once and while). My grandmother and a few other ladies were taken the flowers out to the cemetery to lay over the ground of the new grave. As they were leaving she was walking and sunk straight down to her knees into a grave that wasn't marked.

I've hear that back in the olden days, they would put a bell on a rope with the end of the rope going doen into the coffin. It was actually someone's job to watch the grave yard and if the bell rang, to unbury the bell ringer. Has anyone ever heard that before?

 

[MaryAnnDVC]

I went to a wake just last night for a young man...father of two...who was killed in a rollover accident. It was open casket. He looked fine...no sign of injury...but I had never met him before (I know his parents well through sports) so I don't know if he looked like himself or not. I was glad it was open casket...I think it made a huge impression on my DS (15) who will be getting his permit in less than a year (the young man wasn't wearing a seatbelt, which may or may not have mattered in the end). Both parents spoke to my son about the importance of wearing a seatbelt...they both work a lot with kids and are two of the best people I know.

 

[jamimb]

I have not read the whole thread but I will give you my story.

When I was 15 my mom and 6 yr old sister were killed in a car accident. Neither were wearing their seatbelts. My sis was thrown through the windshield and on to thw road but amazingly enough only had a small cut above her eyebrow. My mother however was nearly decapitated and her lips had to be sown back on. My grandmother decided in spite of all this that we should have an open casket funeral To make matters worse me and my 13 yr old sis did not want to see them but we were pretty much forced to by family who thought we would never have closure if we didnt. Now my sis just looked like she was asleep but my mom looked horrific. something out of a horror movie. It took me years to get that image out of my head and now I wonder why in the world would anyone choose to do this.

I can see doing this if the person looks okay though.

 

[Biscuitsmom31]

This thread inspired me to decide what I want done with me when I pass. I read about the life-gem diamonds and I told DH that I want to be cremated and turned into a diamond. He thinks I'm nuts. I've been going around the house singing, "I'm just an old lump of coal but I'm gonna be a diamond someday"

 

[mamamary]

I've hear that back in the olden days, they would put a bell on a rope with the end of the rope going doen into the coffin. It was actually someone's job to watch the grave yard and if the bell rang, to unbury the bell ringer. Has anyone ever heard that before?

Saw this in a tv show or movie (can't remember which) but don't know if that was really done or not.

 

[Deb in IA]

This thread inspired me to decide what I want done with me when I pass. I read about the life-gem diamonds and I told DH that I want to be cremated and turned into a diamond. He thinks I'm nuts. I've been going around the house singing, "I'm just an old lump of coal but I'm gonna be a diamond someday"

You are a DIAMOND IN THE ROUGH!!

 

[mamamary]

I have not read the whole thread but I will give you my story.

When I was 15 my mom and 6 yr old sister were killed in a car accident. Neither were wearing their seatbelts. My sis was thrown through the windshield and on to thw road but amazingly enough only had a small cut above her eyebrow. My mother however was nearly decapitated and her lips had to be sown back on. My grandmother decided in spite of all this that we should have an open casket funeral To make matters worse me and my 13 yr old sis did not want to see them but we were pretty much forced to by family who thought we would never have closure if we didnt. Now my sis just looked like she was asleep but my mom looked horrific. something out of a horror movie. It took me years to get that image out of my head and now I wonder why in the world would anyone choose to do this.

I can see doing this if the person looks okay though.

 

[MaryAnnDVC]

I have not read the whole thread but I will give you my story.

When I was 15 my mom and 6 yr old sister were killed in a car accident. Neither were wearing their seatbelts. My sis was thrown through the windshield and on to thw road but amazingly enough only had a small cut above her eyebrow. My mother however was nearly decapitated and her lips had to be sown back on. My grandmother decided in spite of all this that we should have an open casket funeral To make matters worse me and my 13 yr old sis did not want to see them but we were pretty much forced to by family who thought we would never have closure if we didnt. Now my sis just looked like she was asleep but my mom looked horrific. something out of a horror movie. It took me years to get that image out of my head and now I wonder why in the world would anyone choose to do this.

I can see doing this if the person looks okay though.

I'm so sorry. How awful for you.

 

[MaryAnnDVC]

This thread inspired me to decide what I want done with me when I pass. I read about the life-gem diamonds and I told DH that I want to be cremated and turned into a diamond. He thinks I'm nuts. I've been going around the house singing, "I'm just an old lump of coal but I'm gonna be a diamond someday"

I remember first hearing about this on the "reality show" Family Plots a few years ago. The funeral director's son had died, and he had him made into earrings, I think for his DD. I'm not sure how I feel about that. One problem I have is being terribly afraid I'd LOSE the earrings (if I could ever bring myself to actually wear a deceased member of my family). I have a pair of diamond earrings that DH bought me when we got engaged, and I hate to wear them because I might lose them...not because they're diamonds, but because they're sentimental. How much more sentimental can you get then the lifegem diamonds?

 

[HelenePA]

If you do the diamond thing what do you want done with the rest of your ashes?? Trust me when I say in the end your way more than the 1oz you need to create the diamond... I have 2 boxes (mom and dad) up on my computer center...

 

[nannerbadnanner]

I have not read the whole thread but I will give you my story.

When I was 15 my mom and 6 yr old sister were killed in a car accident. Neither were wearing their seatbelts. My sis was thrown through the windshield and on to thw road but amazingly enough only had a small cut above her eyebrow. My mother however was nearly decapitated and her lips had to be sown back on. My grandmother decided in spite of all this that we should have an open casket funeral To make matters worse me and my 13 yr old sis did not want to see them but we were pretty much forced to by family who thought we would never have closure if we didnt. Now my sis just looked like she was asleep but my mom looked horrific. something out of a horror movie. It took me years to get that image out of my head and now I wonder why in the world would anyone choose to do this.

I can see doing this if the person looks okay though.

I am so sorry.

 

[perdidobay]

I've hear that back in the olden days, they would put a bell on a rope with the end of the rope going doen into the coffin. It was actually someone's job to watch the grave yard and if the bell rang, to unbury the bell ringer. Has anyone ever heard that before?

I checked out Snopes.com and it's true.

http://www.snopes.com/horrors/gruesome/buried.asp

The article is about burial of live people thought to be dead.
It's a long article and the info on the rope and bell is there as well.

Wakes were held to see if the dead "woke up" before the burial.

 

[joshsmom]

Well, now that we have the "bell" question solved, can someone answer my question from several pages back?

In the Guns N Roses video for November Rain there is an open casket. It is implied that the girl suffered a traumatic death and there is a mirror in the casket reflecting the side of her face without the trauma. Is that really done in funeral homes (using the mirror to conceal the trauma and "reflect" the non-trauma side) or is this just a video thing that they did? I've always wondered that.

 

[Biscuitsmom31]

If you do the diamond thing what do you want done with the rest of your ashes?? Trust me when I say in the end your way more than the 1oz you need to create the diamond... I have 2 boxes (mom and dad) up on my computer center...

I want them to use all of me to make a huge diamond that is too big to lose. Just kidding. I guess you can do whatever you want with the rest.

 

[Biscuitsmom31]

I remember first hearing about this on the "reality show" Family Plots a few years ago. The funeral director's son had died, and he had him made into earrings, I think for his DD. I'm not sure how I feel about that. One problem I have is being terribly afraid I'd LOSE the earrings (if I could ever bring myself to actually wear a deceased member of my family). I have a pair of diamond earrings that DH bought me when we got engaged, and I hate to wear them because I might lose them...not because they're diamonds, but because they're sentimental. How much more sentimental can you get then the lifegem diamonds?

If my family lost me or if I was pawned, I would hope my family wouldn't be too upset about it. Maybe someone else would find me and wear me.

 

[HelenePA]

I want them to use all of me to make a huge diamond that is too big to lose. Just kidding. I guess you can do whatever you want with the rest.

You can be shot into space for a mere 750$ (I'm SO doing this with my dad!), you can be made into a living coral reef. So many things you can do with ashes! Yes I might sound morbid but seriously my life revolves around death... My one friend told me I should look into being a funeral director... uh Yeah not happening... its not by choice I am dealing with all these deaths!

 

[Biscuitsmom31]

You can be shot into space for a mere 750$ (I'm SO doing this with my dad!), you can be made into a living coral reef. So many things you can do with ashes! Yes I might sound morbid but seriously my life revolves around death... My one friend told me I should look into being a funeral director... uh Yeah not happening... its not by choice I am dealing with all these deaths!

A coral reef? Wow! I had no idea there were so many choices.

 

[Disney Doll]

I've hear that back in the olden days, they would put a bell on a rope with the end of the rope going doen into the coffin. It was actually someone's job to watch the grave yard and if the bell rang, to unbury the bell ringer. Has anyone ever heard that before?

I have heard that.

I have also heard that the reason viewings even started, and are also called "wakes" is because they kept the person out of the ground for a day or two to make sure they were really dead and didn't "wake" up.

 

[kellig]

In the Guns N Roses video for November Rain there is an open casket. It is implied that the girl suffered a traumatic death and there is a mirror in the casket reflecting the side of her face without the trauma. Is that really done in funeral homes (using the mirror to conceal the trauma and "reflect" the non-trauma side) or is this just a video thing that they did? I've always wondered that.

Sorry, no answer to your question....just hoping someone else does. some "old school" GNR!