o/t - why are people so rude?

[LSmith]

what goes around comes around!

That's right. And that makes you both EQUALS in the rude comments.

 

[ado121]

That's right. And that makes you both EQUALS in the rude comments.

no. i just know how to stand up for myself. i dont like/won't tolerate people talking badly to me. i don't comment to others on the size of their families if they even have one at all, so what makes them have the right to say somet hing to me. and make it sound so negative.

sounds like you are out to start a fight, but you won't get that from me. im happy with life. just sick of the negativity.

 

[Nagle]

no. i just know how to stand up for myself. i dont like/won't tolerate people talking badly to me. i don't comment to others on the size of their families if they even have one at all, so what makes them have the right to say somet hing to me. and make it sound so negative.

sounds like you are out to start a fight, but you won't get that from me. im happy with life. just sick of the negativity.

I don't believe that the poster was starting a fight. You just seem to be having difficulty with someone possibly disagreeing with you and stating their opinion.
You claim to be offended when someone makes a comment about you finally having a boy, yet you have just that sentiment in your own signature here on the DIS. Maybe these people have heard you express these same thoughts yourself.

 

[LSmith]

no. i just know how to stand up for myself. i dont like/won't tolerate people talking badly to me. i don't comment to others on the size of their families if they even have one at all, so what makes them have the right to say somet hing to me. and make it sound so negative.

sounds like you are out to start a fight, but you won't get that from me. im happy with life. just sick of the negativity.

Not trying to start a fight at all. Can opinions that differ from yours be said?

What’s wrong with asking if they are all yours? I don’t think that is a rude question. Unless, of course, you want it to be. I find it funny that anyone would think that having four kids is overly large.

Personally I was told many times during my last pregnancy that it looked like I was having twins. I thought it was funny. Even my husband said it and was shocked when the ultrasound showed only one baby. I WAS big.

If people thought you were pregnant when you weren’t maybe it wasn’t said out of rudeness but they genuinely thought you were pregnant. Haven’t we all made that mistake? Thinking some woman was pregnant but she wasn’t? Oops. Embarrassing for both parties involved. We just learn not to mention it until we are sure.

Furthermore, of course we all love our children, be they male or female. As you know by your own tag many of us do want at least one of each.

It seems to me that people can be hypersensitive to comments made to them and when they perceive any slight they go for the jugular.

Catty is catty.

 

[ado121]

. Haven’t we all made that mistake? Thinking some woman was pregnant but she wasn’t? Oops. Embarrassing for both parties involved. We just learn not to mention it until we are sure..

nope. NEVER have I done that! I learned to keep my mouth shut on that subject. To me thats just common sense to not comment on a persons size. You wouldn't say something to an obese person would you?, so why say it to a woman you think might be pregnant.

i changed my tag to avoid any more discussions!

 

[LSmith]

nope. NEVER have I done that! I learned to keep my mouth shut on that subject. To me thats just common sense to not comment on a persons size. You wouldn't say something to an obese person would you?, so why say it to a woman you think might be pregnant.

i changed my tag to avoid any more discussions!

Why comment on a woman being pregnant? Um, because there is nothing wrong with a woman being pregnant. Being obese is a whole other issue. If someone is obese after giving birth to the point that people think you are still pregnant and you are sensitive to this then it is time to lose some weight. Mostly though, being obese or being pregnant are two entirely different looks.

I think that changing your tag was a smart move considering the issues that you brought up.

 

[ado121]

If someone is obese after giving birth to the point that people think you are still pregnant and you are sensitive to this then it is time to lose some weight.

actually i was at the gym when the comment was made 4 weeks after having my son. i was probably still swollen since it was only 4 weeks previous that i delivered at 10 pound 10 ounce baby! i don't choose to wear a tent when i am working out so my tighter workout wear probably made my post baby belly stick out. STILL totally inappropriate to comment to me, in my opinion. don't talk to me at all. im not at the gym to talk anyways!

we have differences of opinions. thats for sure. makes the world go round. i respect that.

 

[ado121]

since i started this thread, i would like to end it. going back to planning my wdw trip with my great family!

pregnant women don't always want to hear how huge they are. if you like that kind of thing, all the power to you. i don't. instead maybe comment on how glowing i am, or how wonderful it must be to feel the baby moving. or don't say anything.

and since this thread started with the question, is 4 kids considered a large family?, its been answered....4 isn't big. is some cases its not big enough!

thank you to all who provided their experiences. it really opened my eyes to how negative people can be (and some not even know it )

thank you to those that pm'd me too. children are blessings, no matter how you look at it.

 

[xipetotec]

Why comment on a woman being pregnant? Um, because there is nothing wrong with a woman being pregnant. Being obese is a whole other issue. If someone is obese after giving birth to the point that people think you are still pregnant and you are sensitive to this then it is time to lose some weight. Mostly though, being obese or being pregnant are two entirely different looks.

Well having had friends and acquaintances that have had people assume they were pregnant, I think it's safe to say you should *never* assume a person is pregnant unless you know for sure. "Being obese" doesn't mean people should make fun or assume you're pregnant....

 

[LSmith]

Well having had friends and acquaintances that have had people assume they were pregnant, I think it's safe to say you should *never* assume a person is pregnant unless you know for sure. "Being obese" doesn't mean people should make fun or assume you're pregnant....

I have no idea where you got the idea that I think anyone should make fun of some one who is obese nor did I say that you should assume that a person is pregnant. ????? Read my whole post.

 

[ado121]

Why comment on a woman being pregnant? Um, because there is nothing wrong with a woman being pregnant.

You are right. there is nothing wrong with a pregnant woman. but what makes you think its your right to say something to her about it. maybe she doesn't want to hear what you have to say about it. maybe she doens't care what you have to say about it. maybe shes sick of being talked to about it. pregnant women are people too. they aren't just pregnant women. some are wives, some are sisters, some are already mommys and even some are carrying those babies for others who can't themselves.

don't want to stir the pot as i have already said i would like this thread to end but i just needed to say that.

some people should just leave well enough alone.