tarheelmjfan
Proud Redhead
- Joined
- May 10, 2001
This was on the front page, & peaked my interest, so I just had to read it. I've been married 14 yrs. & can tell you that your wedding day should be very special. Hopefully, the rest of your life with your spouse will be just as special. It appears that many people who are in the planning stages for their wedding are putting way too much significance on that one day. The thought that it's your day & you will do exactly what you want no matter what anyone else says may result in you spending the rest of your life with very few friends & only your spouse to talk to. Sorry, but an "all about me" attitude isn't attractive on anyone. By all means do what you want, but realize your actions have consequenses even on your wedding day.
Sadly, if the marriage has problems the "big" day will soon fade in your memory. A sure way to cause problems in a marriage is to get on the wrong side of your inlaws. Like it or not, boys love their moms. Most of them aren't going to defend you against her, especially if you're not there at the time. They're more likely telling you one thing, & their mom something different in an effort to keep the peace.
All parents are different, but if I were invited to my nieces, best friend's, sister's, etc., wedding & my son wasn't invited, I wouldn't go. (My DS is actually a teenager now, but I would have felt that way when he was younger.) I probably wouldn't show up, when she had a child either. Nor would I be buying her Christmas gifts. In other words, that one action could strain a relationship for life. Parents love their children more than anyone, no exceptions.
I don't mean to come down on anyone, but have read quite a few posts on this board over time. I wish all of you the best, & hope you all have long, happy marriages. Just don't put so much emphasis on the wedding that you lose sight of what's really important. Concentrate on the marriage & having a wonderful life together.
Sadly, if the marriage has problems the "big" day will soon fade in your memory. A sure way to cause problems in a marriage is to get on the wrong side of your inlaws. Like it or not, boys love their moms. Most of them aren't going to defend you against her, especially if you're not there at the time. They're more likely telling you one thing, & their mom something different in an effort to keep the peace.
All parents are different, but if I were invited to my nieces, best friend's, sister's, etc., wedding & my son wasn't invited, I wouldn't go. (My DS is actually a teenager now, but I would have felt that way when he was younger.) I probably wouldn't show up, when she had a child either. Nor would I be buying her Christmas gifts. In other words, that one action could strain a relationship for life. Parents love their children more than anyone, no exceptions.
I don't mean to come down on anyone, but have read quite a few posts on this board over time. I wish all of you the best, & hope you all have long, happy marriages. Just don't put so much emphasis on the wedding that you lose sight of what's really important. Concentrate on the marriage & having a wonderful life together.