need vs want

[abmitch01]

soma PJs, hmmm. I keep finding new things to buy on here, lol

 

[ruadisneyfan2]

soma PJs, hmmm. I keep finding new things to buy on here, lol

Sometimes we're not such a good influence on people.

 

[IceSkatingPrincess]

I'm working on wants vs needs lately.

I have a thing with picking up "just one little thing extra" whenever I go out. I'm starting to work on not getting anything, going home and sleeping on it for a few days. Most of the time I forget all about it, other times I realize I really don't want it all that badly. We also don't have fancy new cars and don't really make big ticket purchases. I want these things, but the money is better off being put in savings or towards my school loans. It's hard but I am hoping differing want from need will become a habit.

 

[ruadisneyfan2]

It's easy to convince oneself that a want is a need.
Dh has been working so much extra since December. The extra $ is great but he really needs a break. What I want for that break is to send the kids with my parents for 2 nights and go here. They have so many beautiful rooms I'm having a hard time narrowing my choice down to one.
Yes, we could find a cheap motel somewhere else but that wouldn't be very special or memorable.

 

[mello]

I seem to struggle with clothes the most. Technically, clothes are a necessity, but after a certain point, they're really more of a want. I hate shopping for clothes for me, and usually wait until I absolutely need things, then try to get a few of whatever I find that I like, all at once. Like if I find jeans that fit well and are comfy, I'll buy 2 or 3 pair so I don't have to go looking for more. Then I'll feel like I spent too much. On the other hand, I love shopping for clothes for my daughter, and tend to buy her too many all the time!

 

[abmitch01]

I work for hospice and we have a sister hospice in Africa. Every year about ten employees go over to help out. I should go. I think my my needs list would get very short.

 

[Colleen27]

I don't set the bar for my life at mere survival so the food/water/shelter definition of needs is inadequate, in my opinion. I've always been more oriented towards experiences over material possessions, and my growing intolerance of clutter as I age has all but broken me of my last material spending habit (books - I now make very heavy use of the library for both hardcopy and e-books, but seldom purchase any). But I have a very hard time thinking of valuable and exciting experiences as wants.

Travel (not merely vacation/time off) is my biggie. On a simplistic level I know that it is clearly a "want" - people can and do survive whole lifetimes without venturing out of their own city or state - but on a more abstract level I see it as a "need" for developing a deeper understanding of the world as a whole.

The other one I struggle with is opportunities for the kids, and that is on much the same basis. They don't "need" sports and camps and museum memberships and enrichment activities, but I feel like those things are an integral part of raising a well-rounded child so I have a hard time categorizing them strictly as "wants" when it comes to the budget. DS doesn't need band camp, older DD doesn't need 4H challenge trips, younger DD doesn't need day camp at the nature center, the girls don't need private school, DS doesn't need to play football. But all those things contribute so much to the people the children are growing up to be that I have a hard time looking at them as wants when asking myself if we can afford or commit to a particular activity.

 

[ruadisneyfan2]

I work for hospice and we have a sister hospice in Africa. Every year about ten employees go over to help out. I should go. I think my my needs list would get very short.

So true. My ds17 doesn't ask for much and is very interested in worldwide human rights, how other countries live, etc. Sometimes I think he doesn't "need" much because he's aware how good he has it here.

Just wanted to say as a regular blood donor, if you're a donor, you may not be able to after returning from Africa. That is one of the questions on their survey.
I know it used to be once you visit Haiti you could never donate again but this was way back and the rules keep changing. I haven't looked into it specifically because I have no plans to visit either of those places.
Dh also donates but would like to visit Costa Rica. We would not be able to donate for a year if we do go.
Just saying in case it matters to you.

 

[NancyIL]

I don't set the bar for my life at mere survival so the food/water/shelter definition of needs is inadequate, in my opinion. I've always been more oriented towards experiences over material possessions, and my growing intolerance of clutter as I age has all but broken me of my last material spending habit (books - I now make very heavy use of the library for both hardcopy and e-books, but seldom purchase any). But I have a very hard time thinking of valuable and exciting experiences as wants.

Travel (not merely vacation/time off) is my biggie. On a simplistic level I know that it is clearly a "want" - people can and do survive whole lifetimes without venturing out of their own city or state - but on a more abstract level I see it as a "need" for developing a deeper understanding of the world as a whole.

I think we are twins separated at birth! I am trying to get rid of the clutter at my house, and it will be especially hard to part with many of my books.

I LOVE to travel, and I agree wholeheartedly with Rick Steves' travel philosophy: http://www.ricksteves.com/press-room/ricks-travel-philosophy. I rarely pay for luxury travel, although we have stayed in some luxurious hotel rooms for free when using hotel points. After sleeping in hostels and a tent on a recent trip to New Zealand and Tasmania - even the smallest hotel room or cruise ship cabin is luxurious by comparison!

Someone on this board posted a link to the Mr. Money Mustache web site (about retiring early), and for that I am very grateful: http://www.mrmoneymustache.com/

 

[NancyIL]

I work for hospice and we have a sister hospice in Africa. Every year about ten employees go over to help out. I should go. I think my my needs list would get very short.

You are so right! Nothing screams excessive consumption to me like a visit to the mall - especially at holiday time.

 

[JanaDee]

With all due respect, the word "budget" implies establishing spending boundaries and adhering to them. It is not the same thing as "cheap", "inexpensive" or even "affordable". If someone is able to spend $6K on a vacation, then that's their business. We can help by suggesting the best ways to stay within that limit while getting everything they expect from a vacation and possibly more.

 

[JanaDee]

Sometimes "need" and "want" overlap.

I need a bag to carry my wallet, phone and misc things when I'm out and about. I want a $350 Michael Kors bag. How I fill that need and satisfy that want is entirely up to the budget that I have for handbags. I could spend 1/10th the price of the MK bag and get something that is functional, leaving me plenty of money to purchase more $35 handbags, or I can make myself happy and blow it all on that coveted MK bag.

I recently bought a MK bag and love it. Honestly, I've never been a purse girl, but this bag is gorgeous and will last me forever if I want to continue to use it that long.

I'm a total enabler when it comes to that kind of stuff. I don't think you'd regret it.

 

[Marionnette]

I recently bought a MK bag and love it. Honestly, I've never been a purse girl, but this bag is gorgeous and will last me forever if I want to continue to use it that long.

I'm a total enabler when it comes to that kind of stuff. I don't think you'd regret it.

Oh, I bought it months ago and I haven't had a moment of regret! I love the bag I got and I get many compliments on it.

 

[JanaDee]

Oh, I bought it months ago and I haven't had a moment of regret! I love the bag I got and I get many compliments on it.

 

[abmitch01]

ITA about enriching experiences for kids. Can I count Epcot as our international travel?

 

[kiramay]

This is an interesting thread. We struggle with need vs want with the kids lately. They want a lot of stuff they don't need, and I don't want them to become accustomed to getting whatever they want.

But my husband and I have gotten lax about ourselves. We have a small townhouse (all 3 kids share a room) that we paid off last year. We both drive older cars (14 and 9 years) that we paid cash for when we bought them. Those needs are no longer in the budget. We have no school loans. So if I want a new purse, I'm going to buy a new purse. One, not a bunch. If I want to eat out, I will, but not all the time. Do I need to do 6 triathlons this year? No, but I want to.

In a few years we'll be moving and will have a mortgage again so the extra money to spend on all our wants will diminish, but we'll still budget in our vacations and other things we don't necessarily need to survive, but that make life more enjoyable (like good face cream).

I refuse to feel guilty about meeting my wants as long as our needs are met first.

 

[NancyIL]

ITA about enriching experiences for kids. Can I count Epcot as our international travel?

No - take your kids to the real places!

 

[abmitch01]

I was joking. I'm hoping when DD is older, maybe college aged, to try somewhere in Europe. We live only a few hours from Montreal so we can do that sometime. Her orchestra goes to China once during the high school years, that will be exciting for her

 

[ruadisneyfan2]

No - take your kids to the real places!

 

[DawnM]

The best thing I can suggest is to come up with a total budget......then spend within that budget.

Does a bagallini fit in that budget? Will you need to not buy something else in order to get it? How bad do you want it?

It is a matter of priorities and not an argument of need vs. want for me.

Dawn