Need someone to talk to

[luv4u859]

Whoa. First of all, if anything I said specifically made you feel terrible, I am sorry. That truly was not my intent.

I find it offensive that you seem to be implying that people who are medicated are sociopaths. I am not speaking for anybody else, but the only reason I brought up medication (and talking to someone) is because it helped ME when I was going through some issues. I don't consider myself crazy, bipolar, or a sociopath and I will willingly admit that I took medication AND spoke with someone. And you know what, it really really helped me. I understand that you are upset and hurting and so you are getting defensive.. but before you talk about how everyone on here is terrible, you should try to be a little more sensitive yourself about the things you are saying.

I think most people posting had good intentions. I did not take most posts as being mean or hurtful. Most likely, people can relate to the situation and were relaying to you things that may have helped them overcome the same thing.

You're the one asking for help, so I think that could be a reason why most people were suggesting things YOU could do to help your situation. We are only talking to you and we only "know" you, so that is where our focus is. And yes, it does take 2 people to make any relationship, but we are only talking to ONE of those people right now, so that is why you are the focus.

Anyway. It is clear that I am only offending you, even when I am trying to help, so I guess I will just say.. Good luck to you. I hope that you can get it figured out. I think you have the tools you need, you just have to implement them. I wish you the best.

I only said the social path comment because someone suggested I was bipolar.

And exactly what you said, that is what I was trying to get across. I am only ONE person in the hole thing, no one knows how people treat me so it shouldn't be all fingers pointed at me unless you know both sides.

I'm sorry, I know I quoted you but I didn't mean you personally. I am sorry if I offended you.

 

[luv4u859]

Ah I said I was done posting but I also just wanted to say that I think you should do the Color Run even if you don't have a friend to do it with. They are an absolute BLAST. I went with some people from work last year but we got split up (different running paces) and I ended up meeting and hanging out with some other awesome people. It was seriously one of the most fun days I have had in quite a while. Don't miss out on it!!

Yeah I am, one of my friends said she'll do it with me. I am really excited about it. Going to sign up as soon as my check direct deposits lol

 

[luv4u859]

First of all, I believe you meant sociopath-and just to let you know, not everyone who is on medication is a sociopath. I needed medication after I gave birth because I was seriously depressed and I don't think I would qualify as a sociopath. That was a pretty hurtful statement, and I find that ironic considering you are talking about everyone hurting your feelings.

No, you are right it is not always YOU. But, you know, sometimes it is. I had to admit to myself that I was depressed and DO something about it. That is what you need to do, as well.

If you don't like your life, do something about it.

Get some professional help, really. It helps to talk to someone. It really does.

Cut off the friends that are toxic, end the drama.

Find the positive, good things in your life-focus on those and go forward.

Find things that interest you and do them. You have asked people what you should do, but you really need to decide what interests you and go with it. If the color run is something you like-go for it. And, if you can't find a friend to do it with you, go by yourself. And, if you like to go to Universal, go there by yourself, too.

It is okay to be by yourself. I think in our world being alone is considered a bad thing, but it really isn't. It is a great thing to learn to like being by yourself, to enjoy that time.

I don't think anyone here has been hurtful, and I think a lot of people have tried to help.

But, people can only help if you want it, and I really don't know if you want that right now...

I don't have a problem being alone, sometimes I enjoy it. It's just I am an only child and as a child I was always alone playing, I love when I have a big group of people, it's so much fun to me. I did not mean to offend you, I only said it because someone mentioned bipolar. I'm not happy and sad the next moment.

This is a really big deal to me, idk I guess because I think of the future a lot, I think one day I want to get married and will have no friends to be in my wedding or come to the wedding. Or I think about when I have a baby, I won't have that close friend who I want my child's god parent to be, that's the moments I get upset about it. It will probably be years from now but that's how I feel. I am in the process of trying to buy a house as well and I am scared to plan another house warming because I feel that no one will come.

It really hurts to feel like you have no one to talk to...

 

[Offsides]

Yeah I am, one of my friends said she'll do it with me. I am really excited about it. Going to sign up as soon as my check direct deposits lol

Awesome. They're so much fun. Have a blast!

 

[LiveYourLife]

You are 100% correct, we are only getting one side of the situation, which is your side. I don't know you from Adam, and just by reading your agressive responses to those who don't agree with you, it appears as if you have a very short fuse. Maybe your friends feel like they are walking on eggshells around you. You are being perceived here as the type of friend that most consider exhausting. Perception is very much reality in the world today.

I did see that you have found a class at Michael's, and are going to do the Color Run, that is fantastic news, and I hope you enjoy them and are able to make new friends!

Best of luck to you, Meka.

 

[Mkrop]

help, advice, in a nice way. I did not come here for people to tell me i needed to be freaking medicated. I am not a social path, I do not need that. I did not come here to say its all your fault you have no one, yeah like everyone else i am sure I have done things to make people mad at me, who doesn't? I will be the first one to admit it, but it is not ALWAYS my fault. I did not come here for people to make me feel worse than I already do. I have been through a lot in my life and I probably do need to go to counseling, I will admit that, but that does not mean I am bipolar or crazy because of it and I am no where near selfish. Its crazy how everyone around me says I am a good person, but you all. I am a terrible person according to everyone here.

That is why I lashed out. It was way to much. I did not want to hear people pointing the finger, "YOU, YOU YOU!!!!!" when it is not always me.

That is one thing people on this thread do not realize. Your post made me feel TERRIBLE about myself, like I am a ****ty person when I am not. Of course I am going to be defensive if people are telling me, YOU have issues, YOU need help, YOU have no friends because of YOU, when it is not always me.

You really need to take a step back and reread this post. This was uncalled for. People here have given many helpful suggestions. And because they dont "know" you they should consider other possibilities...BUT that is no reason to go off on them bc you dont see yourself that way. Take some time for self refelction too, that is what everyone is telling you to do. Sometime there are things that we are doing that push people away, and sometimes they are the toxic ones, it could be a combo of both. Only you know that...and YOU put this thread out there, you need to take the good and the bad posts. But so far I saw nothing to set you off like that.

Good luck with the cake class and Color Run

 

[Disney Doll]

No because even when I looked up people who had the same problem, they are 3 years in and still have pain. People just need to listen to me when I say things. I know what I am talking about. I am lucky I got away with only one screw. It is just the type of injury I have, no seeing another doctor will change it. Not all orthopedics will even touch the type of injury I had. When I first saw my doctor he told me he does not like these because they are so bad. Also when I went to the ER the night of the accident, they told me "minor" break, when I went to the doctors he said its not minor and that many ER doctors don't know that it is very severe. Look it up lisfranc injury.

I do like to cook. Over the summer I was looking for classes at michaels or ac Moore to learn to make different things. I would love to do that, right now it's tough tho because I work all day and that's when there classes are.

I am listening to you and what I am hearing is someone who is choosing to remain in the situation she is in.

I have been a nurse for 30 years. Trust me when I tell you that in 90% of the medical cases I have encountered throughout 30 years of nursing, that there is AWAYS something else that can be done or there is ALWAYS another MD who might have a different "approach" on how to look at a medical problem and perhaps help improve it.

I'll sign off the thread now because if you choose not to help yourself, then no one here is going to be able to help you.
I hope you seek professional counselling to work on yourself.
I believe that when you do that, many other areas of your life will fall into place.

I wish you well.

 

[luv4u859]

You really need to take a step back and reread this post. This was uncalled for. People here have given many helpful suggestions. And because they dont "know" you they should consider other possibilities...BUT that is no reason to go off on them bc you dont see yourself that way. Take some time for self refelction too, that is what everyone is telling you to do. Sometime there are things that we are doing that push people away, and sometimes they are the toxic ones, it could be a combo of both. Only you know that...and YOU put this thread out there, you need to take the good and the bad posts. But so far I saw nothing to set you off like that.

Good luck with the cake class and Color Run

why was it uncalled for? that is how people made me feel. I do not have a short fuse but when I feel people are attacking me and pointing fingers yeah I am going to get defensive. I said this so many times and people are not seeing that. Yeah maybe to YOU there was nothing said to make me upset, but to me there was. It was not about you as a person, it was about me. I have a right to feel the way I do. Everyone's emotions are different.

 

[NHdisneylover]

why was it uncalled for? that is how people made me feel. I do not have a short fuse but when I feel people are attacking me and pointing fingers yeah I am going to get defensive. I said this so many times and people are not seeing that. Yeah maybe to YOU there was nothing said to make me upset, but to me there was. It was not about you as a person, it was about me. I have a right to feel the way I do. Everyone's emotions are different.

And,that, right there is your issue. How often in your life are you taking things that your friends do that are not meant to be hurtful and being hurt by them anyway and then getting mean and defensive and lashing out at people who are trying to be friendly because of your different interpretation?

Do you not see how this could be off putting and could be seen as selfish?

You are correct that you have every right to fell however it is that you are feeling; however that does not give you a right to expect people to want to befriends with you if you lash out at them for doing or saying things which the majority of people would not see as rude or mean.

 

[Mkrop]

why was it uncalled for? that is how people made me feel. I do not have a short fuse but when I feel people are attacking me and pointing fingers yeah I am going to get defensive. I said this so many times and people are not seeing that. Yeah maybe to YOU there was nothing said to make me upset, but to me there was. It was not about you as a person, it was about me. I have a right to feel the way I do. Everyone's emotions are different.

Bc people are trying to help you on a thread YOU started! You have a right to your feelings, but you should think twice about lashing out. You shouldnt flip out on people who are trying to help...it is counterproductive.

I am sorry you cant see that.

Best of luck

 

[A&M's Mommy]

Why are you all even wasting your time? It is clear the OP is only interested in hearing what she wants to hear. No constructive criticism is accepted. She is belligerent, combative, and is picking fights with anyone trying to help her.

So I ask again: why are you wasting your time?

 

[LiveYourLife]

Wasted keystrokes and energy here, people. All of your very helpful advice is falling on deaf ears of someone who is so blind to their own personal issues that they only project blame on to others.

Run like the wind and let this thread die.

 

[LiveYourLife]

Why are you all even wasting your time? It is clear the OP is only interested in hearing what she wants to hear. No constructive criticism is accepted. She is belligerent, combative, and is picking fights with anyone trying to help her.

So I ask again: why are you wasting your time?

Lol! JINX! We were posting the same thing at the same time!

 

[crashbb]

Wasted keystrokes and energy here, people. All of your very helpful advice is falling on deaf ears of someone who is so blind to their own personal issues that they only project blame on to others.

Run like the wind and let this thread die.

Sometimes people reading the thread (who may not be posting) can gain something from the things posted, even if the OP is being obstinate, so it isn't' wasted keystrokes or energy. Or, that's what I tell myself.

 

[Allison]

Why are you all even wasting your time? It is clear the OP is only interested in hearing what she wants to hear. No constructive criticism is accepted. She is belligerent, combative, and is picking fights with anyone trying to help her.

So I ask again: why are you wasting your time?

I have to agree. People have really been patient and offered feedback but it's not going anywhere. Maybe the OP can let this sit for awhile and then go back and reflect on how she has interacted with people here. It would help her see why she has problems in the real world. However, I am not optomistic that will happen.

 

[LiveYourLife]

Sometimes people reading the thread (who may not be posting) can gain something from the things posted, even if the OP is being obstinate, so it isn't' wasted keystrokes or energy. Or, that's what I tell myself.

I agree with you 100%!!! There has been some really good advice suggested on this thread, but when it gets to page 11 of arguing on the part of the OP with responses that have to have her ****ing out her words, it becomes a waste of time and energy for people to continue to engage. At this point is anyone really helping her? No, because each post results in a ****ing laden response and to me she is just looking to argue and rile people up at this point.

Remember Baby Henry from Canada people!!!!

 

[lovemygoofy]

OP, stop and read what I'm writing and stop and read it again. And just think about what I am saying. You don't even have to comment.

I move alot. I understand how difficult it is to make friends and it is a hassle to find new friends. You are in a different stage of your life. Your old friends have started their new lives and you have a different life as well. You have a friend with children and sometimes it will require you to do the kiddy things to see those friends and keep those friends because frankly their life is just different from yours. Think about your friends past or current and where your lives are right now.

People are not going to fall out of the sky to be your friend. They are not going to run to you on the sidewalk and shout they want to be BFFs. It takes time and it takes having a good attitude about everything and most of all it takes effort. You want to take a cake decortaing class and that's great. Understand that alot of the people will probably be moms or married and have different ideas of what fun is.

You are going to school, right? What is wrong with the students in your class? Right away you have something in common if you are in a class together. That is a great ice breaker to comment on a teacher or a homework assignment. What about other students not even in your class? Are there functions on campus that interest you? It could be related to your field of study or something that interest you. It might not always fit your schedule but maybe rearrange.

You are young single and looking to have fun. Right now you need to find those kind of friends as well. Don't be afraid to go out by yourself to bars or movies or dinner on a patio. It will give you confidence. If you are somewhat shy, there are some great books for introverts on how to overcome or compensate for it.

There will always be reasons why friendships don't stick in there. And maybe it's not a friendship in your mind if you can't hang out and do this that or the other. Figure out what kind of friends you are looking for right now.

My BFF lives 1100 miles away and we talk/text maybe once a month. She has children and lives the homestyle life. I'm an army wife and move and have no children. I would go to the gates of hell for her and she would with me because in the end we love each other and accept the others life for what it is.

Figure out where you are in life and what friends do you need right now to make you happy.

 

[NHdisneylover]

Why are you all even wasting your time? It is clear the OP is only interested in hearing what she wants to hear. No constructive criticism is accepted. She is belligerent, combative, and is picking fights with anyone trying to help her.

So I ask again: why are you wasting your time?

I keep asking myself that But, I keep getting suckered in

 

[wishesuponastar]

I keep asking myself that But, I keep getting suckered in

me too! But I do have to agree that maybe this thread is helping someone else see something that can help them.

 

[A&M's Mommy]

I keep asking myself that But, I keep getting suckered in

After I posted that I realized it is because you all are good people who are trying to help the OP. Unfortunately, the OP doesn't appear to want to help herself.