Need some delicate parental advice!!

[CEDmom]

I wouldn't tell him. I think he's young enough to continue believing for a few years and I don't think as parents we need to be the ones to burst that bubble. He'll figure it out in his own way at his own pace. When he confronts you just say that you still believe in the magic of the holidays.

 

[FreshTressa]

We never did easter bunny, santa, TF.

I'm not good with secrets.

 

[DawnCt1]

I never understood why letting a child be a child and enjoy the fantasies that come with Easter, Christmas, etc is considered "lying". We have 4 DSs and we never told them that Santa didn't exist, nor the Easter Bunny. In fact, when they asked, we told them that if they didn't believe in Santa, or the Easter Bunny, Santa or the Easter Bunny wouldn't believe in them. The youngest is 18 and, the oldest is 27, yet when they have a request for Christmas, we still say; "Ask Santa". Now I don't know, and I may be guessing, but I think when they have kids of their own, they will know that they had better go shopping!

 

[lindalinda]

Dont tell him...part of growing up is figuring these things out. Its part of the learning process. At some point he might even "pretend" to believe to protect your feelings. This will warm your heart..believe me.

 

[FreshTressa]

When I was a little kid...here is how I thought...

If a fat man in a bright red suit can get in my chimney, what's stopping a robber?

If a fairy can come steal my teeth, can't a demon come steal my soul?

If a rabbit can mutate into a giant creature that roams my house at night...what other kind of weird monster/human creatures are out there.

Then, when I found out my mom was making it up, I fretted for months about all the things she might have been making up.

But...I always have been a bit odd

I think it is fine if you want to share the magic with your kids and keep it going as long as possible.

I just couldn't do it to my kids after the bad experience I had.

 

[Disneyrsh]

Seriously, how can you go to Disneyworld/Land, look at a dude in a Tigger suit, yell "There's Tigger!" to your kid, and consider it to be lying if you told them about Santa?!

There's lying and then there's fantasy. I pity the kid who doesn't know the difference...

 

[tink&cinderella]

My dd is turning 8 in July. She too believes the easter bunny, Santa etc and everything at Disney is real.

I have told her that as long as she believes in Santa and the Easter Bunny they will come. When she stops believing they no longer come. She seems to accept this.

She has started asking questions about the zippered suits she has noticed at WDW - she believes that even Tigger and Piglet need to "change their clothes".

I don't plan to tell her anything until she asks me directly and/or figures it out herself.

She also believes that Mom plans the trips on the Disney cruise ship strategically and that the characters are on a schedule - some weeks they are on the cruise and some weeks they are at Disney

So far, so good

 

[Snow Brite]

I have never had this conversation. I must be lucky. I love playing Santa and Easter Bunny and the Tooth Fairy. But my 11 year old and my almost 9 year old obviously know they are me, but they have never really asked me about it. I think they believe that if they let on they "know" it will stop for them. We do make it a point to "play Santa" often in our daily lives however. I always anonymously leave gifts and dinner on a needy family we knows doorstop each Christmas and Easter, we take Valentines and Easter cookies to the shut ins from church, and other things like this. I think my kids realize that Santa and the Easter Bunny are just an extension of this.

 

[Stacey2grls]

Why do you feel the need to tell him? He is still very young, and most kids around that age start questioning, curiousity is a very normal thing. In my opinion, and I know alot of kids this age, you can probably get away with a couple of more years with him still believing.

 

[Karel]

If a fairy can come steal my teeth, can't a demon come steal my soul?

If a rabbit can mutate into a giant creature that roams my house at night...what other kind of weird monster/human creatures are out there.
.

That's very sad. Fantasy - fun, magical fantasy - should be a part of every child's life. Not worrying about demons and souls. You could make it fun for your children.

My 12 year old left a letter for the Easter Bunny. Does she believe still? Probably not but it's still fun to make believe.

 

[goofy's friends]

My DD9 figured it out this Easter i was so sad--she even said Mommy how come you look like your going to cry? I just said cuz you're growing up too fast. Hmmmm........ I wasn't going to say anything, even though I could tell she knew, but I was afraid her comments would end up ruining it for little brother and sister. so, I said Is there something you need to ask me about the Easter Bunny? She blurted out "He's not real and riendeer cant fly!!!" It was eating her up inside!! Know your kid and whether or not they want to talk about it. My DD7 will keep pretending forever probably, but DD9 is a realist and needed to say what she knew to be true. She is not emotionally harmed, either---did not feel betrayed and got to help set out eggs late at night, which she thought was a blast.

 

[petrymom]

goofy's friend - My DS age 11 found out yesterday too. It's is me who is mourning. I busted myself. On Saturday night I was dumping the extra candy into a dish for family candy and he walked out of his room. I thought he was sleeping. I know just how you feel.

To those of you who THINK your child knows the truth, I thought a long time ago that he knew it was us. After yesterday, I truly believe that he believed all along. When he asked me about santa, I told him that Santa is in his heart and that is all he needs to feel. He asked me all day long, "so you bought me the TV? How about the radio, you too? Huge revelation for me.

I do not regret SANTA and the gang. It is such an positive feeling to watch your kids enjoy it. In a sense, I am glad he found out now. Soon he will be in middle school and believing in Santa would be VERY uncool, but I feel like I am missing some of his innocence of childhood. My first baby is growing up.

 

[paigevz]

I never understood why letting a child be a child and enjoy the fantasies that come with Easter, Christmas, etc is considered "lying". We have 4 DSs and we never told them that Santa didn't exist, nor the Easter Bunny. In fact, when they asked, we told them that if they didn't believe in Santa, or the Easter Bunny, Santa or the Easter Bunny wouldn't believe in them. The youngest is 18 and, the oldest is 27, yet when they have a request for Christmas, we still say; "Ask Santa". Now I don't know, and I may be guessing, but I think when they have kids of their own, they will know that they had better go shopping!

Same here. My parents said when you stop believing, you stop getting. So we never "stopped believing", and we got presents from Santa under the tree until our own kids were born!

My DS knows. I suspected he knew last Christmas, and he did ask..........I just turned it around, "What do YOU think?" I could see he was wrestling with it, but he said, "I WANT it to be true". I said, "Well, let it be, then." He caught me as the tooth fairy, and I covered, and he pretended not to notice. After yesterday, we know he knows for sure now, just by the way he acted..............but he just smiles when we mention the Easter Bunny. He's pretending too, just like I did when I found out. That's what helps keep the magic alive. He knows, he knows I know he knows, and he keeps up the ruse to keep up the fun.

Since I grew up that way, I really enjoy that.

Since you brought up the making fun of, part...........just realize, you can't protect him from that. If they don't make fun of that belief, likely they'll make fun of something else.................and maybe something he can do nothing about, like his appearance or skills.................if it's a belief you can at least discuss it with him, and then you can do the "spirit" talk.

 

[goofy's friends]

To Petrymom,

 

[Stacerita]

If you believe you receive.

 

[shortbun]

He's young. His friends will not make fun of him. Wait another year at least. Some child will bring it up but you can discuss it then and maybe even ease him in to it then. Why be in such a hurry to move thru childhood?

 

[shortbun]

When I was a little kid...here is how I thought...

If a fat man in a bright red suit can get in my chimney, what's stopping a robber?

If a fairy can come steal my teeth, can't a demon come steal my soul?

If a rabbit can mutate into a giant creature that roams my house at night...what other kind of weird monster/human creatures are out there.

Then, when I found out my mom was making it up, I fretted for months about all the things she might have been making up.

But...I always have been a bit odd

I think it is fine if you want to share the magic with your kids and keep it going as long as possible.

I just couldn't do it to my kids after the bad experience I had.[/QUOTE


I think your experience is rare and a bit odd, indeed. I don't dispute it but it's the only such childhood paranoia I have ever heard of. I'm so sorry! Do you still worry so? I wish you all good things!

 

[FreshTressa]

shortbun!!!

I haven't seen you around in a while. I've missed you!

And no, I don't worry like that anymore, but I am overly analytical (as are my children). I could never just 'believe' in that magical way.

Maybe it is sad, but that is how we are!!! Guess we aren't much fun, hehe.

 

[mamacatnv]

I fessed up to my son this past Saturday night, it was horrible and traumatic and think I am going to be scarred for life. He on the other hand, let me know very gently that he had know about the EB for a couple of years. Much to my relief, he did affirm our unshakable belief in Santa.

DD age 7 is just starting to ask questions. Yes, I believe it is because some kid at school, whose parents felt they were doing them a favor in "not lying", has been trying to convince the rest of their classmates that they are all full of it and that it has been a scam their whole lives. I truly think they want to continue to believe and want us to reassure them.

IF DH and I ever have a baby together, we are not doing the Easter Bunny, Santa, Tooth fairy thing...I don't want to have to worry about hurting my child over such things.

How sad to not have some of the make believe magic of child hood, instead to give them knowledge that they will then share with their classmates who may tease and ridicule them.

We all need a little bit of magic, even if as we get older Mom and Dad take a more active role in that Magic.

 

[Free4Life11]

I'd just come out and tell him. I never really believed. And to be honest as a parent I wouldn't want some imaginary character to get all the credit when I'm the one buying the stuff!