My teenage daughter is getting on my nerves about dyeing her hair!

[rcpae]

I have a 17 year old daughter that wants to dye her hair DARK. Her natural hair color is a dirty blonde. For the last 7 months or so she has had her hair highlighted and it has looked nice. The last time she had her hair highlighted they put in way too many highlights so now she is getting roots.

She came home from school and has decided that she wants to use a semi-permanent dye and go DARK. I am fine with her having darker hair...but the color she wants is DARK.

I am tempted to let her, on her own dime. I have a feeling that she will hate it but with it being so much darker I'm not sure how she would get it out. The bottle says it will last about a month. Having used this previously I know two things. It will last at least a month and the color on the box is lighter than what your hair will look like. Of course, Mom knows nothing.

I don't want to be too controlling, but I'm also not paying one penny to fix any hair mess and she certainly can only afford the one bottle of dye. I have paid for her hair stuff everytime but I'm not wanting to fund a disaster.

 

[Mermaid02]

I have a 17 year old daughter that wants to dye her hair DARK. Her natural hair color is a dirty blonde. For the last 7 months or so she has had her hair highlighted and it has looked nice. The last time she had her hair highlighted they put in way too many highlights so now she is getting roots.

She came home from school and has decided that she wants to use a semi-permanent dye and go DARK. I am fine with her having darker hair...but the color she wants is DARK.

I am tempted to let her, on her own dime. I have a feeling that she will hate it but with it being so much darker I'm not sure how she would get it out. The bottle says it will last about a month. Having used this previously I know two things. It will last at least a month and the color on the box is lighter than what your hair will look like. Of course, Mom knows nothing.

I don't want to be too controlling, but I'm also not paying one penny to fix any hair mess and she certainly can only afford the one bottle of dye. I have paid for her hair stuff everytime but I'm not wanting to fund a disaster.

It's hair, it grows and it sounds like this is only a semi permanent color. Let her do it- making sure she understands that you won't be paying for a "fix" if she doesn't like it.

It's not a piercing or a tatoo.... feel lucky Mom!

 

[ilovejack02]

Dark has got to be better than a hot mess of hair that needs a root job isn't it?

Either pay for it or don't . I personally would pay for it, its only $10 if you are going the drug store route. If she hates it , she can wait a month or pony up the cash to fix it. Either way tell her if she hates it she is not allowed to whine about it in front of you constantly or there will be consequences.

 

[LIDisneyFan]

MIne did the same at 16YO-she decided her semi-perm color was too dark for her too, so after it lightened she has kept it darker than her natural blonde color but lighter than the original black

It looks very nice and we are used to it - it previous poster is right-be thankful it is only the hair!

 

[shortbun]

Get her some henna or take her to a salon. Why punish her because she wants dark hair? I don't get it.

 

[Magpie]

I have a 17 year old daughter that wants to dye her hair DARK. Her natural hair color is a dirty blonde. For the last 7 months or so she has had her hair highlighted and it has looked nice. The last time she had her hair highlighted they put in way too many highlights so now she is getting roots.

She came home from school and has decided that she wants to use a semi-permanent dye and go DARK. I am fine with her having darker hair...but the color she wants is DARK.

I am tempted to let her, on her own dime. I have a feeling that she will hate it but with it being so much darker I'm not sure how she would get it out. The bottle says it will last about a month. Having used this previously I know two things. It will last at least a month and the color on the box is lighter than what your hair will look like. Of course, Mom knows nothing.

I don't want to be too controlling, but I'm also not paying one penny to fix any hair mess and she certainly can only afford the one bottle of dye. I have paid for her hair stuff everytime but I'm not wanting to fund a disaster.

Meh. It's her hair, let her make a mess of it she likes. Maybe she'll enjoy the goth look!

But you're not under any obligation to pay for it! She can buy it herself, and then if she needs to fix it later, she can pay for that herself, too. I'm sure you can come up with some way for her to earn money, if she's broke.

 

[hereyago]

OP: let her do it. She can pay for it and then SHE will have to deal with how it turns out. There are so many "real" things that are worth arguing about, and dying hair isn't one of them

And if turns out to be a disaster, it will be HER disaster, let her learn from it.

 

[eliza61]

I don't want to be too controlling, but I'm also not paying one penny to fix any hair mess and she certainly can only afford the one bottle of dye. I have paid for her hair stuff everytime but I'm not wanting to fund a disaster.

LOL. I can sooo relate to your daughter. When I was growing up, we didn't get to buy clothes every time a new style came out so I became a hair coloring queen. I have always colored my hair to suit the changes in moods, seasons, occasions, direction the wind blows...LOL

Just this year I've been jet black (I'm a natural redish brown) to brown with gold streaks and this summer I plan on going back to light red.

I have had disasters ( I goofed on one color and it turned green. It actually turned out well in the end because I cut it super short and every one loved the look).

don't wig out (excuse the pun). the worst thing about using your hair as a canvas is that it gets expensive if you have it done professionally. other than that. if she hates it, it will grow out.

 

[palmtreegirl]

My hair stylist told me that when you use even a semi(washes out in 28 shampoos) when you go dark on light hair it won't just come out. If you want it back to your original color you will have to color it back or grow it out.

 

[Hannathy]

Who cares about hair?

My rule has always been I don't care what you do about hair just no tattoos or excessive piercings until you are 18.

Let's see my DD has had hot pink streaks, Hot pink all over, copper streaks, darker all over, and one blue chunk.

It grows. The hot pink all over was very cute and she got a lot of compliments on that one.

Heck you are only young once, if you can't have fun with your hair now when can you?

 

[Jennasis]

It's hair. It'll grow back no matter how funky it looks. PLUS...

It's HER hair, not yours. even at 17 I can't figure out how you as her mom get to have ANY say in what she does with her hair IF she does it herself. You shouldn't have to pay for it if you don't want to, but you should have NO say in what she does with it.

 

[Darcy03231]

I'd be glad its just dark, and not blue, green, purple, pink, etc. (these are all colors my kids experimented with).

OP, there are lots of battles to fight with teens (I have 6 of them) and in my book, this isn't one of them. I'd let her do it, and if it doesn't turn out right I'd let her pay to fix it. If she's old enough to make the decision, she's old enough to suffer the consequences.

 

[Mrs. Charming]

I don't see the problem, either. I'd just have her buy 2 boxes because the color she'll get on lighter hair might not turn out initially... it might be greenish, greyish, or orangey.

I think it's the new "hot" thing to have darker hair. Brunette is the new blonde, I think. (Think Jersey Shore, Kardashians, etc.)

 

[rcpae]

I definately get a say, especially if she is expecting this to by funded by mom. What's truly funny is that I just told her, "Go for it if that is what you want to do, but you will need to pay for it."

She said, " I think I changed my mind because if I don't like it then I can't afford to get it fixed."

It's possible she just learned a big girl lesson. You have to be able to afford the upkeep on hair. Its not cheap.

 

[LuvLDM]

At 17 I think I would let her do whatever she wants w/ her hair.

 

[Conservative Hippie]

My mom is about as conservative as they come, and her rule was nothing permanent until I didn't live at home anymore. She let me do anything I wanted to my hair as long as it would eventually wash out - and I paid for it myself. I used to dye my hair purple with Kool-Aid all the time. Now as an adult I'm one of the very few women I know that does not dye her hair!

 

[scrapquitler]

I have a 17 year old daughter that wants to dye her hair DARK. Her natural hair color is a dirty blonde. For the last 7 months or so she has had her hair highlighted and it has looked nice. The last time she had her hair highlighted they put in way too many highlights so now she is getting roots.

She came home from school and has decided that she wants to use a semi-permanent dye and go DARK. I am fine with her having darker hair...but the color she wants is DARK.

I am tempted to let her, on her own dime. I have a feeling that she will hate it but with it being so much darker I'm not sure how she would get it out. The bottle says it will last about a month. Having used this previously I know two things. It will last at least a month and the color on the box is lighter than what your hair will look like. Of course, Mom knows nothing.

I don't want to be too controlling, but I'm also not paying one penny to fix any hair mess and she certainly can only afford the one bottle of dye. I have paid for her hair stuff everytime but I'm not wanting to fund a disaster.

I would let her do it. It's only hair. Even if it looks terrible, it will grow out or wash out eventually. She will either live with it or figure out how to fix it if she hates it. And if it's a disaster, maybe she'll listen to you next time

 

[ilovejack02]

I definately get a say, especially if she is expecting this to by funded by mom. What's truly funny is that I just told her, "Go for it if that is what you want to do, but you will need to pay for it."

She said, " I think I changed my mind because if I don't like it then I can't afford to get it fixed."

It's possible she just learned a big girl lesson. You have to be able to afford the upkeep on hair. Its not cheap.

Now that is a very good lesson to learn. I highlighted once or twice in college and once I couldn't afford to go back it wasn't pretty growing out lol.

So the only way you are willing to pay is if she goes with the color you want? It isn't like she is asking for hot pink and blue streaks. That is a tad controlling ,but it's your kid. I have been there done that my oldest is 21, hair was the least of my worries . Even the boys want to do crazy colors and let it be all shaggy. I let him do it, but had to listen to my inlaws complain constantly to me all the time. They stopped when I went Momma bear nuts on them HAHA. I was worried about grades, drugs, alcohol , college , girls , driving etc etc , not his freaking hair !!! ; )

 

[sunnyday123]

I'd let her do it, after I reminded her that coloring a dark color over light-colored hair can create all kinds of different colors-and not the one intended.

Be happy she's not coming home with her face pierced.

 

[sacall]

My 14 old dd, who has beautiful blond hair which her hairdresser told her "people pay big bucks to have hair your color", just dyed her hair strawberry blonde

She had been bugging me for awhile to do and I thought - her money, her hair, her problem So, I took her to buy the color and then helped her color her hair. It does look nice, not something I would do, but it's her hair. I did tell her if she didn't like, she had to wait for it to grow out or pay to get it recolored.

I say let her do it.

Stacy