my ds accidentally broke a boy's necklace on the bus, parent wants "restitution"

[ZPT1022]

WOW for once I can say ITA with GG ....

Several yrs ago a boy took DS's coat on the bus and threw it out the window. The school would not give me contact info so the mother could replace it. I was told they would handle all comunications. The mother refused to pay.
I found out later that the mother worked with a neighbor. The mother told the neighbor that she had already paid for 3 coats her son took, she wasn't paying for anymore.

Wow. So don't deal with your child who obviously has an issue, but let it keep going on so that other people suffer while you refuse to be responsible for your child's actions. I think that kid should have been not allowed bus transportation any more since it would punish both child and Mom. At some point you are responsible for how your kids act.

 

[brittsmum1998]

Thanks. My kids don't always think so. Tell ds7 and dd8 that, when they are stuck seated holding hands on the couch because they bickered too much.

Beth

I thought my Mom was the only one who did that and I'm 42. Best thing you could do....I still remember it to this day lol

Sorry, back to reg scheduled topic.

 

[sha_lyn]

Wow. So don't deal with your child who obviously has an issue, but let it keep going on so that other people suffer while you refuse to be responsible for your child's actions. I think that kid should have been not allowed bus transportation any more since it would punish both child and Mom. At some point you are responsible for how your kids act.

I didn't even finish the story because I was running late.
So the school talked to the boy who claimed it was an accident (I haven't figured out how you can accidentally keep throwing other kids coats out windows...LOL). I asked them what punishment they were giving, the principal claimed he didn't have authority since it happened on the bus, and that the driver had not opted to move the boy to the front. However if I was worried about DS, he could be moved to the front for the rest of the year.

I was livid. They wanted to punish DS for having his coat stollen.
Oh and luckily I had labeled the coat with our phone number. A man saw it on the side of the road and picked it up. However it had been ran over and the zipper was messed up. We did not have the $$ to run out and buy a coat right then (money was really tight back then). We had to wait a couple of weeks, so DS had to hold his coat closed when it was too cold to leave the front open.

 

[taximomfor4]

I thought my Mom was the only one who did that and I'm 42. Best thing you could do....I still remember it to this day lol

Sorry, back to reg scheduled topic.

Well, so far, did it once (about 2 yrs ago). Now the mere threat instantly stops them. Soon, I am sure, I will have to sit them there again. BTW, my mom did NOT do this. I actually made it up, out of desperation. It seemed very appropriate.

Beth

 

[poohandwendy]

Just wanted to tell a story of something that happened to me when I was in HS, still pisses me off.

During gym, we had use of the lockers but they were not assigned. Some people used locks, but most didn't. Well, a friend of mine couldn't find her tennis shoes (an extra pair) and was asking everyone if they had seen them. I told her that I thought I saw a pair that was similar to what she described sitting on the bench after my gym class.

Well, she goes back and they are gone. So, her mother calls my mom and starts complaining saying that even if I didn't steal them, I had a responsibility to turn them in and because they were gone, she felt I was responsible for the loss! (no, I didn't take them and I am not even certain they were my friends shoes and when i saw them I didn't know my friend was even missing shoes) Can you believe the audacity?!

The kicker here? My mother ended up paying her for them! Probably the most glaring example of injustice in my childhood, I was so upset about it because I felt it left the impression that I was admitting involvement and/or responsibility for the loss.

Just really upset me because it it called to question my integrity and bothered me that my mother didn't show any back bone. I mean...sheesh, I wasn't even sure if the shoes I saw were hers and she took no precautions to put them in a locker for safe keeping.

Of course, the friendship ended, but the worst part of it is that I lost a bit of respect for my mom because she rolled over and allowed this woman to bully her into paying for the shoes.

(the school was not involved at all)

This thread just reminded me of it.

 

[Sleepy]

Several yrs ago a boy took DS's coat on the bus and threw it out the window. The school would not give me contact info so the mother could replace it. I was told they would handle all comunications. The mother refused to pay.

I have one better than that. The same kid that broke my son's glasses also took my son's coat while on the bus from school. My son never saw him take the coat, but 2 days later, this boy came to school WEARING my son's coat. My son went to the principals office and told them he knew who had his coat. They were shocked that the child not only stole the coat, but his mother also knew he had it. The kid tried to say he saw the coat on the bus floor, it was dirty, so he wanted to take it home so his mother could wash it. If that were so, explain why a mom would send their 5 year old to school with NO coat....only wearing the coat she supposedly intended to just wash? I thought it was rather bold to have the child wear a stolen coat to school.

 

[ZPT1022]

I didn't even finish the story because I was running late.
So the school talked to the boy who claimed it was an accident (I haven't figured out how you can accidentally keep throwing other kids coats out windows...LOL). I asked them what punishment they were giving, the principal claimed he didn't have authority since it happened on the bus, and that the driver had not opted to move the boy to the front. However if I was worried about DS, he could be moved to the front for the rest of the year.

I was livid. They wanted to punish DS for having his coat stollen.
Oh and luckily I had labeled the coat with our phone number. A man saw it on the side of the road and picked it up. However it had been ran over and the zipper was messed up. We did not have the $$ to run out and buy a coat right then (money was really tight back then). We had to wait a couple of weeks, so DS had to hold his coat closed when it was too cold to leave the front open.

That's just ludicrous. Too late now but I'd have sent the bus company a bill for repairs since they obviously weren't monitoring this kid enough and he managed to do this not once but at least FOUR times. At the very least, even if they did not pay it, it would have brought the incident to their attention and forced them to do SOMETHING about it. Bus transport to school is a privilege not a right, at least that is how it was set up in the town I grew up in. I drive my DD to school because I do not want her on a bus, but I think it's the same thing here too. Just crazy

 

[sha_lyn]

I doubt it would have done any good. A couple of yrs later we had major complaints about a bus driver (same county but different ele school). The school even agreed with us, but said they couldn't do anything but talk to her. I called the supervisor numerous times (always went to voice mail)and never received a call back. Eventually I even gave my maiden name and reminded him that we are distant cousins. Never did hear from him.

 

[sha_lyn]

I have one better than that. The same kid that broke my son's glasses also took my son's coat while on the bus from school. My son never saw him take the coat, but 2 days later, this boy came to school WEARING my son's coat. My son went to the principals office and told them he knew who had his coat. They were shocked that the child not only stole the coat, but his mother also knew he had it. The kid tried to say he saw the coat on the bus floor, it was dirty, so he wanted to take it home so his mother could wash it. If that were so, explain why a mom would send their 5 year old to school with NO coat....only wearing the coat she supposedly intended to just wash? I thought it was rather bold to have the child wear a stolen coat to school.

reminds me of when DS was in preschool

They brought him out to the car pool in a pink coat that was 2-3 sizes too small. I asked why he had that coat on and not his. They told me that a girl insisted that DS's coat (apparently DS told them it was his coat when she put it on) was hers so they sent her home in it. The pink one was the only one left so the "knew" it was his

1 DS coat had his name in it

2 don't you think the mother would notice her DD wearing a coat that wasn't hers

We did get that coat back and in the condition it left us in