My buddy doesn't ( didn't? ) understand why I won't let my kids have text messaging.

[allison443]

OP I don't really get it- are you saying that you won't let your kids have texting in the future because some other kids send thousands of texts per month?

It's completely your decision, of course! Not every kid texts excessively though. Are you going to forbid it without giving your kids a chance to prove that they are responsible? All because of what these other kids did?

 

[Papa Deuce]

My 7 1/2 year old doesn't even know what texting is. I don't see that changing anytime soon.

I don't really think 8 year olds need phones either, but that's just me.

Me either, really. But we have an extra phone, and a family plan.. so, for safety, and only safety, they have one.

 

[Papa Deuce]

OP I don't really get it- are you saying that you won't let your kids have texting in the future because some other kids send thousands of texts per month?

It's completely your decision, of course! Not every kid texts excessively though. Are you going to forbid it without giving your kids a chance to prove that they are responsible? All because of what these other kids did?

Nope. I'm not going to let them have it because I feel that texting is causing a deterioration of real social skills, as well as leading kids to eventually suffer from developing quality business / life skills...

Kids don't TALK as much anymore. They text. They no longer use proper grammar or spell correctly, at least as well as they used to..... One of my friends is a HS principal in Kansas City and we have discussed this a few times - that kids turn in homework written the way that they text, and see nothing wrong with it.

 

[allison443]

Nope. I'm not going to let them have it because I feel that texting is causing a deterioration of real social skills, as well as leading kids to eventually suffer from developing quality business / life skills...

Kids don't TALK as much anymore. They text. They no longer use proper grammar or spell correctly, at least as well as they used to..... One of my friends is a HS principal in Kansas City and we have discussed this a few times - that kids turn in homework written the way that they text, and see nothing wrong with it.

Oh, I see now! The only thing you mentioned in the OP was that the excessive amount of messages might make your friend see why texting is a bad idea. But now I see you have other reasons.
I will say that my kids (who have texting) do not turn in homework/papers in text speak. They use proper grammar and spell correctly. In fact one is a grammar/spelling zealot. So again, these problems do not automatically arise if kids have texting.
But of course like I said it is your decision for your girls!

 

[Avalon_toon]

His kids were away at camp the last month. They had their phones with them.

Child #1 --- 14,800 texts in that month ( age 13 ) almost 530 tests a day!!!!

Child #2 --- 9,650 texts in that month ( age 10 ) 344 texts a day , based on 28 days of camp.

I must be totally naive, 'cause I don't even see how this is possible? 530 texts a day = one text every 1.8 minutes for 16 hours a day, every day?! Doesn't this kid need to eat, use the bathroom, etc., let alone go swimming, hiking, or whatever else they supposedly do at camp?

 

[mjkacmom]

Well, my 8 year old wants a cellphone, and I'm certainly not getting her one (because she's always with an adult), but I have no problem with texting, and we have unlimited. Dd13 and ds11 are not obsessed, and when I was their age, I spend at least 4 hours a day on the phone with my gf's. My kids don't spend nearly as much time texting as I did talking. Heck, my mom grew up without a phone, and yet she understood that times change, and during the late 70's/early 80's, tweens and teens spent hours on the phone, talking about nothing. Today's socialization involved texting - kids refuse to call each other. Texting is how they communicate, and if you don't text, you will miss out on social opportunites (since that's how they make plans).

 

[MrsPete]

Like most things, texting is a good thing in moderation.

My teenaged daughter receives texts about upcoming meetings, changes, etc. in the school's student council -- this is their method of communication. It's handy for the advisor/officers to send out one text that goes to every member. Since they have their phones with them all the time, they get the message very quickly; whereas, they might not check email 'til the evening.

It's also handy to be able to send her a message about something we're going to do after school. When she cuts her phone on at the end of the school day, there's the message waiting for her.

Also, if she's sitting in a meeting -- scouts, church youth group, student council -- to quietly send me a text saying, "Will be done in 15 minutes. Please come pick me up." Or I can text her and say, "How much longer?" In this circumstance, she can still pay attention to the meeting while sending me this message.


On the other hand, texting is really a problem during school. AND low-ability kids ARE starting to put text-lingo into their writing (good students don't have a problem grasping the idea that what's appropriate in a text isn't appropriate in an essay).

Parents shouldn't ban texting because of its problems; rather, they should enforce limits and moderation and help their kids use this method of communication for its strengths.

 

[mhsjax]

Nope. I'm not going to let them have it because I feel that texting is causing a deterioration of real social skills, as well as leading kids to eventually suffer from developing quality business / life skills...

Kids don't TALK as much anymore. They text. They no longer use proper grammar or spell correctly, at least as well as they used to..... One of my friends is a HS principal in Kansas City and we have discussed this a few times - that kids turn in homework written the way that they text, and see nothing wrong with it.

I dont get texting either. However, I see plenty of adults that have no concept of the English language and they don't text. Don't think we can blame texting on that. In most schools where I live grammer isn't even being taught like it was when I was in school. Spelling, well just ask my hubby (who has a genius IQ) to spell the months of the year, can't do it, so that is nothing new. Also here you sit typing on a computer to almost strangers you you probably have never seen and are asking advice. I bet alot of older people would think that this is crazy, I know my parents do. So I guess really I don't get your complaint. It isn't for you that's fine, but kids these days, that is how they communicate. I guess you don't send E-mails either, cause alot of people find that rude also, when you could pick up the phone and call. JMHO.

 

[NMAmy]

Nope. I'm not going to let them have it because I feel that texting is causing a deterioration of real social skills, as well as leading kids to eventually suffer from developing quality business / life skills...

Kids don't TALK as much anymore. They text. They no longer use proper grammar or spell correctly, at least as well as they used to..... One of my friends is a HS principal in Kansas City and we have discussed this a few times - that kids turn in homework written the way that they text, and see nothing wrong with it.

My dd is 18. She and her friends text all the time--she also sends text messages to me fairly often. I've found that it's much more convenient than a phone call for short, informational conversations. I'm in a room full of teens on a fairly regular basis and they talk every bit as much as I did when I was their age.

She's off to college in a week on scholarship. She and her friends certainly seem to know the differences between typing a paper for credit and typing a text message.

It's okay if you don't want your kids to have the text function on their phones now and in the future. But those are some pretty big generalizations about teens.

 

[diznygirl]

Here is a prime example. ( BTW, my kids share one phone that is only allowed to be used in an emergency so far - they are only 8. And there are only about 5 - 7 numbers programmed in, and they can only call those numbers ).....

OK, so my buddy and I go round and round about texting. He thinks I will cave in when my kids are old enough to text. I will not, and, as of today, maybe he will understand why:

His kids were away at camp the last month. They had their phones with them.

Child #1 --- 14,800 texts in that month ( age 13 ) almost 530 tests a day!!!!

Child #2 --- 9,650 texts in that month ( age 10 ) 344 texts a day , based on 28 days of camp.

I called his house today and his wife told me about this. She never wanted her kids to text either. She was, and is, concerned about "sexting" more than anything else, though. No worries about cost as they have unlimited texting.... Seems to me like the kids were trying to see if that was indeed true!

I'll see him on Sunday. I wonder if he will have changed his mind.

I don't think I could do 500 texts in a day if I tried!!

Heck, I don't think I've done 500 texts in my whole entire life!

 

[DrCavin]

I must be totally naive, 'cause I don't even see how this is possible? 530 texts a day = one text every 1.8 minutes for 16 hours a day, every day?! Doesn't this kid need to eat, use the bathroom, etc., let alone go swimming, hiking, or whatever else they supposedly do at camp?

It is incoming & outgoing. If they send to multiple people at the same time that, that multiplies the count.

Texting is how this generation communicates, other generations spent hours on the phone talking to friends.

 

[clutter]

Here's a thought, too. I wouldn't judge how much a child is texting by looking at usage at camp. My dd just came home from a 4-day camp. She decided not to bring her phone, BUT she did borrow other's phones twice to talk to me. What I'm thinking is that there's a good chance that it wasn't just one kid texting. Just thinking....

 

[EthansMom]

The sleepaway camp I'm looking at for my DS for next summer doesn't allow cell phones, Ipods, game systems, etc... And for the price you spend for the kid to go to camp, they'd better be doing something other than text messaging the whole time!

My DS8 said a few kids in his class have cell phones. Honestly, there's NO reason for DS8 to have one yet. But, I'll probably get him a prepaid cell when he goes to middle school where activities finish up at odd times. Even then, I think we'll wait a few years before we allow text messaging.

Like you, Papa, I'd like my kids to be interacting with the world around them instead of text messaging all the time. I think we'll also have a basket where the kids can drop their cell phones (turned off) when they come in the house.

 

[K and K's Mommy]

My 10 year old doesn't have a phone and has never asked for one. But, he's a boy. My almost 8 year old DD will be a different story I am sure.

My DH thinks they can have a phone when they start driving. I think we will probably get them one before then. If he stays after school in middle school (still a year away), I think I would want him to have one for safety reasons. In elementary they are monitored until a parent picks them up.

 

[C.Ann]

DGD (11 next month) has a cell phone to be used for emergencies - no texting capabilities - nor will there be.. DD and her DH both have cell phones - they don't have texting capabilities either and see absolutely no need for them..

I had a cell phone (at my Dson-in-law's insistence) - no texting - never used it.. It was a Trac Fone and I don't even know where it is anymore.. (Of course he doesn't know that or he would have a fit.. LOL)..

I don't see the need for texting at all.. But then I never saw the need for cell phones either.. LOL

 

[mhsjax]

The sleepaway camp I'm looking at for my DS for next summer doesn't allow cell phones, Ipods, game systems, etc... And for the price you spend for the kid to go to camp, they'd better be doing something other than text messaging the whole time!

My DS8 said a few kids in his class have cell phones. Honestly, there's NO reason for DS8 to have one yet. But, I'll probably get him a prepaid cell when he goes to middle school where activities finish up at odd times. Even then, I think we'll wait a few years before we allow text messaging.

Like you, Papa, I'd like my kids to be interacting with the world around them instead of text messaging all the time. I think we'll also have a basket where the kids can drop their cell phones (turned off) when they come in the house.

I hope you mean a basket for your kids and not kids visiting. Most parents I know contact their kids on the cell phone when they ned them to come home or to give them some other message. I would be pretty ticked off if some other parent told my kid to turn off their cell phone and I couldn't get in touch with them.

 

[eeyoremum]

Wow cell phones at 8? I don't have one and I am much older than that. I don't even know how to text and my kids don't have cells (15 and 10) either althought they likely now how to text. They all seem to.

 

[LisaR]

I don't see the need for texting at all.. But then I never saw the need for cell phones either.. LOL

In fairness, some of us have kids that have activities that don't get out at the same time regularly. A cell phone comes in handy or else I would spend my time sitting outside activities waiting for them to end. In addition, my kids are old enough to go to movies and the mall alone with friends. I want them to be able to contact me when there is a problem or if they are ready to be picked up.
I do find them to be very handy in today's busy society.

As for texting, I was totally against it for the longest time. The grammar and spelling used during texting makes me cringe. That said, we now have a package that is almost exclusively texting and I am thrilled with it.

We switched to Go Phones from AT&T. We pay .25 cents a minute per phone call but nobody uses it for calls. We pay $5 a month for 200 text messages or $10 a month for 1000 text messages. We have four phones, a teen girl and a tween boy and our yearly cell phone bill is only $400. We had the cheapest package with Verizon for three phones and it cost us $1200 a year! We are now saving $800 a year and my kids have limited texting. They have had to learn to use it wisely. It works out great and I have peace of mind because I can contact them whenever necessary.

 

[Papa Deuce]

Wow cell phones at 8? I don't have one and I am much older than that. I don't even know how to text and my kids don't have cells (15 and 10) either althought they likely now how to text. They all seem to.

It really isn't a big deal. They haven't made a single call yet. They have been informed that it is ONLY for emergencies. But as long as I had an extra phone, and it is included in our family plan, then why not let them carry it for safety reasons?

They have been told that they can only call the numbers that are on the phone... things like Home, my work, my wife's work, grandmom, 911, our next door neighbor, and maybe 2 -3 more people.

 

[FayeW]

My DS12 and DD14 share an old phone that we had reactivated on a "pay as you go" plan. We were paying $25 every 6 or 8 weeks, no texting, but the text function was enabled. What we discovered was that while my kids weren't texting, their friends were texting them, and using up all the money (.15 per text adds up). In the last couple of months I found I was having to add more money to the account about every 3 weeks instead of 4-6. I just changed the plan and now they have 2500 texts for $10. and then the remaining $15 is for calls and service fees.

They don't use the phone to call their friends, just for us to be able to reach them if they have activities, etc.