Must DH wear suit to a wedding

[CaptainAmerica]

Huh, must be something new because it was only ever Mr and Mrs invited to something as special as a wedding. So now they also invite their children. Imagine that, old traditions that have changed over time...

That's just false. Children were traditionally invited to weddings and limiting them to adults is a modern departure from tradition.

Regardless, the tradition underlying all of this is "respect the wishes of the bride and groom," which would include not bringing children if they're not invited and honoring the dress code.

 

[kdonnel]

"I know better than the collected wisdom of thousands of years of human history. Screw those old dead bastards, what did they know?"

Tradition is tradition for a reason.

Tradition is only tradition because a new tradition has not replaced it, yet.

Nothing lasts forever.

 

[rlk]

"I know better than the collected wisdom of thousands of years of human history. Screw those old dead bastards, what did they know?"

Tradition is tradition for a reason.

And many traditions are outdated, therefore it is a wise person to be able to adapt and change with modern times. Just because something was done a certain way a thousand years ago, doesn't mean it works today or is even necessary anymore.

 

[Wendy31]

If I’ve learned anything on the DIS, it’s that weddings are very, very regional.

So, for here in the South, a man in dress slacks & a button-down dress shirt w/ a tie, would probably be just fine for a wedding at an aquarium, especially if the wedding is during the warmer months.

Men just don’t wear suits to every event like they used to. And, sometimes, wearing a suit to an event where no one else is wearing a suit is going to make you look out of place or even out of style/not as contemporary.

However, that said, we do have dressier weddings down here too - so it really depends. What time of day is the wedding? Does the invitation specify? Do you know the couple well? Are they more casual or more formal? Have you seen pictures from other weddings at this particular venue?

There are just all kinds of variables when it comes to wedding attire.

My husband & I have been to weddings w/ receptions that were semi-casual, & my husband didn’t wear a suit. We’ve also been to weddings w/ that were more formal, & he did wear a suit.

And the venue doesn’t always matter. He’s worn suits to a wedding reception in a barn & an outdoor wedding reception because they were both more formal events while he didn’t wear a suit to a wedding reception that was in an indoor hall because it was a more casual event.

(I do think it’s a good idea for a man to have a suit though for that occasion where wearing a suit is needed.)

 

[leahgoogle]

Some people can’t understand that times change. I have a friend who gets all bent out of shape because young people these days don’t write in cursive.

There was a cursive thread awhile back. There are many, many differing opinions about that!

 

[Mackenzie Click-Mickelson]

The locale to me seems fine to me to wear what your husband is planning to. It sounds dressy enough to me. Adding a tie especially.

As for someone not owning a suit sometimes it really just depends on one's life circumstances, the norms in the areas that they grew up and live in, the jobs they've held, etc.

As to shirt it's usually understood there's multiple types of shirts. Just calling things shirt is not sufficient for others, if that's what your system is that's what your system is but it's usually not helpful to anyone else beyond you. If my husband asked me "hey can you get me a shirt" I'm not going to have a clue which kind. He has t-shirts, undershirts (mostly plain but some graphic tees double as this depending on what he's wearing), dress shirts (buttoned up), one that are buttoned up but not as dressy and polo shirts for work and polo shirts for golfing.

 

[rotlex]

Not everyone wears a suit to a wedding. My last one my wife and I both dressed "business casual" basically. With that said, I don't own a suit that fits anymore, but they can be rented reasonably from certain mens stores as well.

 

[Lumpy1106]

My husband and I have a wedding to attend next month. He doesn't have a suit to wear. At our age (72) he has no real need to spend the money on a suit. Would it be ok to just wear a dress shirt with tie and dress pants. The wedding and reception are being held at an aquarium.

DH could wear a wetsuit <rimshot>

 

[CaptainAmerica]

I don't own a suit that fits anymore...

I genuinely can't even fathom this. What would you do if someone died tomorrow and you had to go to a funeral?

 

[Mackenzie Click-Mickelson]

Men just don’t wear suits to every event like they used to.

That's been my observation too. I've attended various work events with my husband, weddings, funerals, visitations and wakes, etc and fewer and fewer are wearing full suits. I've seen suit pants worn but not the jacket as well. And this isn't just younger people, I've seen it from the older and the elderly. It's not that people aren't wanting to dress appropriately IMO but rather what is constituting a narrow definition of appropriate is expanding.

 

[soccerdad72]

I genuinely can't even fathom this. What would you do if someone died tomorrow and you had to go to a funeral?

You seriously can't fathom this? There's a great deal of things I can't fathom, but the fact that someone has grown out of a suit is not on that list.

 

[Smugpugmug]

That's been my observation too. I've attended various work events with my husband, weddings, funerals, visitations and wakes, etc and fewer and fewer are wearing full suits. I've seen suit pants worn but not the jacket as well. And this isn't just younger people, I've seen it from the older and the elderly. It's not that people aren't wanting to dress appropriately IMO but rather what is constituting a narrow definition of appropriate is expanding.

I agree. I see this at Disney too. I've been to a few of the signature dining restaurants that have a posted dress code and I have never seen the dress code upheld at any of them. I remember going to Jiko with my sister and friend where we dressed a little nicer (dresses and make up). Meanwhile everyone sitting around us were in t shirts, jean shorts, tank tops and flip flops. I'm not expecting anyone to wear a suit at Disney obviously. I just get confused as to why those restaurants have a dress code when they are never enforced.

I also think this might be a cultural thing. When I lived in Germany, people there dressed WAY nicer for events. Even for going out to restaurants/bars, people wore nicer clothes than a t shirt and jeans.

 

[sam_gordon]

Weddings are going that way too I’m afraid.

I'm curious... why are you "afraid" of Weddings getting more casual? Unless you are the ones getting married, why do you care what anyone else wears to the wedding?

"I know better than the collected wisdom of thousands of years of human history. Screw those old dead bastards, what did they know?"

Tradition is tradition for a reason.

Hmmm... I wonder what other things should have been carried on because "thousands of years of humans" thought it was wise.

I genuinely can't even fathom this. What would you do if someone died tomorrow and you had to go to a funeral?

I've never worn a suit in my life. I've rented tuxes for a handful of occasions (including my wedding). If I had to go to a funeral tomorrow, if I REALLY needed to... black shoes, black socks, black slacks. A "shirt" (using your terms), tie, and a black sport coat. Do you really think at a funeral, someone is going to look at me and say (or even think) "it's so disrespectful he didn't wear a suit"?

 

[Disneylover99]

I genuinely can't even fathom this. What would you do if someone died tomorrow and you had to go to a funeral?

You can still dress nicely/respectfully without wearing a suit.
Do people get judged at a funeral? As far as I know, there is no dress code.
It’s more important to be there, then worry about your outfit.

 

[amylevan]

I genuinely can't even fathom this. What would you do if someone died tomorrow and you had to go to a funeral?

You can’t fathom that someone has grown out of a suit and hasn’t felt the need to replace it?

The recent funerals I’ve been at, sadly a few, have not been 100% suits. Heck, the ladies weren’t all in dresses or pantsuits either. And all black wasn’t really a thing either.

I think there are way more important things at a funeral then what you are wearing.

 

[kymom99]

There was a cursive thread awhile back. There are many, many differing opinions about that!

Oh I know!

 

[kymom99]

I genuinely can't even fathom this. What would you do if someone died tomorrow and you had to go to a funeral?

Wear a shirt and pants

 

[DisneyByMarriage]

OP - if your husband won’t care if he happens to be the only man not wearing a suit jacket (most weddings I’ve been to in Philadelphia prior to pandemic) were a sport coat type deal for men. That said, we once went to a wedding years ago, in New York, after just having a baby, and my girlfriend said “casual like your wedding was” (my wedding was in Key west and I just requested people not wear shorts). He didn’t take a suit jacket and everyone else at the wedding was a New Yorker and my husband was underdressed. He was embarrassed and to this day always takes a sport coat. But my other girlfriends dad also followed winery casual dress code and was in jeans. Long story - he won’t be the only one without a coat and if it doesn’t bother him, a shirt and tie is fine.

 

[rotlex]

I genuinely can't even fathom this. What would you do if someone died tomorrow and you had to go to a funeral?

You can't fathom this? Are you actually being serious? lol, you know you can rent suits right? Or dress very nicely without a suit? Our local Men's Wearhouse can get them to you same day if needed.

 

[mjkacmom]

That's just false. Children were traditionally invited to weddings and limiting them to adults is a modern departure from tradition.

Regardless, the tradition underlying all of this is "respect the wishes of the bride and groom," which would include not bringing children if they're not invited and honoring the dress code.

Not true, I’ve rarely seen children at weddings here, I think it is very regional (which is why I asked for the OP’s location). I also think that weddings/funerals haven’t become more casual here (unless it’s not a traditional reception, and maybe young men college aged or younger can get away without a suit at a funeral, although my IL’s are mid 90’s so I really should think about getting ds19 a suit, ds24 has a few).