Moms Groups?

[becka]

Please do NOT turn this into a SAHM vs. WOHM debate. I have zero interest in continuing that kind of a discussion right now. I have heard all the arguments on both sides and I don't need to hear them again.

Now with that said why does it seem that all Moms groups seem to exclude working mothers? One of my good friends who lives in Kansas City told me that she recently started going to a M.O.P.S. (Mothers of Preschoolers) group and she really enjoyed it and thought it was a good little "support" group and a place to get good ideas for the kids. She knew I have been stressed lately so she said I should get on-line and see if they have a group where I live. Well they do but as usual they only meet in the mornings on a weekday when I work. Every group, activity, etc.. that I have ever heard about is only for SAHMs and they meet during the weekdays. Why can't some of these groups have just one meeting in the evenings so a few working Moms can attend? Do they just feel that working Moms do not need support and/or don't have time to play with our kids? I just really don't understand.

 

[mudnuri]

you could always start one???

I've never been interested in "mom groups" but I live where I grew up so already have a big enough circle of friends I guess

Brandy

 

[Rafiki Rafiki Rafiki]

Becka, what about going to a group that is centered around things you love to get your mind off the kids once or twice a month?

I always feel so much better when I've gone to do something that was for ME and not them...

 

[ItsonlyExperiment626]

I think most of these mommy groups are set up more as a social gathering for the SAHM because they are isolated being the only adult at home during the day with the kids, as WOHMs have adult social contact at their place of work. Also, by the time some WOHMs get home, it's bedtime for preschoolers.

 

[Kermit]

I know of some mother support groups that have night or weekend meetings so that working moms can attend. This isn't what you're looking for, but I'm involved with La Leche League, and we do try to have day and night meetings available so that all moms can find a meeting that works well with their schedule.

I do think that for some of the more activity-centered groups (like the ones that arrange field trips), they're more geared toward SAHMs because they assume that children in daycare are doing those types of activities there.

 

[merrily]

I work at a Family Resource Center. We have tried on numerous occasions to get a week night or even weekend day moms group going without success. Our morning groups (some are playgroups, some are support groups)are overflowing with people (dads included!) When we offer classes on specific topics at night people attend. It seems harder to get people to an ongoing group. I know as a working parent myself, that once I get home there is dinner and housework and activites and homework and .... so there doesn't seem to be extra time. I second the suggestion of doing something fun for yourself once or twice a month but urge you to check with your local family resource center to see if they have any suggestions for the support that you are looking for. Being a parent can be very stressful!

 

[binny]

I used to lead a MOPS group and we had meetings during the day for the SAHMs but also tried to get together a coupletimes a months for WOHMs to join in too.


Sorry you feel excluded.

 

[dcgrumpy]

ITA Becka, my sister and I were looking for some kind of playgroup type thing to take our 2 DD's to, there was absolutely nothing for weeknights or weekends. Even places that had "open play" were only on weekday mornings or noontime.

 

[Lisa loves Pooh]

At my church--they offer two groups for women...one for any woman and one for Moms or mother figures. Both groups offer an evening session and as long as there is enough for a group--it will convene. If there isn't enough interest, it gets cancelled.

I agree with another poster--if there isn't a group meeting your needs, you can always form one.

As far as facilities not offering play groups and such....they are probably getting competition from dance classes and sports leagues and other areas of interest and the caregiver cannot necessarily be in two places at once. Also--if it is a paid activity, unless it is at minimum--a break even venture (for a community center) or modestly profitable--lack of interest is what kills the program. Not necessariliy the lack of consideration to the working parent.

 

[disykat]

Start one. The daytime groups are started by SAHMs who are available during the day and that is the most convenient time for them. It's not about excluding people, it's about what works best for the people involved.

I have been very involved in a daytime moms group at my church for years. We specifically do daytime because that is the time when we feel isolated. It seems like the rest of the world is going to work, while most of us are Career on Hold moms. In the evenings, life goes back to normal. Our kids look forward to daddy coming home, bedtime routine, we have meetings, things with our older children, etc. The daytime is the time that we need to create positive activities for little ones and for ourselves.

Our group also started a "moms night out" once a month and invited all the working moms in our church - not that many were interested. Our moms night out group phases in and out according to interest, but the daytime group continues strong.

I remember my sisters comment when finding out about my moms group - she's a single woman. "Oh, that's so exclusive!" I really don't get how something can be "inclusive" if it is based on a specific need - the need for support for women at home during the day with their kids.

I have been involved in both groups - moms groups that include all moms and daytime moms groups. They're two different things meeting different needs.

 

[ceiligh1]

You should try the online group called meetup.com. They have many different groups in my area both for Stay at home's as well as at work moms. Also if they dont quite have what you want/need they can help you start one. They are very popular in my area. Good luck, we all need all the support we can get.