MK cast members need sensitivity training

[mechurchlady]

I got 3 of my daily 4 hours so another point.

Some CMs are regular people who try to make small talk with guests. Maybe the person has mental issues or language difficulties that made what they said come out wrong. CMs used ask about me and my health and cared about me. Maybe they have poor socialization skills. If A person is really interested I do not mind but then again I would be bothered if somebody was acting like I was a faker.

 

[Eeyores Butterfly]

As a former MK CM, please accept my apology on behalf of these two. I'm sorry to hear about those rude comments. I worked in MK (Fantasyland) my first CP and took a lot of pride in my job. It always bothers me when I hear stories like these. The first person may not have necessarily meant anything by the question. It's not uncommon for people to rent a wheelchair because of a sprain and he may have thought he was making small talk. He still shouldn't have asked it. There was absolutely not excuse for the second person.

Even if you don't remember their names, still contact guest relations and relay the locations. That way those areas can communicate with their Cast Members about this issue. Believe me, the majority of people I worked with took great pride in their jobs and wanted to make magic for each and every guest. If they knew that something they said or did offended a guest unncessarily, they would work to change it. We can't fix what we don't know is broken.

I'm glad that other than those two, you had a good experience. I hope they didn't put too much of a damper on your trip.

 

[dclfun]

Also remember that those of us whose disabilities are apparent get the stares and comments all the time and also have CM's sometimes ask us sensitive questions. It may have been, as others have mentioned, "small talk" as in concern that your daughter may have been injured during the trip, etc. I'm sorry you had a negative experience though.---Kathy

 

[DisDreaminMom]

I know you are all going to flame me (again) but one thing I notice is there is a huge disconnect between the knowledge of "protocol" between disabled people and the general public. I'm not trying to be mean, but sometimes an effort at making conversation or breaking the ice is seen as some invisible offense. I've been cursed at for opening the door for someone in a wheelchair. I was in a wheelchair for months after an injury and I damn sure liked it when someone was polite enough to open the door for me. But some people think I am discounting their ability (?) or something.

And some people with visible issues say they would rather you ask instead of stare (in the case of children, etc.) And others say "How dare you for making eye contact!" and we are all supposed to ignore them. I've seen children screamed at by people with guide dogs for noticing the dog- not even touching the dog, but saying "Oh, a doggy! Hi doggy!". And I've seen (lots more, thankfully) people with assistance dogs gently say, "Please don't distract my dog, he needs to concentrate on me, but his name is Chuck and he helps me and works very hard."

I work at TDS and I got yelled at by a guest for saying hello back to an adult mentally handicapped woman who repeatedly greeted me. It's my job to be nice and make conversation and go with my guests, but this woman's caretaker apparently was trying to take her to the mall and teach her NOT to talk to everyone. So after I said Hi and hugged this woman back- she came rushing up to hug me and she was SO HAPPY, the caretaker yells "Don't talk to her! She's not allowed to talk to you!!! She's being bad! Ignore her!" I was just in a state of shock. What am I supposed to think the next time I see her or anyone else in that condition? (And by condition, I mean overtly happy to be at The Disney Store)

So what I'm saying is that YOU all know the law, what people are "supposed to do", but you have to give the rest of the world a little slack and understand that they are either ignorant or misinformed, or maybe a little jaded. Cause it's hard to be nice when you don't know if a ten ton chip is going to come rolling off someone's shoulder. I don't know anyone that is a mind reader, so if you need or don't need something or are defensive about something, then it's your job to do it nicely and it's my job as a fellow human to help you. No one knows how you have been treated your whole life, or that day, or five minutes ago. For that matter, you don't know how the other guy has been either. So do you see how it's a two way street?

The one thing no one has mentioned here is that perhaps the young lady in question here is attractive, and these boys were doing a terrible job of flirting, boy style. But when met with defensive response and hostility, they responded in kind. I'm just saying... Flame away.

 

[jrt1176]

The CM wasnt interrogating the girl!

He was simply inquiring and making conversation. He asked if she sprained her ankle. Maybe he was trying to be nice and someone took it the wrong way.

I'm not judging here, but we are only hearing one side of the story.

 

[merryweather20]

The CM wasnt interrogating the girl!

He was simply inquiring and making conversation. He asked if she sprained her ankle. Maybe he was trying to be nice and someone took it the wrong way.

I'm not judging here, but we are only hearing one side of the story.

I promise you asking "What's wrong with you?" does not come off as nice! I would have expected better out of a CM myself. And as for guessing why a person is using a wheel-chair? Why play games? People do that to me too, and I've never had them guess right .

It doesn't matter what side of the story we're hearing the CM's shouldn't be asking personal medical questions, or making the guests uncomfortable.

 

[DisDreaminMom]

In the line of possible flirting, "What happened to you?" is a lot less wolfish than, "What's a hot girl like you doing in a wheelchair?" And lots of people are in wheelchairs for temporary reasons, so maybe they thought she had some cute story and were breaking the ice. Wheelchair=obvious subject. Hot chick=not immediately declarable. This is how boys think.

 

[Justsyd2]

I am so sorry for your bad experience. I know that it's hard, but sometimes you just have to make people think about what they are saying. I find that some people blurt their thoughts out without giving it a second thought, and it never occurs to them that someone else may take it the wrong way. Should this happen again, I would advise your daughter to answer, "what happened to you?" with humour... "I was attacked by a bear..." Sometimes you have to make the best of the situation, and be the bigger person. You can choose how you wish to react to any situation. For me, I choose humour as opposed to anger.

 

[McCall]

In the line of possible flirting, "What happened to you?" is a lot less wolfish than, "What's a hot girl like you doing in a wheelchair?" And lots of people are in wheelchairs for temporary reasons, so maybe they thought she had some cute story and were breaking the ice. Wheelchair=obvious subject. Hot chick=not immediately declarable. This is how boys think.

So either he is a rude clueless untrained CM or he is a CM using his job to hit on pretty girls. I believe you will find both are against Disney policy and he should not be doing either one.

As for knowing the law and what people should be doing, it makes a big difference if the person making the comment is just a person you happen to come across or an employee with whom you have to deal in some way.

I expect someone waiting on me in any capacity to go by the "rules" for whatever the situation is.

 

[KPeveler]

So either he is a rude clueless untrained CM or he is a CM using his job to hit on pretty girls. I believe you will find both are against Disney policy and he should not be doing either one.

As for knowing the law and what people should be doing, it makes a big difference if the person making the comment is just a person you happen to come across or an employee with whom you have to deal in some way.

I expect someone waiting on me in any capacity to go by the "rules" for whatever the situation is.

there is also a difference between a guy hitting on a pretty girl, or an old lady making conversation, and a CM questioning (for any reason) someone over whom he has authority (a guest)... As a CM that person has a certain responsibility, and any questioning of a disability is wrong/rude/illegal...

 

[soarintotower]

I am so sorry to hear about your horrible experience! Any CM that makes a comment like the ones you described is totally insensitive and should be complained about! As a current CM I would never, ever, ever question someone in a stroller, WC, or ECV...it is completely inappropriate. If anything, I would say, "Ouch! Hope you didn't do that on vacation" if the person has a cast or something on.

I suppose I've been in the same boat before though, so I understand better. I had a tumor in my left tibia and have been unable to walk for the past two months. I would get people glaring at me in Publix for using an ECV and at the parks for using a WC a lot. It makes you feel horrible.

Once again, I am so sorry for your experience! I truly hope on your next WDW visit you run into kinder, more compassionate CMs!

 

[Cheshire Figment]

Today at Indiana Jones while waiting for the show to start I was talking to a woman in a wheelchair with a cast on her foot. I asked her if she had kicked her husband too hard. She and her husband both laughed and then mentioned what had actually happened.

 

[mechurchlady]

there is also a difference between a guy hitting on a pretty girl, or an old lady making conversation, and a CM questioning (for any reason) someone over whom he has authority (a guest)... As a CM that person has a certain responsibility, and any questioning of a disability is wrong/rude/illegal...

Wow has this turned into an ugly thread. Part of being a CM is to greet guests and sometimes the CM will try to make small talk. He could have worded his inquiry different but was he trying to find out if she was faking, who knows. This whole thread is blowing things out of proportion.

It is nice that people worry about me. I do not play the disabled card. Just like the race card, people have been know to play the disabled card. OMG that person was rude to me because I am XXXX (insert label). Yes I have seen someone not get an apartment because the landladies thought he was straight. I have seen people accuse others of being rude based on race, skin colour, ugliness, fatness, age, religion, and disability. CMs are people who are not all knowing beings who know how to properly greet a guest who is of their world. I need to wait for Sue to lock this and I hope this thread focuses more on what to do and if this is one individual or an ongoing park problem.

 

[ireland_nicole]

OP sorry that this happened to you and your DD. It shouldn't have happened. And yes, it happens to us, too. Regularly in fact. I would add that it is probably a good idea to develop a set of "prepared" responses, it will make any future encounters easier. For instance.

On my car is a sticker: Of course you can have my disabled space; just be sure to take my disability with it.

On my ECV i made a sticker; First I got sick and then I got fat. I'm actually considering changing it for, no, this is not my mother's scooter.

On my kids stroller is a button: Celebrate Neurodiversity; and a big autism ribon.

When I'm told, you don't look sick/disabled, etc. I have been known to reply, well, you don't look stupid either... but looks can be deceiving (when being a little nicer, i replace stupid w/ ignorant.) You know, looking at that, I guess I'm still not very nice

When asked why my kids are still on a leash (especially in crowded places, as they are both elopers) I have said, only since he/she bit the mailman!

OK, I have a very sick sense of humor; but at least I don't have to be shocked and speechless too often

 

[dclfun]

I still don't know if the CM was thinking this young lady was a "faker" or if the family ( or daughter) was worried about how she was being perceived since the disability was invisible. People ask me questions all the time, including, "what's wrong with you" even though they can see my disability. My son who is a young adult is in kidney failure. On the days he has dialysis he has no energy at all and even on a good day he doesn't have much stamina. I truly think it's harder for him with an invisible disability as he doesn't wish to be perceived as disabled or needing special accommodations, but he is and he does. As a mother, it hurts me more to see him struggle with this issue than it does for me to struggle with mine and I'm much more sensitive to the comments of others- it's hard to think our children have had their feelings hurt or have been misjudged. While none of us were there or know what the CM's intentions were ( again, they may have been making small talk) I doubt they meant to offend the OP or her daughter. As was mentioned by a PP, don't develop that big chip on the shoulder- your response of making light of the conversation will do more to help your daughter than to get upset over a percieved offense. ---Kathy

 

[McCall]

None of us know exactly how these comments were made. But I have no reason to question the OP's perception as I am sure she has dealt with similiar issues in the past and SHE WAS THERE.
As usual with such threads the gung ho Disney can do no wrong people are coming out to say that there is surely an innocent explanation and how nasty the rest of us are if we think the behavior as stated is unacceptable and the CM's involved should have been reported.
I don't see anything in this thread that should cause it to be locked, just differences of oppinion which is what a forum is about.

 

[mechurchlady]

As usual with such threads the gung ho Disney can do no wrong people are coming out to say that there is surely an innocent explanation and how nasty the rest of us are if we think the behavior as stated is unacceptable and the CM's involved should have been reported.

I am one of them gung ho CM supporters who has read enough posts from CMs and known CMs to know that there may be other answers. When was it suddenly wrong to question the original poster? When is it not right to look at other possible explanations?

This board is about disabilities and what if a person is not socially ept? What if the CM was sick or fatigued and was trying to make small talk with a guest? I would report them or at least talk to them as educating goes a lot longer than unemployment does.

I try to walk a block in someone else's shoes before I condemn them. I have had my bad days and people on this board know when it is one of them bad days where my posts are gibberish. Education is the key to changing people not reporting. Understanding and educating people goes a lot further than reporting people. It is tough to work in the public these days as it seems everytime you turn around someone is offended.

::cop: SUE, time to lock this up nice and tight.

 

[WheeledTraveler]

I send my sympathies to the OP. I'm in my mid-20s and have been using a wheelchair for "non-obvious" reasons for about 4 years. I still get the questions all the time from people who have even less reason to ask than a CM would.

I think part of the reason people (and I'm one of them) get offended and upset by getting asked "what happened?" or "what's wrong?" is because it means the person isn't really seeing me, they're seeing the wheelchair. If you want to make conversation ask me how I am or how I'm enjoying WDW or something about me, not about my wheelchair. It's part of "see the person, not the disability". Also, most people who ask such questions are often the sort of people who wouldn't say anything to me at all if I was AB. In that case it's just a rude comment.

The one situation where I don't generally mind is when it's a kid asking because I've seen enough parents scare their kids away from me, I don't want to scare them myself.

And for the record, I do generally answer politely to anyone who asks and tend to brush it off as "my legs don't work right" because my medical history is none of their business.

Digressing slightly, for the person who mentioned having been yelled at by someone for opening a door for them, the only time I'd do so is if I was already in the process of opening the door. I don't have great trunk control and people grabbing doors away from me as I'm already opening can (and has) either tip me out forwards from my chair or tip the entire chair over backwards (yes, I yelled "let go" at that person and then calmed down enough to explain why once I'd picked myself off the ground and gotten back into my chair). What I tell people who want to know how to approach such situations is to ask first. Most people who use wheelchairs that I know have no problem and will be polite if you ask. And if someone yells at you for asking, they're a jerk and not worth your time anyway.

 

[jrt1176]

I just think its silly to argue about without knowing the CM's intent!

Maybe he was being nice and making conversation. It's all in the tone and delivery! The way you say something can make it sound different than reading it in text!

We are only getting the mother's perspective. I'm not saying she is wrong or anything, but every parent takes up for their child and is protective...especially is they perceive something like she did.

I'm just saying that maybe the kid was trying to make conversation and cheer someone up. The CM is a kid also... Maybe he isnt the best talker, etc. I just dont think we can throw someone under the bus without knowing their side.

 

[kpadalik]

I can't believe the CMs said that! How rude!

We are heading to Universal next weekend and my MIL is coming with us. Well, last week she came down w/ plantar fasciitis. We reserved an ECV for her. I know she doesn't want to use it, but she knows she needs to. I think we will just hang a sign on it that says, "I have plantar fasciitis. That's why I am using an ECV. Mind your own business." She would get a kick out of it!