SuiteDisney
<font color=CC66CC>Short Post Man cracks me up!<br
- Joined
- Nov 25, 2001
- Messages
- 4,731
Blessed are those who hunger and thirst, for they are sticking to
their diets.
Life is an endless struggle full of frustrations and challenges,
but eventually you find a hairstylist you like.
You're getting old when you get the same sensation from a rocking
chair that you once got from a roller coaster.
Perhaps you know why women over fifty don't have babies. They
would put them down somewhere and forget where they left them.
One of the life's mysteries is how a two-pound box of candy can
make a woman gain five pounds.
It's frustrating when you know all the answers and nobody bothers to ask you the questions.
If you can remain calm, you just don't have all the facts.
I finally got my head together, and my body fell apart.
The real art of conversation is not only to say the right thing
in the right place, but also to leave unsaid the wrong thing at
the tempting moment.
Time may be a great healer, but it's also a lousy beautician.
Brain cells come and brain cells go, but fat cells live forever.
Age doesn't always bring wisdom. Sometimes age comes alone.
Life doesn't just begin at forty; it also begins to show then.
Just when I was getting used to yesterday, along came today.
Sometimes I think I understand everything, then I regain
consciousness.
If at first you don't succeed, see if the loser gets anything.
You don't stop laughing because you grow old; you grow old
because you stop laughing.
I don't mind the rat race, but I could do with a little more
cheese.
I had to give up jogging for my health. My thighs kept rubbing
together and setting my pantyhose on fire.
Amazing! You just hang something in your closet for a while, and
it shrinks two sizes.
It is bad to suppress laughter; it goes back down and spreads to
your hips.
Age is important only if you're cheese or wine.
The only time a woman wishes she were a year older is when she is expecting a baby.
Freedom of the press means no-iron clothes.
Inside some of us is a thin person struggling to get out, but she
can usually be sedated with a few pieces of chocolate cake.
Can it be a mistake that "STRESSED" is "DESSERTS" spelled
backwards?
their diets.
Life is an endless struggle full of frustrations and challenges,
but eventually you find a hairstylist you like.
You're getting old when you get the same sensation from a rocking
chair that you once got from a roller coaster.
Perhaps you know why women over fifty don't have babies. They
would put them down somewhere and forget where they left them.
One of the life's mysteries is how a two-pound box of candy can
make a woman gain five pounds.
It's frustrating when you know all the answers and nobody bothers to ask you the questions.
If you can remain calm, you just don't have all the facts.
I finally got my head together, and my body fell apart.
The real art of conversation is not only to say the right thing
in the right place, but also to leave unsaid the wrong thing at
the tempting moment.
Time may be a great healer, but it's also a lousy beautician.
Brain cells come and brain cells go, but fat cells live forever.
Age doesn't always bring wisdom. Sometimes age comes alone.
Life doesn't just begin at forty; it also begins to show then.
Just when I was getting used to yesterday, along came today.
Sometimes I think I understand everything, then I regain
consciousness.
If at first you don't succeed, see if the loser gets anything.
You don't stop laughing because you grow old; you grow old
because you stop laughing.
I don't mind the rat race, but I could do with a little more
cheese.
I had to give up jogging for my health. My thighs kept rubbing
together and setting my pantyhose on fire.
Amazing! You just hang something in your closet for a while, and
it shrinks two sizes.
It is bad to suppress laughter; it goes back down and spreads to
your hips.
Age is important only if you're cheese or wine.
The only time a woman wishes she were a year older is when she is expecting a baby.
Freedom of the press means no-iron clothes.
Inside some of us is a thin person struggling to get out, but she
can usually be sedated with a few pieces of chocolate cake.
Can it be a mistake that "STRESSED" is "DESSERTS" spelled
backwards?
