Language used by CMs

[mamabunny]

To you it may not be. That’s the magic of words. They evoke different feeling in different people. “We” has been found to be less blunt and more gentle in unfamiliar situations. There is no perfect way to handle every person as you are a prime example. You don’t like it. Most others never notice. And some others would feel put off by “you”. There is no win.

My suggestion, don’t take little things like this personal. The CM doesn’t know you and isn’t trying to offend you. They didn’t think about you 5 seconds before they saw your chair, and won’t think of 5 seconds after you leave their work area. It’s not personal and they are trying their best to keep everyone happy.

I fail to see how the use of "we" is either less blunt or more gentle, especially in this situation.

When you have to use a personal mobility device on a daily basis, you encounter a great deal more of this type of de-humanizing behavior than the average bi-pedal human is ever aware of. While you are most likely correct that it isn't "personal" in nature and the "we" is being used as a "friendlier" substitute, by simply changing the phrase to "Will there be a transfer?" the question feels more appropriate. (obviously, I can't speak for the OP) "Will there be a transfer" takes away any hint of condescension or pity. It allows the appropriate person to answer the question without assuming anything further about the mobility user other than the question of transfer accommodation. "We" is only appropriate if the CM in question is also using a mobility device, and riding with the Guest as well.

@geek+nerd: is "able-splaining" a thing? I think it should be...

 

[mgrayar]

I fail to see how the use of "we" is either less blunt or more gentle, especially in this situation.

When you have to use a personal mobility device on a daily basis, you encounter a great deal more of this type of de-humanizing behavior than the average bi-pedal human is ever aware of. While you are most likely correct that it isn't "personal" in nature and the "we" is being used as a "friendlier" substitute, by simply changing the phrase to "Will there be a transfer?" the question feels more appropriate. (obviously, I can't speak for the OP) "Will there be a transfer" takes away any hint of condescension or pity. It allows the appropriate person to answer the question without assuming anything further about the mobility user other than the question of transfer accommodation. "We" is only appropriate if the CM in question is also using a mobility device, and riding with the Guest as well.

@geek+nerd: is "able-splaining" a thing? I think it should be...

We is used in the service industry commonly. It is not specific to situations where disabilities come into play. It is also very multicultural in use.

There is nothing about this topic that is specific to disabled interactions and no “able-splaining” necessary. I’ll bet if you listen for it, you’ll hear it several times a day if you go shopping, eat out, stay at a hotel.

I know you and the OP think it’s a slight to the disabled, but it is not. It is just a common practice in hospitality. Heck, I even catch myself saying “how are we doing today” when I greet patients. It’s just natural.

 

[Hopefully]

I don’t understand what could possibly be “accusatory” in asking someone, “Are you able to transfer?” I am the one in the chair. I am the one they need information about.

Given your education, training and experience I think you are unique. I think you are way to sensitive.

 

[Allison]

I'm smiling at someone with the username geek+nerd posting this topic.

 

[Simba's Mom]

It is *certainly* better than when they look OVER your head, and ask a member of your traveling party "Can she transfer?" Guess what? She speaks for herself, thank you very much.

It may also be that the use of "we" is a way of not assuming a gender identity, although honestly, it strikes me more as what I refer to as "doctor office speak" where "we" often seems to be the preferred way to refer to any patient who has a companion with them. (i.e. "How are we today?" "Next, we will get on the scale." "Have we been measuring our blood sugar regularly?")

That would drive me crazy! It's probably the main reason why I'm glad I travel solo. There's no one else for the CMs to talk to, so they have to address me.

 

[zoo2tycoon]

Country, education and other things factor into how people speak. Nobody is perfect and to criticize a CM for this seems trivial.

 

[courtney1188]

They were definitely native English speakers. I have a linguistics background and am a language teacher.

Your linguistics background makes me even more surprised that this bothers you. Unless your focus was on prescriptive grammar rather than descriptive. Most linguistic experts I know find these sorts of changes in wording to be interesting (in an exciting way where they nerd out about talking why that change has occurred) rather than offensive.

 

[EveDallas]

Some people really look for anything to be offended by. I'd hate to live my life that way.

 

[geek+nerd]

Your linguistics background makes me even more surprised that this bothers you. Unless your focus was on prescriptive grammar rather than descriptive. Most linguistic experts I know find these sorts of changes in wording to be interesting (in an exciting way where they nerd out about talking why that change has occurred) rather than offensive.

I do find the use of “we” interesting. While I said that I personally found it condescending, I never said anything about being up in arms and offended, as many on here have said I am. I also noticed that this is different language being used by CMs than I have encountered on previous trips and as such, I was curious about other people’s thoughts and experiences. I’ve certainly had a lot of input on people’s thoughts

BTW, I definitely identify as a descriptivist.

 

[geek+nerd]

I'm smiling at someone with the username geek+nerd posting this topic.

Thanks for the critique of my username. Your comment was so helpful to the discussion.

 

[geek+nerd]

I fail to see how the use of "we" is either less blunt or more gentle, especially in this situation.

When you have to use a personal mobility device on a daily basis, you encounter a great deal more of this type of de-humanizing behavior than the average bi-pedal human is ever aware of. While you are most likely correct that it isn't "personal" in nature and the "we" is being used as a "friendlier" substitute, by simply changing the phrase to "Will there be a transfer?" the question feels more appropriate. (obviously, I can't speak for the OP) "Will there be a transfer" takes away any hint of condescension or pity. It allows the appropriate person to answer the question without assuming anything further about the mobility user other than the question of transfer accommodation. "We" is only appropriate if the CM in question is also using a mobility device, and riding with the Guest as well.

@geek+nerd: is "able-splaining" a thing? I think it should be...

It is a thing!

 

[geek+nerd]

You are taking time to post a thread about the use of a personal pronoun while on vacation.
And then responding to comments about that personal pronoun while on vacation.

The CMs are saying nothing inappropriate.
If you feel the word "we" is condescending, then that is your hangup. Don't place blame on the CMs for your sensitivity.

Try to enjoy your vacation....

I had a great vacation!

FYI, I posted while in the hotel room while my husband showered and while on the bus.

 

[geek+nerd]

Country, education and other things factor into how people speak. Nobody is perfect and to criticize a CM for this seems trivial.

Please reread my original post. I was not criticizing anyone. I said that I noticed it from multiple CMs as new language and wanted to hear what others’ experiences are.

 

[geek+nerd]

Some people really look for anything to be offended by. I'd hate to live my life that way.

It would suck to live that way. I completely agree.

 

[North of Mouse]

I’ve been at WDW since 12/21, and I’ve noticed something new with how the CMs talk to me when entering a queue or getting up to the loading point. Quite a few use the wording, “Are we able to transfer?”

My gut response (which I have not used) is to say, “I can’t speak for you but I can.”

I’m curious if this is something that CMs have been trained to say or if it is just what they are comfortable with.

Personally, I don’t like it. I find it condescending, like a parent telling a child, “Now, now. We don’t act like that.”

I’m just curious as to others’ experiences and thoughts.

I don't feel it's anything new, and it is not limited to disabled or being in a wheel chair, etc. I hear it often just in ordinary daily life - the plural - just heard it this past week after checking out with my groceries - "Are we able to get that ma'am, or would you like some help with that'???? Also, was in a restaurant a couple days ago, and when I looked finished with my meal, the server asked, "Are we finished working on that"???? Not my favorite phrase, but I don't get offended by it.

Certainly shouldn't be taken as condescending at all, because it definitely isn't - just surprised you haven't heard it before.

 

[arminnie]

This is what I've noticed recently about being in a chair. At restaurants everybody smiles and says hello to me - even people who are eating and just put a big bite in their mouth. I think it may be because when I am in a chair I am at the same level that they are sitting at the table.

Not a complaint though. It's nice. It's especially nice because so many of these people are younger than I am and often of different ethnic or racial background. Groups of teens who would probably just ignore (not that there's anything wrong with that either) an old lady walking by just beam with smiles. And they are genuine smiles - they are not laughing at me or mocking me.

 

[AJKMOM]

We used to have a veterinarian who used "our" when talking about a pet: "Our bloodwork came back just fine, but we need to watch what we eat and lose weight". Talking about my 15 year old cat.
It made my day.

 

[ttintagel]

That's the way nurses speak to hospital patients. It's such a common trope that you see jokes about it in sitcons dating back to the 1960's and movies going back even further. I wouldn't care for it in a theme park setting; the last thing I want to feel like there is an inpatient!

 

[kaytieeldr]

I don’t understand what could possibly be “accusatory” in asking someone, “Are you able to transfer?” I am the one in the chair. I am the one they need information about.

Inflection.
“Are we able to transfer?"
“Are we able to transfer?”
“Are we able to transfer?”
“Are we able to transfer?”
“Are we able to transfer?”

“Are you able to transfer?”
“Are you able to transfer?”
“Are you able to transfer?”
“Are you able to transfer?”
“Are you able to transfer?”

 

[mamabunny]

That's the way nurses speak to hospital patients. It's such a common trope that you see jokes about it in sitcons dating back to the 1960's and movies going back even further. I wouldn't care for it in a theme park setting; the last thing I want to feel like there is an inpatient!

Exactly.

Inflection.
“Are we able to transfer?"
“Are we able to transfer?”
“Are we able to transfer?”
“Are we able to transfer?”
“Are we able to transfer?”

“Are you able to transfer?”
“Are you able to transfer?”
“Are you able to transfer?”
“Are you able to transfer?”
“Are you able to transfer?”

And yes to this too!