Just a rant about ungrateful relatives….

[Lilsia]

I booked a generous and awesome DVC room for a family who had always wanted to go to Disney. Hundreds of points. They canceled on me a couple months out, which is last minute by DVC standards. It put me in a terrible position.

They said they weren't able to afford the tickets, and thus they couldn't go. It's the only way to refuse the gift. And it was true, and tickets are really, really expensive. I had put them in a terrible position too.

It impacted the relationship. And completely destroyed my DVC fantasy of being so generous and giving such a generous gift -- it became a burden because they just couldn't afford it. They weren't wrong, it was just a bad situation all around. It's like buying the dress, when they can't afford to go to the ball.

I sympathize with this position that she might just really not be able to afford it, but she wants you to pay for the ball and for the ball next door, LOL.

But it is still a deluxe hotel stay in Central Florida. They don't have to go to the parks, lots of people do resort stays only. They could have rented a car and gone to the beach or one of the hundreds of other things there is to do there.

 

[Donnainnj]

You might want to sneak the book "You Need A Budget" or a Dave Ramsey book into her shower gift. I think they will need it.

 

[tzolkin]

But it is still a deluxe hotel stay in Central Florida. They don't have to go to the parks, lots of people do resort stays only. They could have rented a car and gone to the beach or one of the hundreds of other things there is to do there.

Yup. My parents had some DVC points that were going to expire in September before they could use them so my husband and I had a lovely 5 night stay at the Polynesian. We did not rent a car so we just spent the entire time relaxing and checking out the various lounges at the resorts and Disney Springs. Used credit card points for the plane tickets, so our largest expense was all the mugs we bought at Trader Sam's.

I can understand how that may not be considered a "Disney vacation" without the parks, but it was very enjoyable for us and I would have been thrilled if that was gifted for our honeymoon.

 

[sam_gordon]

But apparently that wasn’t enough because a week ago she contacted me, saying they can’t really afford park tickets and there’s no point in going without them. Could we get their tickets too??

I thought some more about this. I wish I would have been quick enough on my feet to answer... "I'm sorry you won't be able to use our gift. We'll allow someone else to use that time and find you a different gift for your wedding. We want you to enjoy what we get."

 

[sk!mom]

If the newlyweds stay at the "right" hotel in Universal they can include freebie park tickets, so why should they remain at GF for the additional days?

Very true, could you please give that as your gift? Oh, and go ahead and cover transfer costs as well.

I’m speechless at the audacity. I would stop answering texts from her.

 

[disney-inspired]

I respectfully disagree. I don't think this is an issue of dumb or naive - the latter simply implies not having knowledge of something. We've all been young, dumb and naive.

But this is next-level rudeness plain and simple - I don't care if her perception was that OP paid nothing, got it free herself...doesn't matter. It. Was. A. Gift.

Everyone from age of 4 years old and up should know to simply say "thank you" for ANY gift - whether you like it, don't, can use it, cannot use it, wanted more or simply hate it.

You NEVER ask for more. If the failure to understand this basic kindergarten lesson is now considered natural for all young adults as "young and naive", lordy help us all.

By the way: I ADORE these community threads and reading everyone's responses - thanks OP! They perk up my day, give me a laugh or two. - sometimes they give me extra patience or appreciation when my own family does something to drive me nuts.

Yes, this is something that has come up with my younger niece and it has resulted in her not getting anything sometimes and I had the support of her parents LOL

 

[kymom99]

I have a niece that I’m close too. She can be very aggressive about trying to get things she wants. I love her dearly but I have to set boundaries. We were working on an excavation project. We had a pile of dirt and she wanted us to give it to her for her yard. Then after enough times telling her I didn’t know if we would be using it she stopped. Then she said she needed some buckets of dirt to fill a hole her son dug in her yard. Kept bugging me. No, go to Lowe’s and make your son buy a bag of topsoil with money out of his piggy bank. Seriously, some people think if you have something they should just ask you to give it to them.

 

[disneydreamer1980]

To the OP, Is there any chance last min things going wrong and they decide not to go to disney, and you'll be stuck with points in holding.

I hadn’t thought about that!

 

[HopperFan]

To the OP, Is there any chance last min things going wrong and they decide not to go to disney, and you'll be stuck with points in holding.

I hadn’t thought about that!

OH this very well could happen based on what you have shared. It sounds like she won't be satisfied with a honeymoon in a lovely location. She wants more days, she wants Disney tickets, she wants Universal tickets, she'll need Universal nights .... what if she doesn't get all those things? What if she can't afford plane tickets or all the budget for dining etc? Will she just not go, leave things hanging for you?

 

[WDWJDS]

It sounds to me as if she sees your timeshare as sort of a vacation home that you own somewhere, as in when you aren’t there, it just sits empty So your wedding gift offer was actually worth/cost you nothing.

And, she may have thought that Disney timeshares come with entrance to the parks, like you had annual passes that you could also allow her to use and that’s why she asked for that.

 

[marthachick]

I just hope she doesn’t have any siblings. They will expect this too.

 

[RedAngie]

To the OP, Is there any chance last min things going wrong and they decide not to go to disney, and you'll be stuck with points in holding.

Are there financial penalties or other demerits for no shows/last minute cancellations?

If not, I’m guessing it would be the same situation as any other unused gift.

 

[gmi3804]

Are there financial penalties or other demerits for no shows/last minute cancellations?

If not, I’m guessing it would be the same situation as any other unused gift.

Yes, they’ll lose the points they could’ve used, or rented out for quite a bit.

 

[wabbott]

What an interesting thread. What about the poor schnook who is marrying her? He can't be very smart. He's gonna get some abrupt life lessons real quick.

 

[jeff_h]

I can't believe how inconsiderate the OP was (and I didn't see it mentioned by others either), forgetting to include Disney Gift Cards so these people could get something to eat! Just willing to let them go hungry, geez how selfish...

I'm kidding, of course. I also had a similar situation but don't remember the details since it was many years ago, maybe the OP can buy me some of those jellyfish memory supplements... sorry OP that the relatives acted like that.

 

[jo-jo]

I just hope she doesn’t have any siblings. They will expect this too.

Now that you mention it, I think I might be a 12th cousin twice removed on my great great great grandfather's side. Can I get a week too???? Next year will be our 45th anniversary.

 

[gmi3804]

Now that you mention it, I think I might be a 12th cousin twice removed on my great great great grandfather's side. Can I get a week too???? Next year will be our 45th anniversary.

Every person on earth is genetically related, or can trace their lineage, to every other person by less than something like 60 degrees. The mad news for me is that I’m related to those who started and/or replied to the “What color socks did you wear yesterday?” thread here on the DIS.

 

[Mackenzie Click-Mickelson]

Every person on earth is genetically related, or can trace their lineage, to every other person by less than something like 60 degrees. The mad news for me is that I’m related to the dolts who started and/or replied to the “What color socks did you wear yesterday?” thread here on the DIS.

Inane threads are easily ignored. Not really a need for insults or rude comments about who participates in them.

 

[Jack Kerouac]

What an interesting thread. What about the poor schnook who is marrying her? He can't be very smart. He's gonna get some abrupt life lessons real quick.

I remember when I met my future brother.-in-law. He's a nice guy, he's smart, but he has a difficult time thinking beyond himself. When he said he was married, I thought she must be a saint to deal with him and his idiosyncrasies. After meeting her and seeing her own idiosyncrasies, it seems to me they could both do better. Maybe the same is true in this case.

 

[Jack Kerouac]

Having just bought our first DVC contract this year and having our first trip planned for August 2023, this thread has made me wary of being generous with our points. It seems some people believe what you are offering them has no value, they may feel burdened by the sheer amount of other costs of a WDW vacation, or worse, they have their hand out for you to cover those costs as well. So far the only people we have invited to join us were my in-laws and they quickly declined. I think we will have to think long and hard about inviting anyone else in the future.