Ideas for organization-challenged friend

[happybratpack]

I'm trying to put together a quick gift bag for a friend, she's the queen of procrastination and is completely unorganized. She's gotten involved in a few projects that are really going to require her getting a grip on everything. Soo, we're going out for girls night tonight and I'm trying to go at lunch to get her some goodies.

All I can think of so far is a purse organizer w/ calendar, contacts, etc. Any other ideas??? Something you might use to stay organized?

Thanks!!

 

[TriMom]

Tread VERY carefully here. Did she ask for you help in getting organized? How close of a friend is she? You do realize that getting a gift bag of organizational stuff can easily be seen as a backhanded insult. It is a passive aggressive way of saying - I don't think you have your stuff together.

I'm not saying that this will happen. She very well could be overjoyed with your gift. Just spend a minute thinking about how your friend will feel.

All of my friends who would not be hurt from that sort of present are the friends who I can look straight in the eye and say "You have a big project, get your stuff together. Do you need any help?"

The friends who I felt I would have to present them a gift would be hurt by the gift.

As always - YMMV

 

[minkydog]

Tread VERY carefully here. Did she ask for you help in getting organized? How close of a friend is she? You do realize that getting a gift bag of organizational stuff can easily be seen as a backhanded insult. It is a passive aggressive way of saying - I don't think you have your stuff together.

THis was my thought, too. Unless she has specifically asked for your help, you might want to rethink this idea. Just because she may have alluded to her own lack of organization doesnt mean she wants you to step in and rescue her. As someone who has struggled with organization through the years I have to tell you that what works well for someone else often doesn't work for me. A gift bag full of desk supplies would just tick me off.

OP, I think a better plan would be to have a face-to-face conversation with her and find out what SHE thinks would be helpful. Most people have pretty good insight as to why they do things, they just need someone to listen while they talk out their ideas. Now, *that* is my idea of a great friend!

 

[happybratpack]

We've had a long talk about it, she's expressed interest in organizational "tools" but said she doesn't even know where to start. I know she wanted an organizer like mine. That's what gave me the idea to start with, but now I'm unsure if it's a good idea after reading your posts.

Thanks for the insight.

 

[lovemygoofy]

Why not get some ideas for organization and then tonight go and show her the things that you think would help her?

Honestly you can give her things all day long and even write it down but unless she makes an effort to be organized it won't do any good to just buy her some things.

 

[mamacatnv]

We've had a long talk about it, she's expressed interest in organizational "tools" but said she doesn't even know where to start. I know she wanted an organizer like mine. That's what gave me the idea to start with, but now I'm unsure if it's a good idea after reading your posts.

Thanks for the insight.

I'd get her an organizer like yours, no more, no less and leave it at that.

IMO a procrastinator is a procrastinator and no organizer is going to fix that. I am a huge procrastinator, I know this about myself but I always get the job done and done well.

I have friends that are super organized to the point I think they drive themselves crazy. I am kind of the opposite and yet we generally reach the finish line together.

 

[TriMom]

We've had a long talk about it, she's expressed interest in organizational "tools" but said she doesn't even know where to start. I know she wanted an organizer like mine. That's what gave me the idea to start with, but now I'm unsure if it's a good idea after reading your posts.

Thanks for the insight.

OK to me that falls into the friend who I can look in the eye category. I would get her an organizer like yours, and then spend some time with her showing her how you use it to stay organized.

 

[minkydog]

OK to me that falls into the friend who I can look in the eye category. I would get her an organizer like yours, and then spend some time with her showing her how you use it to stay organized.

I agree. But OP, be prepared for the possibility that it won't "take." Many people can't seem to adapt to someone else's great ideas for organization. They have to try several things until they find the ones that fit. My DH has tried for years to get me to use a PDA or cell phone to schedule my appointments. I simply don't think that way. I hate technology. Pen and paper works much better for me. I carry a medium size daytimer in my purse. It helps me greatly to see a month at a glance so I can gauge how many activitied to cram into one week/month. My Dh rolls his eyes and calls me old school, but it works very well for me.

 

[diznygirl]

Just a warning - like Minkydog said, it just might not "take." I tried helping who was like yours - went to her house, organized, set up a database, labeled things - it never worked. She wanted the help, but she's not wired for it I guess.