JULY 5TH PART THREE: SAFAAAAAAAARI
Once we finished walking the Pangani Trail, it was time to use our Kilimajaro Safaris Fastpasses. WOO WOO SAFAAAAARI! SAFAAAARI!
But first, I made everyone wait while I ran to the restroom.
Then, I made everyone wait even longer while I admired the artwork outside of the restroom.
Look, its an advertisement for the Harambe Wildlife Reserve! Again, I cannot believe it took me so long to appreciate AK. I feel like such a failure of a Disney fan.
Hanging my head in shame, I headed back to rejoin the family and we got in line for Kilimanjaro.
Heres my Golden Ticket:
It didnt come with chocolate. Bummer. I'm of the belief that
everything should come with chocolate.
The rules:
I dont really know what this sign is talking about because birds clearly deserve to be disturbed. I mean, they disturb me, so I think its only fair that I disturb them back.
Heres a bunch of people standing in line:
Doesnt it feel like youre standing right there? I can just feel the 8000 degree heat and smell the lovely wafts of body odor. Ah, Disney
Foreshadowing...
Im not entirely sure what the prop hose is for. Showering? Throwing it at someone and yelling SNAKE? Hosing down the safari vehicle? It certainly doesn't look like anyones gotten around to that in quite some time.
Anyway, we climbed aboard our safari vehicle (my parents and I were in the front row) and were introduced to our wonderful driver, Kayla (I think). She was blonde, perky, and quite fabulous. She really knew her stuff, too, which was nice. Boring drivers who have no idea what theyre talking about are no fun.
We were kept in a weird holding pattern for a few minutes, but then we were off into the Harambe Wildlife Reserve for two weeks in the WILD!
We called Wilson (who is the opposite of Seeker in that I actually like him) and he said SIMBA ONE which is a phrase oft repeated by my family. We cant mention the Animal Kingdom without someone yelling JAMBO or SIMBA ONE. They're just so fun to say! JAMBO, SIMBA ONE!
Our first animal encounter was with the Black Rhino:
It bears a slight resemblance to those diseased dinosaurs I pointed out earlier. Thankfully, we know its not diseased because its tongue is still inside its mouth.
Up next, we saw the hippos:
I wonder why they always stay smushed together in a hippo heap. Is it just because they enjoy a good cuddle? If so, we have that in common.
The Nile Crocodiles (as opposed to the American we saw earlier) are in here somewhere, I think:
Or maybe theyre not. I dont know. Theyre in the general vicinity. They might have avoided the photo. Id imagine these bad boys arent nearly as vain as the American Crocodiles.
After all the Sitting Around animals, it was Savannah Time! This is my absolute favorite part of the Safari. Its absolutely gorgeous. I mean, its just so open. The animals are wandering about and for a little while, I genuinely forget Im at a theme park in Florida. It is truly magical.
The tiny Thompson's Gazelles are so cute!
Spiraled horns!! Its like theyre African Unicorns...with two horns.
If you read my TR from 2010, you may remember that I had quite the memorable giraffe experience. WE MADE EYE CONTACT, GUYS. I bonded with a freakin' giraffe. Because of that, I was a bit apprehensive about seeing them again. I mean, short of a giraffe licking me on the face, it couldnt possibly get any better. I just
really hoped it wouldnt be super lame. What if seeing a giraffe had become about as exciting as seeing a squirrel on my walk to class? I wouldnt know what to do with myself.
Thankfully, all my worrying was for naught. Seeing the giraffes still made the part of me that is eternally four years old (which is all of me) freak out.
Our driver stopped the vehicle for a bit so that we could watch this guy. Giraffes always seem so calm and gentle. I feel like theyre the yoga instructors of the animal world. Do they even get angry? Im assuming they're not all 'STOP THE VIOLENCE' and that theyll fight back if a predator attacks, but how?
OK, Ive gotta look this up.
Do you think searching for angry giraffes on
Youtube will work?
Yep. Found one. It says Excellent Footage in the title. This should be good.
Alright, two giraffes are standing next to each other. Everything seems fine. Wait, theyre bending down. They're basically bowing down Buckbeak-style except Harry Potter isn't standing across from them.
OH MY GOD. OH MY GOD.
Theyre like slamming their necks into each other repeatedly.
Ugh, the sounds. THE SOUNDS. DEAR GOD THIS IS HORRIBLE. THEY JUST KEEP WHIPPING THEIR NECKS AROUND. AAAAHHHHHHH!!!
Whoa, OK, theyre taking a break now. Their little ears are twitching. I would normally find this adorable, but right now I'm incapable of such thought.
OH CRAP THEYRE BOWING AGAIN. THEYRE BOWING AGAIN. THIS CANNOT BE GOOD.
THE SLAMMING. OMG THE SLAMMING. IT LOOKS LIKE THEYRE GOING TO KNOCK EACH OTHERS HEADS OFF. THIS IS TOO MUCH OMG IM PAUSING THE VIDEO.
DEEP BREATHS, KARA. DEEP BREATHS. It's not like a giraffe neck is going to come flying out of the computer screen. This is not a 3D movie.
OK, Im starting it again. Theyre slowly walking now, right next to each other. It's like they're attached at the hip. OH NO THEYRE BOWING. OH GOD MORE SMACKING. MORE SMACKING. ONE ALMOST SWEPT THE HIND LEGS OUT FROM UNDERNEATH THE OTHER ONE. IT'S LIKE THEY'VE SEEN THE KARATE KID OR SOMETHING. THIS IS INSANE.
The guy filming this just asked if they ever kill each other by doing this! OH MY GOD! NO ONE ANSWERED. I BET THAT MEANS THEY DO. WHAT AM I WATCHING??? THIS WAS A MISTAKE! A MISTAKE!!!!!!
........
OH THANK GOD ITS OVER.
Well, I think Im scarred for life now. Yikes. That was quite intense. Thank goodness I have never had the displeasure of seeing that in person.
We now know that giraffes do get mad though, so YAY LEARNING, I guess.
I need some serious cheering up after that. Thankfully, I have a fun little anecdote to share. While we were watching the giraffes, a little boy sitting behind us loudly piped up, saying, Mom, theyre tall enough to go on ALL the rides! I almost started crying. He was just so earnest. He had this Of course the animals go on the rides because were in Disney World, silly tone in his voice. It was precious. I wanted to sit down with him and discuss just how awesome animals are.
CONTINUED IN NEXT POST~