JULY 5TH PART TWO: He Kinda Looks Like My Uncle Phil
After leaving our dinosaur friends (and that jerkface Seeker) behind, we headed to the magical land of Africa.
Where there wont be snow this Christmas. The greatest gift theyll get this year is life.
Lia, Jess, and anyone else headed down soon, Im gonna need you to FEEEEEED THEEEE WOOOOOORRRRRRLLLLLLLLLD (LET THEM KNOW ITS CHRISTMASTIME). Thanks.
See, its Africa:
I have an inordinate fondness for those big block letters. I am such a nerd.
I love this view. I mean, youre in Florida and its 90 degrees and theres enough sweat pouring out of your body to run Splash Mountain, but theres a freaking snow-capped mountain in the distance. It just doesnt get any better than that.
The architecture back here is AMAZING. Its so detailed. My eyes get quite the workout jumping from awesome thing to even more awesome thing. I wish I had more time to fully absorb all the little details. As you may have heard, "There's far too much to take in here. More to find than could ever be found."
Hey, more cacti! I guess it was just a water-conserving plant kind of day.
Heres our destination:
Kilimanjaro Safari!
The posted wait time was 45 minutes, so, instead of standing in line, we grabbed FPs that would be usable in an hour and did something weve never done before The Pangani Trail.
As many of you know, Im a recent Animal Kingdom convert. We had quite the love/hate relationship for some time. Ive always loved Festival of the Lion King and all of the rides, but I never truly enjoyed the park like some people do. It was always ridiculous hot/crowded/claustrophobia-inducing and I just wanted to go back to the resort.
That all changed in 2010.
It was like I had some sort of awakening. The gardens were 10 times as beautiful. The foliage-lined paths werent nearly as stifling. Primeval Whirl made me laugh harder than ever. The paper straws didnt turn into sopping wet messes. I didnt feel like I was standing 3 feet away from the sun. Well, I did, but I didnt let it bother me. I met the characters in their safari garb. I noticed just how fabulous the area music is. GIRAFFES CAME RIGHT UP TO OUR SAFARI VEHICLE AND I ALMOST CRIED BECAUSE IT WAS ONE OF THE COOLEST EXPERIENCES OF MY LIFE.
It was perfect.
So, going into this trip, I was really excited about our day at the Animal Kingdom. I mean, two years ago, I wouldnt have even entertained the thought of spending my birthday there. I disliked it that much. But this year, I knew I wanted to do all of the things I was too Ugh, can we just go back to the hotel now? to experience before, so that is what we did.
Gorillas! Hippos! Yay!
Im sorry to say that the first half of our journey wasnt very well documented. I guess I was just so into the experience that I ignored my camera. Whoops.
But first, a warning:
There
are buffalo roaming free throughout this trip report. Be careful. I wouldnt want to lose any of you in a stampede.
First up on the trail was the Endangered Animal Rehabilitation Center. According to AllEars, the Angolan Black and White Colobus Monkey live here. I wouldnt know because we didnt actually see them. They were all hiding. We did hear them, though, thats for sure. Those babies are LOUD.
Up next, we saw the Okapi. These are the giraffe relatives with zebra-striped legs you practically always see on Kilimanjaro Safari. We didnt stay and look for long for that very reason.
We moved onto the Research Center:
This building is home to several smaller animals lizards, hedgehogs, and, for fans of Kim Possible, Naked Mole Rats. Boo-yah. There were a gazillion people bunched up in front of their exhibit, though, and we didnt feel like waiting forever, so we moved on. I was really looking forward to busting out the Naked Mole Rap, too. Bummer.
What is that? That freaky thing?
Yes, thats right, its a Naked Mole Rat.
Come on, yall. Let the girls sing,
Listen to the Naked Mole Rap.
Moving on
The aviary is attached to the Research Center. I wish I could tell you more about it, but I sprinted through and waited for my family at the other end. You know me, I dont do birds.
The hippos were up next. We couldnt see them very well because they were sleeping towards the back of their tank, but it was still cool to see them underwater.
Hippo artwork:
A Hippo skull:
Those teeth are HUGE.
The next viewing area housed some sort of antelope that could stand on its hind legs (cool) and meerkats! Mom and I are big meerkat fans. We watched Meerkat Manor religiously and we frequently burst out into that Dig a Tunnel song from The Lion King 1 ½.
QUICK BEFORE THE HYENNA COMMMMMMMMMMME.
Finally, the moment youve all been waiting for: we saw the gorillas. And we took lots of pictures. It was awesome.
We walked through the indoor viewing area first. There was only one gorilla in here and he or she was curled up in the hay.
Its so fuzzy!
The Aggression Stance photo cracked me up:
We headed back outside and crossed a bridge to the outdoor viewing area:
As you can see, it was quite crowded and people were really loud.
Thankfully, that didnt stop the gorillas from hanging out with us:
There were two. This guy was chomping away on some leaves. He was incredibly photogenic. There was another that was just chilling further into the woods. I joked that it was Big Foot. We should have taken a bunch of grainy photos and tried to sell them to the History Channel. Im sure there will be an episode of Ancient Aliens all about how Big Foot is really the descendant of an ancient alien. I mean, we cant prove that he isnt so
.
Anyway, here are a bunch of pictures of a gorilla eating. Im sure yall experienced something similar around the dinner table yesterday.
He was picking the leaves off the stem. It was rather adorable.
I was equal parts amazed and creeped out by just how human-like they are. I mean, Im quite certain I make that exact face all the time.
Just chompin' away...
LOOK! Hes smiling! How freaking adorable is that?
Allow me to draw your attention to his foot. In case we ever need more proof that evolution is actually a thing, I have gorilla feet. Theyre not
exactly the same, of course, but when compared to other humans, I have a rather large gap separating my big toe from the rest of them. I mean, my big toe isnt a foot-thumb like that of a gorilla, but the gap is noticeable. It creeps people out. Especially when I use my toes to grab stuff.
So, anyway
The gorilla exhibit was beautiful. Even without the gorillas, I would have been happy to spend time taking everything in.
Being a gorilla at the Animal Kingdom really doesnt seem like a bad gig. I know there are some strict anti-zoo people out there, but this kinda seems like paradise. Tons of food and room to move around, pretty views, no predators to worry about, and tons of stupid humans to make fun of. Theres no way real Africa is better than that. No way.
UP NEXT: Were four-wheelin now, baby.
But only on family vacations haha. Kristen doesn't let me sleep past 7. 
But really. They are.
So classic. I miss that version of Stace.
hahaha thanks but we made it.. with NO THANKS TO YOU! 
You always update when I'm having a bad day and then my day instantly gets better. GOOD JOB! 
Carmen Sandiego. I always wanted to be on that show!
haha
I love our country but I don't like cheap beer, redneck jokes, hunters, or NASCAR. I do, on occasion, enjoy KFC. But not the Double Down. Never, ever the Double Down. Our local KFC is actually a KFC/Taco Bell, though, so I do have an awfully good time there.
(I'm so glad I finally have an excuse to use that smiley.)
