I am so sorry if I was ever smug

[labdogs42]

It is nice to see this kind of post. I had a pretty easy first year with DS, but I never got to the smug point. Good thing I didn't because as soon as that boy could walk, he was a handful! We bought a special lock for the diswasher and one for the oven, too. We gave up on trying to keep him off things, so we let him climb on the couch and jump on the cushions. I can only say"no" so many times a day! I agree with whoever menioned that redirection is what you need to be doing for that age. Ignoring bad behavior isn't going to cut it most of the time.

My son is 5 now and he's finally a little more manageable. If I had one of those "perfect" easy" kids, maybe he'd have a sibling. As it stands, we are sticking with one and done for now! This kid has humbled us enough! And yes, 3 is way worse than 2! Sorry!

 

[Legendofthehawk]

Ahh yeah. Buckle your seatbealt, the terrible threes are grrreat-- so great, we got into them early! DD skipped the terrible twos altogether, and some days I really want to sell her to the circus. The temper tantrums, especially the public ones, where she knows people are watching her-- oh they're just the *best.*

Yesterday she for some reason wanted an egg-- she doesn't even like eggs, she just wanted an expired one from the fridge that I didn't even know I had. 5 mins later, I hear the fridge open... there she is, egg in hand. I tell her to give me the egg, when I said NO I meant NO... well she threw the egg. SPLAT.. all over the floor. That was pretty... my blood was boiling!

The thing that I don't understand is the parents that have the "perfect" children that appear to be perfect in all situations, what the heck are they doing to those kids at home?!? a dungeon?! shackles?!

maybe? lol

 

[SunshineOR]

That's a cute post! At least you got a chance to feel smug as a parent, some of us started out with and continue to battle a difficult child from day 1. Never got a chance to feel like a good parent.

My crow-eating comes from all the smug things I said when I was a high school teacher before I was a parent. I am so sorry and feel so awful for all the times I blamed parents for every stupid thing some teen did. "My kid will never...", "if the parents would just turn off the tv and pay attention then little Johnny wouldn't be like this...", etc. I was pretty good at teaching and operating under a mistaken assumption that those skills would somehow translate into great parenting. Um, managing to get a kid to sit and pay attention for one hour has nothing to do with raising kids 24/7 and their behavior when they're out of your hands at school all day! I was given a child who has shown me the error of my ways and humbled me completely.

I have one more year until my most difficult child makes her grand entry into the school where I once sat in the staff lounge making these grand declarations. I will hang my head and shuffle into conferences burning red with shame should anyone remember anything I said about my future kids and future parenting skills.

 

[nmmom95]

My DS6 was the easiest baby. Boy, did that change. He has a VERY strong personality now. MY DS12, who was the most difficult baby ever is now a piece of cake.

 

[minkydog]

That's a cute post! At least you got a chance to feel smug as a parent, some of us started out with and continue to battle a difficult child from day 1. Never got a chance to feel like a good parent.

My crow-eating comes from all the smug things I said when I was a high school teacher before I was a parent. I am so sorry and feel so awful for all the times I blamed parents for every stupid thing some teen did. "My kid will never...", "if the parents would just turn off the tv and pay attention then little Johnny wouldn't be like this...", etc. I was pretty good at teaching and operating under a mistaken assumption that those skills would somehow translate into great parenting. Um, managing to get a kid to sit and pay attention for one hour has nothing to do with raising kids 24/7 and their behavior when they're out of your hands at school all day! I was given a child who has shown me the error of my ways and humbled me completely.

I have one more year until my most difficult child makes her grand entry into the school where I once sat in the staff lounge making these grand declarations. I will hang my head and shuffle into conferences burning red with shame should anyone remember anything I said about my future kids and future parenting skills.

My sister is a teacher, too, and she was just full of wisdom for me when I had my first(this was about 12 yrs before she had a baby.) The source of her wisdom was, as she put it, "I have 150 kids a week. I know a few things about raising kids." Uh, no you don't. You have each kid for 30 minutes, not 24 hours. It got even worse when my son was diagnosed with severe ADHD and learning disabilities. I never heard the end of what I was doing wrong and all the herbal and diet remedies that she had read about in some women's magazine.

Then she had her daughter.

Dsis called me, crying, when her daughter was 7. She had just been diagnosed with ADHD. DSis begged my forgiveness, told me that she "knew nothing" and was so very sorry for being an @$$. I accepted her apology gracefully and never said "I told you so." That child has been one thing after another. DSis lets her run the household because it's easier than dealing with the tantrums and rituals that she requires. The child is very poorly behaved, snotty, difficult--no one in the family can stand this precious snowflake. This year she was finally diagnosed correctly with Aspergers, after several years of prodding DSis to have her tested(I have a child with autism--I saw this coming a mile away.) This child is 12 now and has missed YEARS of treatment that might have helped her cope better, and maybe would have had some positive impact on her personality. She is just a miserable, unpleasant person and it's a shame.

 

[Becky2005]

The thing that I don't understand is the parents that have the "perfect" children that appear to be perfect in all situations, what the heck are they doing to those kids at home?!? a dungeon?! shackles?!

My 1st wasn't too bad but certainly easier than my 2nd. The funniest thing is my 2nd started walking at 9 months (almost 10). I remember my MIL telling me my DH walked around that age when I only had DD who wasn't even close to walking at that age. I remember thinking she was a bit old & going senile or something as I didn't think it was possible. THEN I had child #2 who literally had to be moved in daycare out of the infant room into the 18 month old room once he started walking because he would try to climb on the other babies. OOPS! He was just too mobile for the infant room.

Of course, maybe they are lucky and have a child like my 3rd, he really IS the easiest child in the world - almost scary he's so laid back. He has had his moments but I'm convinced someone could beat him up and he would end up saying thank you afterward. He has gotten better but TOO passive is a problem also. I used to get people in awe of how he would just contently stay in the stroller the entire time while the older ones were at lessons for an hour or whatever and he was really little. I always thanked them but did tell them it certainly wasn't anything I did when they wanted to know my secret. I'm convinced he's going to be a spy or PI someday -- he is so quiet you don't even know he's there 1/2 the time but he observes everything.

Then the 4th one came along and I was convinced I would be in the Principal's office lots when he went to school...luckily they have told me he is wonderful at school...not so much with his siblings.