How would you handle this one????

[jp24]

It won't, trust me. The principal isn't going to call the cops about this. He knows about the kids smoking on the grounds, so do the teachers & the teachers have seen it, smelled it & no one has called the cops, ever.

Which is why it continues and why your daughter will continue to be offered drugs in school. The system is broken at your daughter's school, from the top down.

 

[Desnik]

Which is why it continues and why your daughter will continue to be offered drugs in school. The system is broken at your daughter's school, from the top down.

You are absolutely right!

 

[cornflake]

It won't, trust me. The principal isn't going to call the cops about this. He knows about the kids smoking on the grounds, so do the teachers & the teachers have seen it, smelled it & no one has called the cops, ever.

Yeah, except your husband called up and threatened that he'd call the cops if the principal didn't magic the drug problem in a week.

If I were that principal, I'd call the cops and point them to your house, honestly. You want the cops? Here they are - you're the ones with the information, spill it or don't come running to me, you know?

 

[1001 Ghosts]

What an excellent time to once again point out that as long as tobacco (a highly addictive & killer drug with zero medicinal benefits that is also a proven health hazard to those exposed to it's smoke) remains legal in this country, there is absolutely no reason to respect the motivations behind the drug laws of this country.

It's a shame that respect for the policies of this board prevents me from pointing out the extremely obvious flaws in logic unknowingly exhibited by some posters in this thread.

 

[Ginny Favers]

There have been a few responses stating that it's "no big deal" and "this has been going on forever, so who cares?" To me, this attitude and the sentiments in the quote I posted remind me of a collective mindset that if it doesn't affect me directly, why should I care? There was a PP that pointed out that we are apathetic as a group. This is absolutely true. We are raising a generation of me first, apathetic, instant gratification kids. It's just sad.

I, too, am surprised that people are saying, "What's the big deal?"

It's like that commercial "Buzzed driving is still drunk driving." So what if it's not hurting anyone? It's still illegal. And it has the potential to.

People think that as long as it's not them and their family being hurt, it's ok to look away. If it ends up being their family, they can always sue.

 

[jp24]

I don't see the connection with this countries fascination with celebrities and keep your head down and mouth shut attitude. Maybe its because I'm one of those parents who would keep my mouth shut. I'm one of those parents who would thank my lucky stars that my dd said no, and be perfectly happy not going to the principal or the police. I'm one of those parents who wants to make sure my dd knows how to say no when she is pressured to take drugs, but I'm not going to make it my job to contact the parents of the ones doing the pressuring.
I'm also one of the parents who doesn't contribute to Honey Boo's ratings, or even know who the housewives or their husbands are. I am also very concerned with Obamacare, but can't really discuss why on the DIS. My head is very much out of my *** thank you very much.

Look, you seem to think things through before you post, which is a rare quality. If you took my quote to think I was pointing directly at you, I wasn't. My point was that until we change our habits and mindset in ourselves, the problems will continue to get worse. I think you'd have to agree that the drug problem isn't any better than it was 25 years ago. Actually, with the invention of meth (which is really proliferating here in Portland and SW Washington), it's much worse. Until we all have a mindset that it has to be fixed no matter what, it won't be.

Edit - If that means some dumb 8th grade chick with a dime bag that is a repeat offender (according to OP) has to go to jail overnight, be expelled from school and have her college future in jeopardy, then so be it.

 

[Ginny Favers]

What an excellent time to once again point out that as long as tobacco (a highly addictive & killer drug with zero medicinal benefits that is also a proven health hazard to those exposed to it's smoke) remains legal in this country, there is absolutely no reason to respect the motivations behind the drug laws of this country.

Um...Tobacco does not significantly impair one's mental state. Maybe if you talked about alcohol... but it is still heavily regulated...

 

[1001 Ghosts]

Um...Tobacco does not significantly impair one's mental state.

Take them away from a smoker for a couple of days, observe their behavior, and then try to repeat that with a straight face.

 

[jp24]

What an excellent time to once again point out that as long as tobacco (a highly addictive & killer drug with zero medicinal benefits that is also a proven health hazard to those exposed to it's smoke) remains legal in this country, there is absolutely no reason to respect the motivations behind the drug laws of this country.

It's a shame that respect for the policies of this board prevents me from pointing out the extremely obvious flaws in logic unknowingly exhibited by some posters in this thread.

Um...Tobacco does not significantly impair one's mental state. Maybe if you talked about alcohol... but it is still heavily regulated...

I get where he's going with it. Big tobacco is ridiculous. If we had a big pot cartel protecting their industry, we wouldn't be having this discussion. Tobacco is a killer, pure and simple. But it's legal and will probably always be legal.

Whether or not we respect the motivations behind the drug laws, the are still drug laws and must be respected until they are changed. If not, you suffer the consequences. It's no different than speeding. You can choose to speed (which I do on a regular basis), but you run the risk of getting pulled over (which I have 5 times in my life). You play on the wrong side of the law and you can pay for your decision. Another thing I drum into my kids' heads.

 

[luvmy3]

Look, you seem to think things through before you post, which is a rare quality. If you took my quote to think I was pointing directly at you, I wasn't. My point was that until we change our habits and mindset in ourselves, the problems will continue to get worse. I think you'd have to agree that the drug problem isn't any better than it was 25 years ago. Actually, with the invention of meth (which is really proliferating here in Portland and SW Washington), it's much worse. Until we all have a mindset that it has to be fixed no matter what, it won't be.

I know it wasn't directed at me personally, although I am in that group of parents you are talking about. My point was those things you mentioned are not mutually exclusive to those with the say nothing attitude.

 

[Colleen27]

I'm shocked that you don't see the connection.

It's our "keep your head down and mouth shut" collective attitude that has this country going in a really bad direction. Is this girl's nickle bag of pot the cause of all our problems? Of course not, but our reaction to it is a symptom of a bigger problem.

I agree, but not in the way you think. The approach to pot in our legal system is a clear illustration of the root problem in our society - legislation via emotion rather than rationality, fear-mongering and misinformation to drum up public support, and when that support fails total disregard for the will of the people. What we have right now is 50 years of escalation against a very minor societal problem, the result of which is the largest prison population (per capita) in the developed world and a permanent economic underclass serving a sentence that far exceeds any time they might serve as well being entirely disproportionate to the seriousness of their offense. But in our culture, the cries of "Think of the children!" outweigh all logic or reason so we just keep piling on stiffer and stiffer penalties for a crime that even our last three presidents have committed.

 

[jp24]

I agree, but not in the way you think. The approach to pot in our legal system is a clear illustration of the root problem in our society - legislation via emotion rather than rationality, fear-mongering and misinformation to drum up public support, and when that support fails total disregard for the will of the people. What we have right now is 50 years of escalation against a very minor societal problem, the result of which is the largest prison population (per capita) in the developed world and a permanent economic underclass serving a sentence that far exceeds any time they might serve as well being entirely disproportionate to the seriousness of their offense. But in our culture, the cries of "Think of the children!" outweigh all logic or reason so we just keep piling on stiffer and stiffer penalties for a crime that even our last three presidents have committed.

I am on record as saying that there is absolutely no reason that marijuana isn't legal. If the government were to legalize, regulate and tax the hell out of it, it solves a ton of problems in this country. There is absolutely no evidence that marijuana is addictive, causes cancer and bad for you in any way (unlike tobacco). Actually, it helps with pain and could replace Vicodin, percocet, etc. However, as long as special interest groups, big tobacco and Fizer are allowed to buy legislation on Capitol Hill, nothing is going to change. Do I smoke it? Nope. Do I want my kids smoking it? Not now and not until they're old enough to make an informed decision (at that time it's out of my hands). However, it opens up new revenue streams and takes pressure off of local police. It's absurd that this isn't legal. But whether it's legal or not, it has no business being in our schools...just like alcohol.

 

[michellev]

It won't, trust me. The principal isn't going to call the cops about this. He knows about the kids smoking on the grounds, so do the teachers & the teachers have seen it, smelled it & no one has called the cops, ever.

Are you certain that the school has never called the police? I work at a high school and the police are in several times a week. We even have a community liason officer assigned to us.

 

[The Mystery Machine]

My 14yo 9th grade DD texted me from school today to tell me she was offered drugs!

During her art class the girl that sits next to her made a comment that she stunk and needed perfume, so she opens her bag and in it was a bag filled with weed. She asks my DD hey, do you want some? You wanna smoke with me later. My DD replied, "no thanks, I'm good." Then texted me after the class to tell me what had happened. She was a little shaken up and went on to tell me she was scared and it was such a crazy thing she couldn't even believe it happened.

For years I have heard rumors about drugs in the school & some of DD's friends had told me some hair raising stories about the H.S. But, having never had first hand experience I chalked it up to kids spreading rumors and it couldn't have been as bad as they were saying.

When DD started this year in the H.S. she told me that the kids walk into the woods during lunch and smoke pot. She then went on to tell me that the tearchers were aware, joked about it and mentioned smelling it in the school because one of the classes has a window facing the woods. Anyway of course I was dumbstruck but again I let it go and told DD to stay away from the kids doing it.

Then this happens today. I really wasn't sure how to handle it. When I called DH he hung up with me and immediately called the school and spoke to the principal. He told my DH he had just started at the school in Dec and was well aware of the drug problem and said it has actually gotten better since he arrived but admitted more needed to be done. My DH told him he'll give him a week to come up with a plan to end the drugs on school property otherwise he will call the police. He also told him we would help in any way we could. (I'm a SAHM and would totally be willing to monitor the area outside during lunch, I can't believe there isn't even one adult present!) The principal said he'd call my DH next week and apologized and admitted the drug situation was bad. He asked if DD was willing to give names it would help and promised he would never say where he got the info from but DH told him no. He doesn't want her put in that position.

So my question is, how would you handle this? Am I under reacting, did DH over react? Should we, could we do anything else? I just don't know how to proceed.

I will say I am so proud of my DD for saying no and telling me about it!

First off kudos to you dh for telling the principal to "NO" on naming names. Let me tell you that is one thing you do not want to have your dd associated with. Gimmie a break...like the chick with the weed in her purse would not know who told.

Second, good for your dh for being firm. Threatening to call the police is a good start to stopping the smoking in the woods during lunch.

We have police at our schools already so no one is out smoking in school or outside school.

So far at this school they have not brought in the drug dogs but they would if they needed too.

I would say that the worst school was a middle school ages ago. The kids were dealing drugs in class. Teachers knew it. They tried to keep it under wraps so as not to attract attention in the community.

 

[mjkacmom]

I don't think people are saying it's not a big deal, but I think it's just a given, just as it was 50 years ago. I'm preparing my kids for the path, not the path for my children.

I expect my children to be exposed to drugs, alcohol, smoking, sexual situations, bullying, stealing etc. The same with my future grandchildren. My job, as a parent, is to try to educate them, and give them the tools and motivation to make smart decisions.

You can choose to spend your time and energy getting drugs away from other teenagers, or shovel the tide, with the same results.

 

[Andtototoo]

Are you certain that the school has never called the police? I work at a high school and the police are in several times a week. We even have a community liason officer assigned to us.

Agreed -- how do you know the cops haven't been called? Maybe they have and given what you said about the cops winking at underage drinking because they know the parents, maybe the cops are winking at pot smoking because they know the parents too? Or maybe the teachers/principal think it's futile to call the cops given the apparent history of them turning a blind eye.

Basically, if the cops won't take it seriously, then there may be little a principal can do.

 

[sam_gordon]

My #1 concern would be any PHYSICAL backlash against DD for doing so. For those who think the girl should "do the right thing", are you not concerned the "druggie", or her friends, might beat up your child in retaliation?

OP, as far as what I'd do...

I would probably notify school authorities my child was offered drugs not only on school grounds, but in class. Other than that, probably nothing.

Another thought... those who think the girl should turn in her classmate... do you call police when you see someone speeding or running a red light?

 

[jp24]

My #1 concern would be any PHYSICAL backlash against DD for doing so. For those who think the girl should "do the right thing", are you not concerned the "druggie", or her friends, might beat up your child in retaliation?

OP, as far as what I'd do...

I would probably notify school authorities my child was offered drugs not only on school grounds, but in class. Other than that, probably nothing.

Another thought... those who think the girl should turn in her classmate... do you call police when you see someone speeding or running a red light?

My 15 yo is 6'3" 230 and on the football team. He has also been going to Ju Jit Su classes. Pretty sure people at school aren't picking fights with him. To say nothing of the fact that he's pretty popular. My 13 yo is heading in that direction. Very popular, not as thick, but nobody is messing with him.

 

[sam_gordon]

My 15 yo is 6'3" 230 and on the football team. He has also been going to Ju Jit Su classes. Pretty sure people at school aren't picking fights with him. To say nothing of the fact that he's pretty popular. My 13 yo is heading in that direction. Very popular, not as thick, but nobody is messing with him.

I'm glad you have that confidence in your kids. Speaking for my oldest DD (also a Freshman), I don't. To me, it's not worth "doing the right thing" if it results in physical harm to my DD.

 

[topolino]

A teenager with pot on his/her person. Stop the presses!!