How to surprise ASD daughter at Christmas

[twinklestar22]

Yes, I said "suprise' and "ASD" in the same sentence!

My daughter is 8 years old and we are going to WDW at the begining of Feb. We plan on suprising her on Christmas day (gift from Santa) because due to financial constraints, it is going to be a LEAN Christmas. She will not be receiving the usual amount of gifts due to the cost of the trip. This trip will be the BIG present!

That said, we are already dropping clues b/c she needs time to prepare. Suprising her one day or even week before we leave will not work for her. She will need time to research, memorize the maps, familiarize herself with info about the hotel, parks etc. I believe the month between Christmas and our date of departure will be an adequate amount of time for her to prepare and get excited! Yes, she will probably perseverate, but we can handle that.

I am sooo excited for her and I want to present the trip in a special way, a box to open with disney stuff, etc. We will be dining at CRT while at MK so I thought maybe a princess dress but she has sensory issues with "itchy" clothes. We will be staying at WDW on borrowed DVC points do I'm not sure if we will receive Mickey Mail. Any suggestions on how to suprise her in a special way would be appreciated.

 

[tikistitch]

When I worked at The Disney Store, we helped one family prepare a fun way to surprise their kids. They bought a Mickey & Friends PVC (figurine) set and we helped the parents tape messages to the bottom of each figurine. We gave them each a little bag to place each figure in. When all the figures were taken out of the bags and put together and then read aloud, it contained the message:

We are going to Disney World!

The pvc sets run about $10 each and if you open the container and split it up there's probably about 10-12 pieces total inside. If you're able to buy from the store itself and not online explain what you're doing and ask for about 10-15 of the smallest little bag they have. It's a good way to expand the presents under the tree as well as have some fun opening and getting the message across! Maybe get the multi princess pvc set to do this idea?

 

[Patience]

Regarding your daughter's sensitivity to itchy dresses, check out the dresses at My Dress Up Trunk. They are no itch dresses and I know they are popular for kids with sensory issues. Some of the princess dresses are on sale right now ( I know the Belle dress is).

Have fun!

 

[TriciaTurnerRN]

We are trying to come up with an idea to surprise our kids this Christmas too!!! In 2010 we surprised them with a trip to Disney on Christmas morning and it was priceless!! We went to the craft store and bought some letters about 4 inches tall and hid all the letters to "Disney" with clues to where the next one would be found. We scrambled the letters and then when they had all of the letters they had to unscramble it. They came up with sidney and dineys before they finally realized it said. Disney!!! Hope this helped. They had fun trying to find the clues on the Christmas morning scavenger hunt.

 

[SueM in MN]

Love the ideas already suggested.
It might be helpful to know a little more about your daughter.

Another suggestion would be the personalized maps (free) you can order from the official Disney site.
If the link doesn't work, just google PERSONALIZED DISNEY MAPS

They can take a while to come, so if you want them, order soon.

 

[twinklestar22]

Thanks for all the suggestions. I've been trying to come up with ideas for MONTHS and a lot of these suggestions are great! My daughter already knows a lot about Disney from friends and relatives so I know she will "get it."
I will check out that website for dresses. I'm thinking of making an appaointment at BBB for the day we are going to CRT but I want to bring our own dress. The idea of a scavenger hunt sounds great too. I will DEF. get the personalized maps.

As for her ASD, she is pretty HF, verbal and in a mainstream class. Her main issues are sensory, mostly auditory and vestibular. She has transition issues as well. I know she will be able to handle the trip although I expect her to get overwhelmed somewhere around day 2 or 3. We are only going for 5 nights so I think she will be fine. She's never been on a vacation before, never flown either, however, she does fine at our local Six Flags and boardwalk. My main concerns are her sensory issues, especially loud noises and all the music that is piped thru the parks. I plan on bringing ear plugs of some sort. She is also very literal. I will also look into the GAC.

Thanks again!

 

[mayaflysmama]

We just surprised my daughter at the 30 day mark knowing she would need time to process and I'd need time to prepare her for things. She is not ASD, but has her own set of issues so I was not sure how it would go over. Anyway, I went to the dollar store and got a princess balloon and a Mickey one. One I tied to a small plush Mickey and the other to a little Ariel craft set. I places these in a large box and taped it shut, then wrapped the entire box. When she unwrapped it the balloons popped out and tied to one was a card saying, "We are going to Disney World for your birthday!". It took a few minutes to totally process, but all the sudden she squealed, "Happy birthday to me!". Now she is excited and we have some time to plan and prepare her for what to expect since if it isn't EXACTLY like last time she will have issues so it is more like preparing her for something she has never experienced before.

 

[WheeledTraveler]

I don't know how much she likes reading, but my parents surprised my brother and me one Christmas with the coming year's edition of The Unofficial Guide to WDW as the way of letting us know they were taking us to WDW. I think it then took us a good couple hours to believe that they meant it because it's very much not the sort of place my parents generally chose for vacations I know I sat down and read it cover to cover in the week after Christmas. While I was a couple years older than your daughter, it would have worked just as well with me at 8 as it did then. It might be another thing to put in a box, especially if she likes the idea of planning and knowing what all the options are.

 

[SueM in MN]

I would look into the idea of Bibbidi Bobbidi Boutique a bit more and maybe suggest not do it.

The BBB experience involves a lot of sensory stimuli that may not be pleasant for some people:
- brushing and manipulation of the hair
- smells of makeup, hair gel and hair spray
- sounds of application of hairspray, gel and makeup
- the feel of all those products

Most of the hairdos involve a very tight ponytail, a lot of hairspray and gel, glitter and some of the undoes also include a lot of hairpins.

I have an adult niece with Asperger's (HFA). She has never been to BBB, but I know she would not have liked it as a child because of several things.

Even now, she doesn't like other people to manipulate her hair - she says she can feel every hair moving and, since she is not in control of it, it does not feel good to her. She also doesn't like tight hairstyles because she can feel the individual hairs being pulled.
Hairspray and gel smells too strong to her, plus pulls the hair holds it in places it doesn't belong. She also doesn't like the crunchy feeling and can hear crunching as the hair moves (all things she is hypersensitive to that most people would not even register).

She doesn't care for makeup for some of the same reasons - smell and it feels like a mask.

So, you may want to do some more investigating or try some similar things out ahead of going to BBB to see if it is even something she would want to try.

 

[kritter47]

Adult with HF Asperger's here.

To start with the "surprise," approach it carefully. I know my biggest tics with planning/routine/traditions occur around the holidays (my internal sense of stability went absolutely nuts when one of my parent's SO's suggested opening all the presents on Christmas Eve, and I was like 24 then, and I think my worst memory of Christmas was when my aunt, trying to be cute and funny, sent me one big present and 10 boxes with $1 McDonald's gift certificates in them while my sister got 11 small presents - I just did not get it and felt extremely insulted). If she's not used to one big present and a few smaller ones, expect some pushback. Perhaps you can hit a dollar store and get small items to wrap up to make the count seem higher even though the cost is much lower?

As for how to surprise her, remember that most ASD kids don't get subtle (and often struggle with learning delayed gratification - I didn't get that until middle school). You know her best on that, but remember that she may think of the trip as imminent and freak out a bit if it's not specifically laid out. If she's a reader, a book or four (or 10!) would probably go over very well with the additional bonus of helping her plan.

I know I would not have liked BBB until I was too old for it - I hated people pulling on my hair and the smell of hairspray. Again, you know her best there.

Finally, I've pitched this before (and I know many disagree with it, so take it as solely my experience), I do not recommend a GAC if you believe the child can handle it, even if it would make it easier. If she can handle Six Flags, she can probably handle Disney. I can't think of a place in the world that offers more incentive to kids to push through moments of sensory anxiety, which the child can take with them into their regular life. I know that happened for me. I would recommend getting one as an "emergency backup," for lack of a better term, and trying to go without using it as much as you possibly can. But again, that's just me.

Earplugs/muffs sound like a great hedge, but if she's like me, fireworks from the parks will be too much noise even with them. I know there are alternate viewing areas, so you might want to look into those.

 

[CaliKT]

I can't think of a place in the world that offers more incentive to kids to push through moments of sensory anxiety, which the child can take with them into their regular life. I know that happened for me. I would recommend getting one as an "emergency backup," for lack of a better term, and trying to go without using it as much as you possibly can. But again, that's just me.

Love this. We got a GAC as an "emergency backup" for my Aspie son last year (who was six at the time) and were very happy we never had to use it. My son did awesome and surprised us all.

I think it helps, too, that Disney is an amazing place for those who are sensory seekers. With all of the vestibular and proprioceptive input from the various rides, my son was probably more regulated that he is on a typical school day.

 

[Amommy21]

Last year we surprised DS when a box of balloons was delivered from Santa... When the ribbon was untied the balloons rose up and there was a letter from Santa and Mickey ears at the bottom.

 

[ItsNotMuchofaTail]

I am surprising my HFA (PDD-NOS) DD on the morning of the trip for various reasons (a surprise is not ideal for her, but it has to be). I am so nervous. She is also OCD, and GAD. AND, I have to wake her up at 4:45 am on a Saturday. YIKES!

I don't know exactly how I am going to do it yet, and my trip is in a week. I was thinking of giving her a GC and asking if she wants to spend it in WDW or something. She would not like anything to pop out of a box at her, especially at 5 am. I do not think putting her in the car and not telling her anything until we get to the airport will be a good idea for me...oh, she has never been in a plane before either. It will be her 3rd trip to WDW though.

She did not enjoy BBB, and I got her a custom dress instead of a costume.

A friend said to tell her the night before at least, but how do I tell a 9 year old, we are going to WDW tomorroow, now go to sleep????

Sorry if I hijack, but I am getting very nervous about this secret I have kept for 10 months!

 

[buffettgirl]

Does she like puzzles? Clues? I surprised my kids one year with a bit of scavenger hunt where they had to find puzzle pieces to a rebus type/picture puzzle that they put together.

My son doesn't have ASD however, he has to be eased into everything very gently, and so a big SURPRISE wouldn't work well for him. But this was good because for about 30 min he knew something was coming and he had time to work up to the big surprise when he and his sister figured out the puzzle. And in the end I got the best reaction from him rather than a big fat melt down.

 

[Samar]

We will be dining at CRT while at MK so I thought maybe a princess dress but she has sensory issues with "itchy" clothes.

Custom clothing! If you are on FB, there are several shops who make non itchy Princess dresses.