How much longer does this have to go on for Maddy???

[Dan Murphy]

Just wanted to say I'm sorry this is going on, Steph. Feel bad for Maddy.

 

[TarraLee]

More prayers for you and Maddy, Steph. I pray for you guys everyday. Hope something works out soon. You are doing so well at being strong and focusing on what is best for Maddy through all of this. Please keep us posted, and make sure to vent when you need to. There are lots of folks here pulling for you!

 

[zen1]

Stephanie, Just reading about what you and Maddy are going through, it breaks my heart and I am so sorry you both have to go through this pain. You both will be in my prayers. And here is a for you and Maddy.

 

[Maray]

Dear Stephanie,
I am so sorry you and Maddy have to go thru all this BS.
I pray you get full custody of your daughter very soon.

I don't care what his issues are with you, but
He should grow Up and take proper care of Maddy.
It seems he only wants her to spite you.
Give her a gentle hug from us and one for you too.
Hang in there,
things have to be turning your way soon,
I love seeing her beautiful smile on all your posts.

(BTW,when is the hearing?
I have read some of your posts,
but I'm an on and off lurker these days, so I miss alot!
Hope it's soon)
Marilyn

 

[Big V]

 

[Twigs]

 

[jana]

Go see her Pediatrician imediately. They will document it and if they suspect abuse they HAVE to report it. Which makes it better then you reporting it.
As for him talking badly about you to her you can have it put in the custody agreement that he can not then he will be violating a court order if he does. You can also have that he has to provide you with a phone number where you can reach her while he is with him ( including if they go away somewhere). I had to have both of these in my custody agreement with my ex.

 

[shelbyjosh]

Steph, let me ask you...why do you take her back to him?? What will he do? Haunt you, maybe. Maddy's welfare is at question with him. No way in hell would my 2 kids go back to Dad if they were given to me that way. Do what you need to do to get her. No legal fees in the world can put a price on Maddy's safety. I know you hurt for her and you know what is best. Good luck.

 

[NMAmy]

Steph: My heart goes out to you--I've been there and I know how awful it is. I really have no advice except it will eventually get better but it never really goes away completely. My DD is 13 and we still have a lot of back and forth issues--mostly due to my ex's new wife. DD has a lot of guilt placed on her there and since I try to make it as easy for her as possible, I often get the short end of the stick.

Big hugs to you and my best wishes for you and Maddy.

 

[Desiree]

Stepharoonie,

I definatly agree with the others, please take her to her pediatrician so you can get this legally documented. And take the pictures too.

(((HUGS))) to you and Maddy

 

[EsmeraldaX]

I hope you get full custody. I know this is so hard to go through, but make sure you bring this stuff up in court and with your lawyer.

I have a friend (a guy) who is going through hell (can I say hell here?) trying to get full custody of his kids because his ex-wife behaves your your ex.

I am so angry at your ex right now, and I don't even know him. But anyone who puts a new car and a shiny new apartment above the welfare of his child does not deserve custody, IMO.

 

[scarlett873]

always keeping you and little maddy in my thoughts and prayers...

 

[suzannen]

Steph,
I'm so sorry that you and most of all Maddy are having to go through this. And, it always seems to just drag out forever with the hearings and meanwhile, the kids are the ones most upset by it all.

The sunburn is bad - not only painful, but one bad sunburn increases her chance for skin cancer as well. But the fact that he didn't even alert you to it is the most questionable thing. If it was cloudy and he forgot (I'll TRY to give him the benefit of the doubt), then he should have been treating it with lotions and told you about it as soon as she was dropped off.

I went through a divorce and brief custody hearing until both my ex and I stopped the custody battle and settled on joint custody because our main concern was with our DD. Even when we were mad at each other, neither of us would ever do anything to harm or jeopardize her physical and/or mental well-being. We would keep each other informed of every little rashes, illness, cough, nightmares so the other was an informed parent. The fact that your ex doesn't do any of this seems to indicate that Maddy's best interest is not in his heart. I'm SO sorry and hope it works out for you both and SOON!

 

[wendyl]

I'm so sorry Stephanie--I hate to think of the cutest girl on the DIS having to be away from her Mom and dealing with a painful sunburn.

Hope she gets to stay with you soon.

 

[Miss Jasmine]

Sounds like he has primary custody at this point, am I right? If so, I would start thinking about petitioning the court for an emergency hearing to restructure the temporary custody situation, especially since he won't let her call you and you can't call her. Scary situation that needs to be addressed.

 

[SeaShelley]

for you and Maddy! I am praying that you get full custody and that any visitation he may receive be supervised!

 

[dianeschlicht]

I think you need to get Maddy in counseling, and I think the court should get involved with that. If a psychologist sees her and talks with her, they can get her to open up about what is REALLY happening at "Daddy's house". Her not wanting to hug him or go back is a warning sign. PLEASE, see if you can get a psychologist involved. It might help your case.

 

[hockeymom7691]

This must be so upsetting for you. I also would be concerned about the way she "shyed" away from her father.

Hang in there! Hopefully you will get full custody of Maddy very soon!

Hugs to you both!!

 

[Melora]

OH my Gosh ..this just breaks my heart.

My question is why do you keep letting her go back to him??

As I seem to understand it, he has no more legal right than you do to have her..I would never never never let my child go back to something like that..especially if she was asking to be with me.

And if my ex did not let me talk to my child, I would sure make sure that the little thing GOT to talk to me. If he has no real legal grounds for keeping her other than you are worried what he will do, I would keep her no matter what.. my childs welfare and emotional well being are so much more imprtant than anything else! He has no right to be keeping her from where she wants to be. I would be worried that in later days my child would ask me how I let her keep going back someplace like that and not trying to protect me from this horrible man! I would worry that one day he would do something a lot more than just a sun burn!

Please know that I am not trying to be harsh, I just know that I personally would never let my child away from me and into bad circumstances.... no matter what!

 

[jacksonsmom]

I don't know much of the story that is going on, but I just want to say i am so sorry both of you are having to go through this.

I, too, would take pictures of everything, write everything down so you have it for the courts.

I am praying this is over soon & Maddy is where is belongs (away from him) Poor baby

Also if she is saying she doesn't want to go to him, don't make her hug him if she really doesn't want too. There must be some reason she doesn't want to hug her daddy. She needs to have her wishes respected.
I would also think of maybe some counseling for her, sounds like there is some kind of abuse going on, even emotional abuse can scar a child for life .....