How can some people not get why they are overweight?

[Cantw8]

Oh man, I totally disagree! You think anyone binges because "food is good?" If we don't think about why we do what we do ... what's the point of being human, really?

I think the point of being human is to enjoy life not analyze it to death. This isn't dress rehearsal, this is the only chance you get. Do you honestly pick up something that you know you shouldn't eat and say to yourself, "Why am I eating this Krispy Creme. Is it because I had a bad day? Bono didn't ask for my number in the elevator? I didn't get enough love as a child?" or is it just because the friggin' thing tastes good???? It can be that simple.

 

[toto2]

I've stop reading at around page11 because I wanted to hadmy two cent.

One of the complain I have seen mention onthe thread is that eatin healthy is more expensive...

Good health has no price !!!

I gained quite a few pounds is the last few years because of my eatin habits , because of my thyroid gland and because I dont exercise a lot ( exept in the summer where I go to work by Bike , 20km every day !

I love food and I realized that I was trying to simplify my life cooking with pre-prepared stuff. I have stopped all together to buy any prepakaged food of any kind. If I buy premade spagetty sauce , I check the lables and if sugar in the sauce , I dont buy it. I now buy bread that is made without flour ( grains only) , natural peanut butter ( without added oils or sugar) , fruit spread made without sugar, biologic milk , grain feed chicken. Is it more expensive . Yes. But you do eat less of it because it tastes a lot better. The only chocolate i now eat noe is 70% cocao: less sugar , intense chocolate taste ! I eat a lot more fruits. I buy Musuelix cereal with no sugar added. I trow dryes fruits ( with no sugar added in it) for added sweetness and it is delicious.
I am lucky , I love to cook , so it helps a lot.

When ever I am in France ( once every two year) I am amazed that, in this contry that is celebrated for it's food, so few people are obese. But it is because , contrary to here in North America , there is nothing taboo about food. People do enjoy it . The eat a lot less processed food than we do.

When I eat with some friends over there , there is always a first couse , a main course and a dessert ( sometime it is cheese) Always some wine. But they cook there own food ( and they have small kitchens in those Paris appartement , about the size of a cubboard). They eat the bagutte ( white bread) the croissant ( butter dough) for breakfast. But they stop at the market every day to buy fresh products to feed there family. The dont have the familly size anything.

So , since I am lucky anough to have a supermarket on my way home , I sop everyday for my dinner. I Have a magnficient farmers market too , close from home ( if you visit montréal , you really have to visit it !) and i buy a lot of stuff there , when ever I can manage , and do try to buy organicly grown stuff there. More expensive ? yess , but tastier and obviously better for my health.

For those who complain about the price of eating healty , two little thoughts: with the price of doctors in the states , you could actually be saving some money by heating healthy ! and since we do live in a big consummer society , there is a lot of things that we are buying and that we end up not using ( and I do have a lot of those !) we could be eating the good stuff !

 

[dumboiu]

When ever I am in France ( once every two year) I am amazed that, in this contry that is celebrated for it's food, so few people are obese. But it is because , contrary to here in North America , there is nothing taboo about food. People do enjoy it . The eat a lot less processed food than we do.

When I eat with some friends over there , there is always a first couse , a main course and a dessert ( sometime it is cheese) Always some wine. But they cook there own food ( and they have small kitchens in those Paris appartement , about the size of a cubboard). They eat the bagutte ( white bread) the croissant ( butter dough) for breakfast. But they stop at the market every day to buy fresh products to feed there family. The dont have the familly size anything.

Don't forget, the Europeans walk A LOT more than most people do in the US. That also makes a difference.

 

[Caradana]

Cantw8, although I will be checking into Beth-Israel today on suicide watch because stupid Bono failed to ask for my number, ... ha ...

People eat one donut because it tastes good. I had a dee-licious strawberry frosted with sprinkles this morning. Now when women eat 6 donuts at a time, and hide the box and stop the car to throw out the napkins, and then lie about it to their husbands, ... there's a REASON for that. It sure as heck isn't because the donut tastes good. And it's not the ONE donut that puts women into obesity ... it's not lack of exercise ... it's eating to the point where your stomach hurts, and to some degree, it's also hormones.

It's too bad that thinking about why we do what we do takes away from the quality of your life ("life is not a dress rehearsal," ta da, ta da ...) That hasn't been my experience at all ... wait a second, didn't I get pounded LAST week because I might be living life "a little too much?"

 

[whtyger97]

yup! pcos.

The funny thing is my husband was looking at pictures of my as a child and was saying you weren't a fat child (I was always on the heavy side of normal, or 'big boned') and then I realized alot of my weight issues started in hs. So it was jut another thing that all seems to fit. Also I had missed periods in the past, I always attributed it to stress.

 

[palmtreegirl]

How about "I go to work, I pay my taxes, I don't do drugs or drink, but I like to eat. Let me have my vice, thank you?!" At 20/25 pounds overweight, I guess I'm in the obese category. I'm not angry over it, or stressing about it. I'd like to be thinner, but not as much as I like to eat what I want for the most part. I do eat mostly in moderation, but I can't do deprivation, and feel no guilt over that fact.

Good for you Snoopy!

I've finally come to that place in my life but I struggle to keep the mindset constantly, it's probably something that will always haunt me. I'm 5'6 and at one point I weighed 112, I can get really obsessed. I never starved myself or binged & purged, nothing that extreme. I just let what I eat and how much I weighed take over my life But I knew every fat gram & every calorie.

Now I don't even own a scale (DH threw it out!) I know if I did I'd be on it every night and every morning and probably during the afternoon too. I'm not sure how much I weigh now, I know it's nowhere near 112 pounds (thank goodness) and I know I'm not fat. After 2 kids/ 1 C-section I know my tummy will never be how it use to and I've gotten to a point where I'm OK with that.


I like to eat, I enjoy food and I spent way too many years of my life obssessed and depriving myself. Feeling guilty for every thing I put in my mouth-NO MORE! Life's way too short and as long as I'm healthy I'm going to try like heck not worry about it.

 

[Cantw8]

Cantw8, although I will be checking into Beth-Israel today on suicide watch because stupid Bono failed to ask for my number, ... ha ...

People eat one donut because it tastes good. I had a dee-licious strawberry frosted with sprinkles this morning. Now when women eat 6 donuts at a time, and hide the box and stop the car to throw out the napkins, and then lie about it to their husbands, ... there's a REASON for that. It sure as heck isn't because the donut tastes good. And it's not the ONE donut that puts women into obesity ... it's not lack of exercise ... it's eating to the point where your stomach hurts, and to some degree, it's also hormones.

It's too bad that thinking about why we do what we do takes away from the quality of your life ("life is not a dress rehearsal," ta da, ta da ...) That hasn't been my experience at all ... wait a second, didn't I get pounded LAST week because I might be living life "a little too much?"

Well, Dana if it hasn't been YOUR experience, then I must be completely wrong When did I say that thinking about actions takes away from the "quality " of my life? I am not going to ponder over every little thing. Of course someone who eats a box of doughnuts and HIDES the box MAY have a problem. That's not what I am talking about. If I eat a box of doughnuts, it is because I was in the mood for them and they taste good. You can psyco-babble that statement all you want but trust me, it is that simple.

 

[donaldsgal]

I went to the doctors office for a "well woman examine" (get get a bc rx). Now I haven't really been to a doctor in 7 years. I know that I am overweight ( 200+ at 5'4) and expected that the doctor might address this in the visit. I knew there were some this I do 'wrong' dietarily like drink to much pop, but overall my diet wasn't that bad. I just seem like even when I try to cut back, or eat healthier it doesn't help (I'm bad with the exercise but even when I add that not much results). Also I embaressingly started growning hair on my chin.

So imagine my surprise when my doctor asks me if I've had problems trying to lose weight because he thinks I have a medical condition linked to the hair on my chin that might make it hard for me to loose weight. It was so refreshing to me that instead of getting 'yelled at' I was actually given insight into the problem. He also hit on some secondary indicators which I hadn't mentioned as additional symptoms. It was so dead on it was scary, it was like it all makes sense now. People who think weight is only about diet and/or exercise need to understand there are ALOT of factors.

Just out of curiosity, and forgive my nosiness, but was it Poly Cystic Ovarian Syndrome? This is quite common in a lot of women - carrying a majority of the weight in the stomach area, facial hair, inconsistent menstruation... this is me, except no facial hair, but I have friends with this diagnosis and they all fit the Dx to a "t". It's hard to treat the weight until you get on meds to get the PCOS under control first. Doctors and nurses out there (disneySteve?) correct me if I'm wrong on any of this.

ETA - Sorry, should have read further before I threw in what others already wrote. Oh well. I just got to increase my post count.

 

[snoopy]

Good for you Snoopy!

I've finally come to that place in my life but I struggle to keep the mindset constantly, it's probably something that will always haunt me. I'm 5'6 and at one point I weighed 112, I can get really obsessed. I never starved myself or binged & purged, nothing that extreme. I just let what I eat and how much I weighed take over my life But I knew every fat gram & every calorie.

Now I don't even own a scale (DH threw it out!) I know if I did I'd be on it every night and every morning and probably during the afternoon too. I'm not sure how much I weigh now, I know it's nowhere near 112 pounds (thank goodness) and I know I'm not fat. After 2 kids/ 1 C-section I know my tummy will never be how it use to and I've gotten to a point where I'm OK with that.


I like to eat, I enjoy food and I spent way too many years of my life obssessed and depriving myself. Feeling guilty for every thing I put in my mouth-NO MORE! Life's way too short and as long as I'm healthy I'm going to try like heck not worry about it.

Have you turned 40 yet? Thats when it happened to me. I stopped obsessing over my weight and started eating what I wanted, when I wanted. I'm definately a few pounds heavier, but its really not as extreme as you might think. All that suffering and deprivation was definately not worth it.

 

[Teejay32]

One of those charts someone had up here a few pages back....I typed in my 5'10", 170 pounds, and got told I was obese.

Oh, okay then. I don't believe it for a minute, but I guess you're officially a part of the obesity epidemic that's sweeping the country and alarming the world. [I think the chart is wrong.]

I've asked people before, online and IRL, where they see the legions of obese people, and finally someone says "ever been on a cruise?" No, I've never been on a cruise, but I imagine the population on one there looks a lot different than that of Lynn, MA, so give me a break. The people around me don't look a whole lot bigger than they ever did, collectively, but the weight standards seem to be more stringent, for sure. Plus the young girls are a heck of a lot more exposed than we were at that age, like they need that. I hate that I am raising two of these girls in a time when having stick limbs and fake breasts is considered attractive, and the fashion standard seems to be Retro Tramp. Hate it.

Now I'm getting out of here while I still can...

 

[donaldsgal]

Well, Dana if it hasn't been YOUR experience, then I must be completely wrong When did I say that thinking about actions takes away from the "quality " of my life? I am not going to ponder over every little thing. Of course someone who eats a box of doughnuts and HIDES the box MAY have a problem. That's not what I am talking about. If I eat a box of doughnuts, it is because I was in the mood for them and they taste good. You can psyco-babble that statement all you want but trust me, it is that simple.

Okay, forgive my jumping in on this discussion between the two of you, but I have to say I agree with Dana (and not just because I'm a counselor! ) I thought her previous post was well-said; I can only speak for myself, so I hope no one flames me for my thoughts on this subject. Regardless, for me it HAS been the repititious, out-of-control eating that Dana mentioned that has landed me overweight. I'm going to lose the weight, but I'm not going to give up "treats" and "goodies" altogether. Dana lost - what, like 60 or 80 lbs? - and had a doughnut this morning. That proves to me it can be done. Let alone the fact that my mother lost 80 lobs in 10 months by walking 30 minutes a day every day, eating a salad or half a sub for lunch, and taking only one serving of food at dinner. No butter or salt on her baked potato, but bbq sauce for flavor. And she's kept most of it off (regained some due to foot surgery and an inability to walk for 12 weeks, which really cramped her style).

So back to my point... I also agree with what you said, however, in that it's not always some underlying psychological issue that drives us to eat. Sometimes I do have 7 mini powdered donuts because I "can't" seem to eat just one. It doesn't mean I was sat in the corner as a child or that I really believe I'm a space alien. Just means I was craving them. However, when I'm NOT craving them and eat 7 of them, that's a more deeply-rooted issue in my life.

I hope I haven't detracted from the points you were both trying to make. I tend to agree more with Dana on this one - if someone ate the whole box of donuts, hid the box and/or denied it, I would say guilt is feeding that behavior. And we don't feel guilty unless we think there's a reason to, in my experience. So I would say it's not that this person MAY have a problem, as you say - I would contend they DO.

 

[palmtreegirl]

Have you turned 40 yet? Thats when it happened to me. I stopped obsessing over my weight and started eating what I wanted, when I wanted. I'm definately a few pounds heavier, but its really not as extreme as you might think. All that suffering and deprivation was definately not worth it.

I'm 34. I've seen your pic Snoopy and you look great, no need for you to lose weight, that's for sure! I figured that staying one steady weight is a whole lot better then yo-yo dieting, going up/down in weight all the time can't be healthy, right?

 

[snoopy]

I'm 34. I've seen your pic Snoopy and you look great, no need for you to lose weight, that's for sure! I figured that staying one steady weight is a whole lot better then yo-yo dieting, going up/down in weight all the time can't be healthy, right?

Thanks Palmtreegirl! I could definately stand to lose a few, truth be told. The fortunate thing is I'm tall and carry my weight fairly well, and I also have a good metabolism.....trust me, the food nazi people here at the office obsess over what I eat and why I get to eat it and they don't. I do think that not stressing about it does help in the long run though....its when women start stressing over body image that those binge eating in the car like Dana described start happening. Been there, done that, won't go back.

 

[donaldsgal]

I've asked people before, online and IRL, where they see the legions of obese people, and finally someone says "ever been on a cruise?" No, I've never been on a cruise, but I imagine the population on one there looks a lot different than that of Lynn, MA, so give me a break.

Well, I have been on a cruise, and you are correct. I saw there what I see everywhere I go - skinny, thin, just right, pleasantly plump, and obese people. Also, as a point of note, those same skinny, thin, just right, pleasantly plump and obese people were ALL having a grand old time stuffing their faces. I'm not saying everyone was - I'm just saying all populations were represented well at dinner and the buffets.

Shouldn't they invent a smilie shoveling in the food for this thread?

 

[Caradana]

Hi Donaldsgal,

Thanks for the sweet post. I actually lost 35 pounds, maybe a little closer to 40. But yup, I did have a donut this morning. I'm about to head downstairs to get my lunch actually. Food, yumtastic.

D

 

[Crankyshank]

You can have ice cream, chocolate, cookies, donuts, etc.. and lose weight.
Ask any successful dieter who has lost a lot of weight and kept it off and they'll tell you that the surest thing to fail at your diet is to deny yourself the foods you like.

The trick is that you need to have 1 donut and not the box and you can't have a donut for breakfast and an ice cream sundae for dinner. and if you fall off the wagon and have 2 donuts, don't say "screw it I cheated so I might as well have a dozen cookies too"

 

[bananiem]

A few years ago I decided to stop worrying about the NUMBER of the few extra pounds there were and decided to watch what I ate so I could be COMFORTABLE in the style of clothes I wanted to wear. I didn't lose much weight.
Last September I cut out my lunch time pop and I've lost the 10 pounds I'd wanted to lose, fairly quickly. Coincidence? It's the only thing I changed.
I also realize that even if I got back to my college weight of 115 I'd still have bumps and bulges. I'm nowhere near as active and the body isn't toned. So that's where I got the idea to be comfortable in the style clothes I want to wear.

 

[Miss Jasmine]

You can have ice cream, chocolate, cookies, donuts, etc.. and lose weight.
Ask any successful dieter who has lost a lot of weight and kept it off and they'll tell you that the surest thing to fail at your diet is to deny yourself the foods you like.

The trick is that you need to have 1 donut and not the box and you can't have a donut for breakfast and an ice cream sundae for dinner. and if you fall off the wagon and have 2 donuts, don't say "screw it I cheated so I might as well have a dozen cookies too"

EXACTLY!

 

[disneysteve]

There are many reason's for being overweight and not every overweight person eats unhealthy food.

I think a few people are joining the thread late and missed the point of the original topic. My original point was discussing how best for a physician to interact with people who are obese but don't seem to have any concept of how or why they got that way even though they freely admit to eating a high fat, high calorie diet. I suggested that we, as a society, have failed in getting the word out to everyone about what constitutes a healthy diet and good nutrition.

Yes, there are varied reasons for gaining excess weight, which I've already said. And yes, most people who are overweight have at least a basic idea of how they got that way. That doesn't mean its easy to change old habits or lose weight - I never suggested that at all.

I don't think this is a lack of compassion issue. In fact, just the opposite. The fact that I'm trying to find new ways to help my patients get healthier is kind of the point. I know there are many people here at DIS who have struggled with their weight over the years and I thought it might be helpful to hear what kinds of strategies have worked for others. I thought I might get some insight into better counseling my patients. At no time did I say, or hopefully even imply, that I was criticizing anyone for being obese or making fun of people who have weight problems.

I'm glad this thread has grown so long but I think some of the message has gotten lost in the process.

 

[bananiem]

I think a few people are joining the thread late and missed the point of the original topic. My original point was discussing how best for a physician to interact with people who are obese but don't seem to have any concept of how or why they got that way even though they freely admit to eating a high fat, high calorie diet. I suggested that we, as a society, have failed in getting the word out to everyone about what constitutes a healthy diet and good nutrition.

I'm sorry, I understood your original post but I got side-tracked too.
I don't know how to get people to understand. My MIL knows all the men on her dh's side of the family have died of heart disease, as did her parents. When my Dad had heart surgery she told me over and over how he's have to watch his salt intake. Yet she still insists on salting EVERYTHING she cooks.