Hoarders on A&E, do you watch?

[HelenePA]

The people who hoard food just amaze me. They had a woman who would still eat out dated food. She had stacks of yogurt in her fridge and it was over 6 months old but she still ate it. Even when they tried to throw away a rotten pumpkin she stopped them and said she wanted the seeds. I'm assumng her issue come from not having enough food at one point in her life.

My grandmother was like this with food for awhile but she wouldn't eat it she would just buy and buy and buy and not throw out anything I took charge one day and threw everything out. She was less than thrilled with me for a few days but was thankful I did it. She knew it had to be done but was so afraid of not having money or being able to buy anything she would just keep it.

 

[The Mystery Machine]

As far as the show, I did see it on and I could only watch a few minutes of it. It was very painful to see people in that situation.

 

[Tantor]

My mom is a hoarder. We have since moved her into a retirement home because of her health but the house was a complete mess.
We have cleaned it up since she has moved out and when she came back to see it we told her it was all "put away" in the storage room downstairs (which she saw and was completely happy about)

Yes there is always something beyond just collecting "Junk", my mom lost her mom, brother and her husband with-in 5 years. I think this is what set it off.
I watch the show and I end up cleaning up something after the show because I never want to be like that...........it scares me.

 

[Nom]

I watched the show for the first time this week and was fascinated. It was the patty show- I could not believe after all that her husband divorced her and she still did not get the kids back. And it said the husband got custody of the son- what happened to the poor little mermaid loving daughter? I thought for sure that she was going to get the kids back; her house did look great after the clean up, although she put mostly everything in storage (probably why the state did not believe she made a real recovery).

And the poor partner of that man- she had a heart attack a few weeks later... the whole show was just so sad.

To those who have been watching the show a while- are there ever happy endings? I am wondering if this disorder is as bad as something like an eating disorder- it seems like most people with severe eating disorders never fully recover to lead 'normal' lives, even if they make a brief short- term recovery.

 

[mommytobug]

OP here. Sorry I cant post from my blackberry. I did read the thread last night. The young guy really touched me also. He would not throw away anything, he gave an example of water bottles. He said if his mom bought him bottled water that his mind told him it was offensive to her to throw it away. Of course he lived with his alcoholic father who chose to sit in the grass drunk and scream about people not needing to help his son. There were liquor bottles everywhere, on the floor, stuck in drawers and everywhere.

The episode about Patty gave an update at the end that she and her husband divorced 6 months after the show and that he had their son and was working on getting their daughter back.

I do cultural diversity training here at work. Looks like some people need it here. I am amazed and shocked how how uncaring and rude people can be. I see it often as an advocate for the mentally ill.

 

[minkydog]

For those of you whose parents hoard - have they always done it or is this something that started when they got older?

My mother has always been a "saver." As long as I can remember she has saved baby clothes, toys, old cribs & old playpens, crafts her kids made, stuffed animals that someone gave her. Its as if there is some "spirit" imbued in the item--to throw it out would almost be sacrilege, like killing another person.

My step-dad wasn't really a hoarder, he was a collector. His collections were very specific--old guns and model airplanes. There are hundreds of airplanes in the house, floor to ceiling the length of one bedroom. He died 7 years ago, but all of his stuff is still there. Since he died my mother has not been able to part with ANYTHING. If the item was EVER touched by Dave, then it becomes a "relic" worthy of worship. I"m NOT kidding.

In the past 10 years her hoarding really got going and then after Dave died it was like pouring gasoline on a flame. She is saving every paper, plastic bag, empty juice bottle and milk jug, pieces of foil, paper towels. Now her house is so out of control I don't think she will be able to get it in order. The stress of living in such chaos is really taking it's toll.

When you keep all this stuff, you have to tend it. It has to be catalogued in your brain so that you can remember that you have it, even though you might not know exactly where it is. I can't tell you how many times my mother has had to go out and buy something because she simply can't find it. Its a disease. I dread the day when my mother has to go live in a senior apartment or assisted living. She knows that day is coming, she talks about it. But she can't part with any of her treasures.

 

[Tracy041500]

OMG. I watched it this paast weekend. Nasty Disgusting I wanted to vomit and can not understand how anyone could live like that.

 

[Tracy041500]

I watch it on On Demand on Saturday morning. Nothing makes me get off my behind and get the house cleaned quicker than watching about 20 minutes of Hoarders.

ITA

 

[minkydog]

Hoarding is just people that are too busy, lazy, tired etc to get rid of their junk. If you care, then go in and purge the junk and force them to move on. Really that simple

O.M.G. Oh, no you ditn't...What a maroon

Hoarding for her had to do with sentimentality over all else. She held on to things that held special meaning for whatever reason. Even 30 year old chicken.

My MIL has saved her husband's last cigarette butt for hte past 24 years. Yes, that would be the same last cigarette that brought on the massive heart attack that KILLED HIM IN THE LIVING ROOM!

Sorry but just go there and throw the stuff out. I mean the person is not going to have a seizure or die (god forbid!) if someone does it.

I guess my point is that you just get rid of it. If there is no family or someone looking out for them, then sure I understand how it gets and stays that bad. But if you do have guardian family/friends then get in there and clear it out.

Um, okay. You're saying just go into my mom's house and start tossing stuff THAT BELONGS TO HER? Her mind is intact, so she gets to decide who comes in and what goes out, not me. There is no way I would just disregard her feelings and start trashing her stuff.

She has so much anxiety about getting rid of her stuff that it very well COULD cause her to have a heart attack--she's 76; she has heart disease, diabetes, and asthma. In her situation going slowly is the reasonable course. Every time I'm at her house I try to get her to part with a few things. But I would never deign to take over while she's in her right mind and has breath in her body.

Have you considered contacting the show about your mom? Not to make a spectacle of her but to actually get their help?

No, my mother would be mortified. She would rather go on Jerry Springer and claim to be channeling dead strippers!

your sheer ignorance of the subject is astounding. i don't care if you "believe" in depression, cancer, or post traumatic stress disorder, but they are all real. hoarding is no different.

Bravo!

I understand keeping sentimental things like baby clothes. What I don't understand is why people keep trash. Plastic bags, candy wrappers, soda bottles, etc. That stuff is garbage - throw it out! It just seems lazy to me.

So, you think it's okay to go into someone else's house, someone who is still of sound mind, and start throwing out there stuff? Do you understand "theft by taking"?

Don't you think if they could stop, they would? Do you think they are happy being in such a foul mess?

The level of ignorance on this thread is truly astounding.

 

[locolala]

I've not seen the show, but my ex's parents were horrible hoarders. It was horrible being in that house. It smelled horrible. They didn't use a trash service, they kept cans and bottles, and burned the rest in the back yard. They couldn't sleep in the bedroom they had, so his mom slept on a chair and dad slept on a couch. In cleaning out an upstairs room, we found a dead cat. They didn't even recognize the cat! It was truely, truely disturbing. I spoke to my father to get his insight, and he has always believed that it is a true disease. My dad holds two Masters degrees in psychology, so I tend to believe what he says.

 

[Sparx]

i never knew there were so many professional councelors in the forum. i guess i can just throw all the money being spent on my degree in psychology down the toilet next semester. your therapy methods are obviously miles above what i'm learning.

just throw it away.

yeah, that'll fix it.

but really now. if you don't know anything about this disease you have no business calling those who suffer from it lazy or stupid.

when a PET scan can be administered, and hoarding can show up on the monitor screen, how can you call that laziness? its real. weather you believe me or not. i don't much care if you believe in electricity, or running water, or the common cold, but they are all real, i can show them to you, and i can prove their existance. what more do you need?

 

[locolala]

From a well respected psychiatric journal:

Hoarding is defined as the acquisition of and inability to discard items, even though they appear (to others) to have no value (5). Hoarding behavior has been observed in several neuropsychiatric disorders, including schizophrenia, dementia, eating disorders, autism, and mental retardation, as well as in nonclinical populations, but it is most commonly found in OCD (6). 30% to 40% of OCD patients report hoarding and saving symptoms (6–8), and about 10% to 15% have hoarding as their most prominent symptom factor (3, 6). Compulsive hoarding is most commonly driven by obsessional fears of losing important items that the patient believes will be needed later, distorted beliefs about the importance of possessions, excessive acquisition, and exaggerated emotional attachments to possessions (5). Compulsive hoarding and saving leads to clutter that can cover living and work spaces, rendering them unusable. Hoarding frequently causes significant impairment in social and occupational functioning. In severe cases, it can produce health risks from infestations, falls, fires, and inability to cook or eat in the home (6).

Source: Is Compulsive Hoarding a Genetically and Neurobiologically Discrete Syndrome? Implications for Diagnostic Classification
Sanjaya Saxena, M.D. As published March 2007 in The American Journal Of Psychiatry.

I have a feeling that Ed/Colleen is one of those people who don't believe in psychiatric conditions such as PTSD or (as noted) OCD. I highly doubt they have a degree in psych, so their statements should be taken with a grain of salt.

I have just a mere bachelors in psych, so I don't claim to be an expert on these matters. Just as I don't claim to be an expert on microbiology, which is what the degree I'm working on now is in.

 

[dicar123]

My mil has something of a problem with hoarding. At this point, I think she has some control over it because she often has guests staying over and would be embarrassed. But every single drawer, cabinet and closet is PACKED full of stuff and she has an amazing amount of furniture.

One particular problem we have that no one else has mentioned is she hoards cash. I could walk into her house and within 2 minutes I could put my hands on $1500 easy.

So, it isn't a matter of just start dumping stuff when she passes. We're going to have to examine every nook and cranny lest we throw out thousands of dollars.

 

[The Orchid]

Wait so if you are a hoarder it is due to when you grew up? (btw my dad was born in 1921 and was not a hoarder, ).

Yet folks say it is a mental disorder (per Wiki no less).... So what is it?

The era excuse does not float water.. I grew up in the 70's and have no desire for disco music or burning my bra...

Most (if not all) mental disorders are a result of BOTH environmental and genetic factors. Let's say 20% of the population has a genetic risk of developing this disease. Most of those 20% won't display the disease. The ones most likely to develop the disease are the ones who have had environmental influences in addition to the genetic predisposition. For example, those raised in very poor homes or people who were abused or have gone through other mental strains may develop the illness. Your dad was born in 1921, but perhaps his genes are void of whatever causes this disease to happen. That's good! It's a wonderful thing that your dad is fine. But please don't judge other people based on your dad. Everybody is different and some aren't so lucky.

 

[Disney Ella]

I am sorry for those of you who are dealing with this with your parents. It must be very difficult and frustrating.

If you've ever seen "Clean House," there is always a segment at the beginning of the show where the host asks the homeowners how the house got to be in such a state. A lot of times they say that they guess they just didn't keep up with things enough or were lazy. However, as the show goes on and the host and cast members want to get rid of things, all of a sudden these people don't want to get rid of anything. A lot of times it is obvious that there is a psychological problem, at least to me. I think that it may be more socially acceptable to some hoarders to let people think they're lazy, rather than be thought of as having a psychological problem.

 

[TeresaBelle]

For those that asked, Hoarders comes on Monday's at 10 on A&E.

I really like this show. I do wish they'd devote the whole hour to only one person's story though

 

[Handbag Lady]

For those of you whose parents hoard - have they always done it or is this something that started when they got older?

My parents have a neighbor up the road who is a hoarder. She inherited the farm when her parents died and has filled up the house, barn and several other buildings with junk she gets out of dumpsters. She lives in a motel room now because she can't live in the house anymore, but my parents still seeing her unloading more junk on the property. In this woman's case, she has had some form of mild mental illness since she was a teenager (at least, that's what another neighbor told my mother years ago), was able to keep a job, but always lived with her parents. Her mother was able to keep her in line, but once the mother died, this woman started filling the house with junk and her father was too frail to handle the situation.

Our house was always clean growing up. Not totally spotless, but you'd never think twice to invite people over without cleaning first.

But, my mom had a junk drawer in the kitchen that could never be cleaned out. Her closet could never be touched by anyone else, and various hidey-holes and bins inside my mom and dad's closests could not be cleaned.

I suspect my mom ALWAYS had it, but hid it well for years. I also suspect it is one of the reasons my dad left her for another woman, but when he went, the house was still somewhat presentable. When he left, that's when it really started. My mom and her mom were the same. Same build-up over the years and the same piles and piles of stuff and stuff and stuff.

My mom had a bad childhood, which she never goes into detail with us. She says, though, that with five brothers and sisters, she never had her own things.

 

[Shelly F - Ohio]

Looking at people hoard makes my lifes problems seem like a cake walk.

I watched a segment on MSNBC a few months back and the woman they interviewed had so much stuff in her apartment you could not move. She had a small uncluttered space on the floor which is where she slept!
She got evicted and her stuff was thrown into a dumpster.

 

[minkydog]

Looking at people hoard makes my lifes problems seem like a cake walk.

I watched a segment on MSNBC a few months back and the woman they interviewed had so much stuff in her apartment you could not move. She had a small uncluttered space on the floor which is where she slept!
She got evicted and her stuff was thrown into a dumpster.

This is so sad and so true. My sister's in-laws were hoarders and their house was very much as you describe. It was nasty and vermin infested, with huge piles of stuff everywhere. Well, the MIL developed Alzheimers. The kids couldn't get the dad to do anything, so he kept her at home stuck in a little room with a bed in it. She could no longer navigate her own house, so she just lay there. One night she fell out of bed and broke her hip. The FIL tried to get her up but she was in too much pain. He was forced to call 911. When the fire department came they were appalled. They loaded her up and called Adult Protective Services on the way to the ER. MIL never returned to her home. FIL refused to have the house cleaned up and a judge decided that HE couldn't go back home either.

It took my sister and BIL 8 WEEKS to clean out the house and get it ready to sell. The MIL had hidden valuable with bags of garbage, so they had to go through absolutely everything. The garbage company took away 3 industrial size dumpsters full of stuff. Such a shame.

 

[MushyMushy]

My parents' house is a mixture of treasure and trash too. Fortunately it won't be food and garbage (well, maybe some trash in the form of papers, magazines, etc). It'll take forever go sort through it all.