High school graduation "shower"

[Pigeon]

Unreal.

I'm happy to give my 19 nieces and nephews graduation presents for their high school and college graduations, but I've never heard of a shower. Good grief, what a gift grab.

 

[kathie859]

This invitation is NUTS!! ---an obvious ploy to outfit their child for college by the parents! I think I'd have to have something else to do that day and send my "regrets" and best wishes---because with that attitude of entitlement they are going to need it.

 

[sharonmickey]

As a parent of a 2008 high school graduate I have never heard of this. Most of my DD's friends had an open house in a local facility such as a park or restaurant.

 

[The Disney Bunch]

I think it is tacky - so.... are you going to go??

 

[crusoe2]

And I thought sending graduation invitations to everyone you've ever known in your life was bad. Seriously, my son will be a junior this year so the whole graduation thing is looming for us. I've already decided that we are NOT following the local custom of sending invites to absolutely EVERYBODY we know. I've lost count of how many times my husband and I have had to try to figure out "who is this kid?" To me, that is an obvious gift grab. As a matter of fact, the subject came up not long ago when I received invitations to 3 different bridal showers for the same bride. Maybe it was really rude of me but I didn't attend any of them nor did I send a gift - to any of them. Someone told me I would regret that when we started sending out grad invitations and I informed them that I don't plan to send one to that family anyway. The mom has always found excuses to get out of helping w/bridal and baby showers - they just never had the money, were going through a tough time financially, etc, etc. Yep, I bet that country club membership and the driveway full of FOUR (count 'em, four) very expensive automobiles probably did put a strain on their finances. These folks also sent out a chatty email to let everyone know that the daughter had gotten engaged and asked for "everyone's prayers as we go through this exciting but challenging time in our lives." Huh? Were we supposed to respond with offers to help with the wedding? Geez, while they were playing golf at the club and driving around in style, I was chugging along in a very used car and scraping up change so that I could do my fair share to help with the family bridal showers and such.
Okay, I'll get off my soapbox now. I just can't believe some people, though. Let's just say that this mom DOES plan to save money on the engraved invites and use it to outfit Jr's dorm room.

 

[starann]

If XXX did not have a graduation party this is a really good idea, it beats going to a graudation party and giving a cash gift and the cash being blown on a new Wii or a tank of gas to drive to the beach or the mall. This was you at least know what your graduation gift is going for (like at a baby shower or wedding shower) and not being wasted.

Now if XXX did have a graduation party....this is TACKY and a ploy for yet another gift. I'm not sure how much the invites cost them ( just being devils advocate here....I know you can make some nice ones now on the computer that look fancy, or maybe they have a family member who does them cheap).


Good luck!

 

[Handbag Lady]

Time to break out the Tacky Box!

Tack, tacky, TACKY!

No, you don't need a shower for a graduation! I don't care if you didn't have a graduation party in June.

And asking for gifts? Please.

I'd mail her a showercap and forget it.

 

[englishteacha]

Whoa. Hope this trend doesn't make it here! Graduation parties around here usually are a BBQ or family event, and it's generally the custom to give a gift that will help the graduate in the next phase of his/her life. I can't imagine having a "shower" for a graduate. That seems insane to me. One of my former students graduated this year, and his mom sent me a pretty piece of paper and asked me to write some good wishes on it for him to take to college. That's cool. Inviting everyone you know to give your kid presents? NOT cool.

 

[Tinkermommy]

I have just got a new job. You are all invited to my "New Job Shower."

Since I need a new wardrobe, please come and shower me with gifts and good wishes!

I am registered at Ann Taylor, Banana Republic and Bloomingdales

Regrets only!

 

[sndfan]

Yikes. Yikes. Yikes.

I didn't have a graduation party for either high school or college and I never knew the difference! I did what was expected of me...study, get good grades, and graduate in 4 years OR LESS. I'm thankful that I had parents that paid for my education.

If you STRETCH your imagination and XXXXX didn't have a grad party, I guess it's not that awful, but something about the lingo on the invite is what rubs me the wrong way!

 

[RLccweems]

My niece (on the dh side of the family ) graduated from H.S. this year.
Today we got a invitation for a "shower". I mean a professional grade wedding type invitation w/ a rsvp card. It said
"Please join us as we shower XXXX with gifts and well wishes as she begins the second phase of her life..... COLLEGE" On saturday August 17

XXX is registered at Target & Bed, bath & Beyond.

Is this a new trend? Boy, I am so out of the loop. Whatever happen to a barbeque in the backyard?

Interesting.....I've never heard of this before. Maybe it's a regional thing?

 

[marcyinPA]

It seems to be a newish trend. I'm probably going to get flamed at some point, but I don't think that registering for gifts for every milestone is appropriate. Weddings, yes.....babies, yes. Graduating from High School...not so much! But I also don't agree with celebrating preschool or kindergarten "graduations". I wonder how much longer it will be before kiddos are registering for those!! LOL. ( I plan on taking my son to Great Adventure for the day if they try and have a graduation ceremony!)

As an aside, when I graduated, I got a few checks from relatives, and someone bought me a new backpack (my uncle, who had just graduated from college, who knew the value of a high quality backpack!). Guess what got the most use and I kept the longest??? Yep, that backpack!!! And we had a BBQ in the backyard, but that was all the way back in 1991 !!!

No flames from me! I totally agree with you! (I also agree with you on the preschool/kindergarten graduation thing. IMO, it's just too much!! )

 

[missycj96]

I have mixed feelings. On one hand, if there was no graduation party, and people would probably get the graduate gifts anyway - its kind of a cute idea to get the person what they need to head off to college. On the other hand, if the guests are not people who would have been buying a graduation gift anyway its inappropriate.

 

[momx2]

One word....TACKY! I think the gift giving for every ocassion you can think of has gotten out of hand.

 

[mantysk8coach]

I have just got a new job. You are all invited to my "New Job Shower."

Since I need a new wardrobe, please come and shower me with gifts and good wishes!

I am registered at Ann Taylor, Banana Republic and Bloomingdales

Regrets only!

LOL!

And while we are issuing invitations, you are also all invited to my "7th wedding anniversary shower". The wedding gifts are all wearing out and needing to be replaced, so please come and shower us with gifts to help us enter the next seven years of our married lives!

Seriously though...I've never heard of this before in this part of the country. Kind of creative actually, but yeah...tacky!

 

[mplsmom1]

No flames from me! I totally agree with you! (I also agree with you on the preschool/kindergarten graduation thing. IMO, it's just too much!! )

I have a HS Senior this year - I also agree, this is TACKY. A BBQ is one thing and then limited to family and close friends. I did have to laugh on the kindergarten grad thing though. My very dear sister just sent last spring a photo of her kindergartener resplendent in full cap and gown....I nearly died laughing. I didn't send anything either to "mark the occasion". It's her oldest, I plan on teasing her in about 5 years!

 

[DVC Sadie]

Now that I stopped laughing my patootie off I can try to give a proper reply.

Since I retired early I think I will send out vellum invitiations with R.S.V.P. cards to "Shower" me with wonderful gifts for my retirement years. This will be the last phase of my life and I know that everyone will want to help me celebrate and to make sure that I go out in style.

Below is my modest wish list.

I will be registered (just to helpful) with Cunard,Regent and Celebrity cruise lines.

Sincerely, Sadie

 

[lovesmurfs]

But I also don't agree with celebrating preschool or kindergarten "graduations". I wonder how much longer it will be before kiddos are registering for those!! LOL. ( I plan on taking my son to Great Adventure for the day if they try and have a graduation ceremony!)

ITA. Reminds me of The Incredibles:

Helen: I can't believe you don't want to go to your own son's graduation.

Bob: It's not a graduation. He is moving from the 4th grade to the 5th grade.

Helen: It's a ceremony!

Bob: It's psychotic! They keep creating new ways to celebrate mediocrity...



OP, I hope you plan to decline the "opportunity".......

 

[jax677]

I just had a "going away to college" party for my youngest. We don't have parties for most birthdays after they turn 8 and no high school parties. We just invited close family. We told people by word of mouth. No begging for gifts, just getting together for a b-b-q and visiting.

I think 1/2 brought something, but the other 1/2 just came to talk, eat and enjoy each others company. Just what we wanted.

We also had a college graduation party for my oldest and again only close family were invited. I didn't send out all of those graduation cards the school gave us. My feeling is if we don't see a person on a regular basis, we don't bother them with celebrations. Especially if they are out of town. I just feel like too many people put their hand out for every little thing.

 

[Disneymommy2006]

This kind of "shower" has been a family tradition in my family- since I graduated in 88. My first cousin's son is this weekend. However- we don't send out invitations...close family members decide when we will all get together with the kid going off to college. (We are a pretty close knit family.) The graduate gets some of the stuff he or she will need for going off to college. Gifts are often inexpensive towels, sheets, laundry baskets....anything like that that he or she will need. We do it to help out our family members (in a very small way) with the outrageous cost of college...