Thank you, everyone, for your help, support, and very kind comments.
About my dress: I fell in love with two dresses, a Monique and a Kenneth Pool for Amsale.

Good job, jojo! I fell in love, but it wasn't unconditional love--lol--it was like dating two really great guys, liking them both, but not liking them enough to marry them--and wishing they were combined so you could take it to the next level. In other words, I couldn't commit. And since both ran 6-8 thousand dollars (the dress, not the men) before alterations (too bad men can't be taken to the tailor's for alterations) I needed to feel COMMITTED--since me and Visa were going to be married to this dress for awhile.
Ultimately, I am just too frugal. There was no way I was going to spend that kind of money for a dress. I just refuse to pay that kind of money for a label--but I want the couture finishing (interior finished seams, silk lining, silk satin, silk chiffon venise lace, hand beading, hand appliqued lace, etc.) See, the problem is that once you put one of those designer gowns on, you are hooked. There is no going back. So what is a bride to do? I shopped designer sample sales, and while they were all beautiful, they are also all pretty much the same. I did a great deal of research to find a dress designer that would work with me so I could get what I wanted--at half the cost. I had specific ideas of the "look" I wanted, and she worked with me to achieve that.
Granted, my dress is still pricey, but I worked hard just to be able to even
wear this dress. (I've gone from a size 22W to a size 10/12.) And couture fabrics and finishes don't come cheap, so I made like my own fairy Godmother, plunked dow my trusty Visa and now....move over Cinderella, you ain't got nothing on me!!
I will post pictures after my December wedding. 9 weeks to go--I can't believe it!