HELP! Ideas for Bachelor type party (clean)...raffles etc???

[TipsyTraveler]

Ok, guess I'm not real clear.

There is one bachelor party. The one the dad is giving. The laser tag is just son and his friend going out. That's it. No "party".

There is one shower for the bride.

No guest overlap because one is for girls, one is for boys.

Sorry again if I was not clear. Just looking for clean entertainment/game ideas.

Okay, I guess I was confused because you said your son wanted laser tag with the best man as his bachelor party, and he's doing that. In addition, there's the party future FIL wants. Which, btw, I can't believe he'd come up with the idea for this and then expect you to do the work.

Sorry, I can't help you with entertainment ideas. The bachelor/ette party ideas I'm familiar with wouldn't be welcome in a church.

 

[aejammers]

IMO it's kind of strange to have the Women plan a Bachelor Party. If the FIL doesn't have the time, then he should be asking brothers, uncles, other guy friends (either his contemporaries or the groom's) to plan this. Not the Mothers.

 

[Wishing on a star]

I was also wondering if they know that your son really does not want this.

The whole thing is just something that I can't wrap my head around.... Strange!
The brides parents holding a bachelor party for the groom, in a church, to raise money.

I think I would have to find a way out of that one.

 

[mjkacmom]

Most folks here just rent out a go-go bar for the night, and charge admittance. DH's friends took him to NYC to stay the night before his go-go party, so he got 48 hours of "fun." His dad was only at the go-go part.

 

[CaitlinMarie13]

I would talk to your son. If he really doesn't want the party then its up to him and his fiancé to stop it, plus that won't create any bad blood between you and his future in-laws! If he doesn't care, then it really doesn't take much room to set up corn hole (as long as there is nothing breakable around haha). I have never heard of this type of thing, but who knows, it could be a lot of fun!

 

[BOST99]

What about setting up an xbox? You can have some sort of tournament. Ping pong? Or plan it around some sporting event that you can broadcast on TV?

I read this less about the money and more about preventing future Sons -ILs from getting into trouble at their Bachelor's party Good Luck!

 

[pat fan]

I would talk to your son.

I believe it is supposed to be a surprise.

I read this less about the money and more about preventing future Sons -ILs from getting into trouble at their Bachelor's party Good Luck!

I don't think so. Like I have said, I guess a lot of people do this on that side of the mountain. My side too apparently since my sister's husband has been invited to these kind of events. Just no one in my circle has ever done this. Closest I can recall is Jack & Jill style events you had to buy tickets to. Or Anniversary parties. I guess I can see it if they are trying to have an event for guys that is like a shower, but not a shower or girly. I have no idea. Again, just looking for game ideas.

 

[ariel71]

I think it's inconsiderate of you to set up your son for something he has explicitly told you he wasn't interested in. Her family wants to do it, so be it, but I would see it as a betrayal if my mother was directly involved in the planning. It's not until this fall and her father "doesn't have time" to plan it? Yeah, OK. If it's so common in their family and SUCH a big deal to them, they should know exactly what "etc." means. Bow out. It IS your call whether you involve yourself. Just say "my son told me he'd just prefer a day with his friend and I want to respect his wishes."

 

[gwynne]

I think it's inconsiderate of you to set up your son for something he has explicitly told you he wasn't interested in. Her family wants to do it, so be it, but I would see it as a betrayal if my mother was directly involved in the planning. It's not until this fall and her father "doesn't have time" to plan it? Yeah, OK. If it's so common in their family and SUCH a big deal to them, they should know exactly what "etc." means. Bow out. It IS your call whether you involve yourself. Just say "my son told me he'd just prefer a day with his friend and I want to respect his wishes."

1000x yes to this. OP, please read the above post. Listening to and respecting your son's wishes should be the most important thing in this situation.
The other family? If they want to do something they will.

 

[Wishing on a star]

I have to agree...

If his fiance, or her family, or any other friend, wants to try to do something...
Fine, have at it.... None of my busiiness.

Somebody asking me to be involved in pulling something on my son... Something as personal as his bachelor party... Something that I have never, ever, in a million years heard of the brides mother/father, or the grooms mother, having any real say-so in.

Sorry, it just wouldn't fly with me.
I would not consider my son's bachelor party to be any more of my business than I would his wedding night.

I just couldn't do it.

And, to make it out to be a fund-raiser... at a church.
No way, now how, ever.

 

[Minnesota!]

I would back out - tell them your son explicitly does not want it, and honestly...tacky.

I have never heard of anything of the sort, but it just kind of gives off a gross vibe..

If you decide to go through with it - I would do the bean bag toss, xbox, Wii Bowling, darts, etc.

 

[mondragon]

VEGAS!!!!!! Send him there. I had a great time at my bachelor party there (7 of us). Since when does the father in law throw the bachelor party. Isn't that up to the best man. Sounds like he is a little bit of a control freak and doesn't want him hurting his daughter so he demands it to be a G-rated party with punch and cake. You don't need to have strippers to have fun at a bachelor party. Went to one last year where we rented a party bus and bar hopped in south beach. Had tons on fun.

 

[mondragon]

So, my DS is getting married this fall (WOOT!) and our family has never done the bachelor party thing for ANY of the guys. Apparently it's a big deal on her side of the family. They usually do the thing where you sell tickets to the event and have raffles and the guys have to buy tickets for etc....The "etc" has me stumped. While it is her dad that really wants to do this, he doesn't have the time to plan it so it's falling to the fiance's mom & I to plan it. Can't do card games because it's in the church and you can't gamble (but raffle tickets is ok???) so I have no idea. The whole thing makes me squeamish because it's clearly stated to raise money for them and I think it's beyond tacky, but I guess people do this all the time. For the record, DS said in the beginning he didn't want this and he and the best man are just going laser-tagging, but I guess her family expects it, so he'll be very surprised when it happens!

Anyway, her dad suggested a movie, but we decided that would be too long for the guys to sit through, so what other activities could we come up with? There is going to be a meal and a couple raffle baskets.

Whoa. Didn't read it was in a church. Baaaad idea. How old is your son. If old enough to drink I am sure he would like a few on his bachelor party which will never happen a church.

 

[BillBrasky]

Bachelor party in a church with parents is so disboards, you guys... so disboards.

 

[mondragon]

Bachelor party in a church with parents is so disboards, you guys... so disboards.

They can play hide-n-seek, drink some Jesus juice, do karaoke (great acoustics). I would be so pissed if I had a bachelor party in a church. Wouldn't be surprised if no one shows up.

 

[Pumbaa_]

Let fil plan it all out n paper then get some of his friends famiky to execute. If you are not comfortable and it is not your tradition you can decline. No is a complete sentence

 

[Pumbaa_]

Did you tell them that your son does not want this?

Even better, did your son, the one about to marry say no? Time for him to set the tone for the future

 

[The Mystery Machine]

If it is such a big deal to THAT side of the family, they can plan it.

Having a BP at a church is just 10 kinds of wrong anyway in my book.

 

[pat fan]

You know, I was looking for game ideas, not to have our life choices bashed. Sorry if you think people can't have a good time without bars or strippers and that church would be the worst place to spend an evening with people you care about. No, it's not my cup of tea, but I respect that it is THEIR cup of tea. I think I have said that I am going to tell them again he doesn't want to do this (doesn't like crowds, nothing to do with drinking or church). BTW, he doesn't drink anyway, not that it's anyone's business but we have alcoholism in the family and he had a run-in with it through HS and after and is on his feet now. So peace out folks. Thanks to those who chose to offer ideas, and to those who thought it was better to bash a clean party where every age could get together....whatever. And especially thanks to those who chose to bash the Church in particular. Stay classy my friend.

 

[mondragon]

You know, I was looking for game ideas, not to have our life choices bashed. Sorry if you think people can't have a good time without bars or strippers and that church would be the worst place to spend an evening with people you care about. No, it's not my cup of tea, but I respect that it is THEIR cup of tea. I think I have said that I am going to tell them again he doesn't want to do this (doesn't like crowds, nothing to do with drinking or church). BTW, he doesn't drink anyway, not that it's anyone's business but we have alcoholism in the family and he had a run-in with it through HS and after and is on his feet now. So peace out folks. Thanks to those who chose to offer ideas, and to those who thought it was better to bash a clean party where every age could get together....whatever. And especially thanks to those who chose to bash the Church in particular. Stay classy my friend.

We are not bashing you. We just think the FIL is doing what's best for his family and not getting any input from your son and your family. If your son is going to last in this marriage he better speak up or her family will always walk all over him and your family. Where is the best man in all of this. He should be deciding on what to do. Since you are not too far from the beach I assume, why don't the guys do a fishing trip. They can charter a boat all night. Bachelor party's are not meant to take place at a church where you will play silly picnic games.