Help, Autistic Spectrum small person at WDW

[sunset30]

Hi,
Totally new to this as we have only just been made aware that the issues our son has are NOT those that face every 3yr old.

We are at the beginning of our journey understanding how best to help him, as he is high functioning (fluent language, excels at numbers and letters) but has some significant issues.

ie - needs to be WELL prepared for new things / hates surprises

NEEDS to follow a routine (he CAN be prepared for deviations well in advance)

is very obsessive (so far he knows he is going on a plane and he is going to meet Mickey Mouse, if we try to introduce the idea of doing something else, he needs to check he will ALSO meet Mickey Mouse FIRST)

very BAD at queuing (struggles to understand turn taking etc)

he also has some food issues that we should be able to handle there just the same as here?

He will go into meltdown if things don't happen AT THE EXACT MINUTE he is expecting them (he can tell time, and really, a one minute deviation can lead to full on lying on the ground wailing!)

And other things.

I was just wondering if there are any people out there who have made a successful vacation at WDW whilst dealing with such things, and whether they have hints and tips?

many thanks
Lx

 

[bookwormde]

First lean about the why for the whats you described above, Get a copy of Tony Attwood's "The complete guide to Aspergers" which is available on amazon for about $17, this will help you "get it" so you can understand the best ways to accomidate to your childs differences.

There are lots of us on this board who have done WDW for years with spectrum kids, and it is one of the most magical places in the world for them.

A few quick basics, as I said above understanding you child is #1, after that minizing crowd level by time of year, and time of day, using fast pass or GAC to lessen the challenges of the lines, listen to your child and do not push, and when tired take a break and if you are on site (Deluxes are great if they are within your budget)go back to resort to relax, swim nap or just explore. With diet issues we do a DVC villa with a full kitchen.

bookwormde

 

[sunset30]

Thank you! Thanks for the book reccomendation, I'll DEFINITELY look for that.

We are prepared to take lots of breaks (as he is only going to be nearly 4, and we were used to his foibles even before we knew he actually had a definite problem and not just toddler behaviour (he's an only child, so we had no comparison) and EVERYONE can get overwhelmed at WDW I imagine.

We are staying at WL, we read it was excellent for kids, and with the boat options to MK and to the monorail (he loves boats and trains) we thought it should be a good option.

Will a GAC help us?

We have booked a bunch of ADRs, before we realised the extent of his issues. He can certainly be prepared for meeting characters (Meeting Mickey Mouse is the thing that he is focussed on, going to Mickey Mouse's Home etc etc) but I am a little more worried about the "antics" type restaurants we have booked, WCC, and 50's for example. Realising that some of his issues are NOT to be grown out of, or taught away the way you might with a regular kid for a particular behaviour means we are taking much more notice of what he reacts to specifically and what he can't deal with. We already know he won't eat food that is mixed together and can't be separated (like pizza or spahetti with sauce etc) Also the noisier places may distress him. He will also almost certainly have a BIG problem at WCC if they do things like spill whole loads of straws etc (he gets upset if he thinks something has been "broken" or unintentionally and distressingly dropped causing a mess, he is not able to imagine something might be "a joke")

Sorry, I am talkng too much, like I say, we are right at the start of this journey, and a little overwhelmed, a very short while ago I knew NOTHNG about Autistic Spectrum Disorders. This trip has been booked for about 18 months (it's our wedding trip) so, we want to STILL make sure we get everything right for ds to ahve a blast.

Lx

 

[KPeveler]

Something that may help is a GAC for "stroller as wheelchair", which will allow him to stay in a stroller even in queues and wait areas - This will provide him with "his space" that no one can take away.

You may want to start watching videos with him - get the free travel planning video as well as watching videos on youtube of rides. It may help get him ready for the shows as well as give him an idea of what he can handle and what he cannot.

My suggestion for seeing Mickey is the Animation Studios - you can go in the gift shop and there is an indoor queue to see Mickey in his sorcerer costume (mickey is out in LOTS of outfits, so that may be difficult if he is expecting a certain one). The queue is shorter than most others for mickey, and indoors. Also, you can ask a CM BEFORE you get there if mickey is out.

Try a travel itinerary, like Ridemax or TourGuideMike. Make use of LOTS of fastpasses

Book ADRs so he knows what he is going to get to eat and when.

Plan breaks in the middle of the day, because that is the hottest and he will need a nap.

Talk to CMs at Guest Services about any other accommodations a GAC may help you with.

 

[toodycat]

Sunset30---Here are some ideas we've used in the past. I've never gotten a GAC because my ASD DS is OK with lines, but if your son can't queue up comfortably, I would definitely get the GAC.

1. We watched videos of WDW before the trip, so he would be familiar with the attractions. You can view them on youtube.

2. We dressed our son in extremely vibrant T-shirts, so that if we were separated, we could spot him. Also, bring a raincoat from home. If it rains and you buy Disney ponchos, your kid is one of thousands of people in the same poncho. His own raincoat will make him easy to spot if you become separated.

3. We put a bracelet on my son with his name, our names, our cell numbers and our resort. If he got lost, he could just show a CM the bracelet. Later on he graduated to a walkie-talkie and later still, a cell phone.

4. Print out maps of the theme parks, so he has an idea of where he is going and where things are. Even if he is too young to decipher it, carrying the map may give him a sense of security.

5. Make ADRs and show him kids' menus online. We ordered plain pasta for DS for years!

6. My DS didn't like WCC when he passed in the WL lobby. Even though we've stayed at WL, we never ate there because it was too noisy. Also, the WL boat transfers can be a bit loud. You might want to bring earplugs or headphones for that or take the buses.

7. Definitely plan to take a break at the midday point. Your son may need to take a break from all the sensory input.

Enjoy your trip. We've been going to WDW with our ASD son nearly every year since he was 6. We always see him make great strides afterwards.

 

[kaytieeldr]

Sorry, I am talkng too much

No, you're not. Talk all you want. This is a GREAT place to look for help/advice for your Disney trip with your son. The more you talk, the better others will be able to help you!!!!

 

[bookwormde]

WL is great next to AKL it is my DS's favorite, I second the being careful of WCC and would suggest backing down to just a few special ADRs unless your child manages restraunts easily.

Plan, take your time and use the clues your child give you and you will have a great time.

bookwromde

 

[sunset30]

Thank you all so much, I have added the suggestions to our holiday plan book, and will look up some videos on you tube (he loves watching things on the computer)

I think probably we will have to back down on the ADRs and just do a few, he is NOT good at restaurants generally, he doesn't like to wait, and also can't really sit still very well (or generally BE still ) So unless it is a VERY child friendly, but NOT too stimulating place (does such a thing even exist?) we could have a lot of problems.

I have made a plan for our holiday, which includes time for breaks but also whole days of down time, just at the resort, and a couple of opportunities to see each park, so if we have to bail at ANY point, we can always go back especially for something we'd really like to see.

Our Motto is going to be, "We are on holiday! it's FUN. If it's NOT fun anymore, we need a break!" we are not going to push our luck. BUT no one has said, "just don't go" which is great!

Also, at our wedding he will get to see some of his "best friends" who he knows at home, so, he might find that soothing, something familiar etc.

Lx

 

[Blanche_Neige]

My twins are both ASD (one of them Autistic, the other PDD-NOS). I remember how scared I was before our first trip to WDW.

I was so worried about the plane, I even had alternative in case the plane was a disaster how we would get back home!!

I did some reaserch about the various ride, looked at menus on WDWinfo.com 7 lots of Youtube. They have everything restaurents too, you can see videos of Disney restaurent to give you ideas of how loud it is, etc.

The first time the twins went they were 5 and it was MAGICAL!!! truly, back then my DS talked but mostly only to us and very rarely spontaneously. Had trouble waiting as well.

We went the last week January, made sure to pick value season, no big event = less crowd and it wasn't HOT.

I got a double stroller for the week, that was amazing. They are so easy to handle, great for when they are tired. even if you have only one child I recommend getting a double stroller- more room. I did buy them gameboy's (DS), great for waiting.

We stayed at the All Star Music Family suite. DS was fine, the bus were ok.

We kept their regular schedule, bedtime & mealtime. I had brought many snack from home just in case he wouldn;t like the American version If we did do a restaurent we choose character meals with buffets, he always found at lease one thing to eat... He had trouble with noise but some how the characters intrigue him more, so we didn't have issues. When it was too much, he just plugged his ears...

I did get the GAC, we did not have to use it since most ride there was no wait time. I have to say that I felt relieved at WDW, they understood, they had a place for us for once we didn't feel like we were burden. I had my sons wear a lyniard on which was a puzzle piece (that I made) on it the information in case they got lost along with the "Autistic". Some CM saw them puzzle "symbol" and knew right away what it meant and actually took more time to interact with my kids. The best part was when we saw Minnie Mouse, DS was so excited (who knew ) he was jumping up and down, Minnie did too and all of sudden DS started talking to her and since then he started to talk spontanously commenting on everything She holds a very special place in our hearts now and we always go see her.

When we went to see the Princesses, the CM told them before and they changed the way they were interacting with them; they did not ask the kids questions, but made comments like "I see you like mickey" instead of "who is your favorite character"! I was amazed.

We followed them closely, made sure they were ok, not getting over tired or overstimulated. As soon as we saw a sign, we took a break or went back to the hotel. That year we didn;t do any fireworks, but that is ok because we went back over and over and over...

I know that not all ASD kids are the same, go with your guts. Don't try to get too much in. Take breaks, get the GAC! enjoy the magic!

What time of the year are you going? Is anyone else traveling with you?

 

[ireland_nicole]

ask all the questions you need to, and yes, you can do this.
I second having a stroller- preferably with a recline and great sun canopy- I love the baby joggers (if you aren't bringing your own, orlandostrollerrentals.com is fabulous and rents them). I always get a map before hand- you can get free customized ones from disney.com and I highlight our route. That way we can show the kids where we're going. When mine weren't reading yet I made a picture schedule with individual laminated pictures on jump rings with everything we were going to do- that way they always knew what was coming next. Depending on what he likes, I would get his fave videos or songs on an ipod or a game system- WOW, what a difference it makes! We encourage the kids to use them when they have to wait, etc. If you do any of the 3d movies (skip It's tough to be a bug- trust me on this, you'll thank me later) I would recommend the first go round in the stroller in w/c seating in back- less overstimulating to try because the effects like the air puffs, etc. aren't all coming at you too. I'm sure there's lots more, but hopefully that's a start.

 

[sunset30]

We're going 7-21 October.

You guys are so helpful, a million things I had never thought of! I also never thought it would be that the CMs might try and make things easier / better for him too! Everyone's stories of how people at WDW "get it" are so reassuring! (I just had some one, a 10yr old, come up to us yesterday and say, "is he always this wierd?" which really upset me, especially as I always, until fairly recently just thought all toddlers did what he does to some extent)

I am sure he would love to follow on the map, so that's a good idea.

we were originally thinking he would do wiothout a stroller (he does his familiar routes here really well, and can walk MILES) but I suspect that the extra stimulation nd stress of WDW might mean that for him, having a safe, familiar place to be might be the best option.

Lx

 

[MomRN]

You could have very well described my son...he has anxiety with OCD tendencies. I had to have a "talk" with him before meeting the characters, and the CMs had asked if we had a GAC. We did not, and choose not to get one, because he is fine with almost everything as long as he understands what will happen. However, my ds has no problems waiting in line as long as we can keep him content (we play a lot of alphabet games... "A is for _____") and we don't wait standby longer than 20-30 minutes (use a lot of fastpasses).

My ds is also a picky eater, but we were able to sustain him. Maybe not the healthiest, but he did not starve. My ds problem is he doesn't like to get messy, so only eats items with a spoon if they are fed to him. We are working on this one.

I don't know if you've talked to your ped about your concerns, but make sure you do so. I was concerned about Autism, or a related spectrum disorder because of my ds pre-school, and the more and more I thought about it, researched it, and talked about it I was positive my son wasn't autistic, but there was something quirky about him. Hence the OCD diagnosis. We are working through it, but I'm sure there are different aspects to treatment, but do know, 3 yr olds do have OCD

 

[sunset30]

Thanks for that. He definitely has some OCD like traits, but he also has lack of empathy, and inability to do imaginative play / pretend. he can't follow a story from pictures, or imagine what characters in his stories might do next / after the end of the story, etc.

Oh and to EVERYONE who mentioned the character meetings at meals and in the parks being stressful and noisy. I currently love my husband to be EVEN MORE. I just got an e mail from Disney, and he has added Mickey Mouse and Donald Duck to our wedding plan! so DS can meet Mickey Mouse (and Donald Duck) with just us and our guests, so with a crowd of only 17 people, all of whom he knows, and he'll have 30 minutes to do so! He should have FUN meeting Mickey after all!
Lx

 

[Piper]

he can't follow a story from pictures, or imagine what characters in his stories might do next / after the end of the story, etc.

Just to give youa perspective--I taught PK in public school and a lot of "normal" 4 and 5 year olds have difficulty with this one--especially predicting what will happen next. It takes a lot of reading stories, the teacher making predictions, student practice to "get" this concept.

The "Carl" books by Alexandra Day are great wordless books for telling a story from pictures--and the story doesn't have to sound the same every time it is "read." The first time, just talk about what you see in the pictures and use a lot of "hmmmm, I wonder what he is going to do next. Oh look, the baby is on his back. I wonder where they're going! etc." If a comment is way off base, don't say "No that is not what is happening!" Instead say "Wow! That's interesting! What makes you think that?" Sometimes the explanations will make a lot of sense and will really help you see the child's perspective. Explain your thinking, too. "I think the baby is having fun swimming in the fish tank. I notice that Carl is holding on to her so she will not drown.....but I don't think it is a safe thing to do. What do you think? Why?"

It is not realistic to expect a child to perform an abstract task without lots and lots of practice!!!

 

[sunset30]

Thanks for that perspective. Me, I have no clue what 3-4 yr olds should be able to do, but according to his tacher he is really not doing this as they expect and see from other kids in his class, but, maybe they have high expectations?

We read to him a LOT, as he really likes it, but he memorises even longer books, word for word, and loves to look at the words, working them out etc, he has no interest in pictures etc
Lx

 

[Piper]

Thanks for that perspective. Me, I have no clue what 3-4 yr olds should be able to do, but according to his tacher he is really not doing this as they expect and see from other kids in his class, but, maybe they have high expectations?

We read to him a LOT, as he really likes it, but he memorises even longer books, word for word, and loves to look at the words, working them out etc, he has no interest in pictures etc
Lx

Try the Carl books--they are very interesting and can be "read" a lot of different ways. If he likes words, let him make up the story and you write it on sticky notes for him to read. Be sure to write it exactly the way he says it. Allow him to make changes to his words, tell him that it is okay for an author to change his words....that is called editing and authors edit their words a lot!

I had very high expectations for my class -- 18 of them left reading and writing, 5 on a second semester of first grade level (out of 40 students 2 half day classes) and these are low-income kiddos and/or children speaking another language at home (several with ADHD or HF Autism.) Some teachers expect kids to "know" how to do things without actually teaching them. I can't tell you how many teachers were amazed at what my studens knew and could do.....but I model a lot, challenge them, and make them want to learn. If you tell a 4 year old you are going to try to trick them--they learn what you want them to learn so that you can't trick them. If you say, "People say you're too lttle to do this, but I'm going to let you learn it." They learn because they think they are putting one over on others!

 

[emeraldmom]

You are beginning what will likely be a long journey, but it's not all bad. It sounds like your son is probably on the high end of the spectrum, which is a good thing. My 12 year old DS is an "aspie", he has Asperger's Syndrome. Asperger's is synonymous with High Functioning Austism. There used to be slight distinctions, but they are doing away with them. Our journey started before my DS (he was my first also) was a year old. I knew he was different. We went through a laundry list of diagnoses with different care providers. It wasn't until he was in kindergarten that we got the autism diagnosis. As I learned about it, it fit, and felt right.

Just to give you some hope, there are some kids who are called "twice exceptional". My DS is one of those, he is autistic, but he is also intellectually gifted. He still has issues and difficulties that we struggle with (BOY do we struggle). At the same time, he is attending the gifted magnet middle school, and taking classes several years above his grade level. THis past year he was in sixth grade, his end of the year averages were 4 A's and 4 B's. Also, he says the kids there are as weird as he is, so he loves it. He has friends, and feels like they *get* his in a way the kids at his elementary school never did. Being *weird* is not always a bad thing. One of his former teachers said it best, she said he's not weird, he's quirky.

Okay, on to WDW. If he will tolerate being in his stroller, that is a great option. My 12 year old still gets nervous around parade and fireworks time when it is SUPER (think wall-to-wall bodies) crowded. The stroller could be a good refuge for him. When it is less crowded, maybe he would like to push the stroller. If you think he would like looking for hidden Mickeys, there is a book about them, tells you where to look, I got mine at Barnes and Noble. I HIGHLY recommend a hand held game system. Both of my boys started with plain Nintendo Gameboys, they now both have Nintendo DS's. For the DS, they make a cover that you can get called Nerf Armor, I wear the things bounce. We've hard ours several years, and neither has broken yet. There are also a number of hand held systems made specifically for the toddler/preschooler age group. If he's into tactile stuff, I used to keep things for mine to fiddle with. It could be a blanket, small toy, worry stones in a pocket, koosh ball, whatever works for him.

I would strat now with practicing waiting for things. As far as him being able to tell time, just don't give him a time. If he wants to know how long he will be in line, tell him "I don't know". It's an honest answer, and it prevents him from having an exact time. You could start with doing some of that now, and see how he does. I would get a GAC for him. I always get one for my DS. It is handled differently at different rides. In some cases it either makes the wait shorter, or allows you to wait in an area better suited for your child. Somebody posted (I think it was a different thread) about using treats, she used skittles. I think this could be a great idea. For each minute, five minutes, whatever length of time works for you, that he waits (more or less) calmly, he gets a treat. You could do skittles, m&m's, jelly beans, goldfish.

Okay, this is probably way too long, so I'll stop for now. My boys are carrying on and they really should be getting to bed. You work your trip in the best way for all of you. A rest period mid-day is a really good idea. Have a magical time. Embrace his quirkiness, and don't worry too much about what others think.

 

[kirstenb1]

also, we showed dd the rides and shows on Youtube for a couple of weeks before we left. This other suggestion is likely to be controversial, but oh well. We packed Children's Benadryl and used it the first night to get our 4 yr old to sleep. She has sleep issues at home. Last year's vacation at WDW was a complete nightmare in so many ways. Largely due to her being over-stimulated and unable to sleep.
After the first night, she was plain tired out from the parks, and pool. My other suggestion is, just ask your child thorughout the day how is he doing. We arrived at opening for each park, and 2 days, she was over stimulated by 11"30. So she and I went back to our room, which had chewy foods, crunchy, and soft foods. Plus favorite toys, like Play-Doh.

 

[Rekenna]

also, we showed dd the rides and shows on Youtube for a couple of weeks before we left. This other suggestion is likely to be controversial, but oh well. We packed Children's Benadryl and used it the first night to get our 4 yr old to sleep. She has sleep issues at home. Last year's vacation at WDW was a complete nightmare in so many ways. Largely due to her being over-stimulated and unable to sleep.
After the first night, she was plain tired out from the parks, and pool. My other suggestion is, just ask your child thorughout the day how is he doing. We arrived at opening for each park, and 2 days, she was over stimulated by 11"30. So she and I went back to our room, which had chewy foods, crunchy, and soft foods. Plus favorite toys, like Play-Doh.

Our Developmental Pediatrician said to try OTC Melatonin to help with sleep. I will try it out at home first and if it works I will make sure to take some with us. DS2 is Autistic and while he sleeps well, it takes him a long time to fall asleep at night, he likes to go to bed (crib) with his juice cup, and he will happily play in his crib for 1-3 hours a night before falling asleep, no matter how late we put him to bed.

A well rested child will have much more fun than a child who was not able to sleep!

 

[Blanche_Neige]

This other suggestion is likely to be controversial, but oh well. We packed Children's Benadryl and used it the first night to get our 4 yr old to sleep. She has sleep issues at home.

I also wanted to do this but with gravol (same desired effect) the first time we went on the plane. I was terriffied that he was going to threw a tantrum. DS who is autistic refuse to take He had a great plane ride, everything was perfect, he loved it. When we landed he said "again!"

But some doctor will recommend this methode benadryl/gravol- Our dentist did before the appointment but DS never take any meds... Consult your doctor to find out the maximum dosage for your child.

Our Developmental Pediatrician said to try OTC Melatonin to help with sleep.

I have used Melatonin, a natural sleep aide, many many time for my kids. DS who is also autistic had also trouble falling asleep. Sometime we would wake up in the middle of the night for hrs. we gave it to him then too. This help a lot.

It's not a sleeping pill, it help you fall asleep. You can still wake up and you feel fine, not groggy like with a sleeping pill. Try it yourself and see!

By keeping a regular calming routine and giving him the melatonin, it helped regulate his sleep. Now he is 8, we don't use it much anymore. Only certain period in the year, like time change, he seems to need it.

Good luck