Ha! This "snowflake" behaviour is hard to beat!

[Imzadi]

I am right there with you, and I have two kids with special needs. Neither of whom were allowed to act out in public, scream or throw things at the table, or in any way impinge on another patron's good time. If that means we get up and leave, then we get up and leave. Just because my boys have difficulty sitting still doesn't mean I have the right to let them run wild "because they're disabled, ya know." NO!

We started teaching our kids from an early age how to act at the table, in the store, at church, at Chuck E.Cheese, etc. Even Christian is expected to behave himself at the table. Especially Christian! Because it takes him so long to learn, so many repetitions of the *right* behavior for him to get it, we had to start from the age of 2. When he'd try to throw a cup or flip his plate, we pounced right on that. What might elicit an "awwww, ain't that cute" at age 2 will NOT be so cute at 22.

The same goes for non-disabled kids, too. IT's much easier to train kids when they're small. If parents don't do their job, then you have kids who don't have the grounding they need and they become attention-seeking, petulant tyrants.

Thank YOU! A child's brain isn't even fully formed at age 5 or age 8. To act like a child, especially a special needs child can't be taught or changed is setting them on a long, bad path. What's that saying, "Prepare the child for the path, not the path for the child"?

 

[cheermom1]

I got attacked by a snowflake mother this weekend. At a track meet...brought 5 people, so I brought 5 chairs....and snacks and water. Come back after watching my DS14 run.....family is sitting in our chairs, eating our snacks and drinking our water out of the cooler. Okay, willing to share. BUT....then their son starts throwing my fruit snacks at me and complaining because they are generic. THEN he pours MY open bottle of water all over my chair because "he is hot". I told him to knock it off or his a** was grass....okay, shouldn't have used the word a**....mom went ballistic. She started with "unlike you, I am a Christian" and went on to accuse me of cussing her son out (we must be terrible parents because that word isn't all that bad at our house), accusing him of criminal behavior, and attacking him. Told me she was keeping her DH close by "in case".......her hubby just sat there, and her son had moved to one of our dry chairs and continued to eat his way through our "generic" snacks.

Wanted to smack her....but that WOULD have been unChristian. Went for a walk and sat in the stands instead of the tent for the rest of the meet (About 4 hours). Calmed down, but have a terrible sunburn. Afraid if I went back I might say something I shouldn't....and this kid IS on OUR team....oh, and the kid is 15, almost 16....not a small child.


Guess my potty mouth (hey, it's a word you can say on TV) and my ungiving attitude make me a heathen.......well, so be it! Next time I am hiding my generic snacks!

You handled it better than I would too. I would have told her to fly a kite and to give me back my stuff and go away!! I would have stayed there too and told her that IF she had a problem she could go sit in the stands!

 

[Val]

Oh, believe me, I wanted to say all sorts of things....but believe it or not our team is traveling to WDW in 12 days, and I have to be with this woman during the EPSN RISE games.....it was better that I walk away than say what I wanted to say.

Yes, they sat in our chairs and ate our snacks.....again, we sometimes will sit in a chair when someone is off watching a race, but protocol is to ALWAYS get up when the owner returns. We share snacks....but again, protocol is to wait until offered!

I am a university professor in a VERY conservative town. My DH, a prof at another university in our town, has a rep as one of the most liberal people around (hint: he writes a hippie prof blog) and is very politically active. I do not share many (okay, most) of my DH's beliefs, but often am lumped with him by virtue of marriage. But, after 25 years, it's too late to change him, so we stick to neutral topics like WDW line cutting, overcrowding rooms and POP Warner football. This woman is well known as a dragon lady, and is very domineering.......and is well known to HATE my DH. She just isn't worth the battle......but next time instead of Walmart smiley fruit snacks I think I will look for grumpy faced ones.....and practice my aim towards HER!

Anyway, hopefully my DS14 knows he isn't a snowflake....more like a mud ball. He ain't perfect.......but I love him like crazy anyway. And please, if you see my DS misbehaving, yell at him for me......I can't be everywhere!

 

[cm8]

I wonder what was so special about Lane 4. Over my dead body would I move out of a lane because DD was pouty!

 

[Beckypooh1972]

Could she have had some special needs, DD5 is special needs and among the things that she has is OCD and we have had issues with things with numbers. Not excusing if there are no issues but when your child is special needs sometime you just have to do things that seem crazy to prevent a complete meltdown and by the way my DD5's name is Sarah

That's what I was thinking too... sometimes people misinterpret parents' actions with their kids. My son has PDD, which is part of the autism spectrum disorder, he absolutely is fixated on "stuff", he can't rest if he can't find a particular toy or if a toy needs batteries or is broken. He comes across as annoying and we probably seem indulgent. It is really wearying for me and my husband - we usually try to meet him halfway because we know he can't help it - it's how he's wired. Sometimes, we are able to talk him out of it, other times he wears us down until we help him with his request.

 

[Sparx]

I love how it only takes to the fourth or fifth post these days for a brat to be labeled with four or five or six possible disabilities by the dis psychiatric gallery.

Spoiled rotten brats are the norm when children (or adults for that matter) are acting up. Disorders and disabilities are not. The majority of children who are acting up are NOT disabled, autistic, MR, or anything else. In fact, most of the time the disabled children are the most well behaved that I see.

 

[Beckypooh1972]

I like little Sarah. She has ALL the power. What's really funny is that she didn't even throw a fit....just pouted and they did whatever she wanted.



Birthday fruit?! Sorry it just struck me as funny. Not only does she have to wait for bratty little bro to fake blowout birthday candles...all she gets is fruit.

Birthday fruit? Poor kid!

 

[Disneycrazy!!]

sorry deleted my post...

 

[mamacatnv]

My neighbor has a 5 yr old who is severly mentally ********, developmentally delayed, has a chromosonal abnormality, epilepsy and the list goes on and on.
He is a beast. I have known him since birth, I don't put up with much from anyones children and he is no exception. I love that little guy more than any kid other than my own and I know he is going to need all the love, support and protection we can give him. However that does not mean I will let him hit me, bite me, throw stuff, scream, play with the contents of his diaper, eat nothing but cookies, abuse the dog etc........

I have no issues with him when I am in charge, he and I have established who is in charge but his parents have no control whatsoever. They are lazy, in denial and lack discipline skills, it is easier to tune him out or say "well he is special needs" uhhuh........

So one day Dad says to me after he threw a fit "how long will this stage last?" and I said "as long as you allow it" oh Dad got all sorts of ticked off at me.

Sarah was being an indulged brat, her Mother is feeding into it and Dad has been overruled and defeated. I have no respect for either one of them, they are the type of parent that I abhor, they are not doing anyone any favors.

 

[AlleyKat]

I got attacked by a snowflake mother this weekend. At a track meet...brought 5 people, so I brought 5 chairs....and snacks and water. Come back after watching my DS14 run.....family is sitting in our chairs, eating our snacks and drinking our water out of the cooler. Okay, willing to share. BUT....then their son starts throwing my fruit snacks at me and complaining because they are generic. THEN he pours MY open bottle of water all over my chair because "he is hot". I told him to knock it off or his a** was grass....okay, shouldn't have used the word a**....mom went ballistic. She started with "unlike you, I am a Christian" and went on to accuse me of cussing her son out (we must be terrible parents because that word isn't all that bad at our house), accusing him of criminal behavior, and attacking him. Told me she was keeping her DH close by "in case".......her hubby just sat there, and her son had moved to one of our dry chairs and continued to eat his way through our "generic" snacks.

Wow, I wonder how she would have conducted herself if she professed to be an atheist or agnostic.

it was better that I walk away than say what I wanted to say.

This woman is well known as a dragon lady, and is very domineering.......and is well known to HATE my DH.

next time instead of Walmart smiley fruit snacks I think I will look for grumpy faced ones....

A self-professed Christian that doesn't hide the fact that she hates your husband...hmmm....

You'll feel a whole lot better if you stand firm and lay things on the line with the "dragon lady".

Never mind grumpy faced snacks, buy a bag of prunes!

 

[NHdisneylover]

I am right there with you, and I have two kids with special needs. Neither of whom were allowed to act out in public, scream or throw things at the table, or in any way impinge on another patron's good time. If that means we get up and leave, then we get up and leave. Just because my boys have difficulty sitting still doesn't mean I have the right to let them run wild "because they're disabled, ya know." NO!

We started teaching our kids from an early age how to act at the table, in the store, at church, at Chuck E.Cheese, etc. Even Christian is expected to behave himself at the table. Especially Christian! Because it takes him so long to learn, so many repetitions of the *right* behavior for him to get it, we had to start from the age of 2. When he'd try to throw a cup or flip his plate, we pounced right on that. What might elicit an "awwww, ain't that cute" at age 2 will NOT be so cute at 22.

The same goes for non-disabled kids, too. IT's much easier to train kids when they're small. If parents don't do their job, then you have kids who don't have the grounding they need and they become attention-seeking, petulant tyrants.

Fantastic post. I couldn't agree more.

 

[tonilea]

I am going with brat. Her parents would have anticipated that being in the "wrong" line might be an issue for her if she had "issues". Nope, IMO, she demanded a line change because she could.

 

[disneyjunkie]

I got attacked by a snowflake mother this weekend. At a track meet...brought 5 people, so I brought 5 chairs....and snacks and water. Come back after watching my DS14 run.....family is sitting in our chairs, eating our snacks and drinking our water out of the cooler. Okay, willing to share. BUT....then their son starts throwing my fruit snacks at me and complaining because they are generic. THEN he pours MY open bottle of water all over my chair because "he is hot". I told him to knock it off or his a** was grass....okay, shouldn't have used the word a**....mom went ballistic. She started with "unlike you, I am a Christian" and went on to accuse me of cussing her son out (we must be terrible parents because that word isn't all that bad at our house), accusing him of criminal behavior, and attacking him. Told me she was keeping her DH close by "in case".......her hubby just sat there, and her son had moved to one of our dry chairs and continued to eat his way through our "generic" snacks.

Wanted to smack her....but that WOULD have been unChristian. Went for a walk and sat in the stands instead of the tent for the rest of the meet (About 4 hours). Calmed down, but have a terrible sunburn. Afraid if I went back I might say something I shouldn't....and this kid IS on OUR team....oh, and the kid is 15, almost 16....not a small child.


Guess my potty mouth (hey, it's a word you can say on TV) and my ungiving attitude make me a heathen.......well, so be it! Next time I am hiding my generic snacks!

You're a saint. That woman's ears would have been on fire by the time I got through with her and her greedy son. I would have said more than just ***.

Next time pack a nice big cooler of ice cold prune juice. Maybe greedy boy will help himself to that. If you're lucky, he'll share it with his nutty mother.

 

[disneyjunkie]

Fantastic post. I couldn't agree more.

I just watched your Breaking Free video. It was great.

Off to check out the Med video.

 

[NHdisneylover]

I just watched your Breaking Free video. It was great.

Off to check out the Med video.

Aww thanks My DH puts them together for our family and freinds to see what we are up to--so he gets ALL the credit.

 

[LisaNJ25]

Daddy should have left to do the grocery shopping and never came back

 

[NotUrsula]

RE: the track meet -- why on earth did you not call over a security guard? If they were eating your food they were stealing, and little Mr. Issues needed to be scared straight. (Besides, it would have distracted his nasty mother and given her the guard to focus on instead of you.)

I failed to say it in my original post, but in the case that the OP described, I think it WAS probably brattiness. 5 will get you 10 that the reason that she wanted Aisle 4 was not OCD, but a friendly cashier who gives out goodies. My grocery store has one lady that will always give DD3 stickers when we visit -- naturally she has a preference for whatever line that lady happens to be working. If she asks nicely if we can visit with Miss Judy I normally have no objection, but if I say no, then I expect her to deal with that without whining.

I know someone like this. Her DH has just been beaten down by the arguments that they have every time he tries to discipline their child, and most of the time he just lets her have her way because he's tired to death of fighting and he doesn't want to further strain their own relationship. It's sad, because he wanted a big family originally, but is now adamant that their child will remain an only.

 

[Carnie]

I got attacked by a snowflake mother this weekend. At a track meet...brought 5 people, so I brought 5 chairs....and snacks and water. Come back after watching my DS14 run.....family is sitting in our chairs, eating our snacks and drinking our water out of the cooler. Okay, willing to share. BUT....then their son starts throwing my fruit snacks at me and complaining because they are generic. THEN he pours MY open bottle of water all over my chair because "he is hot". I told him to knock it off or his a** was grass....okay, shouldn't have used the word a**....mom went ballistic. She started with "unlike you, I am a Christian" and went on to accuse me of cussing her son out (we must be terrible parents because that word isn't all that bad at our house), accusing him of criminal behavior, and attacking him. Told me she was keeping her DH close by "in case".......her hubby just sat there, and her son had moved to one of our dry chairs and continued to eat his way through our "generic" snacks.

Wanted to smack her....but that WOULD have been unChristian. Went for a walk and sat in the stands instead of the tent for the rest of the meet (About 4 hours). Calmed down, but have a terrible sunburn. Afraid if I went back I might say something I shouldn't....and this kid IS on OUR team....oh, and the kid is 15, almost 16....not a small child.


Guess my potty mouth (hey, it's a word you can say on TV) and my ungiving attitude make me a heathen.......well, so be it! Next time I am hiding my generic snacks!

I am STUNNED. And amazed by your patience. I would have had them thrown out!

And as for the other one, I blame HFCS. Clearly.

 

[AustinTink]

Just to clarify... what is the DIS definition of a "snowflake"? I've seen it on multiple threads, used for multiple definitions. Can someone enlighten me?

Going by this thread, it's a brat that throws tantrums in public and manipulates their parents. Is that the gist of it? I wanna make sure I use the term in the proper context.

 

[JessicaR]

The only person in that family that has problems is Dad, two big ones at leasy maybe more at home! Sorry, but that dad is whipped.