Grrr, Seriously?!!!

[kikiq]

I'm glad OP decided not to go. My family has gone on very few vacations and every day of them is precious. I would not want to take the time to go to a shower that I was told about the night before my trip. Now if they had sent an invite a month ahead of time then I would probably try to make it work but a half-butted phone invite the night before we leave? No way. Add in the upcoming deployment. Absolutely no way!

I'm all about family but in this case, an invite ahead of time, more notice. And please, time alone before deployment is PRECIOUS!!!

 

[kaabost]

I'm all about family but in this case, an invite ahead of time, more notice. And please, time alone before deployment is PRECIOUS!!!

Ditto that!

 

[StephC1217]

Kcrit- you took the words out of my mouth!

 

[MeanestMomEver]

Would the nephew & baby momma adjust their vacation plans to attend a gathering in your home? I'm thinking no. It's just a baby shower. Send a gift, wish them well and go on vacation.

They don't get to but into your plans just because your destination is nearby.

If they have a problem with it then they are selfish and childish.

That's my opinion and I am sticking to it.

 

[Lyndria]

I wouldn't miss a chance to celebrate family and a new baby for a few hours in a themepark.

 

[Cee]

I can certainly understand considering the baby shower since you will be in the area. Having said THAT, I would feel as you do and not want to attend. So I wouldn't. But I'm old and don't care anymore if someone gets mad at me.

 

[GinnyEmma]

Lol, I'm old enough to appreciate extended family, and connections. I never understand the whole "I am old" so no one else matters, thing.

Eta: I was a marine brat and family was what you could count on. Not just our family but everyone else too. Friends came and went but you could count on the grands, aunts and uncles and cousins.

 

[duffy]

All this drama for a baby shower? Really? Just buy a gift and send it.

And if anyone gives you grief, remind them that this is your time to focus on each other before deployment-it actually sounds like a second honeymoon! Tell them the truth: you want to spend as much time alone with each other as possible on this trip, and would rather not attend.

Don't play any passive-aggressive games, just be upfront and honest. You're allowing yourself to be pulled into a huge stinking drama situation. "No, sorry, we can't be there. We've already made plans." Don't even elaborate. Change the subject.

 

[MelanieC]

I'd politely decline and go about my vacation. My vacation is important to me and even though I go for two weeks I wouldn't stop in the middle of my vacation and most likely in the middle of one of my days to go to a baby shower knowing that I'll see them in July. It's not like your giving up visiting the baby, it's just a shower and she will be so busy she won't really even notice your there.

Your vacation is important, especially with hubby deploying. Go, enjoy and don't think about it again. Have a wonderful trip with your hubby and family.

 

[GinnyEmma]

All this drama for a baby shower? Really? Just buy a gift and send it.

And if anyone gives you grief, remind them that this is your time to focus on each other before deployment-it actually sounds like a second honeymoon! Tell them the truth: you want to spend as much time alone with each other as possible on this trip, and would rather not attend.

Don't play any passive-aggressive games, just be upfront and honest. You're allowing yourself to be pulled into a huge stinking drama situation. "No, sorry, we can't be there. We've already made plans." Don't even elaborate. Change the subject.

This is pretty much the common sense reaction. Were I not so big on family this non drama way of dealing would have been my advice. The op chose instead to make it into a drama.

 

[TandLMommy28]

So they planned this entire baby shower around you but never bothered to tell you about it? That doesn't add up to me. Perhaps it was a coincidence and once they realized you would be there for it, they made it sound like they did it all for you. Just a thought. Either way, it was wrong of them to spring this on you at the last minute and I think that gives you the right to say no. If you'd known months ago, it would be totally different.

I would go if I didn't have ADRs or other stuff going on. But if I DID have an ADR during that time, I would very politely say, "I really wish you had told us sooner, I have meal reservations that were really hard to get."

I would also do some damage control such as inviting the family to meet up with YOU at the park at some point during the week. That way if they say no, it's on them, not you, because you tried to make it right.

 

[duffy]

This is pretty much the common sense reaction. Were I not so big on family this non drama way of dealing would have been my advice. The op chose instead to make it into a drama.

I agree. This should not even be an issue!

Just say, "no thanks, we can't make it." All the talk about a sister, and seeing them in July, and that it's really not a close relative, even the fact that your husband will be deployed...makes absolutely no difference. Just adds to the drama.

You can't make it. Period.

 

[lizzyb]

This is pretty much the common sense reaction. Were I not so big on family this non drama way of dealing would have been my advice. The op chose instead to make it into a drama.

The only drama I see is your posts. You made your opinion which happens to be the less popular one. Move on and stop beating a dead horse.

 

[duffy]

The only drama I see is your posts. You made your opinion which happens to be the less popular one. Move on and stop beating a dead horse.

LOL, I see a lot of drama in the original poster's posts! And a lot of drama queens on this thread.

 

[-Jody-]

I honestly wouldn't go. It's YOUR family vacation, and I wouldn't trade that togetherness time for anyone.

You're not obligated to go to a shower, just like anyone else.

Best reply award. I couldn't agree more.

Sometimes you have to be blunt about it, it appears selfish and mean but the other party needs to understand. Place the shoe on the other foot.

Honestly, even my wife agrees, we'd say no. Maybe send a gift and such but you're on "vacation" and that is the #1 most important thing.

 

[KellyNY]

I did not read the whole thread so maybe it was said already. If you have enough days on your vacation and your DH wants to go , why not.It is only one day.
However, it is not like a wedding or something, it is just a party, and if you will not go, it is not a big deal, just send a gift and best wishes.
I do not believe that they planned event in their family around your vacation but since you are there anyway why not to invite. Many people do not understand that you have plans, the plan is to relax from reality, work, extended family and friends. Talk to your DH, tell him how you feel and go from there. If you say NO to family, be honest, although they still may not understand you, who cares. It is your family,your vacation and you will be one waiting and missing your DH for a year.

 

[PrincessTiffany]

hmmmm...isn't calling people names rather obnoxious behavior?

The op put the info out there. No one said, "you have to go rag on your husband's family to an entire internet board." Given that information, I am giving my opinion of the situation. Ignore me if you like. Easy Peasy.

Sorry, but I have to agree, your posts on this thread have been way, over the top, obnoxious to the OP. Giving your "opinion" is one thing, you are just being mean.

The OP has made her decision and decided not to go, this thread just needs to die and go away.

 

[smidgy]

before this thread gets closed... I bartend at a VFW post.I brought up this thread (I want to mention that one of our young members was wounded in Texas, from the recent sniper, and we have members deployed.) to the post members,.

of course ...they all thought the guy should do what he wanted to do. and most guys would want to be with his family.. and NO GUY, EVER.would CHOOSE a SHOWER, of any type over a day of a family vacation before DEPLOYMENT!!!... um.. did anyone hear DEPLOYMENT?
and. everyone knows ,baby showers are just for the women anyway.

 

[smidgy]

OMG! last baby shower I went to was for my grandDAUGHTER...AND i WAS BORED!!!

SORRY but you can only attend so many baby showers,. I am 54 years old. back, in the day, the god mother threw a shower, an aunt threw another shower.

now.. if you are slightyly even related to someone you know'
(and heaven HELP YOUif one of your kids remarries!!!!)
well... OY! govoyt! oopss=! and I'm not even Jewish, or Yiddish. but Im German... oops.)

 

[Lisa x]

The OP is probably having a fab time in WDW right now (Im jealous )!

Baby showers are starting to hit the UK now, its never really been the thing to do over here but its just starting to get popular! I can honestly say though, I would never have a baby shower, Im just not into that kinda thing! And, I would never change any plans I had with my family to attend a baby shower either!

Would not miss a birth, would not miss a wedding, would not miss a milestone birthday party.....but a baby shower???

Anyway, I think the OP made the right decision in staying with her immediate family in WDW and calling in to see mum-to-be on the way out of the area!