Grandparents watching Grandkids

[AnnaFloridaLover]

When my DGD was in preschool I used to bring her and pick her up. My DH worked down the road, so he often was there when I dropped her off and almost always came by for pick up time. The teachers told my DD that it was a while before they figured out we were not confused about who was picking Kady up, but that DH just liked to stop by to see her. LOL!

The thing is that child care is not a commitment to jump into, and certainly not one to make if you really are nto up to the task. If a grand is not able or willing to do so, there shoudl be other avenues parents travel. No grand parent shoudl be guilted into caring for kids, and no parent should be guilted into leaving kids with their parents if that is not the right decision for them.

I think some grandparent do it because they want to help but realize it's just too time consuming and many of them just don't have the energy anymore. Some of the grandparents seemed like they were always snapping at the kids and had a lack of patience probably because they were tired or just not happy with the circumstances.

I hope to be able to help my kids with their own someday but I also know I will set out rules and it won't be a full time job. Been there, done that.

 

[georgina]

We plan to move closer to DD in 2-3 years as she and her DH are hoping to have children then. I want to be able to help her out, as they both have demanding jobs, but we will have to work out a schedule. I have discussed with DD that we plan to move to the area and she is OK with it. My parents weren't around my kids much at all (different city), but mom and dad watched my niece and nephews when they were young and they had a much closer relationship than with my kids.

 

[dosekies]

My mother watches my niece pretty often. My sister in law is an ER nurse with crazy hours and my brother frequently works over seas for months at a time. Since she was born (she's almost 6), my parents have watched her at least 2 weekends a month Friday - Sunday even though my B and SIL live almost 1.5 hours away. They absolutely love it. My parents are relatively young still (55) and always take her out with them to festivals and hang out with my aunts and uncles and cousins - my niece looks forward to it and loves hanging out with everyone. They will even ask to keep her longer some weekends so she can go with them to our vacation home and go boating and snowmobiling. Sometimes when my parents have to bring her back on Sundays they drop her off at her other grandparents and she always says she doesn't want to go there because they're not fun haha. My brother and sister in law actually had another baby just yesterday so I'm interested to see how it goes with my parents babysitting two of them now when the time comes! Also, they do this all while my dad works full time and my mom works part time mon-thursday!

 

[Nancyg56]

I think some grandparent do it because they want to help but realize it's just too time consuming and many of them just don't have the energy anymore. Some of the grandparents seemed like they were always snapping at the kids and had a lack of patience probably because they were tired or just not happy with the circumstances.

I hope to be able to help my kids with their own someday but I also know I will set out rules and it won't be a full time job. Been there, done that.

My own Mom did that with my brothers and my sisters kids. I thought it was too much for her and I used to take them with me. Her patience was low by then as was her stamina.

I knwo that now, if another little one came along, I would not have the energy needed to provide full time day care. I woudl love to, but I would not be the best choice to care for a lively little one all week long.

 

[RF536]

We were blessed that my MIL offered to watch our older son when I went back to work at 6 weeks then our younger one as well, when I returned to work. I think the main reason it worked for her was that I have always had a straight 8-5 Mon-Friday job. While DH is a paramedic and until our younger son was in 1st grade, he worked 2nd and 3rd shift, which meant that MIL only had them for 2-3 hours at a time at most 3 days a week. By the time DH was able to switch to 1st shift the kids were in school and FIL had retired so he was home to help with the boys. They would pick the boys up from the bus take them to their house and watch them after school and then had them all the time when school was out. They also used to take them on trips with them and different day trips during the summer and school breaks. We used to joke that summer were spent at Camp Grandma Grandpa, because they had all sorts of stuff for them to do. They would go canoeing, do archery, go for walks, go to museums, zoos, ride bikes and play in the backyard.
My boys are older now and still go to my in-laws a few times a month to just visit.

My parents are also involved with my boys, it is just a different relationship. They both worked when my boys were little, but made sure they were at all school functions, scouting events and sporting events. They would keep the boys anytime we asked and would take them for vacations each summer. Their relationship is strong because my parents made the effort to be involved and present in their lives.