Goal Getting....my journey....lmhall2000

[lmhall2000]

Well, yesterday I cheated with 10 chocolate chips I also had 2 diet cokes and only 2 waters. Not to mention the soy on my chicken and salt on my cheeseburger pattie...so I'm hoping it's just water retention. But I'm committing today to avoid all diet drinks and only have water and watch the salt on my foods. We'll see what happens...I do like weighing everyday because the losses keep me positive and any gains make me take seriously the foods I'm eating...I didn't beat myself up like I usually do with a gain and then just blow it from there....

I'm in in until GOAL!!!!

(Thanks to all you gals for all your support....I can't tell you how it keeps me motivated to stay strong!)

Tara

 

[lmhall2000]

This was the first morning I did not have a loss...I even showed a gain...I had the scales on the same floor tile I have them on every day...and even weighed 3x...it showed 198.5 3x....well after breakfast 2 eggs, 2 bacon and 1 16 oz. glass of water I got ready for my bath and decided to weigh again...just curious how all that food and water would weigh....well then I weighed 197.5!!! 3x in a row...

How can I lose a pound by adding more than a pound of matter into my body....I don't live in a mansion so the walk from the kitchen to the bathroom could not have burned off a pound of something...cooking is not all that strenuous...so what gives????

I guess I've learned that like people scales have their shortcomings...and I'm too cheap to invest in a very nice set of doctor scales...so I'll go with the flow and hopefull tomorrow be done with 198 for good!!! Hoping to see 196 and less the next weeks!

Venting over....don't ya just love journaling????

 

[lmhall2000]

Well, I've come to know two kinds of stress...the kind that makes you want to cheat and the kind that makes you want to stop eating altogether....

Now, mind you this isn't up there with losing a parent or a bad car accident but it's my measurement of where I lose my appetite.

Today, my 9 year old sweet son was walking our 11 year old lab mix member of our family around the block...he's been doing this daily to show he's responsible because he wants a puppy to add to our family. The neighbors across the street have a doberman...see where I'm headed?...well, the doberman was off the leash roaming free and hates other dogs (as commented by his owners in the past)....my son said the dog saw Sable as they were heading up our driveway on return from their walk and the dog attacked our dog. My son dropped the leash...I'm so proud of him...just knowing he was near a raving doberman brings fear to me...but he was safe...however, our beloved pet suffered a torn ligament from the aggression. She needs surgery which will cost over $2,000! I'm so sick to my stomach...one...I know our dog can't go walking on 3 legs....two..I'm concerned about surgery and her ability to heal...she's in great shape but this will surely stress her out. I'm just feeling awfully icky right now.

Venting done...will deal with all this with a clearer mind hopefully after writing all my thoughts down...

Tara

 

[wiskband]

Hi tara. hope your well............ I hear ya about stress. Hard to focus on being healthy when life gets int he way! Just curious as to what the neighbors think of this? I mean I guess I can assume because they are the type that left their dog ( a dooberman no less ) out to roam free in the neighborhood, they probably dont care about your dog. Well anyway, I truely feel for you, having neighbor issues really stinks!
Now! about the scale. lol! that is a tricky gadget! I tell ya. I used to do just that everyday, all day! AND................ your just driving yourself mad! Dont waste yor time really. Heres something else to think about! your scale is probably not accurate at all. Most BR sacles aren;t. So you are wanting to be at 186 you may actually be that already. Do you go to a gym or an weight loss center? I would use one of their scales. I mean your BR is good every now and then to make sure your not gaining to much but, as far as being precise. It's probably not.
I have learned to just stay off of my scale. I know its hard but, out of sight, out of mind. I put mine in my shed so, it was hard to get to. Anyway, good luck, I be checking in on ya.
take care

renee

 

[geetey]

Oh, Tara. My heart is just crying out for you. All of this mess with the house, and showings, and moving vacation time, and now your poor dog has been attacked. I am glad your ds is okay but your poor poor dog. It just isn't right. I hope the neighbors step up and offer to assist with the costs of healing your lab mix.

I understand the pain and stress of having a house on the market when your spouse is out of state. I pray for you daily that this chapter will end soon. Just in time for you to move into that house in Huntsville!

Keep journaling! We're here for you!!

 

[lmhall2000]

You're a beacon in my day today!! I wish I could just chunk those scales but I went a year without them and gained almost 20 pounds...ugh! So just to get back into the habit I'm going to weigh daily for this first month only...then it'll be weekly and probably at the gym only. It takes me about 4 weeks to rebuild a habit...3 weeks just doesn't cut it...I'm too tricky for my own good!

The neighbors...oh the neighbors...oh do I really even go there? I've been to two veterinarians today to try and get second opinions...I'm even going tomorrow for a third....so far the consensus is a torn anterior cruciate ligament and she needs surgery. The wife called after receiving my message and gave me a long list of what is going wrong in her life right now...and sadly, she's right, her life is in shambles in many different ways...my heart just broke for her. She was very kind and said to just take care and do whatever I needed to do to get Sable well and they would cover it. I did file a police report in case they needed it for their homeowners...but she said they would just pay outright. Feeling a little bit better...but still the thought of our 11 year old dog going under anesthesia makes me weak. Then, her husband comes to my door and starts making excuses...earlier today he denied owning a doberman..only said he had a miniature doberman....yes, I've lived here 3 years and have seen his wife walk both almost daily...don't know what that was about. He started on how he and his wife are going through a divorce and he broke his ankle and when the dog got out he couldn't go get her.....(isn't this an admission he KNEW his dog was out????) and went on that she's never attacked another dog that if she sees children she'll run to them and want to play....my children have been out many times while she was out leashed and she never expressed an interest to play with them...she bee-lined it to attack my dog not to "play"....to continue...he's apparently "well connected" and very wealthy and wants his attorney to talk to my attorney...he wants to fly "his" veterinarian from another city into get a 4th opinion...to make sure I'm not putting my pet through a needless surgery...and he questions his liability...oh it went on and on....he's going to make a $2500 bill turn into a $5000 fiasco and who is suffering while we're waiting for his doc to fly down? MY DOG!!!!! The poor thing follows me everywhere I go...I am her mother...she imprinted on me as a pup and she has to be within 5 feet of me at all times. Tonight I went to tuck the kids in their beds...I blocked the stairs so Sable would stay down...I could hear her struggling trying to get through the chairs and then when she pushed one out of the way she tried to climb the stairs with 3 legs and fell 4x before I could yell at the kids I couldn't tuck them in I had to take care of Sable. My kids are upset...it's been a long stressful day...and I'm just sad as can be. I'm hoping this vet tomorrow will be kind enough to call the vet in Nashville and they can have a chat...the vet said surgery is best if done within the first week of the injury...I'm not waiting for some vet from another city to make time for my dog....


AAAAAGGGGGHHHHHHH!!!!!!!

Tara

 

[DisneyEnthusiastic]

I'm so sorry for what you are going through Tara. Our pets are as important as our children in many ways. I don't think I would worry about waiting for your neighbors vet to fly in. How crazy is that? I know it's a hard decision to make...but I'm sure that you don't want your dog to be suffering either. I'm sure she is in pain. It sounds like your neighbor is worried that you may want more than just taking care of the dog. It's so sad that people think that way these days. Here you are concerned about your dog and you need to do what is best for Sable.

Stay strong!

Gail

 

[plutosmyfav]

Tara,

I can't believe your dog story. How scary and stressful. I have the same two responses to stress: eat endlessly or stop eating altogether. Your poor dog and poor DS for being caught in the situation. How scarey it must have been for him. sending pixie dust your way for your dog, your house showing and for that darn scale!!!!

Sundie

 

[Princess Michelle]

Tara

I feel so bad for your poor furbaby! More stress is the last thing you need. I hope that you can get her surgery soon and that your neighbors will take the responsibility to pay for it. for you for Sable <a href='http://www.smileycentral.com/?partner=ZSzeb008_ZSxdm31547US' target='_blank'><img src='http://smileys.smileycentral.com/cat/16/16_2_6.gif' alt='Dog 6' border=0></a>

 

[lmhall2000]

Had 10 chocolate chips again..I just didn't have the energy to make it to the store to buy groceries...only had 2 eggs today and 1 pork chop...I fixed the kids broccoli, noodles and pork chops but I hate broccoli and that's all I had left. I started feeling really weak (low blood sugar) and am out of peanut butter so I had 10 chips...hopefully tomorrow after Sable's surgery I can make it to the store for some salad fixins. Hope this won't stall my weight...I know undereating can do that.
Tara

 

[wilderness01]

I am so sorry about your dog. I hope the surgery goes well. That neighbor sounds like a piece of work. You take care of your dog and he can pay the bill. What is going to happen to his dog? Did they put him down?

Hang in there, everything will get better for you.

 

[geetey]

Blow off those chocolate chips, Tara. You don't to worry about those. Please remember to eat and take care of yourself. I know it's hard, but this would even harder if you were to get sick. I am here for you! Just a PM away!
I will be saying an extra prayer for Sable and her vet, so that things go smoothly and she pulls through with flying colors!

 

[lmhall2000]

Tomorrow is Sable's surgery and I'm just a nervous bundle...but I know it will be fine. Don't remember what I posted...but today when I called the owner to tell them we had scheduled the surgery...he was acidic and told me to sue him...he said my dog was old and injured herself, he's not liable. I know my dog went out for a walk on a leash with my 9 year old son, was attacked by his dog and my dog lost use of her hind leg...how can it be any clearer? So now I'm debating civil court or using an attorney and racking up even more costs. The owner also said he had taken his dog to the animal shelter and they said his dog played very well with the other dogs and they did not label her vicious...after talking with the animal shelter..I found out he lied...he had never been! He went 2 hours after I called him and they gave him a citation he'll either have to plead guilty to or go to court over. Now I've got to track down a copy of that, get a copy of the police report, find out all his information and serve him papers...first after the surgery tomorrow I'm going to send a certified letter with a copy of the bill...I can't be sure he and his wife are communicating and she agreed to pay all bills...so we'll just have to see...I am hoping to eat more tomorrow...I just hope my appetite is back.
Thanks gang...y'all are always there to sound off to and help me think clearly when all this hits.
Blessings,
Tara

 

[Alysa]

Oh there is so much I want to say - your pictures are so inspirational - you look just beautiful. I am so sorry to hear about your dog and your home. I have a saying I think of sometimes when I think I just can't bear it anymore "You are never given more than you can carry". Forget about the chips just take care. You will be sticking on that sold sign soon - you'll see!

P.S. I too gave up my scale for a year after DD was born and then I read that they had done a study and that over two years people who used the scale did 15% better than those who didn't. I hate my scale! 3 days solid exercising - no loss! Is peanut butter a low-carb no-no? That might explain a few things! Ooops!

Best wishes!

 

[lmhall2000]

AHHHHH...I feel like I can breathe now...appetite is still not there...or more of a despondent feel about not even wanting to go to the trouble of fixing or getting anything...ugh! I know I've got to be better to myself...and will hopefully be able to muster up some energy to make it to the grocery tonight.

Doc said that she did very well...I can pick her up tomorrow possibly if swelling and her ability to recover from anesthesia goes well....praying! He also said that she had no anomalies in the knee and that if that doberman had never attacked her she would have lived her life out without this happening...guess I need a notary to take his statement to court! UGH! I did write a letter just to the wife who had been so responsible at first....hoping her husband doesn't intercept it..if I don't hear a response...will have to file tomorrow...

Oh well...life is tough...we learn to appreciate little blessings...she's so intertwined in our lives...it's hard to imagine life without her...can't wait to bring her home!!!!

Last day of almost no carbs!! YIPPEE!!! I'll be much better about adding them in..but it will be so nice to have that 1/2 piece of wheat toast in the morning!!!

Thanks guys....y'all are such a support!
P.S. Alysa...you're ohhh so right...only given as much as we could bear...I only wish my real muscles were as strong as my "life" muscles right now!!! I feel extremely strong in all this and know it's making me a better person...just wish my real muscles would grow as quickly!
Tara

 

[geetey]

YEAH FOR SABLE!!

I know Sable will be coming home tomorrow! I am so happy she did so well in surgery. What a relief, huh? Here's to a smooth recovery for her. I bet the kids can't wait to have her back home again.

Enjoy those carbs. Just add them back VERY slowly and make good choices!

 

[CarolA]

Glad to hear Sable came thur ok.

Your neighbor sounds like a piece of work. I hope they don't live near me!

 

[lmhall2000]

Carol...can I send them to you? They are going through a divorce...maybe they'll take on a relocation...but I wouldn't wish them on even the prickliest cactus...maybe Siberia would work..nah...that's my sarcasm dripping though that doesn't help anyone...but it looks like court will be my only option...great attorney coached me today and I'm going without representation because he did not think I could get my attorney fees reimbursed on a dog case...on a car accident case you can't get attorney fees...didn't know that...

But I'm prepared...video...police report...vet deposition...you name it!

As for the carbs...boy is that ever going to be my downfall Geetey Girl! I'm starting out with 1 slice of wheat toast at breakfast and try that for one week to see what happens...then I'll add in berries and hold at that as long as the weight comes off...I'm just so glad to have more variety in my diet! I will add carrot shavings to my salads...but otherwise fairly low carb...

ONWARDS to get my dog back!!!!
Tara

 

[lmhall2000]

Well...all stress aside...I am very pumped about today's weigh in..I hated missing yesterday and had hot wings last night so I figured all the spicy stuff would hold some water..but I weighed in at 195!!! Only 36 pounds to go to the 150's!!!

I am adding in 1 piece of whole wheat toast today for breakfast..I'm out of all eggs/breakfast meats so really that's my only option...after I call the vet this morning I will hopefully pick up our baby Sable and figure out a way to get some groceries. I have nothing left in this house except pasta (which I've vowed not to eat for 100 days) frozen broccoli and a block of cheese...the kids have enough cereal for today but that's it! Oh, I think there's a bag of dried beans.

ONWARDS & DOWNWARD GANG!!! I hope my journey inspires others who have taken some time off and need to get back to it...the first week is always hard, the second week is pretty okay..the third week is the clincher for me...if I can stay good through that week I'm well set up for the remainder of the weeks...

ONE WEEK GONE!!! TWENTY SOMETHING LEFT!!!
Tara

 

[lmhall2000]

First day on non-low-low carb....I added one whole wheat piece of toast and a small bag of sunflower seeds that came with my grilled chicken salad from Chick-Fil-A....ahhhh my body says "THANK YOU!" Let's hope the scales do, too!

Tara