For those who have lost someone close to them....

[LisaNJ25]

I was just thinking of my grandfather tonight. It was 9 years ago on March 20th that he died. I was looking at a picture of him that my mom has on her fireplace mantle. Its of him and my younger sis and my older son on on his lap. I was thinking how I wish he had the chance to met my younger 3 kids and I wonder if he knows I named one after him. Ok ok now I am tearing up already. It doesnt take much when I think about him.

 

[ImarriedGrumpy]

My mom died suddenly from a head injury in 1999, and I still miss her. I don't know that the pain of the grief really has gone away so much as I've gotten used to it and grown in my strength to bear it. I can laugh again, and rejoice and celebrate and yes, even have moments where I forget the grief, but I will always mourn the loss of this wonderful woman in my life. I've found small ways to celebrate her life and honor her in my daily life and for big events.

My mom loved frogs and collected all kinds of frog figurines, clothing, mugs, note pads, etc. I make sure that there is at least one frog in each room of my house, and I have a little stuffed frog toy that I take with me on big trips. Mom died before she got to take her "dream WDW trip" and stay at WL, so last year (after 5 years of saving) I went on that trip with DH and a good friend of mine who knew and loved my mom, too. We went to all her favorite attractions first, and each day I wrote a postcard to her that I added to my "mom journal" where I record my thoughts and questions for her.

For our wedding, I had a photo of my mom from her wedding enlarged and framed that I placed on the alter in the front of the church. Next to it was a beautiful boquet of flowers, and three candles - one for myself and each of my siblings. After the ushers had seated the parents, my brother and sister each went forward and lit one of the candles. After the processional and opening prayer, I went up and lit the remaining candle. I also carried a white orchid in my boquet because those were my mom's favorite flowers and the last gift I gave her was a white orchid plant.

Sorry this got so long - I just miss her, and I still like to talk about her and all she has meant to me. It feels both painfully sad and healingly good to do little things that remind me of her!

 

[2Princes2Princesses]

My father died suddenly when I was 23, about 10 1/2 years ago. He was probably my best friend, and my oldest DD's.

It still catches me with a twinge...I will tear up at one thing or another. Sometimes when I am going through a rough time or having trouble with a decision that I would have asked him about, I will see something on TV or hear a song that reminds me of him, and somehow it helps.

I can talk to the kids about him without crying now, and smile more than I cry when I think of him. It still stings, but not as acutely as it did the first year or so.

The hardest things for me were when my 2 youngest were born, and my 2-year-old DD would have been the light of his life. She is a teeny powerhouse full of attitude. He would have LOVED it.

He had a huge great Dane named Blue, who died a month to the day before he did. Oddly enough, they had the same heart condition and were on the same meds for it. And he was about 6'2" and weighed over 300 pounds. Anyway, my 2 yr old DD talks about her friend "Ghost." She told my 13-yr old that he is a big man with a REALLY big dark gray dog and he comes to see her and keep her safe.

<insert twilight zone tunes here>

My 13-yr old asked her if his name was Bill. My 2 yr old sighed, looked at her with this withering look and said "NO Courtney...his name is GHOST"

 

[Brad&Kryssi]

I am crying my eyes out reading this thread but thanking God at the same time that it's here.

I am so sorry for all of your losses. My daughter Taryn was killed almost 3 years ago in a car accident...she was 17. She was my angel and my princess and we just finished the last of the court cases involving her death so I'm finally facing that she is really gone.

I'm planning my WDW wedding in November of this year with a Cinderella theme in tribute to my princess who will never have one. As my something blue, I will be wearing her birthstone necklace to keep her close to my heart.

Hold fast to your loved ones and make each day count. My thoughts and prayers are with you all.

 

[rparmfamily]

Oh goodness, all of you who have lost a child. (((hugs and prayers))) I can not imagine the pain. So unfair, and I am so very very sorry. No one should ever have to experience that kind of loss.



I lost my father nearly 3 years ago. He was young, in his 50's and seemingly a healthy man. He just didn't know he had stage 4 cancer. I miss him daily, and still find myself overwhelmed with the pain/anxiety of the loss at times. My throat closes up, I can't breath and my eyes swell. Certain songs do that, or sometimes I think to myself "I'll have to ask Dad..." and remember that I can't. I also lost both grandmothers within the same 3 months.

It does get better, I don't have the hole-in-my-heart feeling everyday now. I actively and openly talk about him to my family and my children, so that they may "know" him too. Really, it's the only think I can do.

 

[ClarabelleCowFan]

Thursday marks the 1 year anniversary of my first love and college sweetheart. Eddie was killed in the line of duty in Afghanistan. He was so young and had 2 beautiful children. The high school here that he graduated from is having a memorial service on May 4th and hopes to collect enough in donations for a plaque at the school, a tree to plant on school grounds in his honor and a scholarship fund.

I can't watch any war movies and even tear up when I see an American flag since it reminds me of the one draped over his casket.

I want to drive over to the beach where we used to go sometime this week and just sit and remember him. He was a wonderful guy - so funny and sweet and just adorable and a brave Army Ranger. I will always miss him.

 

[Brad&Kryssi]

I actively and openly talk about him to my family and my children, so that they may "know" him too. Really, it's the only think I can do.

I agree wholeheartedly. I still say "my girls" or "my daughters". When people ask how many children I have, I still say two. And I believe it to be true. I do have two daughters...one's just not with me physically...she's with me in spirit.

 

[mrsltg]

I agree wholeheartedly. I still say "my girls" or "my daughters". When people ask how many children I have, I still say two. And I believe it to be true. I do have two daughters...one's just not with me physically...she's with me in spirit.

Absolutely! My son needs me to live on. If I stop mentioning him, or if I stop counting him, it's as though he didn't exist. I refuse to wipe him away. I have three children. Two girls and one boy. When people ask how old they are I simply say "dd is 5, dd is 10 months, and ds has passed away."

 

[DisneyMim]

My husband lost his brother in a horrific car accident over 20 years ago. I don't think you ever get over it. Sometimes something will spark a memory, and at times my husband will tell a story about him, but for the longest time he wouldn't even talk about him. I couldn't take out our wedding album for years (he was the best man). My MIL never got over it, I believe it's what caused her "down" spiral. I miss my MIL and FIL too. I think in time you can think about people who you have lost, but it takes awhile because the pain is just so overwhelming. God Bless the OP and everyone who has lost someone way too soon.

 

[Brad&Kryssi]

Absolutely! My son needs me to live on. If I stop mentioning him, or if I stop counting him, it's as though he didn't exist. I refuse to wipe him away. I have three children. Two girls and one boy. When people ask how old they are I simply say "dd is 5, dd is 10 months, and ds has passed away."

Erin, I'm so sorry for your loss...I definitely feel your pain. I speak about Taryn like she's still alive so often too. It make people uncomfortable sometimes and I end up comforting them!

I think it makes us stronger for having gone through it and being able to talk about it. Thank God we are surrounded with people who allow us to do just that.

This past January and February were my first two trips to Disney and I saw her everywhere! So many little girls who looked like her and instead of crying, I had to smile...she's not really gone, she's just somewhere else.

 

[luvwinnie]

This is so funny that i can to this thread tonight. i wasnt even going to get on the computer tonight.

i have been thinking about my family for the pass 2 days non stop and tonight i have and still am crying so hard.

I lost both of my sisters when i was 17 (1997), my only grandmother when i was 18 (1998), my mom when i was 19 (1999), and my dad when i was 20 (2000) and my aunt when i was 20 (2000).

I miss them all so much!!! and i always wonder why I couldnt have a family for longer.

I just want to send you a hug.

 

[luvwinnie]

That exactly describes the feeling I get sometimes when i think about my dad. He died of lung cancer 8 years ago. Most of the time I go along just fine, and then, all of a sudden out of nowhere, it's like a freight train hits me and I have to stop and get my bearings for a moment because none of it seems real.

I've only really cried for my daddy once. (Not that I don't miss him every day. It's just that I'm NOT one to cry. I didn't even cry at the funeral. I have a hard time letting go of my emotions like that, a trait I inherited from him, by the way.) But, my father had been dead 5 years when my son was born. That night, when I was lying there in my hospital bed and my 1lb 7oz baby was down the hall in the NICU fighting for every breath, and the nurses were updating us every 30 minutes to let us know if he was even still alive - I cried and cried for my daddy. There I was a 31 year old woman, and all I could think in that sick, miserable, terrified state was, "I want my daddy."

I know those moments. Hugs to you.

 

[Microcell]

It is almost 18 years later and I get those moments every few weeks. I just think my mom would have loved to be a grandma, and she never got the chance. It is probably for the best, because I was a mamma's girl and I am sure with her controlling nature, it would have caused marital strife. I would love just one day with my mom and my kids.

 

[Brad&Kryssi]

It is almost 18 years later and I get those moments every few weeks. I just think my mom would have loved to be a grandma, and she never got the chance. It is probably for the best, because I was a mamma's girl and I am sure with her controlling nature, it would have caused marital strife. I would love just one day with my mom and my kids.

I can't imagine what you're going through being without your mom. It has to be even harder when you're a mom yourself. Hugs to you.

 

[phisigprincess]

Yeah. i'll find myself randomly (and I do mean randomly) just cry a little for my Grandma. I guess some times it just hits you. Many hugs to everyone.

 

[Andrea]

I just want to send you a hug.

thank you i am going to go visit them all sometime today

 

[MickeysMommy]

to everyone.

Today is 7 weeks that my Daddy passed. Thursdays kill me. I took for granted that he would always be here. I never even thought of a day that he wouldn't - even when he was sick. It never occurred to me that one day he might not be here. I talk to him. I hope he is around me and I hope he can hear me when I talk. I miss him so much. Sometimes it's like the pain is so unbearable that I feel like I can't breathe. But, then, somehow, I do.

again, to everyone.

 

[CJK]

Hugs to you. I know exactly how you feel. When my dear grandfather died in 2001, I was completely heartbroken. I found that waking up each morning was terrible because I momentarily forgot that he was gone, but then I'd remember and feel that raw pain all over again.

The good news is that those raw feelings of pain do fade. You'll never forget your loved one, but it does get easier. I still feel sad when I think about my grandfather and how our special talks will never happen again, but I can now also smile at some of our wonderful memories.

Be kind to yourself during this time. I hope that you too will smile at the memories in the future. *hugs*