For those who are single, are you ever frustrated that you haven’t found the one yet?

[disykat]

I got married at 29 after a lot of "dry spells" in dating between college and when I met my husband. The best advice I ever got was "if you like them as a person, don't immediately friend zone them. Give them 3 chances to see if attraction develops." I almost didn't go on date number 3 with DH because I didn't want to lead him on. We've been married over 30 years.

As for faking religious beliefs, that's a giant NOOOO! It's one thing telling someone you're willing or interested in being part of religious gatherings, but don't really have a deep personal belief. However, straight out lying for the "benefits" is terrible.

 

[RamblingMad]

As for faking religious beliefs, that's a giant NOOOO! It's one thing telling someone you're willing or interested in being part of religious gatherings, but don't really have a deep personal belief. However, straight out lying for the "benefits" is terrible.

There are no benefits if they're not faking too.

 

[mrodgers]

Sorry, it really is a particularly heart breaking kind of alone feeling, to be alone in a relationship.

I don't recognize your name, but some others may remember me saying stuff like this before..

What's funny is, we are best of friends now. We do just about everything together with the kids. That isn't quite as unusual, but we also hike together, go out to eat without the kids together, we shop together, we get together if there's a movie to watch on TV or there's a few shows we get together to watch like You on Netflix, and we were watching Dead to Me also. We travel places together, like the old time craft show festivals kind of thing. Kids never want to go to those things any more so we go together. We spent a week at Myrtle Beach with our youngest. She took me to a hockey game in April and we spent the night in the city to check out the city since that's a huge deal to her. I married then divorced the farmer's daughter.

I was living at my mother's when I was getting divorced and took her to church on Sundays. It thrilled her. Also one sermon on forgiveness by the Pastor completely changed the relationship my ex and I had and that was during the divorce process when things were very very bad.

And no, I do get it from all the guys at work, it is not a romantic relationship and we are not getting remarried. We both know neither could live with the other. We now enjoy each other's company when we do things, kids or no kids (who are now both college with one half living at home at mom's and half living with her boyfriend and the other going away for college next week as a freshman. Neither of us have any thoughts of getting into a relationship with anyone.

 

[MrsCobraBubbles]

I don't recognize your name, but some others may remember me saying stuff like this before..

What's funny is, we are best of friends now. We do just about everything together with the kids. That isn't quite as unusual, but we also hike together, go out to eat without the kids together, we shop together, we get together if there's a movie to watch on TV or there's a few shows we get together to watch like You on Netflix, and we were watching Dead to Me also. We travel places together, like the old time craft show festivals kind of thing. Kids never want to go to those things any more so we go together. We spent a week at Myrtle Beach with our youngest. She took me to a hockey game in April and we spent the night in the city to check out the city since that's a huge deal to her. I married then divorced the farmer's daughter.

I was living at my mother's when I was getting divorced and took her to church on Sundays. It thrilled her. Also one sermon on forgiveness by the Pastor completely changed the relationship my ex and I had and that was during the divorce process when things were very very bad.

And no, I do get it from all the guys at work, it is not a romantic relationship and we are not getting remarried. We both know neither could live with the other. We now enjoy each other's company when we do things, kids or no kids (who are now both college with one half living at home at mom's and half living with her boyfriend and the other going away for college next week as a freshman. Neither of us have any thoughts of getting into a relationship with anyone.

That sounds like a very healthy coparenting relationship. Not possible in my situation because my ex was abusive and when I started standing up to his abuse he beat our son, that's why we left. I'm very happy my ex has no interest in parenting. And I agree that forgiveness is a good thing, but I will absolutely never forgive him for what he did--I can let go of his abuse of me but if I die before my ex-husband I hope I am able to come back and haunt him for what he did to my son. He faced no legal repercussions because we were too scared of him to file for a PFA.

Like I said in my post, definitely not actively looking but I can't help feeling sad and guilty that my kids grew up without a male figure in their lives. My son doesn't get emotional often, but the few times he has cried to me were about his dad, he was sad that he had no one to teach him to shave or to tie a tie, etc. To be clear, he wasnt actually missing his dad, just missing the things that dads do, the father/son experiences. I made it work because that's what single parents do--we watched youtube tutorials for the shaving and my best friend's husband tied my son's tie for his high school graduation--but I'm still so sad for the things my kids missed out on by not having a decent father figure. It sounds like your kids got to have both parents though and that is amazing that you and your ex were able to work that out! A lot of divorced people can't do that.

 

[kaismommie]

I wouldn’t say I’m frustrated. Maybe annoyed and yes it bothers me sometimes, but I can’t it’s how my life currently is and has been for 6 years. All I can hope is that one day I’ll find my match.