Feeling discriminated against... :(

Discussion in 'Disney for Adults and Solo Travelers' started by TripleB909, Mar 12, 2017.

  1. StageTek

    StageTek It's kind of fun to do the impossible.

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    I miss this, too. There was a time when I could talk to people while in line.
    Even in the single riders lines most people immediately pull out their phones
    to avoid any contact.
     
  2. goofyernmost

    goofyernmost Aged to Perfection

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    I am sure it will all go well for you. Remember that if you want to be alone you can be, but many times if you want to talk with people all you really have to do is be the initiator. Your choice! That is what is good about traveling solo. Everything is your choice, what you ride, how many times you ride it, when you get there when you leave, where and what you eat, all that is your choice. If you want to just sit there and have a Mickey Bar or if you want to ride Spaceship Earth over and over again or the People Mover for that matter. All your choice. There are times, but, for me, very few where I think to myself... gee, it would have been nice to share that with someone, but, that feeling quickly passes.

    A lot of it is how you condition yourself to see things. For example, let's say you want to ride Winnie the Pooh. You are a grownup and the ride is more tilted toward a young person. You stand in line and start to feel self-conscious about it. You know why, being a grown up alone in a ride designed for a kid. Here's what I do, and it is more of a personal mind game. I stand in the line. I don't know the people in front of me and I don't know the people behind me. Here's the catch, they don't know either. Those in front think that I am with the group behind them and the group behind me think that I am with the group ahead. I just don't tell them any different. When I get up to where I will be boarding the ride, the CM will ask, how many. I tell them one, please and they direct me to a spot to board. At that point the group in front is occupied and concentrating on getting ready to get on the ride, the group behind is doing the same or waiting for the next turn and almost no one knows I was by myself. After the ride, who cares. Believe me with all the sensory stuff going on at WDW, no one is paying attention to little old me and they won't be concerned about you either. So no need to feel even a little self-conscious.
     
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  4. DisneyMemee

    DisneyMemee Superwoman (Aren't we all?)

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    This is great...thank you so much! Next week at this time I will be on the plane!!!:thanks:
     
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  5. Sweettears

    Sweettears 50 years of Disney and counting

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    This is exactly what I do.
     
  6. ars0525

    ars0525 DIS Veteran

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    I have been put with others on RnR, Test Track, EE & BTM depending on the time of day & crowd level. And usually it's another solo adult or the adult in the group of 3 I am paired with if it happens. Generally I ride the 2 seater rides solo though.

    Never on a "dark" ride like Toy Story or Haunted Mansion or Peter Pan am I paired up. Even on POC sometimes little me gets my very own row in the boat. :rotfl2: Honestly from a safety stand point for everyone (even though I know there are cameras everywhere!) I don't want to be seated with a minor on those types of rides nor do I want some random adult seated with me (those are long rides in the dark). So I understand why the CM's seat people that way.
     
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  7. goofyernmost

    goofyernmost Aged to Perfection

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    Waiting for an update... how did it go?
     
  8. DisneyMemee

    DisneyMemee Superwoman (Aren't we all?)

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    Thank you so much for asking...it went absolutely great! I was not in the least bit self conscious. I went to the Epcot F&G festival, took lots of photos, rode Spaceship Earth, hit some of the outdoor kitchens (onion tart in France, yum!), and even ate at the Rose and Crown. I had a fabulous server--I wish I remembered her name--and really enjoyed it. I also went to Disney Springs and had a fun day there. AND, lots of pool time. I would definitely do it again! I also met a woman on her way to MK, in an ECV, traveling alone!, celebrating her 75th. That's my kind of woman! :lovestruc
     
  9. jsmla

    jsmla DIS Veteran

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    Just from experience I do feel like men (especially solo guys) are treated a bit differently. I (57 grandmotherly type) see a little girl outfitted up in the best that the Bibbidi Boppidi Boutique has to offer and can go on and on about how sweet, so cute, "Where's Pascal, Rapunzel?" and the parents are perfectly fine with it. (In the Peter Pan line they can be downright thrilled.) If DH so much as glances little Rapunzel's way the parents will pull their child close and give DH the stank eye.
     
  10. Chuckers

    Chuckers Missing my day trips to Disneyland :(

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    Yes, we single men are all child abductors.. I was sat next to a young boy on California Screamin' and *I* felt uncomfortable because of how it looked to everyone else.
     
  11. LadyDiznee123

    LadyDiznee123 DIS Veteran

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    I so agree aVASTgrl. If anything, I think I got the royal treatment when CM's and even other guests see me alone. Not once have I ever noticed a CM treat me in a manner that would embarrass me. Another aspect for me is that I am an introvert by nature. Very comfortable being alone with myself, and very happy at WDW. I think my happiness explodes upon people when they see me. I think they can see how happy I am. I'm sure I'm wearing a huge grin, and not afraid to engage CM's or strangers in line. And with me having a DARK complexion - I know I stand out. And only ONCE did I feel self-conscious on my own and that was on the TEACUPS. Just felt VERY lonely for me and I did it twice because it's a favorite for me. But next time, even though it's a favorite - I'm going to skip it. That ride just cries out to be companionized.. not really fun without it.
    My favorite experience was getting on TEST TRACK in the early evening hours four times back to back via single rider line. Loved it! lol,
     
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  12. LadyDiznee123

    LadyDiznee123 DIS Veteran

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    Love your answer Chuckers.
     
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  13. LadyDiznee123

    LadyDiznee123 DIS Veteran

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    Lol. Glad you are feeling better. I think CHUCKERS gave you a great answer (but others as well of course).
    I will say DISNEY has a demographic. Whether it is groups or "family" (ANY FAMILY... Black, White, Asian, etc), then twosomes (no matter the race, be they mom and teen daughter, mom and teen son, adult father and son, two teens... doesn't matter). And then us CRAZY soloists. I too am Black and dark-skinned - so I know that I stand out, and yet I think they (CM's and guests that I meet) love me because I think that my smile and enthusiasm is contagious. I am Disney "stupid" and it shows. While I am still a reserved and introverted spirit, I can be found smiling all the time at Disney and I believe the smile and my spirit must be inviting to others. If anything, it seems to me that I get the ROYAL TREATMENT. I love it.
    PixieDusted left and right!

    Anyway, a lone, tall Black guy doesn't fit the demographic that they expect (as opposed to tall black guy with his kids, or two lone, tall black guys,... you catch my drift???) - and so indeed it may NOT be all in your mind. But at the same time it is indeed still incumbent upon you to suck it up and continue to enjoy! The short, lone Black lady like me doesn't really raise much of a brow.

    So, I guess I can only add to what others have said... ENJOY and BE COMFORTABLE with yourself! Don't let those few bad experiences foil your solo stays. The ONLY thing that gets me is doing the TEACUPS alone. That ride cries out for companionship. I am going from NOV 2ND to NOV 7TH or Nov 8th. If you're coming during that time... let's make a date for the TEACUPS and I'll stand in line with you for PLUTO!!!

    Thanks for being brave enough to post! :flower:
     
    Last edited: May 6, 2017
  14. Chuckers

    Chuckers Missing my day trips to Disneyland :(

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    Thank you :)
     
  15. Carolyn Louise

    Carolyn Louise Mouseketeer

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    When I went solo for my birthday everyone was super sweet and nice to me. The cast members were so friendly and a couple at the bar in bluezoo made sure I got a free dessert! Btw I stayed at AKL too. Have a blast!
     
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  16. North of Mouse

    North of Mouse DIS Veteran

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    It's also couples that can get looks and strange remarks! Dh & I hear a lot of "you mean you go to Disney without kids or g'kids"??? We are seniors, but we say "Yep, we 'are' the kids"!!!! Just got back from a 10 night great trip!
     
  17. Chuckers

    Chuckers Missing my day trips to Disneyland :(

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    Are you staying onsite? If so, make sure you tell your reservation agent that you're celebrating your birthday. I did that for my sister and every dinner reservation we had, they brought out a birthday dessert. We also stayed at the Grand Floridian (concierge level) and they had a big chocolate Mickey in the room for her birthday.
     
  18. AuntieBean

    AuntieBean ChEAR Squad

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    Single rider lines are my favorite! I just got back from Disneyland and only had to wait 45 min to ride Radiators Springs as opposed to the 105 minute regular line. I also really enjoyed wandering around Cars Land at night by myself ..it somehow managed to be peaceful even with so many people around
     

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  19. DisneyFan2013

    DisneyFan2013 DIS Veteran

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    Yes, I'm sure it can be a bit awkward for male solos at Disney. I also think that some people would find it hard to believe that some adults who love Disney really have no interest in children period. Sure, some of them are cute, but I definitely don't make it a point to talk to anyone's children. I'm not there for the kids! I've gone solo three times, had a blast, and I plan to take more solo trips in the future.
     
  20. jsmla

    jsmla DIS Veteran

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    I understand how those parents feel but it's a shame things are like this. DH and I seriously need some grandchildren-we both love children and fawn all over our friends' grandkids. He's going to be the best Grandpa ever!
     
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  21. StageTek

    StageTek It's kind of fun to do the impossible.

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    It IS a shame.
     
    Last edited: May 18, 2017

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