Feeling discriminated against... :(

[TripleB909]

I am new member of disboards and I am huge Disney World fan and I mainly go for the characters like Goofy, Donald, Mickey Ect. but I recently just came back from a week vacation at Disney World, I am a sliver passholder, and I felt like I was being judged everywhere I went from seeing Pluto at Hollywood Studios to seeing Goofy and even getting on the rides was horrible because it was like no one wanted to sit next to me. Just because a tall black guy wants to get his picture taken with Goofy doesn't mean I am a freak. I always travel solo and I love it but sometimes I hate it because I have to say only 1 when I meet a character or get on a ride and always get strange looks. I'm there like everyone else there, to have a good time and not worry about reality for a few hours. I was dancing with Pluto at Hollywood Studios to the kiddy tune that was playing and cast members were talking among themselves looking at me and strange looks come again. Some cast members were wonderful and even remembered my name but the rest I wanted to tell off and sometimes my character interactions were short and rushed. I go there because I feel happy and the hugs and it's very comforting. I don't care about the other families wanting a turn because I'm not there for them, I'm there for me. I'm just sick of it and making regret ever buying this pass because if i can't be myself there...I'll just go else where, where I feel accepted and not left out.

 

[goofyernmost]

I guess that I have to say that I have been discriminated against too. Happily, I never thought about it like that until you mentioned it. I always travel there solo. My wife is gone, my kids are grown, and I with a smile on my face tell them that it is just (1) when they ask me how many. I don't think it has anything to do with being a tall black guy as I am a short fat white guy and I don't see anyone knocking down barriers to have the honor of riding with me either. I like it that way. More elbow room.

That last statement puzzles me. Left out of what? You are in the park, you are riding rides, you are getting your picture taken with characters. What's missing. Do you really expect that people that you don't even know would be doing anything other then trying to keep their own family together and not really thinking about you at all? Whether you ride alone or not really has nothing to do with choice. The CM places you and if the crowd is heavy you will indeed be paired with someone if there is another single available to ride at the time. If not they will let you have your space and keep the others together as much as they can. You get your visitation on in the queue line, that's where I do it. I chat, talk about the day, the ride, the experience and go about riding. If there is room and the numbers work out many times someone will be sitting with me, if not I ride alone and never once thought that it should be any different then that. I believe the strange looks are all in the imagination.

 

[DaisyDuck001]

Sorry to hear that you were disappointed with your experiences. But I do believe it is one of the great secrets of life that the more comfortable you are with yourself, the more comfortable others will be around you. Many people develop this ability as they get older, so hang in there.

I relate to the experience of waiting in line to meet characters and then being rushed through as a solo (adult female in my case), even though I waited my turn in line like everyone else, and waited as families or kids received much longer interactions. But the cast members may not realize that you want a longer interaction or more pictures with the characters, unless you tell them. So now when this is the case, I may say something like, "I really like Character X. Would you please take a whole bunch of pictures?" I don't always end up with as much time as I want, but letting them know what I'm looking for, helps in most instances.

 

[Euby]

I'm sorry to hear that you had this experience. I'm doing a solo trip for my birthday. I'm sure I'll get the "double-whammy" from a few CMs and other guests. "You mean you are at Disney by yourself on your BIRTHDAY?!"

To which my reply will be, "Yep, isn't that cool?!"

One of my favorite quotes is from Eleanor Roosevelt - "No one can make you feel inferior without your consent."

 

[BrianL]

I am happy to say that I have not had this experience, at least not from CMs. Maybe some other guests thought it was weird, but most people are fine with it. We are all Disney people here and we will welcome you with open arms. Maybe you can even find some travelling companions.

Also, have you ever tried Disneyland? I think it's more common to be solo over there as a lot of locals will just drop in for a few hours. The people are also Disneyland people and they totally get it. I have found it's a tad more solo friendly, not that WDW hasn't been in my experience. WDW gets more of that once-in-a-lifetime family visitor though, where DL gets a lot of hardcore fans.

 

[Shock13]

TripleB909, I'm sorry those things happened. I've done WDW solo and it does take some getting used to I'm a self-conscious person so that doesn't help at all but it's either do Disney and deal or not go at all. Overall I had a great time and would definitely do solo again. However one situation still sticks in my mind of when I went to eat at Sci-Fi Dine In. When the hostess called my name I went up to her and she looked around and asked "where is the rest of your party?". The lobby was full of people and unfortunately I got embarrassed when I told her it was just me. She then looked at her ticket and said she didn't even check the party size. Yeah, not cool.

I agree with BrianL! I've done DLR a few times solo and love it! Nothing against WDW but I found the CM's and the guests at DLR to be more friendly and outgoing.

 

[Mackenzie Click-Mickelson]

TripleB909, I'm sorry those things happened. I've done WDW solo and it does take some getting used to I'm a self-conscious person so that doesn't help at all but it's either do Disney and deal or not go at all. Overall I had a great time and would definitely do solo again. However one situation still sticks in my mind of when I went to eat at Sci-Fi Dine In. When the hostess called my name I went up to her and she looked around and asked "where is the rest of your party?". The lobby was full of people and unfortunately I got embarrassed when I told her it was just me. She then looked at her ticket and said she didn't even check the party size. Yeah, not cool.

I agree with BrianL! I've done DLR a few times solo and love it! Nothing against WDW but I found the CM's and the guests at DLR to be more friendly and outgoing.

Just honest curiosity do they have the number of people for your party listed next to your name? I know when you are making reservations you have to list how many will be in your party.

 

[Sweettears]

I just got back from a 5 day solo trip. I don't believe that I was ever asked how many when I had an ADR. So my guess is that the system shows the number at check in.

 

[Mackenzie Click-Mickelson]

I just got back from a 5 day solo trip. I don't believe that I was ever asked how many when I had an ADR. So my guess is that the system shows the number at check in.

Well that's sorta what I was wondering. If it showed the number then it was a hostess who wasn't paying attention and was assuming (which isn't good) that there were more guests. Either way I get how the other poster was feeling was just curious about the number in your party part.

 

[Shock13]

Well that's sorta what I was wondering. If it showed the number then it was a hostess who wasn't paying attention and was assuming (which isn't good) that there were more guests. Either way I get how the other poster was feeling was just curious about the number in your party part.

The CM who called my name to seat me was the one who wasn't paying attention. She had some ticket with her and glanced down at it and sort of chuckled and made the remark about not paying close attention to the number in my party.

 

[Mackenzie Click-Mickelson]

The CM who called my name to seat me was the one who wasn't paying attention. She had some ticket with her and glanced down at it and sort of chuckled and made the remark about not paying close attention to the number in my party.

Ah ok I gotcha

 

[DaisyDuck001]

However one situation still sticks in my mind of when I went to eat at Sci-Fi Dine In. When the hostess called my name I went up to her and she looked around and asked "where is the rest of your party?". The lobby was full of people and unfortunately I got embarrassed when I told her it was just me. She then looked at her ticket and said she didn't even check the party size. Yeah, not cool.

If this had happened on one of my first solo trips, I would have found it awkward, but now, I'd probably just say, "That's all there is. There ain't no more." Like anything, being solo gets easier with practice.

 

[Pooh2]

As a middle-aged couple traveling without kids, we've been rushed through character experiences as well. That's okay with us, I enjoy the photos for our photobook of the trip.

Once in awhile, we get great character interaction and I take that as a cherrry on top! (Our one trip to Disneyland, it was consistently wonderful!)

Over the years, we've experienced lots of CMs who were not particularly disney-like at WDW. Disneyland and Disney Cruise line were pretty fantastic!

 

[adisneyaunt]

Sorry OP!
Don't let others Influence ur having a good time... enjoy what u like on your terms. If I were there I'd have been happy to share a ride.
I hope it won't deter you from doing ur next visit!
Enjoy!!!

 

[Sweettears]

Sorry OP!
Don't let others Influence ur having a good time... enjoy what u like on your terms. If I were there I'd have been happy to share a ride.
I hope it won't deter you from doing ur next visit!
Enjoy!!!

I only was "forced" to share a ride once and that was 7DMT. I did ride with others as a single rider. I was never made to feel uncomfortable. OP I would just chalk it up to a one off experience and wouldn't let effect future solo trips.

 

[RealBlast3]

I'll be going on my 6th solo trip this May, and I have experienced some things that made me feel bad. However, I agree that it's up to you to be strong and like that Eleanor Roosevelt quote says that Euby posted above, ""No one can make you feel inferior without your consent." I am going to remember that.

So yeah, I did have one trip in particular where I let it get to me all the times I got asked "How many?" and I got anxiety about saying "1". And it wasn't really anyone else's fault but mine.

The only thing I really, really don't like that cast members do, which is rude, though it may not be their intent, is when I go to restaurants, and it's usually signature ones that this happens at, they really, REALLY, try to push sitting at the bar to me. Like, do you really think I would have went to the trouble of making a dining reservation if I was the kind of bloke that wanted to just grab chow at the bar? To me, when they ask me if I want to sit at the bar, even they they wrap it up in the bow of "Oh, we thought you might enjoy the social experience of dining with other patrons and talking to the bartender!", to me, what I see is "Gee, we really rather not waste a whole table on a single diner, plus his meal and our tip is likely to be much less, so let's see if we can shuffle him off to the bar and make some more $$$". I mean, honestly, am I wrong here? Is it just my cynicism talking here? So, yeah, though I am used to it, and always ready with my response of "Oh, no I prefer a table, thank you.", it still irks me. And I'm sure all the hosts have been told to say that to solo diners, I know, but again, I'm convinced the reason is monetary and not to increase my dining pleasure.

One time, I had the embarrassment, at Jiko, after telling the host I wanted a table after she pushed the bar or the cooking place by the fire on me, she gave me to the waiter, who promptly escorted me right to the cooking place by the fire and I hated to have to tell him but I really didn't want to sit there and she had just asked me! So, I had to tell him, and I made a point of telling him how I just told the hostess I wanted a TABLE after she had just asked me, and I gave quite the look to show I was annoyed and I never do that, but I really was annoyed LOL. Anyway, I felt bad for the waiter, because he was very friendly and the hostess had made a big thing of introducing him to me, and once they moved me to a table, I ended up with a different waiter.

Anyway, one of my favorite things about Disney is the Dining experiences and I love sitting at a table - I don't want to socialize with people at the bar or other interactive areas at restaurants LOL. That's not for me. Plus, those bar stools are really uncomfortable and for me, that kind of meal doesn't feel like a real meal and is rushed. I like long meals, where I can take my time, and relax comfortably. I don't want a noisy and uncomfortable bar-stool that I can't wait to get off of. Bars are for drinking or maybe munching on a snack. Not for long meals, as far as I'm concerned. And while I understand some people might consider it an exclusive and cool thing to sit by the fire at Jiko and watch them prepare your meal, again, I have no interest in that, and get hot easily, so I really don't wanna be right on top of a fire! LOL I guess I'm kind of high maintenance.

And incidentally, even though I'm a solo diner, I can assure you they get a high priced meal out of me, with multiple apps, cocktails or wine and dessert. To be honest, most of my solo dinners likely out-cost most families of 4, which is why it's so ironic they wanna push me off to the bar for a quickie meal that would be far less lucrative for them.

Anyway, that's my main pet peeve about being a solo vacationer, the dining. But I am used to it now. And I get my table no matter what!

 

[aVASTGrl]

I relate to the experience of waiting in line to meet characters and then being rushed through as a solo (adult female in my case), even though I waited my turn in line like everyone else, and waited as families or kids received much longer interactions. But the cast members may not realize that you want a longer interaction or more pictures with the characters, unless you tell them. So now when this is the case, I may say something like, "I really like Character X. Would you please take a whole bunch of pictures?" I don't always end up with as much time as I want, but letting them know what I'm looking for, helps in most instances.

^This is actually a REALLY good tip! I don't particularly care about characters, but my sister does, and I'll definitely be utilizing this on our cruise.

I can't say I've ever felt discriminated against for being solo; maybe self-conscious every once in awhile, but that's on me. In fact, I've gotten a few perks from CM 's who thought it was awesome that I travel solo. I got a room upgrade at WL, brought straight to the front of the line at Star Tours, and that sweet, fireside table with the comfy leather armchairs at Raglan Road, where the waitresses proceeded to dote on me and come over for a chat whenever they passed by.

Over the course of my trips, I've found that most guests are so consumed with their own trips and families, they really and truly aren't paying attention to you, or how many people are in your party. And if they do, I promise 10 seconds later, they've already forgotten about you. Sometimes our own insecurities create these negative experiences.

 

[Elle23]

Over the course of my trips, I've found that most guests are so consumed with their own trips and families, they really and truly aren't paying attention to you, or how many people are in your party. And if they do, I promise 10 seconds later, they've already forgotten about you. Sometimes our own insecurities create these negative experiences.

This really is true. My kids and I agreed that we hardly noticed crowds at the parks because we were so immersed in the whole experience. Same goes with dining. I don't recall ever looking around and wondering about other guests. I was just glad we all got to be there enjoying the Disney experience!

And it's not just solo travelers and adults without kids who experience issues either. My 13 year old son was ignored by every single princess at Akershus. It was a little odd, honestly!

 

[BrianL]

I agree with BrianL! I've done DLR a few times solo and love it! Nothing against WDW but I found the CM's and the guests at DLR to be more friendly and outgoing.

I'd clarify this by saying they are more friendly to solo adults, I think, and I think its because there are a lot more of them there. The CMs at WDW are certainly friendly (in fact I generally think you get better service at WDW), but they can be at least slightly surprised by solo diners and such.

 

[spiceycat]

Sometimes it is like you describe - other times it is great - lots of times it my attitude - if I think others are looking - well they generally are not - they are rapped in their own lives and really could care less about you.

Now in lines yes I generally have to start the conversation - most people are willing to talk anyone especially (for some reason) families. Now some people will ignore you - but hey that is THEIR problem not yours. If you are friendly most people will include you - there have been times when I have been rude - because when the ride is over I walk away. Don't mean to hurt anyone - but not looking for any real friends in the parks. Just being friendly.

Some of the CM at WDW don't seem to understand that adults (solo) love WDW as much as they do. Actually love my solo trips better than with others. but still will ask others to go at times. (especially when DVC is paying for it)