Toodycat...I have had people, including family, tell me that I'm too strict or that I'm not letting them be kids for years. I get so blasted sick and tired of it and they don't seem to "get" that my kid has to function in the real NT world. The things they do are not acceptable in this society and it is my job to make sure they know how to handle it. I've explained to these people about the autism but they don't seem to really understand what I'm up against or what my kids are up against. Oh and KFK I want to cry all the time about this kind of stuff. I try to tell myself that I got these kids for a reason but sometimes I truly wonder if I'm the right person for them.
Brightsy...
I'm sorry you had the meltdown yesterday. I think they are so much worse in public. I hate them at home, but I REALLY hate them in public. I don't know how to not be embarassed when they act like that.
KFK...my mom is good about saying things to people who are rude. She lacks her filter when it comes to people like that. She has no problem telling someone off if they need it. I just get embarassed and run the other direction.
Well, since we are discussing meltdowns I'll tell you about the war in our little part of Schmolland. My two goons got into a fight on the school bus yesterday afternoon with each other. Although, it was encouraged by a NT boy on the bus who is just a little butthead, but it still wasn't acceptable. My youngest, with said encouragement, bit the oldest two times on the arm and brought blood to the surface. The elder, not to be outdone, grabbed his little bro and bit the top of his head and left a mark. I guess height was an advantage for the oldest. Their consequences for this included no scouts and no outside with their friends. Well, DS10 had already lost his ds privledges that morning because he was playing with it instead of eating breakfast.
He is already stressed about today's testing and he just blew up last night. He was mad about his consequences for the fighting and then when I reminded him he couldn't play with his DS he went through the roof. He was screaming that I hate him and I don't love him and that he hates me...blah blah blah. You know the drill. So I stayed super duper calm and sent him to his room since he wouldn't listen to reason. He came out after 3 minutes and started again. So i sent him back again. He came back out and said since I hated him he was running away. He opened the door and went outside. I told him to shut the door behind himself. He had no shoes on and I know how he is about his feet and the concrete or pavement would keep him in the yard so I wasn't concerned that he'd actually do it.
After 10minutes of him wandering around the front yard I called him in the house and he refused. Again with the i hate him/he hates me thing. So I calmly told him I would call the police if he refused to come in. This lasted about 5 minutes with me holding my cell waiting to hit the send button if need be. I had no qualms with calling the police because I can't fight him. Finally he came and kept it up. I stayed calme for the over an hour this kept up but I finally lost it and started screaming back at him that if he wanted to leave he could go, I'd find a new house for him, and he could go. I literally had him backed into a corner while I ranted...about 45 seconds worth of rant. And then I turned around and stomped off (my own KFK version of the 4 year old). He crawled under a table and hid for about 15 minutes and then came out of it he sweetest, most loving child you have ever seen. I felt bad for yelling but I had had enough of that and couldn't take another minute of it.
Geez that's a friggin novella there! Sorry about that. If you didn't read it all, it can be summed up this way...Schomalland was hell last night until mom got ugly.
I'll be back later, I have a question to ask of you other Schmollanders.
Daisy
I am the same way about him looking normal and people thinking its bad parenting. I hate that feeling. I was reading your post to my mom and she reminded me of the time she snapped at a NT idiot.
So we had to have a talk about the tests and how his routine will change for a few days and all the other things that go along with it. But after we got that out I understood why he had been under the playroom table all afternoon and why he was under the blanket while playing his DS. He was trying to deal with the stress. So I had to email the teachers and let them know that if he suddenly dives for cover in one of the cabinets or under his desk they'll know why! 
I hope I never get the chance to find out. There could be bloodshed! 
He also stopped trying to run away from it, and has learned not to take off when panic sets in. 
Ofcourse, I often say this little prayer to Him:
Heavenly Father, PLEASE don't trust me so much. Help me through today and forgive me for my ungrateful thoughts. Amen! 
