Does anyone else feel like this... For Women Only

[Mitla96]

We were lucky to go to the 2004 Olympics in Greece and it was an education to go to the Mediterrean beaches. It isn't just the size 3 women who are topless sunbathing there. There are young women, old women, women with ****s down to their knees . They aren't self conscious-they are there to swim and catch some rays. It was cool.

It is very disheartening to read people obsessing about trying to look like they looked when you were 21. I really think most people only glance at other people at the beach or a pool. IF you have kids, you better be watching THEM anyway!

I remember walking by the POR pool with a 45ish friend of mine, and her being disgusted that these 20 year old guys didn't notice us. I wasn't surprised...we're in our 40's~!

Are we as Americans so obsessed with youth that we expect to hold on to our youthful good looks, instead of being happy and confident in our more age appropriate looks?

Janet

 

[Mitla96]

I am a big girl and last summer I travelled to the world with the added pleasure of being bald from chemo from breast cancer. Not for one minute did I worry what people thought. I was just doggoned excited to be able to take the trip with my famiily. This summer we are going back and I will have the good fortune of a new head of hair, will still be a big girl but have lived another year to enjoy life. How lucky am I?

Jamounger!

I'm a BC survivor too! My DD and I decided to take a quick Disney trip, because this will be the first vacation I've taken in a year and a half where I wasn't having a surgery.

I just finished reconstruction and am glad to be looking good in a size 12 swimming suit. I still have my chemo curls.

It does change your perspective....

Janet

 

[tiggersmom2]

I am going to get flamed for this I'm sure, but I'm going to add to the comment I made on the first page.

My body is far from perfect, but I worked hard to stay a size 2, even though I'm 36 and had two kids. I prefer to wear bikinis (tasteful) and even though I am self-conscious about the way I look I know I'm not drawing any negative stares or attention because of the way I am dressed.

That being said, I have SERIOUS problems with overweight people wearing two piece bathing suits in public. I think you should all feel comfortable wearing swimsuits in public, swimming in public, and enjoying yourselves just the same as the slender people; however, I find that MOST overweight people wear bathing suits that are highly inappropriate. Not only do very few overweight people choose suits with skirts, but a HUGE percentage of them wear bikinis. How can you expect to NOT get stared at when you're wearing suits that show off a lot more of the fat than needs to be shown? I don't stare at overweight people just because they are wearing swimsuits, but I do stare at the ones in bikinis and wonder how/why they would choose to make us all look at that.

I also noticed a lot of people in this thread claiming that they were size 12s and 14s, but not fat. Sorry, but unless you are over 6 feet tall a size 12 is way too big to be wearing a two-piece suit or a skimpy one-piece suit.

I guess my point is this...
Most overweight people aren't stared at because they are overweight...they are stared at because they are overweight and dressing like they're a size 4.

For the love of god!!!! Is your user name formerly Pnelson?!!! I too am one of the "lovely" size 2s but I will tell you something....I don't even glance at an overweight person in a swimsuit.

I have NEVER seen a very large woman woman in a bikini at WDW but rather trying to hide in a bathing suit covered by a t-shirt. I think that is sad....no one should stress about how they look at WDW...I know that I don't give a crap. I think the most important thing is how we treat each other and what kind of person we are.....I bet you don't get that.

 

[Ladyhawke10]

Personally,
I think people who judge other people by their weight are not worth knowing. Not only it is a meaningless and shallow way of looking at others, it is also arbitrary--physical standards change in direct response to a given culture's marketplace. Therefore, those that are analytically untrained enough to be brainwashed by consumerism (key symptom is that nothing satisfies....) are going to be directly reflective of all the advertising they've bought (themselves) into. It's nothing admirable. People die nearly as much from trying to lose weight as being overweight. In fact, there's a lot of evidence that being mildly overweight is virtually harmless (unless you take into account psychological impact on teenage girls--which is major). Long story short--enjoy your life, and don't worry about people who worry about other peoples' weight--it's not particularly honorable.

I've been visiting Disney now for 18 years. Have always loved the pools and to swim. Well, I'm 44 now and not in my 26 year old body. I was a size 3 back then and it will suffice to say I'm not that any longer. I also have an illness that makes my body retain fluid. Face, hands, feet, armpits, etc. I

The problem is I still love the pools but I am too ashamed of my appearance to enjoy it anymore. Besides weight gain the fluid makes my top half look lopsided (don't really know how to articulate this), and I feel like people are looking at me.

DH ends up so angry at me for this. He says that it's my illness and he's absolutely right, but people don't know I have a medical disorder when they see me. I know DH loves me and a lot of it is he dosen't like to see me hurt, but I can't help how I feel.

Has anyone else ever had this problem and any advice on how to just deal with it. Last year we went to the quiet pool but it's not the same, I may be 44 but I do love the water slide.

 

[Quinn222]

Here's my take on it: When you areout at the pool are you looking at and judging all the other people there? I didn't think so. Neither is anyone else. And if there is some rude person there with nothing else to do but critique everyone else's appearance, more power to them. Go, have fun, and don't worry about it. If you're at POR the last weekend in April then by all means look for the chubby lady with the red hair and come sit by me!

 

[sweetinmaine]

WOW! Thanks to all of you! When I go to WDW this Wednesday I will certainly feel better about myself and not focus on my size. While I wrote an earlier post stating the formernyer wasn't being rude I now have my doubts. Maybe she wasn't being intentially rude but to those of us who are overweight and those that aren't, she isn't someone that I would want as a friend. Imagine having to be perfect in order to not be judged.

And now. ..maybe it's time we focus our energies on making everyone who visits WDW feel good!

 

[Vanryan]

Let me admit that I am an over 40 male. I know it said "Women Only" but ladies, c'mon. You are on vacation. WHO CARES, you will never see these people again anyway. Real men are not looking anyway, they are much too busy looking at their own wifes or, more likely chasing after their three kids. Those extra "baby pounds" are, and let me say this loudly, A BADGE OF HONOR. Finally, take a look back. Most of the men you think are looking at you are nothing to write home about anyway. (me included) My advice to you is wear what you feel comfortable in on vacation. Anyone who takes exception to what you are wearing can take a flying leap in the Living Seas for all I care. Have fun.

What a beautiful person you are!!!

 

[luv2nascar]

I was kinda feeling bad about it last summer. We were so busy we just kept not getting to the pool but one night prior to bed we went down. It was June and plenty hot at night. Something about going in the dark made it easier. No one bothered us or called me fatty. It was actually quite enjoyable.

 

[snowwite]

Your post made me think of Judge Judy. She has a book, Beauy Fades, Dumb is Forever. It cracked me up.

I always think I can lose weight but you cant make yourself into a nice person!

 

[jenrose66]

I know it can be hard to do; but I just wouldn't worry about it. I can say with all honesty that I don't care how people look. I think that everybody has their body insecurities (I was never a size 3 ); however, everyone is entitled to have a good time! If there are some people that will be rude, they are in the vast minority, and karma will come back to bite them. Enjoy yourself and go on the slides!

 

[Tinkerbelle32]

Thanks to you all for getting me to realize how silly I have been trying to lose that "5 more lbs.". I'm 153 lbs and 5 ft 9. I promise I'm going to stop obsessing(because that's what I do)about myself and just focus and being the great wife and mother that I am. I have so many things to be thankful for in my life! I now realize how ridiculous I have been. Tink

P.S. I'm sure my hubby will thank you all too!

 

[EEyorelover22]

DH said when he was around 22 that he would divorce me if I ever got "fat". The mind set of a 22 year old gym stud is amazing. I replied that he better not ever have hair loss or he could take a hike Someone got even with him as he's the one that gained nearly 40 pounds, not me and he didn't have any children I never noticed ladies...never. I can tell now that he's lost all of his weight, but at the time I didn't notice and I never loved him any less when that happened. The 40's really slow the metabolism and eating what I once did isn't possible anymore. It really stinks!! My mom always says too that gravity for all those years really pulls everything all out of shape. I like that one.

Go and have fun. Besides, you'll never see most of those people again

 

[snowwite]

No, I'm not mean...I'm honest. I agree that people of every size should be able to swim and be seen in public in bathing suits and they shouldn't feel self-conscious or out of place. My problem is with people who don't dress appropriately for their size. I have a decent body, but I don't wear short skirts, low-cut shirts, or tight clothing. The point is to not draw any attention to oneself. I wear two-piece suits (and NOT skimpy ones) because I appear very flat in a one-piece. The suits I wear are fine for my age and I don't look like a teeny-bopper wannabe. I don't wear slutty clothing because it isn't appropriate or flattering...and overweight people shouldn't wear bikinis because it isn't flattering. That's my only point. If you are overweight and don't want to be stared at, then dress appropriately for your size. It's as simple as that.

There is a BIG difference between being honest and being hurtful.You said what you think and we cannot change your thought process.Your words are very hurtful to a lot of people.Many of us are not the size we were when we were younger and some of us were NEVER skinny.Some of your comments make people feel bad and that is not O.K. at all. You need to try to think about how you are affecting others before you are so honest.The fact that you feel qualified to pass judgement on the rest of us and justify saying hurtful things by saying you are being HONEST meakes you MEAN in my opinion.I would like to believe that there are more good people than bad and that most people would not judge a person based on appearance so if everyone has misunderstood your words then please say you are sorry.It takes courage for us big girls to wear a bathing suit in public. Everyone else was being supportive of the OP and each other.Why try to tear people down?

 

[Hef4545]

I'm fat and tall....6ft so no way of being inconspicuous. Had a ruff time growing up but at some point you have to decide to not worry about what people think. (took me 40 years) How many of them will you see again? Do you really want to measure your happiness by what a stranger thinks of you? You have your honeybun sitting there trying to make you happy by going to the quiet pool. He sounds like a good man and you are a lucky gal! Stop being self concious. I know it isn't easy.

I buy a comfortable bathing suit so if I go down the slides, everything stays put. There was also a tip on these boards to buy a pair of Men's bathing suit trunks to wear with your suit. Gives you a little more coverage. Wear a pretty t shirt if you need to. Do whatever makes you comfortable. You are on vacation. No rules! As soon as you get to the pool, don't hide in the chair..head to the slide.

As you can see from these posts, you are not alone! You can do it!

 

[deedeed]

Hi,
I am one who used to wear a shirt over my body when I was younger. I guess to hide myself. I have now had 2 kids and I put on that swim suit and I wear it proudly. I am 34 and a size 12! I do not want my kids to get in the mindset that to be fun or attractive you have to be a size 6. Go out and have fun in whatever you want to wear.
If others have a problem with what you look like, well that is just there problem! Be proud of who YOU are and enjoy yourself!

 

[ADisneygirl]

I just want to say that when I am on vacation I never sit and look/judge other people at the pool. What a waste of time! I want the OP to know that me, my friends and family included, do not care what you look like or what kind of swimsuit you choose to wear. I would notice if you were naked, but that I'd notice if you were fat or thin! Aside from that, I am there to enjoy MY vacation with my family and friends. I like seeing others having fun at the pool. The more the merrier on the slides! I just wanted the OP to know that I for one do not care in the least what she looks like in a bathing suit. Wear what makes YOU happy!

 

[jellydisney]

Go... enjoy yourself... I run and work on my figure all the time... and although I'm not overweight, I have a few varicose veins on the backs of my legs. I hate them, but I am not bothered enough to have them lasered away. I would rather use that money to visit WDW and use the waterparks where some poor kid with a few pimples will have to stand in line behind me for the Crush N Gusher and see them...

Me too! Ugh! I'm 22, and I hate to be seen in a bathing suit as well.. I think almost every single female aged 12 and older probably hates how they look in a bathing suit.

And it's true, we are our own worst critics. I NEVER look at other women and think "wow, she's heavy, she looks terrible"--I'm way too busy obsessing about my appearance.

Can we go back to the 1920's and wear those long pants/long-sleeved cotton bathing suits??? lol!

 

[kelscross]

I am a plus sized woman. Do I look perfect in my bathing suit?? By all means no. Do I give a crap on what people think of me in my bathing suit?? A resounding NO. Of course I would like to lose weight but those are demons I need to battle myself and not for other people. I am who I am. My motto is "If they don't like the way I look that's why God gave them a neck that turns"

I will be the bigger woman that is having a great time in the pool with my kids....waterslide and all!!!

 

[sweetinmaine]

I am a plus sized woman. Do I look perfect in my bathing suit?? By all means no. Do I give a crap on what people think of me in my bathing suit?? A resounding NO. Of course I would like to lose weight but those are demons I need to battle myself and not for other people. I am who I am. My motto is "If they don't like the way I look that's why God gave them a neck that turns"

I will be the bigger woman that is having a great time in the pool with my kids....waterslide and all!!!

Here Here!

 

[deedeed]

I am a plus sized woman. Do I look perfect in my bathing suit?? By all means no. Do I give a crap on what people think of me in my bathing suit?? A resounding NO. Of course I would like to lose weight but those are demons I need to battle myself and not for other people. I am who I am. My motto is "If they don't like the way I look that's why God gave them a neck that turns"

I will be the bigger woman that is having a great time in the pool with my kids....waterslide and all!!!

I love your motto! Its great!!