Do you have neighbors that don't socialize?

[Minnie824]

And if so, what do you think of them? I feel bad, cuz we don't socialize w/our neighbors very often. But, they are the opposite extreme...they have to socialize every second they're outside. Now with summer coming, I just dread it. They all have big backyards, but no one goes there. They all stand around in the middle of the street, parents talking w/their beers, kids running around w/no one watching them. We live in a very nice neighborhood, but I feel likes its a row of frat houses. When we're outside, I like spending time with my kids. And, unlike them, I don't let my 2 year old just run around down the street on her own without knowing where she is. I feel like they think we're rude, but DH & I work all week (only one other mom works) and we like spending our family time together as a family when we actually have some free time. I really have no desire to stand around making small talk. They set up 'street activities' for everyone on our block, even though we have 'subdivision activities' for the exact same thing. Anyway, just kindof annoying and felt like venting and seeing if anyone else has a similar situation. Or, if you're like any of my neighbors and wondering if you think I'm rude.

 

[Pin Wizard]

I don't socialize with neighbors and prefer it that way! Just because we live near each other does not classify them as a "friend." I choose my friends. And I choose not to socialize with anyone living nearby. We're rarely home as it is. On weekends we're off spending time with people I actually like!

 

[WhatATreat]

Your neighborhood sounds like mine with the beer drinking and the kids running around. I don't really participate in that, but manage to strike a nice balance by just saying "Hi" when I see them or chit chatting sometimes. I hope they don't think I'm rude. We do have one couple who lives on the street and never ever talks to anyone. Even if you say "Hi" first they will not respond. We refer to them as "the witness protection people".

 

[Cindy's Mom]

Actually, I'd love to live on your block. Sounds very friendly and neighborly.

 

[MushyMushy]

I've never lived in a sociable neighborhood. The one I'm in now is probably just about the best -- we can say hi to the neighbors and occasionally chat about the weather and that's just fine with us!

I have friends who live in very social neighborhoods and there's always some kind of drama going on behind the scenes. That's just not for me.

 

[stinkerbelle's mom]

Actually, I'd love to live on your block. Sounds very friendly and neighborly.

Me too, except I'm busy watching or following my kids while I'm drinking a soft drink & talking!

 

[Boston Tea Party]

I am the neighbor that doesn't socialize!

 

[Miss Jasmine]

We are not sociable with our neighbors, except for our next door ones, and that is more friendly than sociable.

Our neighbors across the street are nosy busy-bodies and hate it that we don't socialize with them. They called the sheriff's office one time and complained that we don't talk to them. Yes, seriously. The deputy told them that we don't have to talk to them. There is more that follows but lets just say a letter from our attorney finally shut them up.

 

[ilovejack02]

I miss my old street, we all hung out every afternoon in the summer and weekends. All the kids played everyday and everyone was such good friends, except that couple in blue house on the corner..... Is that you guys ???
Actually beer drinking only happens on a Sat and the little kids arent allowed out of the yards. Us mom usually chat over weeding and watering the flower beds and then men chat over the bar b q pits.

Now my best friend lives in a FUN neighborhood, in the middle of the place is a great park, the mom's call it Margarita park and at 5pm on the dot the moms pack up the kids and ride bikes and pull wagons down to it and the moms sit and chat and the kids play. Now thats my idea of fun, except I dont get more than about 1 margarita cuz its too hard to focus on the kids standing on top of the moneky bars if I drink much more than that.

 

[Tybug]

I guess I would be one of those social neighbors. We don't use the street(have a big back yard and huge decks. Kids are older so that's not a worry(no, a call to CPS is NOT in order!)... but we do use every excuse possible to have get togethers(cook outs, music, dancing). I don't socialize with my neighbors(coffee and the like) but they are always invited and most of the time come.

 

[wendy46001]

I think we are those witness protection neighbors...we work all week and then go away on the weekends...All our other neighbors have kids the same age and like to sit in their driveways ...We call them the garage sitters ...I'd much rather enjoy my backyard .....

I do say hi if someone says hi and wave if someone waves...
But i hate small talk...so i never say hi first…

but I have to admit at 8am when i have a cup of coffee in one hand, my newspaper in the other with my eyes half open I just ignore them...I don’t do mornings...sorry if that is unfriendly but most mornings I hardly talk to DH

 

[ducklite]

My neighborhood is social, but not over the top. We don't have "street activities" but we do stop to chat if we see each other out. There aren't many kids in the neighborhood, I'd say that 85% of the homes are owned by empty-nesters or "almost" empty-nesters with adult children still home. We all smile and wave as we see each other around. We make small talk where it's appropriate. We keep an eye on each others homes. A couple times a year someone will throw a party and invite the neighbors.

There is one house that the people are not very neighborly. They have never spoken to anyone in the neighborhood. Several neighbors have tried to strike up conversations with them, but they literally walk away. If they see someone coming near their home they go inside. If someone waves as they drive by they don't wave back. It's beyond keeping to themselves, it's to the point that it's very odd at best, very rude at worst.

Anne

 

[stargrazer]

Don't feel bad about not socalizing, that is totally your call and you should not feel compelled to participate in any way. There is a big difference between not socalizing and being rude though.

If you see them and say HI and then go in your house, no biggie. If you snub them purposefully or talk rude to them/disparage their choices in FRONT of them, that is a different story.

We talk to one of our neighbors for about an hour once a week over soda on the screen porch, and even though they party down and have a house full of people every weekend, they have never thought we were rude by not participating.

I like my privacy and appriciate that my neighbors respect that.

IMO.

 

[Barb]

Been there, done that. We did the neighbor thing for years-parties, picnics, events, etc. Sometimes, you just want to sit in your own yard, by yourself. It couldn't happen, someone was always stopping by to chat.

We moved out to the country and we love it. We have a few neighbors, but it's strictly hello, how are you? and no more. It's perfect! So I guess we could be the neighbors who don't socialize now.

 

[WhatATreat]

Don't feel bad Wendy. Our witness protection people are more like what Anne described. You sound like you are friendly, not rude.

 

[MelCald]

Now my best friend lives in a FUN neighborhood, in the middle of the place is a great park, the mom's call it Margarita park and at 5pm on the dot the moms pack up the kids and ride bikes and pull wagons down to it and the moms sit and chat and the kids play. Now thats my idea of fun, except I dont get more than about 1 margarita cuz its too hard to focus on the kids standing on top of the moneky bars if I drink much more than that.

This sounds like my neighborhood! Only we don't let the kids climb on top of the monkey bars..that way we can have the 2nd margarita..or third ....Actually, my neighbood really socializes on Friday nights. We have a weekly happy hour at our beach. Grownups get together for a few drinks and snacks and kids get to get together with their friends and have some soda and candy.

 

[ducklite]

Don't feel bad Wendy. Our witness protection people are more like what Anne described. You sound like you are friendly, not rude.

I don't think mine are "Witness Protection" but at times I do think they might be up to no good...

And I agree, I don't think Wendy is rude. There's a big difference between "private" and "rude." and there's nothing wrong with "private."

Anne

 

[Mkrop]

I like my nieghborhood we are not huge socializing group but everyone is real nice, I proabably talk to my next door neighbor the most becasue of our kids being friends.

But one day we were talking about when we were looking for houses and she mentioned this development not far from us, that each week a family takes a turn hosting "Happy Hour", whoever has the sign on their lawn is responsible for hosting and everyone heads over there. We both laughed because when each of us separately found out about this event in the development we hightailed it out of there and hence we bought houses where we did.

Different strokes for differnt folks.

Although I dont like the nosy neighbor we have or the ones who cant even muster a hello when you walk by.

 

[wendy46001]

I don't think mine are "Witness Protection" but at times I do think they might be up to no good...

And I agree, I don't think Wendy is rude. There's a big difference between "private" and "rude." and there's nothing wrong with "private."

Anne

Thanks...

Glad to know a quick wave and a hi before i wander back into the house is enough...

 

[lyzziesmom]

NONE of my neighbors talk to each other. I have lived in my house since Sept 2006 and have talked to two neighbors a total of twice each. I don't particularly like a super busy neighborhood, but we are all complete strangers, I wouldn't know them if I ran into them at the store. We have tried to be friendly but it's just a very quiet street. I kind of like it that way but it does get lonely.