Dis Breast Cancer Survivors Part II -GAGWTA!

[snappy]

Ann, Jennifer will be in my prayers. I am sorry she is facing bone mets.

What is your daughter doing in the fall? Is she gainfully employed? I sure look forward to that day for mine.

Amy, I was like you last year when my oldest left for college. His school is just 70 miles away and last year classes were Mon-Thursday only so he came home many weekends. It is still hard though because it truly feels like a crossroads when they first leave for college.

I made a mistake and did not go with DH to drop him off at college. The dorm was not ready any way (brand new) so it was a nightmare, he stayed at my friend's house for a few days until they opened it. Not a smooth transition. He never got himself organized. This year we are both going down, it is more complicated anyway since he will be living in the upstairs my MIL's rebuilt house, along with his older first cousin, her baby and her significant other.

With our daughter, DH and I are both going down to get her settled. Tulane has a lot of activities planned for the parents for 2 days next weekend. It is a different scenario since the majority of students are from out of state whereas as DS20's school, it is mostly a commuter school with effectively one dorm and one on-campus apartment complex.

We are meeting a mom from Colorado and her husband for a good dinner in New Orleans, so I think we will have a good time.

Amy, I hope things are looking a little brighter this morning. I found it helpful to journal a bit when I was down. I also get a lot of pleasure (and distraction) from working in the yard. Sometimes you need to do something for yourself as well. After the crunch time is over getting your son to college, hopefully you will splurge on yourself a little. How far from home will he be?
If you want to vent, pm me, we can commiserate about letting go.

Maureen, glad you had a good trip.

Linda, I understand the difficulty of your decision. I believe you made the right choice though. Knowledge is power and gives you more options. Should you be gene positive, your next moves very well might be different. The question of whether or not you are positive will be settled once and for all. It is also important info as you said for your relatives who might also choose testing.

The insurance problem and the $$ are real issues. I had never heard that after 10 years you might be insurable again. I have life insurance but I am not sure if it is guaranteed renewable forever. I guess I need to get some info on that point. I know at some time in the future the increase in the premiums will offset the benefit of keeping it in force. We are holding on until DD12 is launched so to speak.

I am glad we are speaking of this subject here, it may very well help others trying to decide as well.

GAGWTA!

Laurie

 

[Pea-n-Me]

I was fortunate, insurance covered the cost of testing. But they needed to confirm it first, kind of a big deal since it's so expensive. Kind of funny, leave it to me, one of the questions I asked when I was pondering all this was if I could have my ovaries out anyway (without testing) and my doc said yes, and that it would be covered. So that was yet another option (but also has other health implications, etc.)

One thing we had the foresight to do when we were young was to get good life insurance policies. (I also have some through work.) I believe the private ones are due for renewal in two years (the work ones are ongoing as long as I pay the premium). I called the ins company before and they said as long as I have them, they can't take them away, that I can always renew. I'm not sure how that works, or what the premiums will be like (I didn't want to get too detailed ) so I'll need to investigate that next year (or maybe I should have already ). Another time when I called asking about new policies they said I'd have to be cancer-free for 7 years.

At any rate, all of this, while important, seems a little less urgent than it did when I was first diagnosed - when my kids were just 5yo. Believe it or not, they are turning 11yo this October (which means next month will be 5 years ago that I found my lump). Hard to believe how fast time flies.

Which is why I can really sympathize with those of you sending a child off to college. I can't imagine. It always seemed so far away, but now I'm seeing it's really not. I try not to think about it too much because I'll be sending both of them at once, and my other baby, Liesl, will be 12yo (I've only had one Shepherd live past 12, and he was the one on wheels ). So I'm trying to really enjoy life as it is right now. to all of you sending babies off.

 

[snappy]

I was fortunate, insurance covered the cost of testing. But they needed to confirm it first, kind of a big deal since it's so expensive. Kind of funny, leave it to me, one of the questions I asked when I was pondering all this was if I could have my ovaries out anyway (without testing) and my doc said yes, and that it would be covered. So that was yet another option (but also has other health implications, etc.)

One thing we had the foresight to do when we were young was to get good life insurance policies. (I also have some through work.) I believe the private ones are due for renewal in two years (the work ones are ongoing as long as I pay the premium). I called the ins company before and they said as long as I have them, they can't take them away, that I can always renew. I'm not sure how that works, or what the premiums will be like (I didn't want to get too detailed ) so I'll need to investigate that next year (or maybe I should have already ). Another time when I called asking about new policies they said I'd have to be cancer-free for 7 years.

At any rate, all of this, while important, seems a little less urgent than it did when I was first diagnosed - when my kids were just 5yo. Believe it or not, they are turning 11yo this October (which means next month will be 5 years ago that I found my lump). Hard to believe how fast time flies.

Which is why I can really sympathize with those of you sending a child off to college. I can't imagine. It always seemed so far away, but now I'm seeing it's really not. I try not to think about it too much because I'll be sending both of them at once, and my other baby, Liesl, will be 12yo (I've only had one Shepherd live past 12, and he was the one on wheels ). So I'm trying to really enjoy life as it is right now. to all of you sending babies off.

Yea for 5 years and counting!! Can't believe the twins are almost 11.

I am glad you are in the enjoying life mode. The years fly faster the older I get. But it is funny, some things I enjoy more. I don't feel pressure to conform to things, I don't color my hair like I did when younger, I don't obsess about what I am wearing, prefer to be comfortable. Actually, I think I take comfortable to a whole new level, I feel entitled since I am older and hopefully wiser.

Not turning any heads with my Columbia fishing shirts and my cushie Teva and Merrill sandals, but I manage.

If DH ever gets a wild hair and decides he needs a "trophy" wife, he will have to look elsewhere.

Hey check Southwest, someone posted over on the transportion board a special they are running through August 21, travel through November something. Lower rates as usual for Tuesday and Wednesday.

 

[Amy]

Hi all! Thanks for the hugs and warm wishes. I'm feeling a little better today, although tomorrow when we drop DS18 off at college, who knows how I'll be! He'll only be 1.5 hours away, so I know he'll be coming home often (but not TOO often, I hope - I want him to make new friends and feel like college is home). He's joining the college marching band, so tomorrow is move-in day for band kids; next Thurs. is when the other freshmen arrive, so DH and I are already planning to go up again on Thurs for the "normal" parent/student orientation, plus take up whatever stuff we're forgetting.

And Laurie, I am planning a "Me" day - I also took next Wed. off months ago (when we weren't sure if DS was joining marching band or not), so I decided just to keep that day scheduled, and I'm going to the zoo (if it doesn't rain). The Pittsburgh Zoo had 2 elephants born last month, and I'm dying to see them and get some photos. They showed the 2 babies playing with each other on the news yesterday and they're so cute! If you can call a 300+ pound baby cute!

GAGWTA! (I HAVE to get the Tag Fairy to fix that typo in my tag one of these days) You ALL are always in my prayers; this thread was a Godsend for me when I was going thru my treatments years ago. Nothing can compare to talking to people who really DO understand what you're going through.

 

[snappy]

Hi all! Thanks for the hugs and warm wishes. I'm feeling a little better today, although tomorrow when we drop DS18 off at college, who knows how I'll be! He'll only be 1.5 hours away, so I know he'll be coming home often (but not TOO often, I hope - I want him to make new friends and feel like college is home). He's joining the college marching band, so tomorrow is move-in day for band kids; next Thurs. is when the other freshmen arrive, so DH and I are already planning to go up again on Thurs for the "normal" parent/student orientation, plus take up whatever stuff we're forgetting.

And Laurie, I am planning a "Me" day - I also took next Wed. off months ago (when we weren't sure if DS was joining marching band or not), so I decided just to keep that day scheduled, and I'm going to the zoo (if it doesn't rain). The Pittsburgh Zoo had 2 elephants born last month, and I'm dying to see them and get some photos. They showed the 2 babies playing with each other on the news yesterday and they're so cute! If you can call a 300+ pound baby cute!

GAGWTA! (I HAVE to get the Tag Fairy to fix that typo in my tag one of these days) You ALL are always in my prayers; this thread was a Godsend for me when I was going thru my treatments years ago. Nothing can compare to talking to people who really DO understand what you're going through.

I remember your tag misspelling from long ago. We are sure glad you posted again. Post again after you get through the weekend.

Would love to see pictures from your zoo trip.

I miss the New Orleans zoo. I guess I'll join up again.

 

[laurabelle]

weird I wrote a long post and lost it...I'll post later.

 

[lookingforward]

Hi everyone! Its so hard to catch up after a week away. I just got back from "meet the teacher" at my daughter's school. I can't believe she is in 4th grade. Time does fly. They start school on Monday here. Went supply shopping and uniform shopping. I am exhausted. Now I have to do 8 loads of laundry. My life is so exciting.

Ann, Jennifer is in my thoughts and prayers. It is so hard to face more cancer but I know they are making huge strides in bone mets treatments.

I have my plastic surgeon appt. on Wednesday. I am dreading it because my mom used to go with me to all of those. I am going to be a basket case. I have to schedule my implant surgery and I am 90% decided to do the other breast while I am at it. This fall is going to be tough....BUT...I am planning now (happily) a December disney vacation. It'll be short (3 nights) but FUN! And it will mark one year post cancer diagnosis.

I went to the Crimes Against Children conference in Dallas. I learned so much about internet predators, high profile cases, etc. It was a great learning experience. Dallas was ungodly hot, 104 degrees. I thought south Florida was bad!

More later...

 

[laurabelle]

~~~***GAGWTA sistas***~~~

Ok, I'll try to post again...

Ann- I feel like you, losing that post to cyber space!
I'm sorry I'll miss you! The flight on 10/3 leaves at 12:30. I will be praying for Jennifer. Does she know the extent of her mets?

Amy- I'm glad you are feeling better. You are smart planning a "me" day! That's exactly what you need. Thinking of you today as you take your son to college...I hope it is a positive experience. Maybe if you post on the Technical Board they can fix your tag.

Linda- Congrats on your upcoming 5yrs! My dr. found my lump in Oct. as well, but it was Dec. before I was dxed. Have you gone on www.facingourrisk.org ?
I opted not to test right now, only because I have already done all the surgeries and no one else in my family is interested in doing anything more than getting annual mamms. When my dds are older, I probably will test at that time. I figure they will have more information then. Right now the recommendation is that if you were dxed under age 40, your dds should begin screening 10 yrs prior to your dx age. I bet that's how Christina Applegate's bc was found by MRI.

Maureen-I'm so glad you have a trip planned around your cancerversary! I love Disney at Christmastime! I know your mom is with you in spirit...

Laurie- Did you make the crab casserole? I'm jealous, crab is so expensive here. Wanna share the recipe? I think it's cool that they have something for the parents at Tulane next weekend. I really don't have a clue as to how all that works. I'll be bugging you all about it in just a few years.

So yesterday was Dr. day for me and hubby. I saw my GI and we are both so pleased with the Humira! I just finished my steroids and he said if I can make it 6mo. without needing steroids the Humira should work well for the foreseeable future. But if not he has yet another drug I can try! Anything to keep my colon!

Hubby saw his primary for a physical and to talk about his panic attacks. I'm not happy with his recommendation. The dr. said he could do another test to check for calcium deposits. Hubby already had a ton of heart tests and there is nothing wrong with his heart, plus he has low cholesterol. He is healthy as a horse. This is def. a panic attack. The dr. wrote a rx for Xanax and said if he was having an attack to take one and if he felt better he would know it's a panic attack and not his heart. He is not walking around feeling anxious all the time, otherwise I would say yes take the pills. I really don't think that's the answer. Plus I know anti-anxiety meds need to be taken carefully, not just popping them here and there. I think what he really needs is to talk to someone. He holds everything in, never cried when I had cancer... it's going to come out one way or another and this is how it's manifesting. I told him this but I won't push the issue. I hope he will find someone.

I'm really up in the air about staying longer in WDW. One the one hand I would love to hang out, I'm just not sure with what's going on with hubby if it's a good time to be away from him. And I think, what if he has a bad panic attack on the plane and I'm not there...I don't know.

 

[Pea-n-Me]

Laura, what do you think is causing his panic attacks? I wonder if it's more common in middle age? Sometimes, too, there's a "precipitating event" from what I've seen, and that opens the door to worrying/panicking about things one never worried about before (a good friend has been going through this, too with her DH). I agree, taking a xanax after the onset doesn't seem especially helpful in preventing them in the first place. I would think the counseling would be helpful in identifying the cause, and also learning things like we learned guided meditation, visualization, etc, when he feels himself beginning to get anxious, would help immensely. Here's an excellent book which may be helpful, it's one of my favorites for this type of thing: http://www.amazon.com/Wellness-Book-Comprehensive-Maintaining-Stress-Related/dp/0671797506 I'm glad things are going well for you health wise.

 

[snappy]

My doc would not give me meds for my panic attacks as I only get them when driving over bridges. Of course where we live, bridges are a way of life.
I seemed to have a break through on it and drove over the spillway back in May but have not tried again. With two kids a school in New Orleans I no longer have an option, I have to do bridges.

I was so troubled a while back by how limiting my bridge panic stuff, I spoke to my breast surgeon. He told me he also has trouble with bridges and strongly advised counseling.

I did some counseling back in the early 90's when I felt like i was coming unglued having 2 small kids and working all the time. We did visualization and she had me get self-talk tapes. I used the tapes a lot. I believe they really helped. Not sure if they are still available, but I bet they are.

Laura, you can consult with me all you want about sending yours off to college in a few years. Maybe someone can benefit from learning from our mistakes. Actually, ask me about stuff beforehand too, college applications, ACT's, SAT's, filling out the FASFA, etc. No expert here, but I have a few tips.

I did not make the crab cakes, Laura, as I got distracted with getting ready for this weekend. We have been working since before 9 am trying to get all of DS20's stuff together so we can make a run to New Orleans with the majority of the stuff he'll need in Mamere's house. We also have to buy the bed and get that over there. We are leaving to help DS20 bring in everything and set it up in a few minutes. Last year we were less involved, we discovered he is the ultimate procrastinator and alot of stuff just languished in boxes. I DON"T want this happening at Mamere's house espescially with his cousin Jennifer and her little family living there. He is going to have to changes his ways now.

I do have the recipe though and will try it. I'll share it after I make it, I can't find my old one and I have not tried the new recipe yet. I wanna make sure it works.

I second the facingourrisk website. It is very good, Linda.

Laura, so glad the Humira is working.

 

[lookingforward]

I have panic attacks on elevators. I get VERY anxious while on elevators but only panic if the door delays in opening or I get stuck. Here is the weird thing....I never panic on any elevator at Disneyworld. I feel safe there. (except for the little elevator at Cinderella's castle which freaks me out). I am very claustrophopic. I have to have valium to do an open MRI. It started when I had kids, I don't know why. It really bothers me and people think I am strange. Oh well. I don't like bridges, either, but can make it through. I make my husband drive on the inside lane.

I am trying an anti-depressent Efexor (I think??) which seems to go well with tomoxofin. I hope it helps because I am having a hard time. I resisted until now, but I think I need some help.

Has anyone had lingering bone pain? My legs and knees are so stiff when I get up in the morning. My doc says it is from the taxane chemos. But it is really bothering me! Its not in one place, just deffuse achyness.

Hope you are all having a good weekend!

 

[laurabelle]

~~~***GAGWTA sistas***~~~

Thanks everyone. His panic attacks don't have a specific trigger, although being in a crowded room will bring on the fight/flight aspect of it... he's had to leave church, he had to leave the girl's dance recital...but it just comes out of nowhere. Most of it revolves around being married to me! And things from his childhood that he holds in. He first started having it about 2yrs ago, when I was actually feeling really well. Here I am, feeling great and he's getting it again. I don't think it completely went away during the time in between, but it was not as bad. Plus going to Wendy's funeral, she's his friend's wife who recently died of pancreatic ca. He played guitar at her funeral. I know he was thinking of losing me to cancer the whole time, and it was rough for him. The girls and I were at WDW then he met up with us there because he already had committed to play a gig. That was Father's Day, and this upcoming trip is during his birthday. Oh yes, and $, that's a great stresser!

Thank you for the book recommendation Linda. I'll look for it. I know there are some things he'd be willing to try. His music is a great outlet. He is running. I would like him to try yoga/meditation. I have a DVD "for dummies" that is actually really good and I used it with my dd when she had sleep problems and it really helped her. I think we are going back to the lake next weekend. I think being out in nature helps. I've been encouraging him to relax more around the house too and he has been. He's also the type that never asks for anything and I told him he has wants and needs like anyone else so I expect to hear him asking for things and not acting like he doesn't matter. When I had cancer treatment and all the times when I was so fatigued and sick with UC he took over doing everything around the house. I told him it really actually feels good for me to be able to do more and I'm also training up the girls doing housework so he needs to let it go...ok, not all of it!

Another thing, and if you've read this far, thanks! I handed over the online group for young survivors that I started to another member. I just turned 46, and I'm almost 10yrs out and I'm so done with cancer. God led me to start it, but it was never mine to keep, I was just a caretaker. It has grown tremendously and I'm proud to say I kept it a positive encouraging place. I have made some life long friends there and plan to continue meeting up with them annually. I feel like God has something new for me, but I don't know what that looks like yet. Right now I think it's about raising teens and being a good wife and helping my hubby through this dark time.

Thanks for being here sistas!

 

[Pea-n-Me]

Nice post, Laura. Your last paragraph brought tears to my eyes. God, think of how many women you've helped! I think you are very wise to know when the time is turn it over. I'm glad you are moving on to the next chapter in your life. Similarly, I am too, sort of. It's kind of funny how cancer takes up this big chunk of your life but slowly you move past it. Now that I'm there and my kids are getting a little older, I'm trying to figure out what's next for me, too. I guess it's all about the stages of life we all go through...

As for your husband, I do think a lot of *our* anxiety (at this age) is related to illness and death. I know I've been feeling it a lot myself lately too. We still can't believe BIL is gone. His children were out with us the other night and I silently to myself about the situation. I worry about being in a similar situation myself, or my DH. I think it's natural. World events and the economy don't help, either. I think everyone's on edge about a lot of things - money, jobs, politics, war, cheating spouses, gas and heating costs, home values, salmonella outbreaks, abductions, accidents, you name it - we are really not in a good spell at all. I sometimes get down just watching the nightly news!

Kids had a birthday party and sleepover last night so DH and I went into Boston for a night to ourselves. We had a low key dinner at our favorite greasy spoon and then bopped all over the city taking pictures, something I've been wanting to do with my "new" camera for a while. Boston really is an amazing city! At one point I was standing on the exact spot where the Boston Massacre took place when a whole group of Redcoats walked by! Yes, tons of stuff going on everywhere, so much to see and do.

 

[snappy]

I sometimes get down just watching the nightly news!

Amen to that, I have enjoyed the Olympics so much. I wish there wasn't such a political tone even there but I try to tune out all the commentary and watch those amazing athletes.

 

[snappy]

I have to say. I was tingling all over when I read both of your posts this morning.

Laura, I applaud you for reading your situation and making the move to move on so to speak. It is easy to procrastinate about things like this, especially when it is something so near and dear to your heart. As LInda said, I can only imagine how many women have benefitted from your site for young women. What a gift!!

I do think you guys are right about the reality of aging and the ultimate consequences of that causing middle age anxieties. As our parents, aunts and uncles, siblings, cousins, etc. are experiencing serious disease or death, we have to come to grips with the fact that we are have become or are becoming the senior generation.

I was amazed at how Mamere is slipping after being with her yesterday. Claudette (DH's oldest sister who Mamere lives with) told us that she is not taking her Alzeimer medicine. DH seemed astounded that she was on this med, apparently noone ever mentioned to him she was prescribed it. I think rebuilding the house, although somewhat a victory over Katrina, has also set her back a little as she keeps worrying about the same things over and over and there were so many decisions she had to make during the reconstruction.

I guess we tend to live alot in the past with our memories about the way it was, but my gosh this is hard. I like to think of Mamere and how she kept all thre of our kids at her house for months, even years after birth. I do think talking about our anxieties with someone is helpful. Somehow saying those innermost fears out loud to someone, even if it is an objective third pary, helps.

My sister told me yesterday that she is working in therapy on her relationship with our mom. Seems when they talk over the phone it goes on for hours, and mom has told her that she is more upset after they hang up. My sister is overwhelming angry with our brother in Costa Rica who is manipulating mom.
She realizes her anger is over the top, and she feels some of the angst originates in stuff from childhood. Regardless, I am relieved she has a professional to talk to, and that she also feels comfortable talking about it with me. She lives far enough away that we don't see each other regularly but we are often on the phone together.

Mamere's house by the way, looked very nice yesterday, DD20 is thrilled to get to live there. The house is blocks from his college and will provide a much more stable environment for HIM to live and study in. IT BETTER!!!! We brought a lot of stuff there yesterday, DH and DS are going to get the bed in today, and my assignment is to get the rest of the stuff he needs (I am the shopper extraordinaire)!!! There is also a good bit of cleaning to do, I worked on getting the new fridge wiped down inside and ready to go, but we (read that as I) need to clean, mostly vacuuming a bit. I want to get at that beautiful new porcelain tile with my swiffer as well. Unfortunately, the contractor is not quite finished or I would have tackled that today. I would not have minded too much, DH teated us to a great seafood restaurant and DD12 and I had the best oyster poboy I have had in years!!! Gosh, the french bread baked in New Orleans is so much better than the poor excuse for a french bread they pawn off on us here.

I am off to Shreveport with my merry little band from work for a couple of days, so the end of this week should be interesting with also getting DD18 ready for move in to her dorm on Saturday.

I feel so busy, I have not had time to be sad they are going. I have this idea that now that DS20 has permanent digs, that he might not come home the whole time at Christmas and during the summer. Even though he was working and taking classes all summer, at least he was home at night!!! I think we are at a crossroads. I just hope the interaction with DS and Jennifer and her family goes well. They were at the house when we arrived with DS's stuff and we did have a wonderful visit. That baby is wonderful. I wish I had taken a picture of DS holding Jacob, I had the camera, but I was too distracted.

GAGWTA!!!

 

[snappy]

Kids had a birthday party and sleepover last night so DH and I went into Boston for a night to ourselves. We had a low key dinner at our favorite greasy spoon and then bopped all over the city taking pictures, something I've been wanting to do with my "new" camera for a while. Boston really is an amazing city! At one point I was standing on the exact spot where the Boston Massacre took place when a whole group of Redcoats walked by! Yes, tons of stuff going on everywhere, so much to see and do.

Boston sounds so amazing!! I have only visited once, when my parents were in Connecticut so that ws when I was around 20.

So was there some sort of reenactment of the period going on? How fascinating!!

How about a Boston meet, sistas?

Pictures, please!!

 

[Sha]

Laura, you have been a blessing to many people I am sure. I am not familar with the site you referred too but from knowing you here, along with all these other wonderful women.. you all help others so much with your experiences, even those who see it from the outside of the experience (from work and family members having had cancer).

As for panic attacks... I had one back in late March/early April. Was my first and worst ever full blown. Was scary! Mine are very mild normally and I just need to think it through the steps of calming it all down. Things like deep breathing (deep in through nose and out slow from mouth.. smell the roses, blow out the candles), visualization techniques, music... back rubs in clockwise rotations all are helpful. Very important to try and break the cycle as quickly as possible. I also have used Rescue Remedy from the health store for 10 years when really stressed. Was a big seller by my classmates last year. Lots of helpful information out there, but I agree that talking to someone is the best asset.

Ann... will add Jennifer to prayers.

"Me days" are wonderful!! I strongly encourage them!!! Just like a solo trip to WDW well, any trip to Disney (Land, World, Paris... etc)

Amen to that, I have enjoyed the Olympics so much. I wish there wasn't such a political tone even there but I try to tune out all the commentary and watch those amazing athletes.

There really isnt supposed to be political tones there... but I think the commentaries are bringing it in and not the athletes*. Not sure if you read the article about a US Basketball player when to play for Germany. I dont have a problem with that... he wants to play a sport he loves. Kobe Bryant* (exception) went up to him in the parade of nations "Say one word in German, just one." Treating him like a traitor. Its not spy work, its games. sorry.. OT (am thrilled with how well the US is doing.. but rooting for all athletes to do their best)

 

[snappy]

Speaking of atheletes, My DD12 is in love with Michael Phelps. I think his performance will inspire many swimmers all over the world.

I love the way he couldn't wait to give his family a kiss and a hug after he got his 8th gold.

I need to see that, I just read about it in the paper a few minutes ago.

Even makes me want to locate my goggles and sign up for the rec center again (Bally's doesn't have a pool).

Hey Sha, how is mom?

 

[Pea-n-Me]

DH and DS are going to get the bed in today

At first I misread this as "DH and I are going to get in to bed today" and was like, whoa, snappy, You Go, Girl!

 

[Pea-n-Me]

I was amazed at how Mamere is slipping after being with her yesterday. Claudette (DH's oldest sister who Mamere lives with) told us that she is not taking her Alzeimer medicine. DH seemed astounded that she was on this med, apparently noone ever mentioned to him she was prescribed it. I think rebuilding the house, although somewhat a victory over Katrina, has also set her back a little as she keeps worrying about the same things over and over and there were so many decisions she had to make during the reconstruction.

I guess we tend to live alot in the past with our memories about the way it was, but my gosh this is hard. I like to think of Mamere and how she kept all thre of our kids at her house for months, even years after birth.

They usually start people on it at the first sign of dementia. It really is sad to watch the decline in our loved ones.

BTW, in case anyone's interested, I posted a little about my experience with my aunt on the C&C board. http://www.disboards.com/showthread.php?t=1923000&referrerid=70088