DH had rotten news, now he is not up to the cruise...

[CRSNDSNY]

Originally posted by GenieDana
Let him see you packing some Victroria's Secrets and he'll cheer right up!

I like this idea!

Ann -- the best you could do now is be super supportive and maybe plan some fun little special things here and there during your cruise. He has every right to be upset and you have every right to be concerned. Make the best that you can of the current situation and mood, but remember that you may not be able to completely dissipate it. You can do your very best and keep reminding him of how proud you are of him. He's lucky to have someone so supportive and loving in his life.


***pixie dust to you and your hubby!***

 

[Wishing on a star]

LOVE what Jim wrote!!!!

Some great advice here Ann... Nobody thinks that anyone is a crybaby. And, it is soooo true that when something hits you, emotionally, like that, well you cant just 'control' your feelings!!!! Let him know that you really understand, and let him work through it! HE has to do this... telling him to 'cheer up' could just add frustration.

Give him a few days, and by the time you are on that ship, I'll bet he will have a GREAT time!!!

PS: YES, it is true that these types of things, unfortunately ARE purely political. I guess it just hit your DH like a slap in the face to see the reality and to experience this for himself. I am so sorry that he did not get the position!!!!

 

[crisi]

A similiar thing happened to my husband - and shortly before our last Disney trip as well. He was reorganized, and what was supposed to be (i.e. everyone believed it would be, his old boss thought it was or wouldn't have let him go) a promotion for him turned into a lateral move under a guy that didn't like him with an organization he'd been at loggerheads with.

He was bummed for about a month, but its started to clear up. He remembered that he DOES enjoy what he does for a living, that he IS pretty well paid to do it. The recognition via promotion would have been nice - a reorg into an organization where he liked the people better would have been nice - but he is still doing a job he enjoys.

And what happened is that his attitude changed, his new boss is recognizing that there was a reason everyone expected him to get rewarded with the promotion (he does a good job) - and actually pushed through a smaller promotion for him, and began to like him, and working within the organization has changed the politics. Six months later he is nearly as happy as he was (perhaps a bit disillusioned).

Has your husband enjoyed the job he has been doing or has it merely been a stepping stone to promotion? If he has been enjoying his job (and I suspect he has, if he hasn't been playing the other games associated with a political promotion), he still gets to do it. Yes, recognition would be nice, but this sort of thing doesn't reflect badly on him - everyone knows these things are political and often those jobs go to the lesser qualified but better connected candidate.

Best wishes.

 

[HooKooDooKu]

I know it sounds like a cry baby "oh poor me I didn't get the promotion"

He does not sound like a cry baby. The facts of life HAVE "slapped him in the face" and so he deserves to feel down right now. As long as he has his integrity, he's got reason to hold his head high even during this period of feeling down.

of course Victoria's REAL secret is Ann is too fat for a thong

Doesn't matter. You can still do something to dress sexy for DH. It's a little late to start shopping at the various online retailers that cater to women that can't shop at Victoria's secret (and that's alot of women given that while Victoria might have bra's up to and perhaps larger than DD, apparently Victoria doesn't realize women with a chest size over 38 are still sexy). Depending upon your exact situation, you should be able to find something at general places like JCPennys, or there is also Lerner's (or other women's specialty shops) that might be at your local mall.

 

[4nana]

It is indeed difficult to watch our men, who have worked so hard, be dissappointed like this. Altho this may seem like a bummer now, it is just a little test of faith. Keep your chin up, it may actually be a blessing in disguise to be revealed thru patience ^i^.

Thankfully your cruise seems to be perfect timing! As you watch the ship leave dock, you enter a world of magic and can reflect on just how blessed you are. Have a wonderful Birthday and a magical trip with your DH and DS.

Keep the faith ^i^
~ Sandie

 

[outahere]

Ann,

Nearly the exact same situation happened to me a few years ago. The director of our IT department left the company and everyone in the IT department, and a lot of others in the company, assumed I would be promoted into the postion. However..... someone who was more "connected" within the company was given the position, even though he had no IT experience (to my 20+ years). Long story, short.......... three years later, the company was reorganized and I was promoted into the original position, while the "other guy" was moved into something else.

Like Jim said, everything happens for a reason. It took me quite a while to get past this, but I focused on doing the best job I could. Things usually have a way of working themselves out.

My $.02 worth......... focus on getting to the ship and having a wonderful time. It's amazing what powerful magic Disney has, and I'm sure you'll have a fantastic time. I'm sending some extra pixie dust your way, just for good measure.

 

[natdencro]

The best way to recover from ANY disappointment/trauma........... is a Disney cruise! Our motto here is Work to Live........... not Live to Work! No amount of money can ever make up for a happy family life. With all this pixie dust which is being sprinkled over you all, things will be just fine, Im sure. Put that big smile on your face............. and ......... altogether now............. "M.I.C.K.E.Y MOUSE! Enjoy............... life is too short to be miserable. Happy cruising. Nat

 

[jrabbit]

Work to Live........... not Live to Work!

Amen!

We work so we can go on nice (Disney) vacations!

 

[AnnMorin]

Thank all of you for bringing a smile to my face, such a wonderful community we have. Yes craig I am a preschool teacher (it is a wonderfully fulfilling vocation) I wrote your cabin down and will try to give you a call on board.
thanks again everyone....

 

[jlp651]

No pun intended...
BF got passed over for a promotion...he was already in the "temp spot"...and had been for 2 years...he ran a strong shift-we work in the emergency service field where building your team is everything...everyone was shocked that he didnt get the job...he was P!&*&^^ED that he didnt get it...we all were...it took some time adjusting...but you have to let him go thru the phases of "grief" I guess...I let him vent...yell scream...look for other jobs...he is still 2nd in command...but he doesnt have a strong supervisor...as we always say "pay no attention to the man behind the curtain" he does a lot to still keep that shift together...
Everyone has said...sunshine will make it all better...keep being supportive...and remember...you have to have the bad times to appreciate the good times!!!

 

[Lisa F]

First of all, I must strongly disagree with the Victoria's Secret thing. I really don't think that making him wear women's underwear is going to help the situation

Seriously, people who think well of your husband are not going to change their minds about it because he was passed over for a promotion (especially under those circumstances!). I'm sure he will continue to behave in the kind of way that made people like him so much in the first place and everyone will continue to be impressed by him. Also, when ONE thing doesn't go your way, it doesn't mean that you've wasted your time getting to where you are today. Sometimes you need to take a step back and realize that everything you HAVE accomplished is pretty impressive and give yourself a pat on the back. It's way too easy to let one disappointment overshadow lots and lots of success, but you shouldn't let it.

Anyway, there's nothing like that warm caribbean breeze and that misty ocean air to make you feel better... but just let the man wear his boxers.

 

[jgalecpa]

I must strongly disagree with the Victoria's Secret thing. I really don't think that making him wear women's underwear is going to help the situation

ROTFLOL!!!!

Jim

 

[AnnMorin]

I am wiping the tears from my eyes from the laugh you just gave me Lisa! Thanks!
He is feeling a bit better today, more people came up to him today and I think he is realizing just what you said, that this one event does not define him. I am so glad we are going away Friday, he started his vacation at noon today so I think we will come back refreshed and move on. I was telling my boss about it, (she is on his list of people to testify before the govenor on his behalf for the permanant appointment) she said for him to "take a deap breath, know he is an honorable man, and when it is his time it will happen without him having to comprimise his integrity. That now just may not be the right time for him." He did laugh and said today well I guess I trained her well (his employee who now will be his boss) maybe too well. I just hugged him and said "you never do things half way" So things are settleing down, the initial shock/embarresment is ebbing..thanks again everyone.. I hope the ship has stocked up on it's liquor because I plan to keep him drunk and silly for seven days

 

[NAT&MAGSMOM]

Well, Ann...what can I say....

I'm ROTFLMAO at the Victoria's Secret stuff.....

Crying for your DH..we'll tell you about having to close our business etc..the people who destroyed our house in ORL..etc..
the as_ _ _ _ _ I had to put with at work, etc.....

Pressing all the clothes that are just going to get re-wrinkled..
Trying to get Natalie to do her homework....

And then thinking about all of US having MANY drinks this coming week....let's see programming is open from 0900 to 0100..right??

Shoot, I'll come there and testify before the governor....don't know your governor..but I've known a few in my my time...

Just tell him to hang in there and if it helps...he has lots of people on this board 100% behind him....

Later...
Phyllis