Dating Someone is who Separated

[Jodi1980]

not divorced. What is your opinion?

 

[Pin Wizard]

Been there, done that, TROUBLE!

Of course when I first met the "jerk" he told me he was divorced. Three weeks later he told me..."I'm only separated."

 

[gepetto]

Depends on how long they've been separated. I think it'd be ok so long as they're not still mooning around after their soon to be ex.

 

[WebmasterMaryJo]

<font color=navy>My opinion is that

if you're looking for a fun time w/o commitment ......

you have a chance of being the "transition woman" & the relationship (if one develops) won't last ....

in all fairness, I wouldn't advocate getting involved with someone who's only separated, as I would hope that he would repair his relationship with his wife, and your involvement with him would only deter that ...

... but then, that's just my opinion

 

[The Mystery Machine]

Never...I would run away, very fast.

 

[lisaschu]

Is the divorce in process? I met my husband in the beginning phases of the divorce process. We didn't start dating until a few months later and within six months the divorce was final. Had they been only separated I think I would have been leery. However, because children were involved we took the dating process very slow. I did not meet his children until nearly 9 months after we started dating. He was also "injured" emotionally so we mutually agreed to take things slow. Obviously it worked out quite well for me. We'll be married four years this September and we're expecting our first child in December. My suggestion is to take things slow and give the relationship time to develop. Everybody and every divorce is different.

Lisa

 

[Serena]

I would not appreciate it.

Until they are divorced, they are married and off limits.

 

[wvjules]

I don't see anything wrong with it. If you're interested and want to go out with him, go for it.

On the other hand, if he's only been separated for a couple of weeks, I'd have to say no.

 

[Disney Doll]

Doesn't seem smart t me. You're not seeing the true person...you're seeing one injured by emotional pain, anger etc.

 

[wvjules]

Where does it say that he's injured by emotional pain and anger? I was tickled when I was separated. No pain, anger, or emotional injuries for me. Sometimes separation/divorce is a good thing. Not everyone is irreversably damaged by it.

 

[Otimon]

Until divorced, the separated individual is still married. Personal opinion is that it's best to wait until strings are no longer attached.

 

[Tuffcookie]

Two questions: Are you sure they're separated??? Have they filed for divorce??? If they are separated and haven't filed for divorce, don't get involved. Also, if they are separated and have filed for divorce DO NOT allow yourself to be used to make the soon to be ex, jealous. DO NOT accompany him to pick up the kids for visitation. In fact, have no interaction with the soon to be ex spouse. In other words, keep a low profile....

TC

 

[Harley Chick]

Been there, done that, married him. Was it smart? I haven't got a clue. His divorce took 4 years (certainly not by his choice, or mine).

 

[MeanLaureen]

Well I guess I'm going to get flamed here. DH Matthew (Obi-Wan Pinobi) and I started dating when I was just seperated and my divorce wasn't final until 6 months later.

 

[Jeff in BigD]

I wouldn't do it.

I can't tell you how many couples I've known that were "seperated" that were on again, off again for years.

Then again I personally probably wouldn't date someone who was divorced either.

 

[glo]

Everybody has different opinions on this. I will tell you this follow your gut. You know the answer...do what you feel is right. We do not know the entire story. hugs and good luck either way.

 

[Poohbear123]

My first DH I THOUGHT, was divorced, she had moved away to another City, and later on, I found out, to ESCAPE HIM! (I escaped 5 years later) only to date ANOTHER seperated guy..............His divorce was 6 months after mine, and we have been together for 16 YEARS! If I were OUT IN THE FIELD, so to speak, I would RUN RUN RUN Away!

 

[Serena]

I want to amend my previous answer.
In some circumstances the couplde aren't finished and it is hard to know exactly what is going on. To let them finish whatever they need to finish seems safer for all involved.
Some couples are not a couple for a long time before the divorce and some people can be vindictive and not let one go through.
It really depends on the people involved.

But do me and other's a favor. If you happen to be a friend of the wife also, just stay away. Don't be so available that he turns to you to boost his ego and complain about the wife.

 

[Breezy_Carol]

Protect yourself. If he is only separated and the divorce is not friendly, his ex could charge him with adultery and your name would be dragged into the mess too.

 

[Disney Dee]

As long as he is seperated, nothing wrong with dating him, why wait maybe afew yrs to date again? Some divorces take a long time if kids, homes and money are issues that sometimes take awhile to resolve My fiance and I were both married but seperated when we met, if we waited to date until we got divorces, we would have missed a good yr of being together!