co-ed sleepover for 19 kids... all ages 6 - 8?

[Papa Deuce]

If you knew that in advance, would you let your kids go to the sleepover at all?

My daughters were invited to a sleepover at their friend's house. They have done this several times at this house. It was always about 8 girls, give or take. So, based on previous times we let our kids go.

Well, my kids called home to say goodnight and told us that there are 12 girls and 7 boys at the sleepover. The girls will be staying in the family room with the mom, and the boys will be with the dad in the living room.

We were never informed that this would be the case when our kids were invited. I may or may not have let them go, but surely I think we should have been told in advance what the deal was.

Would you have let your kids attend such an event if you knew the situation?

 

[Allison]

At 6-8 years old, yes. The coed aspect wouldn't bother me at that age.

ETA-It's way too many kids though.

 

[N&B'smom]

I voted 'not sure' but I'm going to say probably not. I think that's WAY too many kids to keep track of and the co-ed thing just freaks me out. You just never know these days.

Shelby

I should add I have a DS that is 9, and my opinion is based on the behavior that I have witnessed of other kids his age, girls and boys alike.

 

[Mouse House Mama]

Forget the co-ed part. I would not let my child sleep at someone's house with 18 other children and only 2 adults.


Disclaimer- I am not a fan of the sleepover at all though.

 

[NMAmy]

The co-ed part doesn't really bother me but that seems like way too many kids for just two adults to try to control at a sleepover.

 

[Papa Deuce]

Forget the co-ed part. I would not let my child sleep at someone's house with 18 other children and only 2 adults.


Disclaimer- I am not a fan of the sleepover at all though.

I think I agree, but still we should have been told about the co-ed part.

 

[EpcotBeauty]

Forget the co-ed part. I would not let my child sleep at someone's house with 18 other children and only 2 adults.


Disclaimer- I am not a fan of the sleepover at all though.

Same here. We do 1 on 1 sleepovers.

 

[Anewman]

I would say parents need to know in advance, but If I trusted the parents in charge I would allow my kids to go.

If it was at neverland ranch, NO WAY... I dont need the money that bad.

 

[Papa Deuce]

The co-ed part doesn't really bother me but that seems like way too many kids for just two adults to try to control at a sleepover.

Two adults and a 14 year old sister..... not sure if that is a good or bad thing....

 

[tchrrx]

I don't like the co-ed thing either. I also think that's a lot of kids for 2 adults to have to keep up with & keep entertained for that long.

My DD8 will be going to her first slumber party next month. She's stayed the night with a friend before, but never in a group. The party will be from 7-9 with boys & girls. Only girls will be staying the night. I think that's a great solution so that everyone is included.

 

[Pigeon]

No, we're not doing co-ed sleepovers.

My niece was once invited to a co-ed sleepover hosted by a very wealthy family. The host mom told my sister that there was no need to worry about the kids (this was high school) getting into any trouble. They would be sleeping outside on the grounds of the estate, and she'd rented two large tents, one for the boys and one for the girls. If the kids needed anything, they could come into the house and get an adult.

My sister wouldn't let dn sleep over, but she was willing for her to go to the party and stay till 11pm, at which point my sister would pick her up. So for weeks my sister had to listen to whining from dn about her being the meanest mother in the universe, the only mom not to trust her kid, etc.

The night of the party she goes to pick up dn, and lo and behold half a dozen of dn's girlfriends asked my sister if she would let them go home with dn or if she would drive them home.

The whole setup made the kids uncomfortable and they'd actually wished their parents had said no to give them an out for not staying. Sometimes kids have more sense than their parents.

 

[Buckalew11]

No, I would not. Mostly because I would not want to set a precedence.

I think they have too many kids per adult there but I think also think they too a huge risk in assuming all the parents would be OK with this arrangement. Actually, I'd be mad as heck if the parents made this choice for me. And you better believe we'd be having a talk.

 

[golfgal]

For 6-8 year olds co-ed doesn't bother me, but then we have boy/girl twins and had many co-ed sleepovers at that age. I can't believe they have 19 kids there. Some parents are perfectly capable of handling that many kids, I am NOT one of them .

Our 13 year old twins had a co-ed "sleepover" last weekend. We were visiting our old town and stayed at our good friends' house. One of DD's friends also spent the night and our friends have a 14 year old son. These kids have all been best buddies since they were 4 and none of us thought anything about the 'sleepover' at all. I wouldn't let our twins have co-ed sleepovers with anyone else though!

 

[Mouse House Mama]

No, we're not doing co-ed sleepovers.

My niece was once invited to a co-ed sleepover hosted by a very wealthy family. The host mom told my sister that there was no need to worry about the kids (this was high school) getting into any trouble. They would be sleeping outside on the grounds of the estate, and she'd rented two large tents, one for the boys and one for the girls. If the kids needed anything, they could come into the house and get an adult.

My sister wouldn't let dn sleep over, but she was willing for her to go to the party and stay till 11pm, at which point my sister would pick her up. So for weeks my sister had to listen to whining from dn about her being the meanest mother in the universe, the only mom not to trust her kid, etc.

The night of the party she goes to pick up dn, and lo and behold half a dozen of dn's girlfriends asked my sister if she would let them go home with dn or if she would drive them home.

The whole setup made the kids uncomfortable and they'd actually wished their parents had said no to give them an out for not staying. Sometimes kids have more sense than their parents.

Unless she is electrifying those tents to keep the kids out did she really think they would stay in their own tents?

Good for your sister for not letting her stay. Smart woman.

 

[Buckalew11]

No, we're not doing co-ed sleepovers.

My niece was once invited to a co-ed sleepover hosted by a very wealthy family. The host mom told my sister that there was no need to worry about the kids (this was high school) getting into any trouble. They would be sleeping outside on the grounds of the estate, and she'd rented two large tents, one for the boys and one for the girls. If the kids needed anything, they could come into the house and get an adult.

My sister wouldn't let dn sleep over, but she was willing for her to go to the party and stay till 11pm, at which point my sister would pick her up. So for weeks my sister had to listen to whining from dn about her being the meanest mother in the universe, the only mom not to trust her kid, etc.

The night of the party she goes to pick up dn, and lo and behold half a dozen of dn's girlfriends asked my sister if she would let them go home with dn or if she would drive them home.

The whole setup made the kids uncomfortable and they'd actually wished their parents had said no to give them an out for not staying. Sometimes kids have more sense than their parents.

I had a client tell me that her HS son was invitied to a co-ed sleepover. She told him know also and he whined and carried on thinking as the event drew closer he'd change her mind. Finally, she told him not to ask ask or comment anymore because the answer was NOT changing, it was a big "NO".

He then yelled at her and said, "Well, YOU will be causing me to drink and drive if you do not let me spend the night!" Oops!!
I do not think he meant to share that part of the party with her...

Come to find out, the parents of the party giver were supplying alcohol and then allowing the kids to spend the night so that they would not be on the road. Nice, real nice.

 

[rie'smom]

This one is easy for me. A few years ago there was a coed sleep over. The kids were in 2nd grade. One of the girls later told everyone that she saw that she slept with her boyfriend at the slumber party. She thought that she sounded grown up.
Of course everyone knew that the kids didn't know what she was talking about but still it sounded bad.
I don't have any kids that age anymore but if I did, the answer would be no.

 

[clh2]

I know several parents who had coed parties for their elementary school children, HOWEVER...the boys always had to leave about 10. and the sleepover was just for the girls.

 

[justhat]

The boys aspect wouldn't bother me at that age, particularly since you said they'll be sleeping in separate rooms with the parents, but the number of kids would get me. Actually, I can't imagine my kids sleeping at any friend's house at 6yo so maybe that's why 19 of them would scare me.

 

[aprilgail2]

My daughter went to one last year when she was 7- there were about 15 kids there- 5 of them were boys. The party was for triplets (2 girls and one boy). The dad said that the boys would be sleeping downstairs and he was sleeping in front of the staircase in the basement so no boys would be coming upstairs.

 

[mamacatnv]

At that age it would not bother me but I cannot imagine arriving, dropping off my kids and not knowing. I always call ahead and get all details so that I know what is going on.

I am surprised the host parents did not inform all the parents, didn't someone get a clue when the batman and princess sleeping bags were piled up next to each other

As for a co-ed sleepover for teens - back in the day that was referred to far differently than a slumber party
Now my 18 year old is in a co-ed dorm...........The director of housing asked us parents at orientation "Have any of you hosted a 9 month slumber party?"