Chivalry is dead.

[Indiana Rose Lee]

I don't think men should be expected to give up their seat to a woman or a person with a child. The "with a child" thing irks me. Parents need to take responsibility for having their kids on vacation and not expect special treatment. If you would prefer to sit, then like others have said... wait for the next bus. A child does not give you front of the line access, free license to cut in lines, or first choice of seats on a bus. (Not that anyone here would ever assume such a thing! )

Peace.

I'm sorry, but in your world does "peace" mean "screw you?" Because that is much more the attitude in your post.

As far as the topic at hand, my boys are being raised to be polite, think of others, share, and behave in a chivalrous manner. I like it. It warms my heart, and makes their grandparents proud. They are now big enough to stand and they do.

 

[TheGoofster]

This reminds me of a story one of my teachers told.

He said that one day he was walking out a door, when he saw a lady approaching. So, like he would always do, he held the door open for her. The lady actually got mad at him, and said "How dare you open the door for me just because I'm a lady", to which he replied, "Madam, I didn't hold the door open for you because you are a lady, but because I am a gentleman."

When my family gets on a bus, this is how we usually handle a getting crowded situation. First we start with 4 seats, then if the need arises, my daughter will sit in my lap, so now we are only using 3 seats. Until recently, the next step would have been my son would take my daughters place on my lap, and my daughter would sit in my wife's lap - 2 seats (but now that my son is older), the next step would be may daughter sitting in my wife's lap, my son has his own seat, and I would stand for whatever lady (or other person who may actually need it) who doesn't have a seat. The next step would be my son would also give up his seat to a lady (or somebody in need of it). And finally my wife and daughter would also stand (for an elderly person or a lady with a baby, etc...).

Now, if my actions should happen to offend anybody here, then I would repeat what my teacher said. I am not giving up my seat just because you are a lady, but instead because I am a gentleman, and I would like to teach my son to be the same as well.

 

[mpls_mm]

I don't expect anyone to give up their seats for me, I do hate it when kids are crying that they are tired and everyone looks away. We are all able bodied, but I usually offer my seat up. My husband is one that doesn't offer unless it's an older person or a pregnant woman or one with kids, however if it is going to work out that a svelte 20 year old in a bikini top and not much else is going to be firmly planted inches from my husband face while she stands and he sits, he will be giving up his seat, I will make sure of that.

 

[chuckml]

I like to offer my seat just because it makes me feel better, and I feel its the right thing to do, not because someone else deserves it more, or I'm afraid to get the evil eye, but just because being courteous to others helps everyone have a better day!

 

[TDSAXX]

When we get Paid Equal you can treat us as Equals... Until then we should be treated as the Goddess we are.... coz with out us.. the human race is pretty much over.

So STAND UP so we can SIT DOWN you male pigs!!!

I am always happy to give up my seat to a lady; but anyone who would refer to all men in such a nasty way is clearly no lady. Good manners are a two-way street.

 

[bakenatj]

When we get Paid Equal you can treat us as Equals... Until then we should be treated as the Goddess we are.... coz with out us.. the human race is pretty much over.

So STAND UP so we can SIT DOWN you male pigs!!!

Ummm wouldn't the human race be over if there weren't any males too??

I thought it was suppose to be the happiest place on earth!?!?
Why all the bitterness??

What is another 15 min on your feet? If the bus is full I stand.

 

[Ameraucanas]

I will give up my seat if someone is holding a child, they are elderly, or visibly disabled. But not for the sole purpose of being a woman.

Why do you ask? Because I have been chastised in the past by women calling me a chauvinist pig for doing things like this, including opening doors. If you are upset by this blame your fellow sisters! I learn quick, and I refuse to be yelled at only because I am trying to be kind. Also, 90% of the time they refuse anyway if they don't get upset at me. I stop being chivalrous to strangers years ago. Although now that I have arthritic knees I don't feel as guilty as I once did.

 

[Indiana Rose Lee]

Laurabearz, the human race isn't going to get by for long without men either. Equality!

And when the wages are compared job for job, the stats changed a lot. You might want up to date apples to apples stats. Unless you just want to play the victim.

 

[letthewookiewin]

Well if chivalry is dead I put the blame squarly on the shoulders of the feminist (and I'm a woman). How many time has a man offered to open a door for a woman, only to have that woman curse at him for doing it? If as a woman you expect to be treated equally, that means they will treat you like they would another man. If they wouldn't give up their seat for another able bodied man, then they wouldn't for you. Ladies you can't have it both ways. You can't complain about men given up their seat (or doing other things for you) just because your a woman, and then complain when they don't do those things because you are a woman.

That being said, I am raising both my DS's to be gentlemen. If we are on a full bus, I have them sit in our laps to free up their seats to someone (whether it be a man or woman) carrying a sleeping child, elderly, or anyone who looks like they need the seat. Honestly though, usually as soon as we see that people are going to have to stand, we usually have them sit in our laps anyway.

 

[SplashMtnCrew]

I recently went to WDW with my 3 children (8,6 and 2) and a friend. My friend and I were appalled by the number of men and boys who never offered to give up a bus seat for women or small children. In fact, more women offered their seats than men did. On so many occasions I saw (and was one) moms holding babies being forced to stand on a rocking, braking, turning bus because the seats were all taken - and many of the seated were men and older teen-aged boys.

It strengthened my resolve to teach my boys (and my girl, too!) good manners and how to be helpful in any situation.

OP it is sad, but chivalry is not dead. My DH and DS always give their seats up to ladies w/ small children (actually to both moms and dads, whoever is holding a small child), senior citizens, etc. under all circumstances in which it is appropriate not just at WDW. I imagine that more women gave up their seats b/c they understand what it's like to have babies, bags and strollers while standing up on a moving bus. I won't give my opinion as to why I believe chivalry is hard to find.

 

[DisneyStiles]

I haven't read all the posts but I do want to say the issue seems to be much more an issue of how kids (who turn into adults) are raised. Dads we are to teach our kids to show respect for woman, elderly etc etc - but moms you have to teach your boys how to treat people properly and teach your daughters to receive w/o attitude of "how dare you!" Ladies you are equal in value although there is in my mind different roles - and I for one am teaching my DD and DS how they are to treat people and how they should want to be treated. They are not perfect but I'm proud of them.

 

[bstnsprts]

I recently went to WDW with my 3 children (8,6 and 2) and a friend. My friend and I were appalled by the number of men and boys who never offered to give up a bus seat for women or small children. In fact, more women offered their seats than men did. On so many occasions I saw (and was one) moms holding babies being forced to stand on a rocking, braking, turning bus because the seats were all taken - and many of the seated were men and older teen-aged boys.

It strengthened my resolve to teach my boys (and my girl, too!) good manners and how to be helpful in any situation.

You should rent a car next time. You all can sit and your problem would be solved. That is what we do and my daughter always has a place to sit. I never have to expect anyone to give up a seat for my wife or daughter.

 

[Scurvy]

I always watch threads like this with interest. I was born and raised in the south and there was always a huge focus on manners. Yet it doesn't bother me a bit if there are men sitting on a bus while I have to stand. If I wanted to sit, I would wait for the next bus rather than getting on to an already crowded bus and expecting someone else who was there first to give me their seat. If I was simply unable to stand I would either plan on always waiting for a bus with available seating or I would provide my own transportation. To do otherwise, and expect that someone else will give up their seat for me, seems somewhat entitled.

My husband often gives up his seat to others and frankly I often wish he wouldn't. There are plently of people (both male and female) who look like they need the seat more than he thinks he does, and so he will give it to them. Then there are the women who expect to have a seat handed to them simply because they are female and they stand and glare at any men who remain seated. Frankly it isn't their business why those men are seated. Maybe they don't feel well, maybe they have an injury, maybe they are tired, or maybe they just don't feel like standing up. In the end, it doesn't matter. Those who choose to ride a bus that has standing room only are free to choose otherwise if they don't want to stand. They have other options. They shouldn't feel entitled to someone else's seat.

Chivalry isn't dead - I see it every day. I don't think the fact that someone isn't willing to stand on a crowded bus is really a very good test of their chivalry.

 

[WDSearcher]

On so many occasions I saw (and was one) moms holding babies being forced to stand on a rocking, braking, turning bus because the seats were all taken - and many of the seated were men and older teen-aged boys.

Those times that you were "being forced to stand on a rocking, braking, turning bus", did you ever ASK for a seat? Did any of the other moms holding kids? Probably not.

I will never understand why women (and I'm a woman too, so I'm not speaking ill of the opposite sex) will complain ad nauseum about men not standing up on a bus and offering their seat, but will not actually ASK when a seat is needed. If you need a seat, SPEAK UP! Don't expect everyone in the world to instantly assess your needs when you get on the bus. If you know you can't manage all your stuff while standing, and you don't want to wait for another bus, and no one seems to be offering, then ask. And if no one gives up their seat to you after a specific request, THEN you can grouse all you want.

 

[darlak]

This reminds me of a story one of my teachers told.

He said that one day he was walking out a door, when he saw a lady approaching. So, like he would always do, he held the door open for her. The lady actually got mad at him, and said "How dare you open the door for me just because I'm a lady", to which he replied, "Madam, I didn't hold the door open for you because you are a lady, but because I am a gentleman."

I will give up my seat if someone is holding a child, they are elderly, or visibly disabled. But not for the sole purpose of being a woman.

Why do you ask? Because I have been chastised in the past by women calling me a chauvinist pig for doing things like this, including opening doors. If you are upset by this blame your fellow sisters! I learn quick, and I refuse to be yelled at only because I am trying to be kind. Also, 90% of the time they refuse anyway if they don't get upset at me. I stop being chivalrous to strangers years ago. Although now that I have arthritic knees I don't feel as guilty as I once did.

Well if chivalry is dead I put the blame squarly on the shoulders of the feminist (and I'm a woman). How many time has a man offered to open a door for a woman, only to have that woman curse at him for doing it? If as a woman you expect to be treated equally, that means they will treat you like they would another man. If they wouldn't give up their seat for another able bodied man, then they wouldn't for you. Ladies you can't have it both ways. You can't complain about men given up their seat (or doing other things for you) just because your a woman, and then complain when they don't do those things because you are a woman.

That being said, I am raising both my DS's to be gentlemen. If we are on a full bus, I have them sit in our laps to free up their seats to someone (whether it be a man or woman) carrying a sleeping child.

The Goofster's right, I didn't teach my son to give up his seat for a woman, hold door's open for women, etc. because she's a lady. He doesn't know that woman and can't speak to her character...she may very well not be a lady. I taught him to do those things because I wanted him to be a gentleman. One has nothing to do with the other.

 

[1hero2princesses]

Just an FYI. People seem to get very crazy about this topic on these boards so put on you flame suit! Unfortunately some people on here don't feel they should bother to give up their seat to anyone, for almost any reason because they go there first. Personally I don't feel that way. I did have an experience last fall that upset me. We got on the bus one evening from MK. We were somewhat towards the front of a long line. I was trying to balance my bag, help the 3 kids, DH had the stroller. So we get on and immediately see the seats are all taken. Before we could turn around to get off at least 20 people pile in behind us. We were stuck. Lights pop off, bus starts rolling. DH is trying to balance the double stroller and brace DS5 as he struggled to hold on. I am trying to hold DD17 months, balance my bag on my back and hold DD4 up- who is crying as she is falling over. I didn't know what to do. I really thought I would fall. My DH was telling me to sit down on the floor. Finally a woman sitting saw me struggling gives her boyfriend/husband whatever he was a whack and says get up -can't you see she is going to fall? I felt a little bad but took the seat and put both girls on my lap. I would be perfectly happy to stand but the kids safety is the most important.

 

[famsen]

DH and I give up our bus seats to women with children as much as possible but there are times when DH's back or knees are just killing him and he has to sit down. I don't want him injuring himself trying balance himself while standing on a moving bus. There was a time when I got horribly sick at one of the parks and if I had to stand up while on the bus and tried to balance myself then I probably would have thrown up, so I waited for the next bus were I was sure to get a seat AND there was no way I was giving up my seat for anyone. Sometime a person just HAS to sit down no matter how chivalrous they try to be.

 

[shaws2003]

I can see this thread getting shut down soon. So before it does, I will add my two cents. Chivalry is NOT dead in my household. My DS8 and I will stand on a bus for ANYONE that needs a seat, male, female, young and old, handicapped, it doesn't matter. If you need a seat, we will gladly give up ours. We will also hold a door for EVERYONE. IMHO, it is all about how you were raised. I was taught to hold doors, give up seats, not to be rude and I expect the same from my children.

 

[WDSearcher]

In my opinion unless you are a man in a wheel chair you should be giving up your seat. If you not in a wheel chair and you can manage to drag yourself around a theme park all day, you should have no problem standing for a few more minutes on the bus.

But ... didn't all those women and moms with kids manage to drag themeselves around the themepark all day too? Shouldn't they be able to stand for a few more minutes on the bus without a problem too?

 

[Laurabearz]

Laurabearz, the human race isn't going to get by for long without men either. Equality!

And when the wages are compared job for job, the stats changed a lot. You might want up to date apples to apples stats. Unless you just want to play the victim.

Actually there is enough male samples stored away that if all men went sterile today, it would be 100's of years before there would no longer be children, but that's not here nor there


I was JOKING PEOPLE>>>>>