Chivalry is dead.

[DONALD38]

Each time we have been to Disney it amazed my wife and I how many people would let an elderly person or a parent stand holding a small child (3 or younger) or even small child stand (6 or younger) on a bus. I always give up my seat for those that need it more for their health and their safty. Last trip was are first trip with are 2 year old son and I would say about less that half of the trips on the bus someone gave their seat up for my wife and son. Some times i would have to say something to someone and ask them if they could sit while the bus was in motion. Most of the time when a seat was offered to my Wife and son it was a woman that offered while other men and young adults sat their trying to ignore what was happening.

I hear some mention how they stood in line just like everyone else or they can wait for the next bus. For those people I have to say have a little courtesy and use some common sence. Some day your going to be in those same situations needing a seat and you will be the ones wishing to get one.

The other thing, for safety I wish Disney would not allow the drivers of the busses to pack them like a sardine can. It would be nice if Disney could modify their buses so wheelchair, stollers and packages could be stored in compartments under the bus.

 

[rentayenta]

When we get Paid Equal you can treat us as Equals... Until then we should be treated as the Goddess we are.... coz with out us.. the human race is pretty much over.

So STAND UP so we can SIT DOWN you male pigs!!!

Funniest thing I have read in a while!

 

[MAF]

I don't find it humorous that that particular poster is calling all males pigs. Would I be able to calle all females hephers and be able to get away with it?

 

[Indiana Rose Lee]

IMO there is no excuse for having a wee child out when the park closes at 10, and not expect that they'll be over stimulated and over tired and crabby or fall asleep on a bus. To tell me that this was unexpected to you is insulting my intelligence. Even for children that are night owls, that's ridiculous IMO. If you're tired, they're probably way past exhausted and you will pay for that either with a comatose child you have to carry, a hyper over active child or one who is fussy and upset. Not all, but chances are good. If you were sick for the session on common sense parenting 101, it's not MY responsibility to adjust MY vacation in any way to accommodate you.

If I choose to be nice, fine. It will be for the sake of your poor child, not for your sake, sorry. If I choose not to bail you out of a situation you put yourself and your child in, it doesn't make me rude or uncaring, or anything other than worn out and ready to call it a day myself.

Some "wee children" come from places with different time zones entirely. What is 10:00 to you may very well be 7:00 to them. They may have gone home and had a 3 hour nap, etc.

The selfish focus that you portray is why the world feels so much less friendly. It has nothing to do with male or female or anything else. Some people see the world and life as a chance to be a blessing to others, and feel pretty darn good about it. Probably better than you feel sitting there with a self righteous attitude. While you may be the perfect parent, most of us make good and bad decisions, and just work to do the best we can by our family. It is a karma thing. When they are little, kindness is appreciated, as they grow, they are expected to reciprocate. Boys and girls.

Once when my oldest was two, we were trying to keep him awake until we got back to our cabin in Fort Wilderness. The bus driver started singing "wheels on the bus" and the rest of the bus joined in. It is one of the sweetest memories I have of Disney.

Since then, when we see a fusser we attempt to be the same blessing. My kids have been known to start a game of peek a boo, make silly faces or whatever helps distract. And a mom who receives a sympathetic look and kind word leaves feeling better. As opposed to being around those who think she screwed up and is the cause of all the problems. I thought women were supposed to support one another.

 

[lustergirl]

It's not dead on the Shades of Green busses. And its not just a male/female thing. Everyone, young or old, is always offering to give up seats for people who appear they might need them. Its a refreshing change to see teenagers (male and female) being polite and nice on the bus. Quite a change form the public transportation sytems at home!

This is because there is a military background with each and everyone on the bus, whether it be father, hubby, uncle, aunt, grandma or grandpa. etc etc. I come from a family of military and we have a different way of viewing things.

 

[lexmelinda]

This issue really isn't about chivalry, it's about consideration. Maybe some people remember that word?

All healthy adults, men and women, should offer their seats to pregnant women, moms carrying small children, and elderly people. Not just on Disney buses but everywhere.

All responsible adults who are in seats should be considerate enough not take up extra space with shopping bags and by letting small children take seats that could be occupied by people who really need them. Especially when there is a shortage of seating.

Be considerate. Show some respect. Remember YOU might be the one who needs that seat someday.

 

[dawnbu40]

My family (DH, DD age 6, and myself) always give up our seats as needed...to anyone - female, male, young, old, pregnant, etc...who we can offer them to, especially if they look like they need it. That is our choice, and we will continue to do so.

The ONLY thing that irritates me is when parents don't pull smaller children onto their laps to open up a seat. On my last trip, on a bus after Wishes, there were six seats with little kids (i'm talking 2 or 3 years old, itty bitty ones) on a bus with over 20 standing people. I am NOT saying they don't deserve a seat. I just think that when the bus is that crowded, my opinion is that they could easily go on a lap to let another guest sit down who may need to.

My DD is very tall for her age and even now, at age 6, will sit on one of our laps if we choose to stay in our seats at all.

I totally agree! I saw this so much in May and it drove me crazy! My DH has back problems and yet he always gives up his seat but it made me so mad he had to stand while a 2 year old took up a seat and the parents were too inconsiderate to hold them! Chivalry isn't dead....good manners are!

 

[Withacy]

I really find this discussion unbelievable.

If someone slips and falls in the street, you don't HAVE TO help them up. You can just leave them there and step around or over them.

If someone is exiting or entering a building right behind you, you don't HAVE TO hold the door for them. You can let it go right in their face.

If the person in front of you at McDonalds is a quarter short for their meal, you don't HAVE TO give them some of your spare change. You can tap your foot impatiently while they squirm and make rude comments because you're impatient.

And if you're sitting on a bus - man or woman, old or young - you don't HAVE TO get up for ANYONE. You can ignore someone in destress and justify it anyway you please.

But it's what we CHOOSE to do that separates decent people from people just taking up space. A person with a generous spirit doesn't do things because they HAVE TO do them, but because they're moved by compassion to help someone - whether or not they "know" that the person "deserves" it.

Do I expect anyone to give up their seat for me? Absolutely not. But if someone I was with didn't offer up their seat to someone more in need of it, or God forbid, got indignant about that person being there at all - I would lose all respect for them.

 

[goofy4tink]

I agree. I feel much better! I just got one more issue to get off my chest and I will be free! Just waiting for the "Scooter thread".

For the love of God...don't go there!!
In any case...before TLinden16 gets here and closes this one...
Try to remember that chivilry isn't what is used to be. Has anyone noticed that men are no longer putting their coats across puddles so women don't get their dainty tootsies wet? Or that men and boys seldom, if ever, rise when a woman enters the room? Or that women no longer have their chairs pulled out, and then pushed in for them??
This isn't about courtesy. It's about being considerate. If you feel that you can safely, and easily for you, give up your seat to someone who may need it more then do so. But for us to post here about what other people 'should do' and what they are if they choose not to do as we would wish is just ridiculous.
My dh may look, to all of you, that he is an able bodied guy. But, until he had his knee replacement, a rocking bus was no place for him to be standing. Do you want him falling onto you or your child as you sit there?? I doubt it. But that's what would happen. Or, what about when my dd, who looked pretty healthy, was actually sick?? No way was she standing on that bus. But normally she will give up her seat.

There is just no way to tell if someone 'can' safely stand. How about we all just make the assumption that those who can stand, will choose to do so if someone else needs the seat. Sure does make more sense than getting into an equality argument, or one that calls men pigs, or some such silly argument.
Consideration works both ways....try to consider that some able looking folks may very well not be able bodied. Don't just assume they are rude and entitiled. And don't assume that because I'm 60, and a woman, that I need your seat, or won't give up a seat to someone else.

 

[Indiana Rose Lee]

This issue really isn't about chivalry, it's about consideration. Maybe some people remember that word?

All healthy adults, men and women, should offer their seats to pregnant women, moms carrying small children, and elderly people. Not just on Disney buses but everywhere.

All responsible adults who are in seats should be considerate enough not take up extra space with shopping bags and by letting small children take seats that could be occupied by people who really need them. Especially when there is a shortage of seating.

Be considerate. Show some respect. Remember YOU might be the one who needs that seat someday.

Well said!

 

[chuckml]

I really find this discussion unbelievable.

If someone slips and falls in the street, you don't HAVE TO help them up. You can just leave them there and step around or over them.

If someone is exiting or entering a building right behind you, you don't HAVE TO hold the door for them. You can let it go right in their face.

If the person in front of you at McDonalds is a quarter short for their meal, you don't HAVE TO give them some of your spare change. You can tap your foot impatiently while they squirm and make rude comments because you're impatient.

And if you're sitting on a bus - man or woman, old or young - you don't HAVE TO get up for ANYONE. You can ignore someone in destress and justify it anyway you please.

But it's what we CHOOSE to do that separates decent people from people just taking up space. A person with a generous spirit doesn't do things because they HAVE TO do them, but because they're moved by compassion to help someone - whether or not they "know" that the person "deserves" it.

Do I expect anyone to give up their seat for me? Absolutely not. But if someone I was with didn't offer up their seat to someone more in need of it, or God forbid, got indignant about that person being there at all - I would lose all respect for them.

Well said!

 

[Indiana Rose Lee]

For the love of God...don't go there!!
In any case...before TLinden16 gets here and closes this one...
Try to remember that chivilry isn't what is used to be. Has anyone noticed that men are no longer putting their coats across puddles so women don't get their dainty tootsies wet? Or that men and boys seldom, if ever, rise when a woman enters the room? Or that women no longer have their chairs pulled out, and then pushed in for them??
This isn't about courtesy. It's about being considerate. If you feel that you can safely, and easily for you, give up your seat to someone who may need it more then do so. But for us to post here about what other people 'should do' and what they are if they choose not to do as we would wish is just ridiculous.
My dh may look, to all of you, that he is an able bodied guy. But, until he had his knee replacement, a rocking bus was no place for him to be standing. Do you want him falling onto you or your child as you sit there?? I doubt it. But that's what would happen. Or, what about when my dd, who looked pretty healthy, was actually sick?? No way was she standing on that bus. But normally she will give up her seat.

There is just no way to tell if someone 'can' safely stand. How about we all just make the assumption that those who can stand, will choose to do so if someone else needs the seat. Sure does make more sense than getting into an equality argument, or one that calls men pigs, or some such silly argument.
Consideration works both ways....try to consider that some able looking folks may very well not be able bodied. Don't just assume they are rude and entitiled. And don't assume that because I'm 60, and a woman, that I need your seat, or won't give up a seat to someone else.

You make a good point. One can't tell what others need. And the evil eye is stupid.

But I will also let you know that if we are on a bus, and you are standing, one of my kids will offer you their seat. Now, when that occursjust know that you are more than welcome to let them know that your hubbie would really appreciate it!

 

[Scurvy]

Each time we have been to Disney it amazed my wife and I how many people would let an elderly person or a parent stand holding a small child (3 or younger) or even small child stand (6 or younger) on a bus. I always give up my seat for those that need it more for their health and their safty. Last trip was are first trip with are 2 year old son and I would say about less that half of the trips on the bus someone gave their seat up for my wife and son. Some times i would have to say something to someone and ask them if they could sit while the bus was in motion. Most of the time when a seat was offered to my Wife and son it was a woman that offered while other men and young adults sat their trying to ignore what was happening.

I hear some mention how they stood in line just like everyone else or they can wait for the next bus. For those people I have to say have a little courtesy and use some common sence. Some day your going to be in those same situations needing a seat and you will be the ones wishing to get one.

Regarding the bolded, (and I am not trying to be argumentative; I'm truly curious) if it's important to you that they be allowed to sit on the bus, then why would you get on a bus that has no open seats? What would you do if no one was willing to give up their seat? What if everyone who was willing to stand had already given their seat to someone who got there before you?

If it isn't important enough to you that are are willing to be sure that they have seats, why should it be that important to someone else?

This isn't about courtesy. It's about being considerate. If you feel that you can safely, and easily for you, give up your seat to someone who may need it more then do so. But for us to post here about what other people 'should do' and what they are if they choose not to do as we would wish is just ridiculous.
My dh may look, to all of you, that he is an able bodied guy. But, until he had his knee replacement, a rocking bus was no place for him to be standing. Do you want him falling onto you or your child as you sit there?? I doubt it. But that's what would happen. Or, what about when my dd, who looked pretty healthy, was actually sick?? No way was she standing on that bus. But normally she will give up her seat.

There is just no way to tell if someone 'can' safely stand. How about we all just make the assumption that those who can stand, will choose to do so if someone else needs the seat. Sure does make more sense than getting into an equality argument, or one that calls men pigs, or some such silly argument.
Consideration works both ways....try to consider that some able looking folks may very well not be able bodied. Don't just assume they are rude and entitiled.

I agree completely.

 

[TCO]

This thread is really going places.

And by going places I mean around in circles.

we all have opinions on it and it's clear that nobodies will change, some people have a God given sense of entitlement, some people may be selfish and then theres everything in between.

 

[disneynewbee]

I really find this discussion unbelievable.

If someone slips and falls in the street, you don't HAVE TO help them up. You can just leave them there and step around or over them.

If someone is exiting or entering a building right behind you, you don't HAVE TO hold the door for them. You can let it go right in their face.

If the person in front of you at McDonalds is a quarter short for their meal, you don't HAVE TO give them some of your spare change. You can tap your foot impatiently while they squirm and make rude comments because you're impatient.

And if you're sitting on a bus - man or woman, old or young - you don't HAVE TO get up for ANYONE. You can ignore someone in destress and justify it anyway you please.

But it's what we CHOOSE to do that separates decent people from people just taking up space. A person with a generous spirit doesn't do things because they HAVE TO do them, but because they're moved by compassion to help someone - whether or not they "know" that the person "deserves" it.

Do I expect anyone to give up their seat for me? Absolutely not. But if someone I was with didn't offer up their seat to someone more in need of it, or God forbid, got indignant about that person being there at all - I would lose all respect for them.

 

[disneynewbee]

Well said

Some "wee children" come from places with different time zones entirely. What is 10:00 to you may very well be 7:00 to them. They may have gone home and had a 3 hour nap, etc.

The selfish focus that you portray is why the world feels so much less friendly. It has nothing to do with male or female or anything else. Some people see the world and life as a chance to be a blessing to others, and feel pretty darn good about it. Probably better than you feel sitting there with a self righteous attitude. While you may be the perfect parent, most of us make good and bad decisions, and just work to do the best we can by our family. It is a karma thing. When they are little, kindness is appreciated, as they grow, they are expected to reciprocate. Boys and girls.

Once when my oldest was two, we were trying to keep him awake until we got back to our cabin in Fort Wilderness. The bus driver started singing "wheels on the bus" and the rest of the bus joined in. It is one of the sweetest memories I have of Disney.

Since then, when we see a fusser we attempt to be the same blessing. My kids have been known to start a game of peek a boo, make silly faces or whatever helps distract. And a mom who receives a sympathetic look and kind word leaves feeling better. As opposed to being around those who think she screwed up and is the cause of all the problems. I thought women were supposed to support one another.

 

[crashbb]

Thank you. It was an observation. The only time I felt that I *needed* a seat was on one trip where I was holding a baby. Even then, I just observed the situation - didn't ask, didn't fuss, didn't demand, didn't presume. No one had to give me his or her seat. It just really piqued my interest as to the situation.

That why were you shocked when men/boys didn't give up their seats to women or children? I'm not generally shocked when something doesn't happen unless I expected it to happen.

So, if you weren't expecting people to give up their seats to women, why were you shocked when they didn't?

 

[nooneshome]

I'm a 51 year old male with a bad knee and hip. At the end of each park day I'm hurting pretty good but you might not be able to tell. When I am lucky enough to get a seat on the bus ride back to the resort, if there is someone I feel is in more need of the seat then myself I always offer my seat to them. My DS15 does the same. On our last trip I was amazed at how hard it was to get someone to take my seat. Once we had people standing with empty seats available. When I did give my seat to another person, the person made an announcement that at least some people are still considerate. I felt bad for the other men.

 

[TLinden16]

I think this thread has run it's course now, and it's time to politely close it.